by Wendi Wilson
And I was alone.
It was what I’d wanted, but as the silence settled around me, I realized it was probably not what I needed. True King was a force of nature, and there was no room for self-pity or wallowing in her world.
True would have worked her magic and cheered me up. She would have made me laugh. She would have convinced me I had nothing to worry about and that despite his high level of hotness, Levi Kass’s opinion of me meant nothing.
And I’d know she was right.
But lying here alone in my bed, my mind was spinning. I searched my memory, replaying every interaction I’d had with Levi, and I couldn’t come up with a single moment that might explain his obvious repulsion toward me. It came out of nowhere, and it was messing with my head.
I wondered what Coco would say about all of this. I rolled off my bunk and reached underneath, grabbing the strap of my duffel bag and pulling it out. I’d forgotten I hid my phone in there, and I was sure Coco had sent me at least four dozen text messages by now.
Unzipping the bag, I rooted around until my fingers closed around the device. Pulling it out, I plopped down on the mattress and powered it on. Sending up a little prayer it still had some juice, I waited impatiently for the home screen to load. There was a charging cord in my bag, but I needed to wait until after curfew if I was going to take the risk of plugging it in. Less chance of getting caught with the contraband.
I breathed a sigh of relief as the home screen popped up, and there was just enough power to check my messages. I waited for the notifications to appear, but nothing happened. I opened the texting app and tapped on the icon next to Coco’s name.
Nothing. No new texts since the day I arrived.
Me: Hey u. Srry haven’t texted. No phones allowed here. Lame.
I waited for a full minute with no response before sending another message.
Me: I’m breaking like the cardinal rule here. Least u can do is hit me back.
This time, I waited two minutes. Still nothing. I gritted my teeth and inhaled deeply through my nose. She was probably busy doing summertime things with summertime friends. I couldn’t expect Coco to drop everything for me the second I needed her.
Except, I did expect it, because she always had. That’s part of why she was such an amazing friend—she was always there for me, no matter what.
So where was she now?
Me: Srry I missed u. Don’t know when I’ll get a chance to text again. Love you, Bubbly Piper.
I waited a few minutes more before I grudgingly powered the phone down and shoved it back into my bag. I made a mental note to charge it up tonight after I was sure everyone was in bed. Kicking the duffel back under the bunk, I settled onto the mattress and waited for True to get back from lunch.
“Tomorrow, the campers will arrive.”
Dean Purty’s voice echoed around the mess hall, startling me into dropping my spoon into my cereal bowl and splashing milk all over the table. True gasped and sucked some oatmeal down her windpipe, which led to an explosion of hacking coughs.
I clapped her on the back in an attempt to help clear her airway as my gaze travelled to the other occupied table. Sarah and Analise were laughing, their eyes glued to True as she practically coughed up a lung. Lars, Ian, Miranda, and Naveen just looked bored. Micah, of course, watched me with daggers in her eyes.
What the hell is her problem? Hasn’t she realized by now I’m most definitely not her competition for Levi’s affections?
He hadn’t shown up for breakfast, so I’d assumed he was eating with the dean again. Only, Dean Purty was here, so where was Levi?
A white-hot bolt of panic seared through me. What if he left? He’d told the dean he couldn’t be here anymore, and now he was missing. Was I really to blame? I still didn’t know what I did to make him want to leave.
I clenched my back teeth and closed my eyes, taking a few deep, calming breaths. I pictured a tall waterfall in my mind. The deafening roar of the water cascading down. The cool mist it created dampening my skin.
It was a technique Dr. Whitley had taught me when I first started seeing her. The visualization helped calm my anxiety, curbing off a panic attack before it gained any traction. I hadn’t been using it lately, thus the passing-out, and I was determined not to lose consciousness now. My heart rate slowed, and I unclenched my jaw before opening my eyes.
After Dad died, I had daily panic attacks. Fear of darkness. Fear of loud noises. Fear of small spaces. Fear of abandonment.
