by Heather Boyd
Lenore remembered seeing no scar upon him the one and only night he’d come to her bed. However, at the time, she’d had other things on her mind than looking for imperfections.
She still thought of their night together when alone, too, but it was with a trace of regret now for what might have been.
Aside from her husband’s continued absence, her days were uncomplicated. Settled in a way she’d never expected to be in her life. She had made some new acquaintances through the Hillcrest Academy but they were not of the ton, not from the same circles her husband moved in. Unfortunately, most were male clients, but some were women, newly married like her and eager to make valuable connections.
She was expecting her first caller later today for luncheon.
Hero had been bathed again and Lenore dressed with particular care for her new station in life, choosing to wear one of Madam Du Clair’s more modest creations. When the pretty new gowns she’d ordered from Madam had arrived, Lenore had put most away in wait for next season. What was the point of dressing seductively if her husband could hardly stand to be near her?
Today, she was wearing a simple cream muslin day gown embroidered with tiny blue stars all over. There wasn’t a ribbon or awful flounce to be seen anywhere about her.
She primped her hair in the mirror, added a pair of tiny pearl earbobs she’d bought for herself, and smiled. She was ready to face whatever came her way today.
Despite the loneliness she sometimes felt, this marriage suited her very well. There was nothing better than choosing your own destiny or your wardrobe.
She dismissed her maid and departed her chambers, casting a brief glance at her husband’s closed bedchamber door as she went by. She’d never ventured inside that room. That was her husband’s private domain. That and his study, she felt, were off-limits to her.
The rest of the house was hers, and she simply adored adding personal touches to each room. Soon she would depart for their country estate, Edenmere Park, with or without her husband. She was going to take herself home and lay flowers on her grandmother’s grave.
Carmichael hadn’t mentioned when he would leave London, but Lenore felt she shouldn’t have to wait for him to decide. Like many tonnish wives must, she considered her own feelings in the matter of her amusements. Perhaps she’d spend all of the winter in the countryside. Maybe she could even persuade the Hillcrest women to join her for a month or two. Sylvia mentioned her worries about their finances for the coming winter from time to time, though she’d refused Lenore’s offer of charity or otherwise making an investment in their enterprise.
She let her fingers trail down the recently polished oak banister railing as she descended to the lower floor, enjoying the lingering odor of beeswax. The black and white entrance tiles gleamed brightly this morning, and the butler appeared as soon as her first steps on the tile sounded through the house with her dog leashed at his side.
“Good morning, my lady,”
“Good morning, Humphries,” she said with a serene smile. Lenore and Humphries and Mrs. Baker got along very well. They knew her origins were humble, had known her grandmother by reputation, too, though they sometimes gently rebuked her when she forgot she was supposed to be the lady of the house and not the maid.
Hero panted enthusiastically. She held out her hand to the dog, and he came closer to lick her bare fingers. “Morning, my dear Hero,” she said with a soft laugh as his tail began to wag quite fast. “Have you been a good boy?” She glanced up at the butler quickly. “I trust he was no trouble?”
“None at all, my lady. Lord Carmichael took him out for his run himself earlier, and he’s been in the kitchen ever since.”
“Well, that explains why he didn’t return to me,” she said wryly, putting her hands on her hips. She wasn’t commenting on her husband but on her hound’s absence. The dog had quickly realized where his best chance for a full stomach was, and had spread his attention about to all under this roof. “The prospect of food has ever been Hero’s weakness.”
The butler nodded as if he knew it already. “Cook has been warned not to spoil him and let him become fat.”
“And he would if he could.” She gave her dog a vigorous rub, wondering if she had time to take him outside again. However, she wanted to be sure everything was well in hand for her luncheon and took the leash from the man. “I appreciate your help with him. My last employer’s cook had to keep being reminded not to overfeed him all the table scraps, and the footmen were no help at all.”
“I shall keep a firm grip on the situation,” Humphries promised with a grin. “I have placed today’s letters to you on the drawing room writing table.”
Lenore lit up with excitement. She’d always loved receiving mail. “Thank you,” she murmured before she hurried to that room, taking Hero with her. Once in the room, she shut the door for privacy and let Hero off the leash. He immediately leaped onto a chair to watch her with his usual devotion.
There were a pair of letters, one of them from the lady meant to be joining her for luncheon today. Lenore ripped it open first. The lady apologized but had to cry off. Her mother-in-law had arrived unexpectedly and intended to stay for a few days. She did not want to impose by bringing the lady with her, too. Lenore was disappointed but completely understood. She penned a quick response and set it aside.
The second letter was from Lady Kelly. Carmichael must have sent his own man to deliver his message to have a response so quickly returned. Lenore wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to read it, but she pried off the seal and flattened the pages on the desk.
Lady Kelly proposed a meeting later that day in Green Park, where they could talk in private away from her husband. She had come up to London immediately on receiving his letter, determined to make sense of Lenore’s actions and the unexpected marriage.
Lenore didn’t like the idea of having to explain herself to the woman, or of meeting her in private, either.
