The Practice

by Grant C. Holland

  Thomas responded by wrapping Hadley in a tight hug. He said, “You probably need one of these.” He could feel Hadley tense for a moment and then relax into the embrace. Their faces were only inches apart, and Thomas was thrilled to be close enough that their bodies touched briefly as they each inhaled taking deep breaths.

  Hadley began to talk about his day. The words tumbled forth from his mouth at a rapid speed. It was much faster than Hadley’s normal manner of speaking. He explained Aunt Mae’s fall and helping her up and into the care with Aunt Tina’s assistance. He digressed briefly to mention Aunt Mae was the only person he considered to be immediate family left in his life. He described the long time spent in the waiting room, and then he described the meeting with Dr. Pickett. Hadley said, “Now it feels like it went by really fast, but while we were waiting I was convinced time was slowing down to a halt.”

  Hadley closed his eyes for a moment and whispered, “The hug feels really good.” When he opened his eyes again, only inches separated their lips. Thomas closed the gap and pressed his soft lips to Hadley’s. He followed the gesture by sweeping one hand up to the back of Hadley’s head.

  Half of Thomas’ body tensed for a negative reaction, but what he got instead was pressure back from Hadley’s lips. It was perfect. Thomas took it one step further and attempted to part Hadley’s lips with the tip of his tongue. He could feel Hadley’s chest beginning to rise and fall quickly against his own body.

  The warm, wet tips of their tongues touched. It sent an electric sensation up Thomas’ spine and was too much for Hadley. He broke the hug and pushed against Thomas’ chest creating a gulf between them.

  Thomas stared back at Hadley in surprise. He struggled for words. He began to say, “Hadley, I’m sorry…” but it was too late.

  Hadley mumbled, “I just…can’t,” and he stormed out the door slamming it behind him.

  Thomas listened as Hadley’s feet clomped down the stairs and then he climbed into his truck pulling the door shut. Thomas sighed heavily while the truck backed out of the driveway. Hadley didn’t have far to go. After all, he just lived across the street.

  Thomas poured himself a glass of wine and grabbed the remote control for the TV. He settled on to the couch to look for something to take his mind off Hadley. It wasn’t going to be easy. The kiss was perfect, the best he’d known in a long time, until Hadley shoved him away.

  9

  Hadley

  Two nights later Hadley sat on the sofa with Aunt Mae after dinner. She insisted on preparing a lasagna even with the cast on her arm. Hadley watched her brute determination to serve an outstanding meal even though it was obvious she was feeling pain. He offered to finish preparing the meal with her instructions, but she waved him off. She said, “I’ve faced much more difficult hardships than this in the past.”

  As they settled on to the sofa in the living room, she looked exhausted but relieved. He asked, “Can I get you some hot tea, Aunt Mae?”

  She smiled softly and said, “That sounds really nice, Hadley I’ll find a movie to watch. I’m think something light and fun tonight, maybe with Cary Grant.”

  Hadley brought the hot tea with just a teaspoon of honey stirred in. He also carried a beer for himself. Settling himself on the couch, he attempted to concentrate on the movie, but his thoughts kept drifting back to the kiss with Thomas. Hadley backed out of one of his evenings of odd jobs at the animal hospital. He needed time to think before seeing Thomas again. He was still finding it difficult to believe what happened.

  Hadley kissed Thomas. It wasn’t just that Thomas kissed him. Thomas started it, but he didn’t force Hadley to open his mouth. It was the first time he ever kissed a man, and he had to admit, it was good, until all of the thoughts came crashing in.

  That’s when Hadley ran. It made him shudder just to think of himself cutting and running. Hadley Rogers was not that type of man. He always stood his ground and faced things head on. Running was the coward’s way out.

  Hadley pulled his legs up on to the couch toward his chest. He wrapped his arms around tight and watched the opening credits of the movie. He glanced over at Aunt Mae and she finally looked relaxed. A small smile curved the corners of her mouth. Hadley convinced her to put the sling for her arm back on after dinner. The pinched look on her face caused by the pain in her wrist was gone.

