by Jayne Frost
It was true. The place was empty for the moment. Which was a good thing. I didn’t want the entire company to hear Ivan lay into me. Or worse. It was the worse that had my skin prickling and my palms sweating.
Daryl jerked a nod but didn’t look happy about it.
Straightening my spine, I blew out a breath before slipping into the lion’s den. The room was eerily quiet, morning light filtering in from the window behind Olga’s desk.
Ivan lifted his gaze when he sensed me at the door to the inner office. Easing back in his chair, icy blue eyes looked me over.
“Come in, malysh,” he said, his tone measured.
As I took a seat in front of his desk, he turned his laptop in my direction. I blinked at the frozen image on the screen. A YouTube video of Miles and me outside the imaging center.
639,427 views.
My gulp was audible. A dead giveaway. “How did you know it was me?”
A shadow crossed his features. He looked…insulted. And just as quickly it disappeared. “Never mind that.” He tipped his chin to the screen. “Explain.”
And I did. I told him everything. From my original visit to Dr. Reber, to my first meeting with Miles, to the eviction. And finally, my appointment at the imaging center.
The weight of his intense stare forced my gaze to my hands. “I’m sorry.”
For a long moment, Ivan said nothing. I cringed when the springs of his chair squeaked. And then he was in front of me, a hip resting against the desk.
“For what?” he asked, and when I looked up, he smiled. “Getting caught?”
Classic Ivan. I smiled back. “Partly.”
But there was more. His was the only opinion that mattered. And not just about my dancing.
“Why did you feel you could not tell me?”
I kept my features schooled despite my shock. “You’ve always said that—”
“Whatever I have said does not apply to you,” he interrupted, the edge in his tone making my stomach churn. Silence swelled between us, followed by Ivan’s heavy sigh. “But I suppose you did not know. And that is my fault.”
Breaking eye contact—something he rarely did—Ivan shifted his focus to the wall. To something beyond our conversation.
“Before your mama died…I promised her I would take care of you,” he said quietly. “I fear I have not always done a good job.”
At the mention of my mother, the air grew still. Quiet. Just the sound of my beating heart in my ears. “I don’t understand. Why would Mama ask you to take care of me?”
The corners of his lips ticked up slightly. “Because I loved her.” My mouth dropped open, and he shrugged. A helpless gesture from such a strong man. “We cannot help who we fall in love with, malysh. But in a different world…” He took me in from head to toe, his gaze lingering on my worn shoes. “The money Katya left you from the insurance. It is gone?” he asked cautiously, as if he knew the answer.
The screw in my chest tightened. “For a long time now.”
Ivan’s lids closed, the muscle in his jaw ticking. The movement wasn’t exaggerated. But since he rarely showed emotion, it seemed monumental. “And you did not come to me?”
Defeat marred his tone, and I shifted uncomfortably.
“I…”
The outer door creaked, and we turned in unison. Expecting Daryl to lumber in, the breath caught in my throat. But it was Micha who appeared, looking perplexed.
“Who’s the scary guy in the hallway?” He glanced between Ivan and me, and an explanation coiled around my tongue.
“Never mind that,” Ivan said brusquely. His eyes found mine as he reclaimed his seat behind the desk, and I pressed my lips into a firm line. He didn’t want me telling Micha about Miles. That much was clear.
Micha shrugged off his curiosity, flopping onto the chair beside me. His foot brushed against mine, and I gave him the side-eye, discreetly shifting away from him. The muscle in his neck jumped, but he kept his attention on our teacher.
“Tatiana called yesterday to extend an invitation to the opening of their production of Swan Lake,” Ivan said casually. “You will be able to meet your new roommates and acquaint yourselves with the city.”
Micha and I both sat forward.
“When?” I asked, barely able to contain the excitement in my tone.
New York. It was really happening.
“One month,” Ivan replied before releasing a measured breath. “But it is not all fun and games. You will be expected to demonstrate your skills for the Company.”
