I watched Wyatt’s broad back out of the corner of my eye as he walked across the room and through the door. My stomach pinched painfully as I remembered how many times I’d watched him walk away from me in the past. And then I’d remember that this time was my fault and my belly would cramp even more.
Abraham went over what would happen while he was away meeting with other packs and I only half listened. I knew I should be paying better attention. Our uncle in Charlotte was planning an attack against our pack any day and Abraham was leaving for a week to find us allies.
Conrad still blamed Abraham for his son’s death. Even though Calvin had been a serial killing psychopath and it hadn’t been Abey’s fault, that didn’t seem to matter to our uncle. Abraham had taken something of his and now he was retaliating.
But the black cloud that surrounded me like a shield was basically impenetrable.
I couldn’t find it in me to care that we were all in danger.
I couldn’t find it in me to care that my brother would be leaving pack lands for longer than he ever had in the past.
I couldn’t find it in me to care that our way of life was in jeopardy.
All I knew was the hurt and the pain and the loss that constantly swirled around my head and the ache in my chest that never went away.
When Abraham finally dismissed us, I slowly stood and started making my way toward the door. Instead of another sleepless night, I had plans to work through the long hours. I figured if I couldn’t sleep, I might as well be useful.
A thin arm linked through mine and I turned to find Bea next to me, a sad smile on her face. “You look like you could use some ice cream.”
I gave her a weak smile. “I don’t think ice cream will fix this,” I told her softly.
She shook her head. “Ice cream might not fix it, but it always makes everything a little better. Let’s go see what Ms. Elsie’s got in the freezer.”
I let her pull me along through the conference room and out the door, but as soon as we made it into the hall, my feet stopped short along with my heart.
Leaning against the opposite wall was Wyatt, looking so handsome it actually hurt. My poor heart kick started in my chest and raced ahead as I watched him push off the wall and stand to his full height. My mind raced with what he had to say or why he was coming to talk to me after all this time.
Maybe he was here to make up.
Maybe he was here to apologize.
Maybe he was getting by without me as well as I was getting by without him, which was terribly.
Maybe–
“Hey, Bea, I was wondering if me and Wes could trade shifts. I’ll take his tonight and he’ll pick up mine tomorrow.”
My sister paused for only a moment and I knew it was for my benefit. I loved her a little more for it. “Um. Yeah. That’s fine.”
He nodded once before spinning around and walking away.
Just like that.
He didn’t have anything to say to me.
He didn’t spare me a single glance.
He didn’t even acknowledge I was there.
As my heart literally cracked down the middle, I realized I’d finally come to the last stage of grief: acceptance.
Things were well and truly over between me and Wyatt. There was no starting over for us. No umpteenth chance. No way back from this.
I’d officially lost him for good and I had no one to blame but myself.
***
Acceptance was turning out to be the hardest of the steps.
Maybe it was because I couldn’t distance myself from Wyatt. I felt him every single day whether it was at work or back on pack lands. That tugging in my belly never went away. If I couldn’t forget about him for even a few moments, how was I supposed to get over him?
Maybe it was because, even though I’d skated through all the stages of grief, I hadn’t been able to fully kick the denial. I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that things were really over. He’d always come back to me in the past. It was hard to believe this time would be different, even though deep down I knew it was.
Maybe it was because I’d never felt this way about anyone before in my life.
Maybe it was because I wasn’t used to giving up.
I didn’t know.
There were a lot of things I didn’t know.
But one thing I did was this grieving nonsense was for the birds.
I was nose deep in some test results I’d just got back from the lab when that feeling in my belly intensified. I picked my head up and cocked it to the side as I felt Wyatt come closer and closer to me. He hadn’t ventured down this hall once in the week and a half we’d been open. Why was today different?
I shouldn’t have been surprised by the knock on my door, but I still startled at the obtrusive sound. I straightened my spine, brushed my wild hair away from my face and did my best to portray a calm front, even though everything inside me was the exact opposite.
“Come in,” I called.
Even knowing it was him, seeing Wyatt step through my door was a shock to my system. Despite my calm exterior, my heart was racing, and my palms were already sweating. I hadn’t been this close to him in days and I was feeling every minute of that time.
“What is it?” I did my best to keep my tone curt and not let on the affect he was having on me. It might have sounded rude, but it was the best I could do in this situation.
Wyatt didn’t seem to notice, his face already lined with worry. “It’s Ellie. She’s sick and I don’t know how to help her.”
Hearing my friend was in trouble pushed all thoughts of our situation out of my head. I lurched to my feet and scuttled around the desk. “Is she in her office?”
He nodded and fell in line as I hurried into the hall and down to Ellie’s room. The door was ajar, and I didn’t bother knocking before entering her office.
The smell of vomit permeated the air and I did my best not to react to it. “Ellie?” I called moments before my eyes latched onto her doubled over behind her desk. She looked up at me, her face pale with an almost green hue. It seemed like she was about to say something, but before she could, her face got even paler and she turned around to throw up again.
