He stretched. His bones popped, relieving some of the pressure. Lotus moved in front of him and placed a hand on his chest.
“Stay with us,” she said.
“Just days ago, you were encouraging me to spend more time with my mate,” he reminded her. He watched her face carefully, noting the corners of her mouth as they tightened. “Speak plainly, Lotus. I am growing tired of this.”
Bluntly, she said, “That was necessary. Now, things will be easier for everyone involved if you maintain your distance.”
He contemplated her words. Behind the obvious jealousy lay an unsettling truth. As he was not sure he would always want to be loyal to his mate, they could avoid future complications if he simply stopped sharing her bed now. Unfortunately, Caim was far too selfish for that.
“I will take that into consideration,” he told her and removed her hand from his chest. He brushed past her and headed down from the dais. Wisely, Sable made no move to stop him.
He knew he had hurt Lotus and would, undoubtedly, continue to hurt her. He was not so pitiless that it did not bother him. Much like Asch and Sable, Lotus would always be an important part of his past.
But Mila, and the pups they would have together, were his future.
3
Mila had forgotten just how creepy the cavernous passageways were. Even in the daylight, they were just a step above pitch black, and there was always the sound of something dripping in the distance, even though she’d never seen any water. Eeriest of all was the draft that swept through the tunnel. Sometimes, it sounded like an echoed voice, other times, it was a far-off wailing. Right now, it sounded like footsteps.
She wrapped her arms around her chest and shuffled down the passageway as quickly as she could without tripping over her feet. The hairs on the back of her neck stood at attention as the sound grew closer. Her anxiety spiking, she turned on her heel and stared back into the void.
“Who’s there?” she called out, her voice cracking.
“A predator is not going to announce itself to you.”
Caim. The tension melted from her body, and her posture sagged in relief.
“I know that,” she told him as he took shape in the darkness. “There aren’t any predators in the den. I was just asking a question, that’s all.”
She sucked in a sharp breath as he immediately pulled her into his arms. Her stomach flipped at the feel of his warm flesh encasing her chilled body. When she caught his familiar, earthy scent, Mila felt a rush of emotion that threatened to engulf her. She hadn’t realized how badly she needed him. It wasn’t just a sexual need, it was beyond that, and the realization scared the hell out of her.
“I can smell your fear,” he said dryly.
Mila didn’t feel like arguing the point. She snaked her arms around his waist, pressing herself closer against his firm body. There was so much she wanted to be upset with him about, but she was weak, and it would have to wait.
He didn’t try to pry her off, and she was grateful for that. “What are you doing wandering around on your own?” he asked.
“Last I checked, I didn’t need an escort to my room.” Her snark lost its bite as she rubbed the side of her face against his chest.
“We will go to my room,” he announced before he scooped her up into his arms. He was such a caveman, and yet she’d never met a man who could make her feel so feminine.
She took the opportunity to rest her head in the crook of his neck as he carried her. After a few moments of silence, she found herself asking, “Are you still mad at me?”
“Yes.”
“Really mad?”
“No.”
“I’m mad at you, too, you know,” she told him as they entered his chamber.
Afternoon sunlight filtered in from the fissure in the ceiling, illuminating the room in sharp panels of light. Caim carried her over to a shaded corner and set her down gently on a pallet of furs.
“And what do you have to be angry about?” he asked, kneeling down in front of her. He grabbed one of the pelts and gave it a few shakes before draping it over her shoulders.
Up close, Mila could see where Asch’s fist had collided with his nose earlier that morning. She winced, taking in the dark bruising and broken blood vessels.
“That’s my fault,” she said, her brows drawing together. His lips flattened.
“Yes, it is.” Lying down on the pallet, he settled beside her and propped his head up with his arm. Giving her a meaningful look, he said, “It was mine as well.”
Mila lay next to him, mimicking his position. “I’m all for letting you take the blame, but I don’t see how me wandering off like a moron was your fault.”
“I was responsible for you.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’m an adult, Caim. I’m responsible for my own actions, however stupid they may be.”
“You are my mate,” he stubbornly replied. “I am responsible for your safety.”
Mila reached out and placed a hand on his jaw. “Fair enough,” she said, running her thumb across his hard cheekbone. She didn’t really agree with him, but she sort of understood his perspective, and with Caim, that was about as far as she usually got anyway.
He grunted and hooked an arm around her waist, turning her body so that her back was against his chest. He was uncharacteristically careful with her, and when he rested his hand over her abdomen, she remembered why. She tilted her head back to look at him.
“Do you want to be a father?”
It had occurred to her that while she knew Asch was eager to be a parent, she’d never asked Caim’s feelings on the matter. If she was pregnant, there was just as much of a chance that the baby would be Caim’s.
He returned her gaze, his own eyes heavy-lidded. “It will be something to do.”
Mila made a face. “Something to do? It’s a huge responsibility.”
Caim gave a half-hearted shrug. “I have been responsible for the well-being of others for most of my life. I doubt it will be much different.”