“Demonstrate?” Micha asked. “Like, the piece we’re working on?”
“A portion, yes. You will also need to put in extra time to make sure that every move is on point. Every pirouette. Every leap. This first impression will be crucial. You must practice together, and also individually. Will that be a problem?”
I shook my head. “No problem.”
Micha clapped his hands, then rubbed them together maniacally. “When do we start?”
Ivan’s gaze snagged mine. It had been a long time since he’d spoken to me with just his eyes. It was a language we’d perfected when I was young. When the answer to every question was yes. More practice. More lessons. More time in the studio.
I promised your mama I would always take care of you.
And he had.
Despite the ache in my joints from yesterday’s ordeal, I smiled. “I’m ready whenever y’all are.”
Miles
Taryn wandered around the den, her fingers skimming lovingly over picture frames and knickknacks. I sat on the couch, letting her take her time. God, I’d missed her. And yet, seeing her like this, relaxed and completely at ease, was painful in a way I couldn’t describe.
In public, Taryn was the face of one of the most prestigious management companies in the music industry. But here, she was the girl I’d met in junior high. Paige’s best friend. They shared the same mannerisms. The same inflection in their speech. Was I the only one who noticed it? And was this ache the reason I’d pushed Taryn away five years ago?
I froze when she snatched the origami bird I’d made out of Paige’s Rolling Stone article from the table. I hadn’t had the chance to put it with the others.
“I forgot you did this,” she said, facing me with a smile. “What’s it called?”
“Origami.”
“Yes!” She flopped down beside me, plucking one of the wings on the bird with her thumb. “You made me one, remember?”
My head dropped back, and I laughed. “A dinosaur. I remember, T-Rex.”
Her features softened as her nickname slipped over my tongue. She’d earned the moniker because despite her small stature, Taryn roared like a prehistoric creature when she was angry.
Breathing deeply, she looked around, like she was inhaling the memories. They were thick in this room.
“So, tell me about the girl,” she finally said, easing into the corner of the sectional. Her stormy eyes held a million questions. But as usual, she waited for the confession instead of prying it out with a crowbar.
And I realized that’s what she’d always done. No judgment. Only love.
I was a bastard for pushing her away. And a bigger bastard for calling her now, when I needed help.
I took her hand, the one not holding the bird, and skimmed my thumb over the diamond-encrusted band on her ring finger. “First tell me about this.”
Happiness flashed across her features, but just as quickly she bit down the smile. My hackles went up, and it was as if no time had passed.
If someone had hurt her…
“What is it?” I asked.
A soft smile curved her lips, her shoulder lifting in a half shrug. “Nothing, really. It just occurred to me how much everything has changed. Chase…he makes me so happy. And I’m sad that you don’t know him. That Paige will never know him.”
She sat up straighter, and a sinking feeling washed over me. Taryn had on her apology face. But why?
“Listen, Miles—”
“I’m sorry,” I blurted, beating her to the punch. “So fucking sorry, Taryn.”
She shook her head and then went on as if she hadn’t heard me. “I knew how much pain you were in.” Her gaze dipped to my leg, and she winced. “I was so busy trying to organize things, I didn’t think about getting a nurse to monitor your meds. I picked up your prescriptions. Read the warning labels on the inserts they stapled to the bags about interactions with alcohol. But I didn’t think…”
Shock stole my breath as her apology floated between us. All this time, I thought she knew. That she was keeping my secret. And that was bad enough. But all these years she’d been mired in guilt over something I’d never even considered.
“I know you’re going to tell me it wasn’t my fault,” she said dully. “And logically, you’re probably right. But I had only one job after the accident. Being there for you and Tori. I took it on willingly. Maybe if I wasn’t so busy trying to manage everything I would’ve seen the signs of addiction and—”
“I’m not an addict, Taryn.”
She blinked at me, and if it were possible, her eyes grew even more troubled. “You can’t say things like that, Miles. It’s dangerous.” Her tone was soft. Cajoling. “I know because Chase is an addict.”