Dr. Whitley helped me through each of them, but I still suffered from claustrophobia and abandonment issues. I doubted I’d ever feel comfortable in tight, dark spaces again—not that I ever did, but the phobia was so much worse, now.
When I lost my dad, and subsequently, most of my friends, I started having anxiety attacks at the thought of losing Mom or Coco. Or even Dr. Whitley, despite my grumbling complaints about having to go to therapy.
With Coco not answering my texts last night and Levi missing today, that fear of everyone leaving me kicked up to levels I hadn’t felt in months. It made me feel foolish. Coco would never leave me, and Levi? Well, you can’t actually lose something you never had, right?
“Today, you’ll be split into groups,” Dean Purty said, pulling me from my thoughts. “Each group will rotate through seven stations—boating safety by the lake, animal care by the barn, helmet, harness, and climbing safety by the ropes course, fire lighting and containment by the fire ring, arts and crafts in the lodge, basic wound care at the health center, and CPR and Heimlich Maneuver here in the mess hall.”
A last minute crash course in all things summer camp. Thank God I already knew CPR, first aid, and the Heimlich. I didn’t think I’d be able to learn those with any skill at all in a quick round-robin rotation. The others had worked here before, so they probably already knew everything, too.
“Sarah, Analise, and Ian, you’re group one. Here’s your schedule,” Dean Purty said, handing Sarah a slip of paper. “Micah, Lars, Miranda, and Naveen, you’re group two.”
That left me and True, who smiled at me as she realized the same thing. We were bumping knuckles as the dean spoke up again.
“That leaves True, Piper… and Levi.”
As the words left his mouth, the screen door flew open. Levi breezed in, and the air whooshed out of my lungs. He stalked toward Dean Purty, snatched the schedule from his hand, and slammed onto a bench at the far end of the table from me and True.
He didn’t look happy. Actually, he looked extremely pissed.
But he was here. He hadn’t left, and something inside me snapped, releasing a boulder that I hadn’t realized was weighing me down.
“Oh,” True whispered, leaning in close with a mischievous grin, “this is going to be so much fun.”
Levi’s eyes flicked toward her and narrowed as his frown deepened. Had he heard what she said? No. There was no way. He was sitting at the far end of the long table, and she’d whispered the words into my ear.
With my next heartbeat, Levi’s face smoothed out. He slumped over, propping his elbows on the table, his face blank like he didn’t have a care in the world. I watched him as Dean Purty finished calling out instructions, his lazy posture and air of nonchalance suddenly getting on my last nerve.
I was tired of this wishy-washy act he was putting on—one day caring for my safety and the next acting like he couldn’t stand to breathe the same air as me. I was done doubting myself and my worth. Done fearing that he’d leave, and I’d never know why.
He wasn’t going anywhere. That much was obvious. And I deserved to be treated like a real person with real feelings.
I’d kicked a bully in the balls to stand up for a girl I barely knew. It was time to put that effort into standing up for myself.
True was right. This was going to be fun.
Chapter Twelve
I glanced down at the paper schedule in my hand and winced. Boating safety, fire starting and wound care? Not to mention tightening climbing
harnesses around sweaty children and shoveling animal waste.
How bad did I want to keep this job again?
I turned my gaze to True as we walked to our first station, which happened to be the barn. She rolled her eyes in solidarity, but I knew she was giddy with the thought of me and Levi in the same group together. Oh, the drama.
I was decidedly not giddy. As we walked, I reminded myself I was done taking his dirty looks and nasty sneers. Bubbly Piper hadn’t worked, so today he was going to get Badass Piper. We’d see how he liked that for a change.
Casually, I watched as he headed up the path. Despite his size, he moved gracefully with long strides that made it hard for us to keep up. Or maybe that was on purpose. He hadn’t been too happy when we’d been paired together.
And why had the dean decided we should be thrust together? It was like he was testing him, putting him with the person he liked the least to see if he could handle it, but why? Was he being punished for something? Were they feeling him out to see if he would break?