“It’s way different than just being in charge of a pack of wolves. Babies are like, tiny, helpless little creatures who are totally reliant on their parents for everything. You have to remember to feed them and you can’t drop them, and if you make one mistake, you can screw them up for the rest of their lives.”
God, how scary.
Caim did not look impressed by her rant. “Do not project your own feelings of inadequacy on me.”
She fought the urge to roll her eyes. “Whatever, tough guy. You’ll see for yourself.”
He looked satisfied, as if he’d actually won the argument. Mila faced away but scooted herself closer to him. Despite the vast difference in their sizes and builds, their bodies always fit together so perfectly.
Caim slipped a hand under her shirt, his warm hand cupping her bare stomach. She asked, “Do you want me to get undressed?”
“No,” he replied, his voice thick with sleep. “I will need to mate with you if you do.”
Despite everything they’d been through in the past two weeks, Caim could still make her blush. She considered tempting him, but ultimately decided against it. She was exhausted and in dire need of a good day’s sleep.
4
Another week passed in the pack, this one surprisingly easier than the ones that had come before. Mila still missed Asch a lot, but there was none of the drama she’d grown so accustomed to.
By night, she and Caim did their own things. Most of his time was devoted to hunting and other activities outside the den. He spent his mornings on the dais with Lotus and Sable, occasionally mediating between wolves who were brave enough to approach him with their problems. Although she never caught him doing it, she knew he must be watching her. As soon as she yawned or her eyes drooped, he would appear at her side and lead her away from the cavern and into his chamber.
The only thing that had really frustrated her throughout the week was Caim’s stubbornness about doing anything besides actually sleep with her. The evening
after their first day of rest together, Mila had awoken to Caim’s very large, very demanding erection pressed against her backside. As it always did, her body had responded to his immediately, and they’d both been eager to slake their desire.
When he had roughly grabbed her hips, preparing to position her for his entrance, Mila had cried out—not in pleasure. She had managed to alarm him into stopping, and despite her efforts to downplay the situation, he’d given her a thorough examination. Even in the low light, his keen eyes had been able to pick up the bruises and scratches that still covered her hips—remnants of the aggressive sex they’d shared during the thrall.
In general, both alphas enjoyed marking her in one way or another. Caim would often suck on the delicate skin of her breasts, leaving rosy bruises in his wake. Although typically more reserved, Asch would frequently bite her neck when he came, sometimes even breaking the skin. For whatever reason, though, Caim was not happy about the bruising.
“Are you in pain?” he had asked, looking thoroughly displeased. Mila had been displeased as well, though for a quite different reason.
“No, I just wasn’t expecting it,” she’d said and tugged on his arm. “Just ignore it and keep going, please?”
He had folded his arms across his chest and raised his chin. “We will wait until you are well to resume this.”
That had been days ago, and she was well now. The scratches had healed and the bruises had mostly faded. But Caim still refused to have sex with her. What was worse was that she started to think he was denying her sex for fun.
“What makes you think that?” Rosie asked and waded over to lean against a rock.
It was just before dawn, and Mila was confiding her suspicions to Rosie and Gem as they bathed in the river. “They” meaning the two wolves, as Mila was not about to get anywhere near the freezing water until summertime. She took her baths inside now, though she still followed her friends outside for their nightly baths. Without much else to do, socializing was her only real pastime.
Mila looked around to make sure they were alone. Some evenings, the other females came to the river to bathe as well, though they usually kept their distance. She often spoke candidly about the alphas with her friends, but it seemed weird to talk about their personal lives around the rest of the pack, especially in Caim’s case, as he went out of his way to distance himself from the other wolves.
Confident they were alone, she said, “Well, for starters, he’s always breathing on the back of my neck.”
Gem laughed. “What’s that got to do with anything?”
“I dunno,” Mila said, fiddling with a stone on the riverbank. “It’s just one of those things that does it for me. He knows it, I know he does.”
Every day when they went to sleep, Caim would tuck his head behind hers, angling it just right so that his hot breath teased the hairs on the nape of her neck.
“He never used to sleep with his mouth open,” she continued. “And he’s always groping me in his ‘sleep’ and every night, when he wakes up, he has this way that he stretches that—” Mila stopped talking and glowered at Gem and Rosie, who were both laughing. After a moment, she joined them, unable to help herself.
Many things weighed more heavily on her than Caim’s antics, but she wasn’t ready to talk about them. Maybe if Brae hadn’t left …
Gem rose from the river and squeezed the water from her dark hair as she came ashore. She smiled at Mila, revealing two sets of perfectly straight teeth. “Ready to go inside?”
Mila rubbed her stiff hands together. She was cold, but it was nice to get away from the den for a little while. The light blanket of snow that had fallen the week before had long since melted, but the temperature continued to drop every day. She hadn’t packed anything heavier than a jacket, so unless she wanted to lug around one of the heavy pelts, she was probably going to spend the next few months holed up in the den.
“Nah, let’s enjoy the weather while we can,” she told Gem.