Her fingers found her lips as if she hadn’t meant to reveal that fact. But I already knew. From Tori.
“He was clean for eleven years,” she went on after a long moment. “But he started thinking he had it beat. And you can’t do that. Because the minute you let yourself forget, it can sneak up on you.”
A shudder rolled through her. And I didn’t know if it had something to do with Chase, or if she was picturing me on the bathroom floor the night I’d tried to end it.
Shame washed over me, and the explanation stalled on my lips. Until our eyes met. One look at the torment twisting her brow, and I set aside my embarrassment.
“The overdose—it wasn’t an accident.”
She cocked her head. “Not an accident? I don’t understand.”
Slipping the bird from Taryn’s hand, I slowly unfolded the intricate design. The column of her throat bobbed as I smoothed a finger over the crease on Paige’s face.
“You were right about the pain. But it wasn’t my leg. Paige and I…we were together. For a long time. I loved her, T-Rex.”
“No.” She hopped to her feet, shaking her head. “I would’ve known. I was her best friend. She would’ve told me.”
Moments passed as she searched my face. When her bottom lip wobbled, I took her hand again.
“There’s more,” I said, urging her down next to me. “The night of the accident, we had a fight. I wanted to bring things out in the open, and Paige wasn’t ready. But she offered to come to my bunk. Just to sleep. We used to do that a lot.” I forced out a breath. “But I said no.”
I steeled myself for Taryn’s reaction. The moment when she’d put the pieces together and realize what I’d done. What my pride had cost. She’d leave. And this time she probably wouldn’t come back.
She melted against my side. Maybe from the shock. I looked down at her, prepared to meet the accusation in her eyes.
Tears shimmered in the blue depths, but no blame.
Threading her arm through mine, she rested her chin on my shoulder. “It wasn’t your fault.”
I should’ve felt relief. But I didn’t.
You want to be punished.
Sheppard had told me that. And until I saw the acceptance in Taryn’s eyes, I didn’t believe it was true.
When I shook my head, it only strengthened her resolve.
“It was an accident,” she insisted, her tone resolute. “A terrible tragedy. You don’t get to own it or use it as an excuse.”
Her touch was too soft for my liking. More than I deserved. “I’m not.”
“You are.” She held me tighter, fingers digging into my flesh. “You don’t get to die, Miles,” she croaked when I finally broke free. “Not when the rest of us have to keep on living.”
I bristled at her use of the present tense. “I’m not trying to off myself. I’m right here. Alive.”
She looked around. “This isn’t living. It’s existing. There’s a difference.”
A part of me believed that too. Or else Taryn wouldn’t be here. I scrubbed a hand down my face. “That’s why I hired the girl…er, Gelsey. The one on the video. To help me.”
Taryn didn’t say anything for a long moment. She wanted more information. And hell, she probably deserved it. But I couldn’t. Not yet. And maybe she knew that too, because a resigned sigh parted her lips.
“Tell me about her,” she said, tugging my T-shirt sleeve. “And we’ll figure out what to do to get you out of this mess.”
Gelsey
Daryl reached into the back seat and pulled the blanket off me. “Sorry about that.”
Smiling weakly, I attempted to lift myself off the floorboard where I’d been hiding from the paparazzi at the gate.
“Not yet.” His big hand came down gently on my shoulder. “Wait until we get into the garage.”
Words were beyond me, so I sagged into my former position, resting my forehead against my knee. Now that my muscles had cooled from the five-hour rehearsal, the pain was everywhere. And I was so tired, I could barely keep my eyes open.
I felt a tap on my shoulder, and my head snapped up to investigate. Daryl was next to my open door, offering his hand. He wore the same concerned expression I’d noted all day long when our eyes would connect after I’d taken a tumble or slipped out of Micha’s hold and landed on the ground.
“Thanks,” I said, sliding my palm against his.
I bit down a grimace when he gave my arm a gentle tug. But he noticed, and his grip went slack.