And what would happen if he did?
I squared my shoulders and reminded myself that Badass Piper was in residence and she could handle it, no matter what.
I smelled the barnyard before I saw it. The day was another scorcher, already eighty degrees by nine-thirty a.m., and the heat only accentuated the smell of animal waste wafting from the stalls.
As we approached the big red barn, a slim creature stepped out, holding three shovels. He wore dirty overalls, a wife-beater, and a bandana over his nose and mouth, leaving only his beady eyes for me to scrutinize. They did not look friendly.
“That’s Harris, the farm hand I mentioned,” True whispered. “He doesn’t say much.”
She was right. Without a word, he passed out shovels and disappeared.
“How did we get picked as the lucky ones to get barn duty first?” I asked. It seemed immensely unfair we were asked to clean the barn while others would rotate in later to sparkling stables.
“Luck of the draw, I guess.” True rolled her eyes and showed me around, pointing out the animals I’d already seen before adding a chicken coop in the back, some goats in a side pasture, and then the riding gear. While we toured and went over the rules regarding campers and the animals, the sound of a shovel scraping against the ground continued in the background. And by the time we got back to the stables, Levi had quietly cleared all of the manure for us.
As he picked up a pitch fork and tackled a hay bale, I watched, unable to help myself. He worked doggedly without tiring. His strong muscles flexed beneath his plain black T-shirt, and his eyes remained fixed on his work. With his mind on the task, his face lost its anger and frustration, the lines smoothing out until he looked almost peaceful.
And so handsome, it hurt.
Badass Piper doesn’t care about how hot Levi is. Levi is a jerk, remember?
I shook away the unwanted thoughts as Levi finished up.
“Hey, thanks, man,” True said, leaning against a stall, a blade of hay between her teeth. “We could’ve helped you with the dirty work.”
He shrugged, seeming uncomfortable with the gratitude. “You can fill the water buckets before we go.” He gestured to a spigot and a pile of black buckets.
While True and I got to work rinsing and filling the buckets, Levi stepped out of the barn and disappeared. When I walked out with two of the buckets, I caught a glimpse of him in a slice of shade. He’d removed his sweaty T-shirt and was washing himself down with a hose. The water ran over his shoulders and down his muscular back. As I watched, he let the water flow through his hair and over his face, his eyes closed as he enjoyed the sensation.
It was sexy as hell and also made me wonder if he was happiest alone, doing the hard work no one else wanted to do.
True bumped me on her way past, her brow waggle letting me know she’d seen my appreciative stare. I shrugged my shoulders and mouthed What? while she laughed silently and rolled her eyes. At least she had enough discretion to avoid embarrassing me in front of Levi.
I was doing a bang-up job of that myself.
With the dirty work complete—or as complete as Harris wanted it—True talked me through the horse harnesses and tack, explaining that they had a professional on staff so I didn’t need to be an expert. While I petted a few mares, Levi wandered over, rubbing a gentle hand down a horse’s neck. The mare leaned thankfully into his touch.
Good with animals, too? If I didn’t know he was a douche, he’d be the perfect guy.
Our rotation ended, and we walked to our next assigned station—CPR and first aid.
Damn, this was going to be awkward.
The nurse’s station was a small, one-story cabin with white siding, blue shutters, and a brown shingled roof. Somehow, it didn’t match the woodsy aesthetic of the other buildings, making me wonder if this building was newer or older than the others.
Unfortunately, I’d been here before when I’d passed out, so I didn’t need a tour or to be introduced to the camp’s nurse, Barbara. Nurse Barbara had to be in her sixties, but was still quite attractive by any standard, fitting in nicely with the other catalogue models that worked here. She was prim and petite, with chin-length white blonde hair, a tiny voice, and cold fingers. I’d had the pleasure of having them prod me the other day.
Determined to prove to myself and everyone else that I was completely fine, I was the first to volunteer to use the CPR dummy. Placing the plastic torso on the wood floor, I ran over the procedure in my head. I’d been trained only a few months before at my local recreation department and had gotten praise from my instructor.