  The kiss wouldn’t leave Hadley’s mind. Thomas’ lips were soft but they were firm, too. Kissing him was not like kissing a woman. Hadley could sense an aggressiveness that was exciting, even thrilling. His body wanted more. He wanted more than just a kiss. He wanted to touch Thomas. He knew that now. He wanted to slip his fingers up under Thomas’ shirt. Hadley wanted so much more.

  Thinking that way about Thomas felt dangerous. Hadley knew that it wasn’t just about sex. There was something about Thomas, the veterinarian, that touched him deep inside. He was a good man, and he was a dedicated man. He was independent and strong. Hadley’s intimate experiences with women were all with women who wanted his strength. They wanted his support. They wanted to fall into his arms.

  Thomas was entirely different. When he wrapped Hadley in his arms for the hug after the long evening in the hospital with Aunt Mae, all of Hadley’s worries slipped away. It was a great feeling, and Hadley was deeply comfortable until the kiss.

  Then Hadley’s thoughts went to the whole concept of fitting anyone into his life in a dating relationship. Hadley was working a job and a half. On top of that he needed to take care of Aunt Mae. Hadley wondered if he would even have time to hang out with his buddies down at the Blue Goose. His life was full. He didn’t have room for anyone or anything else.

  Leaning back against the couch and holding his legs tight, Hadley tried to focus on the movie on the screen. Cary Grant was handsome. So many men were handsome to Hadley. They always had been, but many women were beautiful and sexy, too. It made the world a very confusing place sometimes.

  The most frustrating thing about Thomas was that he pushed hard on issues that Hadley thought were settled in his life. Since he was attracted to both women and men, and he had known that since high school, he expected that he could just focus on one instead of the other. Maybe that’s what most people did. But then Thomas was such a powerful force of nature that he wouldn’t let the question be settled for Hadley. He had to push down doors and throw open windows.

  “Do you need more tea, Aunt Mae?” asked Hadley.

  She looked into her mug and said, “No, Hadley, I’m doing just fine. I still have almost half of the mug left. I love Cary Grant, don’t you?”

  Hadley nearly blurted out something about the actor’s appearance, but instead he just said, “Yes, he was a great actor.”

  Aunt Mae said, “I used to have such a crush on him when I was a little girl. I watched him kiss women on the screen and hoped that someday I would grow up and he would kiss me. He always wore suits, and I wondered what they would feel like under my fingertips.”

  Hadley sighed. He did remember what Thomas’ back and shoulders felt like under his fingertips. His body was hard and firm, but there was just enough pliable flesh to hold on tight. He remembered Thomas’ chest brushing lightly against his own. Hadley shook his head to try and clear his thoughts.

  Aunt Mae asked, “Hadley, dear, are you okay? You seem a little distant this evening, lost in your own thoughts.”

  Hadley searched for a different topic to talk about. When one drifted into his mind, he grabbed hard at it. He said, “I was just thinking about the dog that I saw hit the other night. I just can’t completely get it out of my head.” That much was true. Images of Lucky lying on the street even appeared in his dreams.

  Aunt Mae said, “That was a horrible thing. I saw a similar thing when I was a girl. A dog was hit by a car, and I heard it yelp and then saw it hobble off into the ditch beside the road. My father didn’t stop to help, but the car right behind us did. I always hoped that the dog was okay.”

  Hadley said, “She should be having h
er puppies any day now.”

  “Are they keeping her at the animal hospital? Is that new handsome veterinarian taking care of her?”

  “He is for now. How do you know he’s handsome, Aunt Mae? You haven’t met him, have you?”

  She said, “They ran his photo in the newspaper. There was a little article about Emery Benton retiring and a photo of his replacement. I think his name is Thomas?”

  Hadley nodded. “Yes, Thomas.” He struggled to change the subject. “Aunt Mae, I think there is something that we need to talk about, too.”

  She reached across her body and rubbed lightly at the cast.

  Hadley asked, “Are you okay?”

  She smiled. “I’m fine. It just itches a little. I think that’s a good thing. What did you want to talk about?”