But as she read Lady Kelly’s letter again, she thought perhaps she could meet with her here instead. Set the record straight, and ensure the woman aired no grievances in a public park. Lenore had left her employment without warning, and that had been rude. However, given the alternative had been staying and having Lord Thorne make trouble for her, attempt to seduce her, she would still have run away to somewhere else.
Lady Kelly should know the truth from her own lips and decide whether to act on her warning or not in the future.
At a knock on the door, Lenore quickly put her correspondence in a drawer. “Come in,” she called.
Humphries hurried to her side. “Forgive the intrusion, but Lord Carmichael has callers and is nowhere to be found. They’ve asked if they might speak with you, instead.”
“Who are they?”
“It is Lord and Lady Wade.”
Lenore frowned. The pair had attended her wedding, but she’d not known of them calling on her husband since then. He had spoken with Lady Wade at some dinner somewhere recently, though.
“I see,” Lenore murmured, but she was uncertain if she should talk to them. She’d rather not hear from Lady Wade that she had spoken to her husband again, but it seemed uncivil to avoid them for that reason. “Do show them in.”
Humphries was quick about it and brought the smiling pair into the drawing room to meet her.
Lord Wade bowed deeply. “I do hope you will forgive our impertinence for dropping by without waiting for an invitation. I’ve called before to visit your husband and found he’s never been at home.”
She winced inwardly. So her husband wasn’t spending time with the Wades when he wasn’t here. “Yes, he is a very busy man.”
The husband and wife exchanged a glance. “I suppose he must be,” Lady Wade murmured with a nervous smile.
“Please, let us not stand on ceremony.” She gestured them toward chairs. “Would you care for tea?”
“That would be lovely, thank you,” Lady Wade said quickly.
Lenore requested it and then cast her
eye over her unexpected guests. They were people of means, obviously. Lady Wade, a beauty, and Lord Wade, well…he appeared intelligent and inquisitive as he looked about the drawing room. She cleared her throat. “I haven’t had a chance to meet many of my husband’s friends yet.”
“Yes, so we’ve noticed,” Lord Wade murmured. “I’ve actually been trying to catch him for some weeks now to discuss that very thing.”
“Have you?”
“Merely the concern of a friend wishing to know he is well, I swear,” Lord Wade murmured, eyes again flickering about the room then shifting to study her carefully.
His inspection made her uncomfortable. “I will let my husband know you wish to speak with him as soon as I see him.”
Though she did not mention it might not be that day.
Lord Wade sighed. “It goes against the grain to dissemble, and so I will not. I must admit that our reason for coming here today was to satisfy our curiosity about your sudden marriage.”
“Not that we don’t think it’s not the most wonderful news that Lord Carmichael has married a lovely lady,” Lady Wade hastened to explain. “He is such a dear man, and we have worried about his welfare for several months.”
“You have no reason to worry about him. I’m no impediment to his happiness, I assure you.” She smiled at the couple, wondering how good a friend this pair really was to her husband if he was avoiding them. The wrong word to pretenders could cause the worst sort of gossip. Did they suspect she’d entrapped him? Taken advantage somehow? There was no way to explain how she came to be married to the earl that wouldn’t be breaking her promise to him. How this marriage came about was private. How it went on was undoubtedly bound to be remarked upon.
Lenore would prefer to avoid any unpleasantness if his friends disapproved of her. “If you have concerns about my husband, I suggest you discuss the matter directly with him.”
“I would if I could find him. Carmichael and I are both members of White’s Club, though I have not seen him there for some time,” Lord Wade told her.
That startled her. Her husband had gone out every night since her arrival in London, returning sometime in the early hours of the morning. She had assumed he’d probably gone to the club and met with friends. If Carmichael had been avoiding his own club, he must be going somewhere else at night. And he wasn’t taking this particular friend with him, either. Perhaps he kept company with Lord Wharton more often now.
“It’s not like him to be so elusive.” Lady Wade sighed. “I first met Carmichael when I made my come out. He quite dazzled then. He was top of every ladies’ list to dance with until…”
Lady Wade fell silent, looking at a loss for words now. So this pair knew about the murders, perhaps the victims, too? Did they blame Carmichael the same way Lady Berry had? “I have heard, of course, of the tragedy, and know of my husband’s long connection to the murderess.”
Lady Wade nodded. “I was acquainted with all of Lady Scott’s victims, of course. Many came out the same year I did.”
“You lost friends?”
“Yes and no. You know how it can be among unmarried ladies sometimes. We’re all vying for the same gentleman’s attentions half the time and conspiring to make each other appear less worthy. Hoping to be noticed and singled out and married quickly.” Lady Wade gazed adoringly at her husband. “That all changes when the right man comes along, of course. They become all we desire, and we forget all those little insecurities that once meant success or failure in society. I’m sure you’ve noticed your ambitions changed upon marriage.”
“Of course.” Lenore lifted her chin. She had never been that ambitious about finding herself a husband. Employment and a fair salary had been her goal all her life. Although she hated to pretend she had captured her husband’s heart upon marriage, she would from now on. Lenore had his name, his title, and she would protect their reputation and avoid gossip spreading about them.