So, with a deep breath, I knelt beside the “victim” and began.
Performing the compressions and breaths, I ignored the prickly feeling of being watched. When I’d completed a whole cycle, I met the eyes of Nurse Barbara, True, and Levi.
He looked far less comfortable here. Sitting stiffly on the bench by the wall, his hands were clenched into fists, and his jaw was locked. When our eyes met, his darted away, and his scowl deepened.
Flush with indignation, I said the first thing that came to my mind. “Levi should go next.”
His eyes shot back to me, narrowing with anger.
This time, I glared right back.
“Good idea. Levi, let’s see if you remember what you’re doing. Piper certainly did.” Nurse Barbara gestured Levi toward the dummy.
He got up, tugging on his clothes as if he were suddenly uncomfortable, despite the cool breeze of the air conditioner. When he knelt beside the dummy, he dwarfed it by comparison, reminding me once again of his size. He took his time scrubbing the face with an alcohol wipe like I carried the bubonic plague or something.
Part of me wanted to see him screw up and get chastised by Nurse Barbara, but the CPR was flawless. Of course it was. Mr. Perfect strikes again.
After True completed her CPR, Nurse Barbara brought out a large plastic kit with a large red cross on the front. “After hydration and making sure campers keep their shoes on, sprains and small cuts are the biggest complaints seen here at the nurse’s station. You can help with minor first aid by learning how to wrap joints and safely administer a Band-Aid.”
She handed out latex gloves, bandages, and elastic wrap. “Who wants to go first?”
My hand shot up. Badass Piper really was a go-getter.
“Fine. Camper Levi has a sprained wrist. Please show us how it’s done.”
My head buzzed. Me. Touching Levi.
It was fine. I could do this. I smoothed out my face and approached him like it was the most common thing in the world.
I sat on the bench beside him and smiled gently. “I hear you’re hurt. Can I see your hand, please?”
Cautiously, his arm extended. I took his hand in mine, ignoring the tingle that fluttered like butterflies in my stomach the moment our skin touched.
I gently turned it over until his palm was facing up. I expected callouses on a hand so well used, but his skin was smooth an
d soft. Getting distracted, I pretended this was a scared, injured camper who needed my help instead of the guy who made my heart race like a thoroughbred any time he was near.
“It’s going to be okay,” I murmured, keeping the hand steady while reaching for the bandage behind me. I kept talking in soothing tones as I placed his upturned hand on my knee and unwound the bandage. I kept up the reassurance as I twisted the bandage around his wrist, finally fastening it.
“There,” I said. “All better.” I smiled at a job well done and let my eyes travel up to the recipient.
Levi’s expression was one I’d never seen him wear before. His dark eyebrows were up, his gray-green eyes wide as if I’d surprised him in a way that pleased him instead of repulsed him.
He almost smiled at me.
Then a voice cut through the moment.
“Very nice,” Nurse Barbara said behind me. “You have a way with a patient, Piper. He is thoroughly comforted.”
Yet, her voice had an underlying tone that didn’t seem to match her words. When I glanced back, her gaze was locked on Levi, hard and disapproving.
He pulled his hand back, cradling it against his chest like it really was injured. His eyes went to it like it had betrayed him.
God, why did I never understand what was happening here?!
“Thank you, ladies,” Nurse Barbara said. “You’ve done well.”
“But I didn’t go,” True said, lifting her hand to volunteer.
“You were here last year. I assure you, it’s fine. You can head to lunch early.” She got up, ushering us to the door.
“But what about Levi?” True asked, glancing over Barbara’s shoulder.
“He’ll be along shortly. I need him to help me with something.” Her smile was tight, and her posture said there would be no discussion. She hustled us to the door and closed it, leaving us alone on the porch.
“What the hell was that?” True whispered, glancing at the door.
“She acted like he did something wrong.”
True put her hand on her hip and cocked her head. “All he did was appreciate your attention.”