  He said, “Well, you aren’t getting younger, and I think it’s getting harder for you to do some everyday things.”

  She interrupted, “If you are thinking of a nursing home, stop right there Hadley. I won’t even consider it.”

  He shook his head. “I wouldn’t consider that either, Aunt Mae, but I had something else in mind.”

  “Something else?” she asked.

  He said, “Yes, I was thinking that maybe you could move in with me.”

  She stared back at him and then slowly shook her head. “I can’t do that, Hadley. You do enough for me already. I couldn’t impose on you that way.”

  Hadley said, “It’s no imposition, and hear me out, Aunt Mae. My house is much more accessible than yours. It has plenty of space on the ground floor. You could have your own bedroom and bathroom without having to climb stairs. It would even be easy to put a small ramp in up to the porch if we needed that.”

  She said, “I don’t need a ramp, Hadley. I can still climb the stairs.”

  “Not right now, Aunt Mae, but we need to be thinking about the future.” He stood up from the couch and asked, “Are you finished with your tea?”

  She nodded yes. He carried both the tea and his empty beer bottle to the kitchen. He called back toward the living room. “I think it is something that deserves serious consideration.”

  As he walked back into the living room, she reached out to the cushion at her side and said, “Sit here, Hadley, I have some things to say.”

  He seated himself close to her, turned to the side and pulled one leg up on to the couch. “I’m listening, Aunt Mae.”

  “When I was younger, your Uncle Ed and I decided to take his mother into our home after his father passed away. Neither of us wanted to see her in a nursing home, so it sounded like the right decision.”

  Hadley nodded. “That does sound like a good thing to do.”

  She nodded. “It was a good idea, but it didn’t really work out that way.”

  “What happened?” asked Hadley.

  “She was demanding. I mean, she was very demanding. She ordered your poor uncle around from morning until night. She had him fetching drinks and snacks, helping her up and down, bringing her the TV listings, going out to pick up the mail exactly when it arrived. She ran him ragged. I decided then and there that I would never do that to one of my own.”

  Hadley reached out and touched her knee. “You could never be like that. I know you. You are nothing like that.”

  She smiled. “Hadley, I agree that I would never do anything like that on purpose, but it’s a strange thing. When we get older, sometimes we forget the promises we made to ourselves when we were young.”

  He said, “But if you move in here, you’ve got so much help nearby. Dr. Benton is just across the street, and I’ll be around to help every night and morning.”

  “I really don’t want to be a burden, Hadley. I think when it’s my time to go, I’ll just lay down and be done with it. I don’t want to linger for years and years while I have to be cared for like a baby. It’s just not fair to others. That’s not the way life should be.”

  Hadley asked, “If the shoe were on the other foot, would you take care of me, Aunt Mae?”

  She sighed. “You’re really not going to let go of this, are you?”

  “I want to make sure you are taken care of well, and the best way for me to do that is to have you in my house.”

  She said, “Then you have to make me a promise, Hadley.”

  “What kind of promise?”

  “I want you to continue on with your social life. If I’m at your house, that won’t mean you can’t go out. You’re a young man, and you should be looking for a young woman to make you happy. Promise me that you won’t forget about that?”

  Hadley wondered if it was really a young woman that would make him happy. He said, “I promise, Aunt Mae, and you have to be nice and open-minded if I bring someone home.”

  She laughed. “When have I not been nice and open-minded?”

  He grinned and reached forward wrapping his arms tight around his great aunt. He said, “I think I should be going for tonight, but we will talk more soon about moving you into my place.”

  She kissed him on the cheek. “I will be fine until then. Don’t worry about me, Hadley. I’m tough.”

  “Yes, you are.”

  As he pulled out of Aunt Mae’s driveway in his truck, Hadley’s thoughts drifted back to Thomas, his other obsession of the moment. He thought that perhaps when Thomas saw Aunt Mae moving in, he would decide that Hadley was too busy to pursue. It would at least give Hadley legitimate reasons to excuse himself from invitations.