She tilted her head back and closed her eyes, pretending to soak in the weak morning sunlight. She heard Gem sit down next to her on the rocky bank. Glancing over at her, she marveled at how unbothered the younger woman was by the cold. It had to be below freezing and there wasn’t a single goose bump on her peach-colored skin.
“Do you miss your family?” Gem asked.
Mila realized that as much as they usually talked about her past, none of the wolves had ever asked her that. “Sometimes, I guess. My cousin was a total goofball, and my aunt and uncle were pretty nice.”
“What about your parents?”
Mila looked down at her nails. “Yeah, I guess,” she lied. Trying her best not to sound testy, she asked, “Why are you even asking about all this stuff?”
Gem shrugged. “I dunno. I was just thinking that you must be lonely out here, being so far from home without your mama and daddy.”
“I’ve always been fine on my own,” she said. “How ’bout you? Do you miss your parents?”
Mila instantly regretted the question. In her desperation to change the subject, she’d forgotten one of the things she had learned in her short time with the wolves: they did not like talking about their parents.
To her relief, Gem didn’t look upset. “No, my mama was as mean as a rattlesnake. When I turned sixteen, I couldn’t get out of Appomattox fast enough.”
“How the heck did you end up here?”
“I didn’t end up here, not right away,” she said. “I was in Blackthorn for a couple years. Their alpha was a very good man, but he was real old. Once he died and his son took over, I asked Asch if I could come join Lazarus.”
“Was his son a bad leader?” Mila asked as her curiosity piqued.
“It’s hard to explain,” Gem said, scratching her chin.
“Our alpha males are almost always the most powerful male in the pack,” Rosie said, coming ashore. She flung her matted hair behind her head before coming to sit next to them. “When the alpha dies, the mantle of leadership passes to the next strongest male. That is what should have happened in Blackthorn.”
Gem elaborated, “The alpha’s son, Talon, he isn’t a bad man. He’s just not strong enough to be a leader.”
“I guess I understand,” Mila said. She realized there was still so much she didn’t know about werewolves, particularly, how their packs functioned. “It just seems a bit primitive, you know?”
“I suppose,” Rosie said and stretched her legs out. “But our world is different. We need powerful leaders. Otherwise, our enemies would kill us all and take our territory.”
“I see,” Mila said, feeling a little queasy.
Gem put a cool hand on her shoulder. “Don’t worry about that,” she said. “Our territory is safe. No one would ever be dumb enough to challenge us.”
Mila nodded absently, looking out over the water. She couldn’t help but think about the cat that had nearly made a meal of her the week before. Everyone kept telling her the territory was “safe,” but she was starting to realize that they had a much looser definition of the word than she did.
5
Night came quickly in the wintertime, setting in well before Mila and the rest of the pack awoke for the evening. The air grew colder, and on the nights that it snowed, she and Caim would sleep in her bedroom. He’d had tanned animal hides hung over her window to shelter them from the bad weather, but the cold always managed to find its way in.
During the short days, she dreamed of lying between Asch and Caim. She always faced Asch, and when she awoke, he would be right there, the last vestiges of sunlight illuminating his bronze skin and highlighting his coppery hair. His hazel eyes would stare deeply into hers, and he would give her the slow, lazy smile that always gave her butterflies.
And then, she would wake to darkness and a sharp pang of sadness. She missed Asch and craved his touch and his affection—affection he’d always given her so freely. Now that she’d spent so much time with Caim, she realized how much she’d taken that for gra
nted.
Caim definitely seemed to care for her in his own way, but he lacked Asch’s intuitive ability to understand her needs. She had tried several times to talk to him about her concern for Asch and her fear that she wouldn’t be able to get pregnant. Rather than consoling her, or even simply holding her, Caim would tell her to “stop worrying needlessly,” usually before rolling over and going back to sleep. As if it was that easy.
Her big caveman was not without his merits, though. He slept by her side every night, and if she so much as twitched from the cold, he would gather her up in his muscular arms and tuck her tightly against him, his warm body keeping the cold at bay. Though he couldn’t soothe her sadness when she woke, he did know how to make her feel desired. Under the ministrations of his calloused hands kneading her breasts and the feeling of his straining erection flexing against her backside, she would forget all of her worries, if only for a little while.
On this evening in particular, Mila woke to the feeling of Caim’s hot breath teasing the hairs on the nape of her neck. His lips brushed against the sensitive skin. The subtle caress sent arrows of pleasure down her spine. Involuntarily, she arched herself into him, nearly moaning at the feeling of him hard and ready for her.
Caim had never been what she would call sensual. He was a man who knew what he wanted and took it with very little in between—or at least he had been. When he’d seen her injuries the week before, Mila knew they had genuinely concerned him, and he’d been right to give her a break for a few days, no matter how much that had annoyed her. She suspected that during the few days he had to lie beside her, touching and feeling her but being unable to take her, he’d realized how much fun it could be to play.
He was torturing himself as much as her, and tonight, Mila would make him see this. As his hand moved up to clasp her breast, Mila moved her hand down and slipped it between her thighs. She gave a quick intake of breath as she began to stroke her soft folds, not surprised that she was already wet. Caim’s reaction was immediate.
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