“Maybe I should carry you.”
I laughed softly. “No, I’m fine. Just a little stiff. This is normal.”
“Nothing about what I saw today was normal.”
Before I could comment, he banded an arm around my waist, and hauled me to my feet.
“You good?” he asked. When I nodded, he ducked inside the car and grabbed my gym bag. I reached for it, but he shook his head, slipping the strap over his shoulder. “Are you sure you can walk?”
“Positive.” He matched my slow pace as I hobbled toward the side door.
“I thought you worked with performers.” I peered up at him as we stepped into the breezeway. “This can’t be all that different.”
His hand curved around my elbow, guiding me around some uneven bricks on the stone path. “I haven’t seen anything like this since the military.” I chuckled to myself, picturing Ivan as a drill sergeant. But Daryl remained stoic. “You do this every day?”
I tried to shrug, but it hurt too much. “It’s not usually this intense. We’re learning a new routine.”
My shoulders sagged in relief when we entered the kitchen. Until I saw Miles rise from his seat at the breakfast bar.
“What happened?”
He directed the question at Daryl, but his eyes remained on me. The intensity of his stare made my stomach flip as he closed the distance between us.
“Nothing,” I replied, flustered by his proximity. “Just a rough day at the office.”
Miles was dressed in board shorts and a T-shirt, reminding me of why I was here to begin with. I wasn’t a houseguest. Or a friend.
Cementing on a smile, I straightened my spine. “You ready for your session?”
His brows dove together as he looked me over. “Yeah. That’s not going to happen. Let’s get you upstairs.”
“Miles…”
Ignoring my sigh, he took my gym bag from Daryl. “I think I can manage to stretch all by myself. You can supervise if you want. After you get something to eat. What are you hungry for?”
A protest danced on the tip of my tongue. He didn’t need to feed me. But my stomach betrayed me and let out a little rumble.
Daryl chuckled. “I’ll whip something up if Emily’s not around.”
/>
Miles frowned. “No thanks, dude. I’ve seen what you eat.”
But the big guy was already heading for the fridge. I was secretly relieved when he slapped a couple of rib-eyes on the bar, along with fresh broccoli and sweet potatoes. From what I’d gathered, Miles existed on fast food, and he probably considered veggie pizza a nutritionally balanced meal.
“How do you like your steak?” Daryl asked me, ignoring Miles for the moment. When I hesitated, he added, “It’s organic. And you need the protein.”
I couldn’t argue. “Medium rare.”
Daryl went back to his preparation, and Miles let out an irritated snort. “Medium well for me. Thanks for asking.”
Daryl’s lip twitched in response, the only outward acknowledgment. Miles glared at him, but I saw the affection behind his narrowed gaze. He liked Daryl, whether he wanted to admit it or not.
“Emily’s apron is in the pantry. Feel free to use it,” Miles quipped as he grabbed my hand.
My skin tingled, a warm glow spreading from the place we were joined. It had been so long since anyone had taken care of me besides Ivan. And he wasn’t exactly demonstrative.
I froze when we reached the stairs, keenly aware of my aching back. Miles slipped an arm around my waist, like he sensed my trepidation. “Lean on me. I won’t let you fall.”
I blinked up at him, recalling the same promise from Micha.
Trust me, Gels. I won’t let you fall.
Why my mind went there, I couldn’t say. Exhaustion. Or maybe it was all the bruises marring my skin. Because that’s what happened when you trusted someone. It left a mark. On your skin or on your soul.
Breaking our connection, I made a valiant attempt to stand on my own two feet. But my legs were so heavy, I tripped on the third step.
Miles was right there, his strong chest against my back, and his lips next to my ear. I could feel his heartbeat. “I got you, little mouse.”
And this time, I didn’t fight.
Miles
Emily popped out of her chair when I walked into the kitchen.
“I didn’t know you were still here,” I said, setting the tray with Gelsey’s leftovers on the island next to a cooling rack with chocolate chip cookies on top. “You make these?”