I hurried over to her side and rubbed her back as she heaved into her trash can. With a quick glance over my shoulder, I said, “Wyatt, go grab her a glass of water and a wet rag from the bathroom.”
He nodded and left the room so quickly, it was clear he was uncomfortable.
“I’ve never… heard you speak… so civilly to him… before,” Ellie gasped between retching.
I paused as I looked at the back of her head. I hadn’t realized she’d noticed my interactions with Wyatt, and I struggled to answer her. Finally, I said, “I speak to him civilly.”
She lifted her head and shot me a look I had no trouble interpreting, even with her resembling death warmed over. Moments later, she pressed her lips together before turning and vomiting again. I sighed and rubbed her back as she heaved on and off for the next few minutes.
There was finally a small break and she leaned back, sucking in large gulps of air. My heart broke for my friend as I peeled the damp hair off her sticky forehead. “Still think he’s not your fated mate?” I asked.
Honestly, I could be saying that exact phrase to myself. I felt the hypocrisy down to my bones, but I didn’t have time to think about my situation right then. I was focusing on Ellie.
Everyone knew that when fated mates were separated like Abey and Ellie were, that both would have withdrawal symptoms. Not eating, barely sleeping, headaches, and grogginess, were all signs you were missing your fated mate. I tried not to think how that might relate to me and just focused on Ellie.
Moments later, my attention split again as Wyatt came back into the room with the things I’d asked him to get. I placed the wet cloth on her head and got her to take a few small sips of water while doing my best to ignore the man across the room.
Her phone rang and I watched as she reach
ed for it before changing her mind and shoving her head back in her wastebasket. With a sigh I said, “I’ll get it.”
It was Abraham, of course, and he was, unsurprisingly, worrying about his mate. Honestly, I was worrying about his mate too. But I assured him she was okay, and I was helping as much as I could. I finally got him off the phone after promising she’d call him back as soon as she could.
I started rubbing her back again, wracking my brain for what I could do to help. Unfortunately, I had no experience with helping sick people because werewolves didn’t get sick. But emptying your stomach wasn’t good for anyone, especially a wolf.
“I think you should eat or drink something to calm your stomach,” I said.
She shook her head. “Whatever I eat just comes right back up.”
“What about some ginger ale? Ginger is supposed to be good for upset stomachs.”
“I’ll go run to the deli,” Wyatt said from across the room.
Without a word from us, he hurried across the floor, shutting the door softly behind him. I took the first real breath I’d taken since he’d been in the room and did my best to focus on Ellie. That proved much easier without half of my attention on him.
“Callie, what’s going on with you and Wyatt?”
My heart stopped in my chest for a moment, my brain following suit. I glanced toward the door quickly before answering, “It’s nothing.”
“Nothing? You practically had steam coming out of your ears when you found out he’d be coming to work with me every day.”
My face instantly heated as I looked away again. Dang it. I never should have reacted like that in front of other people. This whole mess with Wyatt started because I wanted to keep our relationship private, yet there I was, the one causing scenes and raising questions.
“I can keep a secret, Callie,” she continued. “I just want to know what’s going on with you. Clearly, it’s something big, or you wouldn’t be reacting like this.”
I glanced at her. “Promise you’ll keep this between us?”
“I won’t say a word to anyone. Not even Abraham.”
Was I really doing this? The only other person who knew anything about us was Bea and even that felt like too many people. Maybe I could give her enough information that she’d stop asking questions.
I sighed. “It’s a long story, and one I don’t want to get into when he could be back any minute.”
“Just give me the gist.”
I let my head fall back and stared at the ceiling for a moment as I searched for the words to sum up the entirety of the mess I was in. Finally, I settled on, “He wants more than I’m willing to give.”
She gasped, and my eyes darted to her again. “He likes you, doesn’t he?”
I rolled my eyes. If only it were that simple. “We’re not in middle school, Ellie.”
“But he does, doesn’t he? He likes you.”
Does he like me? If you’d asked me that two weeks ago, I would have known exactly how to answer. Now? That question was a lot more complicated. So, I shrugged. “I guess you could say that.” Although that probably wasn’t the case anymore. I swallowed that bitter pill and did my best to keep a straight face.
“So, what’s the problem? You don’t like him back?”
I gave her an exasperated look. “Do you think we could talk about this like adults and not pre-teens?”
“Just answer the question.”
I bit my lip.
Did I like him? More than I should.
Did I care about him? More than I’d ever be able to put into words.
Did I love him? I couldn’t deny that either.
But I didn’t want her to know any of that, so I said, “I don’t know, Ellie. And I’m not willing to find out.”
“Why the heck not? Wyatt’s a great guy.”
“I never said he wasn’t.”
“Then what’s holding you back?”
“It’s complicated.”
“I’m sure I can keep up.”
Just then, a set of heavy footsteps clomping down the hall reached both of our ears and I heaved a sigh of relief that this conversation was over. I’d done enough sharing for one day.
The door opened and my spine stiffened without my permission. It had become like an armor of sorts.
“Hey, Wyatt. Thanks for running to the store for me,” Ellie rasped.