  When he got out of the truck in his own driveway, Hadley glanced back across the street. Lights were on in the carriage house. That meant that Thomas was likely home and awake. Hadley wondered what Thomas might be doing. He thought about Thomas sitting on the couch watching TV, and then he couldn’t help but think of the kiss again and imagining Thomas’ hands touching his body.

  Hadley shivered as he unlocked his own door. He knew that he couldn’t avoid Thomas forever. He had to figure out a reasonable path forward.

  10

  Thomas

  It was the end of a long week. Thomas had his fair share of emergencies with both cats and dogs at the clinic, and Hadley called off his maintenance work for the rest of the week. Hadley assigned responsibility for canceling the work to the need to care for his Aunt Mae, but Thomas thought the kiss was the real underlying reason.

  Thomas sought some distraction and direct support when he agreed to get together with his Purple Pack buddies at the Blue Goose Friday night. By the time he arrived, all but Aaron were already hanging out, talking about the week just passed and downing cheap beer.

  Derek called out, “Hey Thomas! I guess you really are back to stay. Good to see you buddy!” Thomas gave him a half-hearted hug.

  Emma asked, “What are you drinking? I’ll spring for the first round.”

  Thomas said, “Give me one of that IPA I had last time. It was nice and hoppy.” He glanced around at the gathered group. “Where’s Aaron?”

  Yale laughed. “He has a date?”

  “Here in little Catletts’ Cove?” asked Thomas.

  Yale said, “He told me the guy’s from Mitchell. They met each other in an online dating site.”

  Emma handed Thomas the beer and he said, “Is that a euphemism for a hookup site?”

  Derek added in his two cents. “No, I think this is really a dating site. Yale and I helped him work through his profile. Of course, when we were done, we made him sound twice as good as he really is. I’d go after the guy we described in Aaron’s profile.”

  They all laughed. Thomas pulled the glass to his lips and sighed heavily as he took his first sip.

  Emma grabbed a stool out and sat next to Thomas. She leaned against his shoulder and said, “You don’t look like you’ve had the greatest week. You’ve been sighing since you walked through the door.”

  Thomas said, “No, I’m fine. It’s just been a long week at the clinic.”

  Emma raised an eyebrow. “Those didn’t sound like work sighs. Those sounded like something on your mind s
ighs.” She looked around and asked, “Wouldn’t you agree Derek?”

  Derek said, “He does look a little bit melancholy. I haven’t seen that big toothy grin yet.”

  Thomas set the beer down and glanced around the small table at his friends. He said, “You’re not going to just drop it, are you?”

  Jane smiled and shook her head no.

  Thomas said, “Okay, I’m sure Derek and Yale have told the rest of you about the guy who is doing odd jobs for me at the clinic.”

  Emma said, “You mean Hadley Rogers? My little sister was in his class in high school.”

  “Yes, I mean Hadley Rogers. He came over to my place. In the weirdest coincidence, he lives just across the street.”

  Yale clapped a hand across Thomas’ shoulder and said, “That sounds promising.”

  “Well, he was a little upset. He had to rush his great aunt to the hospital. She’s fine, but it still was one of those close calls. He was supposed to be fixing cabinets for me, so I told him to stop by anyway, even though it was late.”

  “Fixing cabinets?” asked Derek. “Do you mean something like taking a screwdriver to tighten up a hinge?”

  Thomas sighed. “Yeah, something like that.”

  Derek said, “So you invited him over and jumped him at the door?”

  Thomas wrapped both hands around his glass and stared down into the amber liquid. “Yeah, something like that.”

  Emma’s jaw dropped. “You didn’t, did you? You’re probably the most decent among all of us here.”

  Derek said, “Hey!” and gave Emma a gentle little shove.

  She said, “Like I was saying…what do you mean you jumped him, Thomas?”

  “I gave him a hug, because it was late and he was still distraught. Then we stared into each other’s eyes, and then I kissed him.”

  Derek and Yale high fived. Derek asked, “How was it.”

  Thomas drew out the words. “It was really…great…until he shoved me away.”