Lenore had been unprepared when confronted by Lady Berry, but it had been clear the woman though her unworthy of marrying Lord Carmichael. Lady Berry hadn’t returned, but Lenore didn’t think that was the last she’d seen of her. Perhaps this pair could provide her with information to use during their next encounter. “I wonder, do you know Lady Berry, by any chance?”
“We are acquainted,” Lord Wade admitted. “Why do you ask?”
“Lady Berry came here not so long ago, very angry with my husband. I have not seen her since, but I do worry about her health. It must be terrible to lose someone you love, especially a daughter fully grown.”
“I did know her daughter,” Lady Wade confirmed. “Though not as well as some people I could mention.”
Lord Wade took up his wife’s hand. “She was well-liked by everyone. She had a very bubbly personality and was much in demand as a dance partner.”
“Much like my husband must have been for you, Lady Wade,” Lenore noted. “I never had the honor to meet her myself.”
Lady Wade glanced at her husband, who shook his head. The lady smiled quickly. “Lord Wade and I have only recently married, just like you and Carmichael.”
Lenore smiled. “Congratulations.”
“Three months wed.”
Lord Wade smiled at his wife fondly. “I faced stiff competition for her hand in marriage. I freely admit I was not her first choice, but hopefully, she’ll still be happy when we’re old and gray.”
Lenore’s smile felt frozen in place at the realization she was sitting across from an actual love-matched couple. Dear God. They must think Carmichael could love her, too. Lenore really had nothing in common with this pair.
She felt the acute need to send them away immediately. Carmichael could barely spend much more than five minutes in her company, and anyone watching them too closely might come to see that, she suspected. “Well, it was lovely to have met friends of my husband again. I will pass along your hope to see him soon.”
She hoped not to see them again too soon.
She stood, and the pair did as well.
Lord Wade frowned. “Before we go, I should like to be blunt.”
“I thought you were already,” she blurted out, and then winced.
Lord Wade’s lips quirked. “Please do not misconstrue our reasons for wishing to speak to you and your husband today. We really are both delighted Carmichael has married. He took the betrayal of his godmother to heart, and the murders…well, I knew he held himself responsible for those long before many realized. For many months, Lord Carmichael has been a ghost, hardly seen but sorely missed. It was painful to witness his grief, but his withdrawal from polite society only makes matters worse. People are talking about him, and not favorably, I fear. However, now he has married you; we both hope the gossips will move on to others. We feel certain he’s put the past behind him at last and is making a fresh start.”
“I’m sure he is,” Lenore murmured, but wondered if that could ever be true. He was a ghost for her as well. At least she wasn’t the only one he ignored. “Thank you for your honesty.”
Yes, there was a sadness in him that she’d noticed and accepted. What else could she do but ignore the lost look in his eye? He didn’t confide in her. Lenore hadn’t chased away his feelings of betrayal and grief. He’d made a choice to marry when he’d been deep in his cups, chosen her because…well, she still did not really know why he’d picked her when he could have married just about anyone. He could have married for love. “I’ll tell my husband you called as soon as he comes home.”
The pair thanked her and turned away.
As she watched Lord and Lady Wade stroll from the room arm in arm, and finally step out of sight, she sighed deeply.
The continued distance between her and Carmichael was a ridiculous situation since it was his idea to marry in the first place. Lenore might have given up employment that would have become untenable, but was this situation, her unhappiness here, a better alternative? She didn’t want to be a forgotten wife. She intended to become no shrew, either, that
he couldn’t talk to or trust with his private regrets.
She deserved to be his equal, and she wanted to be his confidant, too.
She needed him to be her guide in this new life they were making together. Her companion and lover, too, if she was to have her wish for children fulfilled. She was lonely in this big house all by herself.
With her luncheon with a friend now canceled, there was a kitchen full of food that would only spoil before tomorrow.
Lenore returned to her writing desk and pulled out a sheet of paper. She wrote a brief letter to her husband, politely announcing that his company was required at home for dinner that night.
Let him ignore that, and she’d know where they stood.
Tonight she would confront her husband about his life, his friendships, his comings and goings. She’d figure out where she really could belong in his life, if anywhere, and if he wanted to be part of her life, too. If he did not, she’d stop waiting for him to come back to her bed of his own volition and make a schedule for that facet of their marriage.
She wanted her husband back in her bed tonight, and every night, until she carried the child he’d promised her.
Chapter 16
“Another drink?” Lord Wharton asked late in the afternoon.
“No, thanks,” Price murmured, nudging his empty glass a little farther out of his reach. They were sitting in Wharton’s study, going over an investment opportunity making the rounds. Price had already made his decision not to invest but Wharton was on the fence.
“Suit yourself,” his host replied with a shrug before picking up the sheaf of papers he’d just been reading. “So what do you think?”
Price glanced at his copy of the documents. “What do you think?”
Wharton grimaced. “There’s just something about the deal that feels a little off to me.”
“Then don’t invest. I’m not. It’s not as if you need the extra income.”
“True,” Wharton agreed then tossed the paper aside. “I’ll look into that mill closer to home.”