I saw him shrug out of the corner of my eye before he pulled a bottle of soda out of a bag and handed it to her. I held my breath as his arm came within inches of my face. I didn’t need his scent permeating my senses any more than it already did.
I focused on Ellie again and watched as she took a tentative sip of her ginger ale. “Thanks, guys. I think I’ll be all right for a while at least.”
I watched her for a moment, waiting for any signs she’d be sick again. “You sure? I can stay if you need me.” I crossed my fingers in my head and prayed she said no. I’d do just about anything for her, but being that close to Wyatt was wreaking havoc on my insides and I just wanted to hide in my office and lick my wounds for a little while.
She waved a hand and took another sip. “I’m fine. I’m just going to get some research done while my stomach is behaving.”
I watched her for a few more moments before reminding her to call Abey back and slinking out of the room. I didn’t spare a glance for Wyatt, but I could feel his eyes on me as I left. Once I was in the hallway alone, I let the shiver I’d been holding back run down my spine.
I made it to my office and slumped into my chair before burying my face in my hands. It was clear I’d need to work much harder at this acceptance stuff if I was ever going to get over him.
Chapter 34
Callie
“Hey. What’s going on?”
I’d just stepped out of my office to find Wyatt and Ellie rushing down the hallway toward the front door. My brows pulled into a frown as they stopped to look at me. As far as I knew, she’d only gotten into work a little while ago. So why was she leaving already?
My eyes were on Ellie, but it was Wyatt that answered. “The issue with her car is bigger than we thought. We’re heading back to pack lands right now,” he grunted.
Ellie had texted me earlier to let me know her car broke down on the highway and she’d be late, but that was the last I’d heard about it. So, what was going on now and why were they in such a hurry?
I glanced at him quickly, but not long enough to take in those features I’d already memorized. When I turned back to Ellie, I said, “I can give you guys a ride home if you want to wait a minute.”
Wyatt shook his head. “Don’t bother. Wes is almost here.”
Dismissed.
That’s exactly what he’d just done, and to be honest, it didn’t feel good.
Wyatt turned to usher Ellie back down the hall, but she stiffened and stopped his forward trajectory. When she turned back around, she said, “Thanks for the offer, Callie. You stay here and finish out your day. I brought a bunch of stuff home with me, so I can get more work done there.”
I waved a dismissive hand. “Don’t worry about that, Ellie. There are bigger issues you need to be focusing on than The Asheville Initiative right now.” Without my permission, my gaze jumped to Wyatt for a moment before focusing on Ellie again. “Have you told Abey yet?”
She winced, and I knew the answer without her having to say it out loud. Apparently, I didn’t need to reprimand her out loud either.
“I didn’t want to worry him when we didn’t know if there was actually anything to worry about yet.”
“Ellie, he’s not going to be happy about that.”
She sighed. “Yes, but his trip is more important than what’s going on here.”
I arched a brow in her direction. “Don’t you think he should be the one to decide that?”
Her shoulders fell, like the weight of the world had been resting on them. Honestly, I couldn’t imagine how she was feeling. She’d been the target of more animosity than anyone I�
��d ever known in my life. On top of that, she was fated to an alpha of a big pack which meant she’d been taking on those responsibilities as well. She’d never signed up for this life, but she was handling it with a grace that made me proud.
“Probably,” she admitted. “I thought I was doing the right thing by holding off. You know how important it is for him to find us more allies.” She lowered her voice before continuing. “The Charlotte pack could attack any day. We need all the help we can get if we’re going to have a fighting chance. You know that.”
I swallowed harshly at our new reality before sighing. “Yeah, you’re right. I just know he won’t be happy about being kept in the dark.”
“Well, I’m going to take the blame for this one. I did what I thought was best at the time. Now that we know it was foul play, I’ll call and fill him in.”
My heart stopped as my eyes went wide. “Foul play?”
She smiled, but it wasn’t happy. “Apparently my brake lines were cut.”
I gasped. “Oh, Ellie.”
Who would have done something like that? Who felt that strongly about her that they’d sabotage her car? As I thought more about it, the list of people who didn’t like Ellie started to grow. She hadn’t exactly had an easy transition into life in our pack and it seemed like she wasn’t getting a break any time soon.
“Yeah, that was definitely not the news I was hoping for,” she said with a shrug.
“What are you going to do?”
Wyatt, clearly done with being ignored, stepped up next to Ellie and wrapped his fingers around her arm. My eyes zeroed in on the contact as my stomach pinched painfully.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
I wasn’t jealous of Ellie right now. I really wasn’t. But it was hard to watch him touch someone else when I’d been yearning for the feel of his calloused hands on my skin for what felt like forever. I shook my head and locked those thoughts in a box. I was being ridiculous, and we had more important things to worry about.
Wyatt’s voice broke through my mental train wreck. “We’re going to figure out who the hell is responsible and make them pay.” He looked down at Ellie and continued, “We’re leaving now, Ellie.”
Chasing Callie (Southern Werewolf Sisters Book 1) Page 28