by Angie Sage
ROMILLY BADGER
A new recruit who scored highly in the last Manuscriptorium Entrance Examination. Romilly has beautiful handwriting and a wicked sense of humor. Jillie Djinn has already had to speak to her about laughing on duty and bad timekeeping. Partridge very much hopes that she will not be dismissed.
EPHANIAH GREBE
The Manuscriptorium’s Conservation, Preservation and Protection Scribe. He lives in the cellars under the Manuscriptorium and is rarely seen aboveground. Ephaniah had only just begun work at the Manuscriptorium when he was ambushed by a Rat Hex. It was a permanent Hex, but Morwenna the Witch Mother managed to undo some of the effects, leaving Ephaniah as part rat, part man. Ephaniah is a skilled and painstaking Conservation Scribe and can rescue even the most damaged papers, Spells and keepsakes.
HOW THE CHIEF HERMETIC SCRIBE IS Picked
STEP 1
The current Chief Hermetic Scribe must die or retire.
STEP 2
Each Manuscriptorium scribe places his or her pen into the large enameled Draw Pot.
STEP 3
The outgoing Chief Hermetic Scribe, or the most senior scribe, takes the Pot into the Hermetic Chamber. It is left there overnight.
STEP 4
In the morning, the youngest scribe is sent to the Chamber. One pen will be lying on the desk while all the others will remain in the Pot.
STEP 5
Whoever is the owner of the pen on the desk is the new Chief Hermetic Scribe.
A NOTE: The Draw has been used for thousands of years. Only the best are Picked. Most scribes toil away their entire lives without ever being Picked. The position of Chief Hermetic Scribe is a great honor, and those Picked must be serious, dedicated and fair. And preferably not given to counting haddock.
DAILY APPOINTMENT DIARY OF JILLIE DJINN, CHIEF HERMETIC SCRIBE (CHS)
* * *
DIARY KEEPER
O. Beetle Beetle
Monday
TIME: 9:22 A.M.
WITH: Silas Heap
REASON FOR APPOINTMENT: To ask for twenty-one pamphlet copies at discounted Ordinary Wizard rate.
NOTES: Three-and-a-half minutes late. CHS refused to see.
ACTION: OBB agreed to OW discount. Scribe employed: Scribe Foxy. To be collected 9:00 A.M. tomorrow.
TIME: 2:55 P.M.
WITH: Terry Tarsal
REASON FOR APPOINTMENT: Delivery of shoes.
NOTES: On time.
ACTION: CHS declared shoe s unsatisfactory. Rescheduled for Tuesday 10:08 A.M.
Tuesday
TIME: 9:00 A.M.
WITH: Silas Heap
REASON FOR APPOINTMENT: To collect pamphlets.
NOTES: Arrived 10:07 A.M.
ACTION: OBB handed over pamphlets. Work satisfactory, apart from one pamphlet slightly smudged. Not charged for. Full payment received.
Tuesday
TIME: 10:08 A.M.
WITH: Terry Tarsal
REASON FOR APPOINTMENT: To deliver shoes for CHS (see previous day).
NOTES: On time but refused to wait. Accused Silas Heap of “blathering on and on while some people had work to do.”
ACTION: OBB asked Mr. Tarsal to leave shoes. Assured him shoes would reach CHS ASAP. Mr. Tarsal left shoes.
SUBSIDIARY NOTE: Door slamming has caused second paper stack on the left window to collapse. OBB asked Scribe Partridge to rebuild.
Wednesday
TIME: 3:19 P.M.
WITH: Ma Custard
REASON FOR APPOINTMENT: Witnessing of signature.
NOTES: One minute early.
ACTION: Contract for new licorice supplier Signed and Sealed.
SUBSIDIARY NOTE: Client left large tub of banana fizzes for scribes. Thank-you letter sent.
Thursday
TIME: 10:12 A.M.
WITH: Marcia Overstrand
REASON FOR APPOINTMENT: Not given.
NOTES: Sixteen minutes late but insisted on being seen.
ACTION: New appointment.
TIME: 10:28 A.M.
NOTES: On time.
ACTION: CHS provided Scribe Badger to facilitate access to Hidden shelf number three.
TIME: 4:02 P.M.
WITH: Silas Heap
REASON FOR APPOINTMENT: Counter-Feet Sealed Box repair.
NOTES: Three-and-a-half minutes late.
ACTION: CHS refused to see. Box to go in night basket for EG.
Friday
TIME: 2:16 P.M.
WITH: Marcia Overstrand
REASON FOR APPOINTMENT: Not given.
NOTES: Arrived 2:10 P.M. Requested to be seen immediately. Refused to wait until appointment time.
SUBSIDIARY NOTE: Scribe Partridge rebuilt second paper stack on the left window again.
* * *
Beetle's INSPECTION CLERK DAYBOOk
O. BEETLE BEETLE’S VERY OWN HISTORY OF THE ICE TUNNELS
(work in progress)
Dear readers,
You may wonder why no one has ever told you about the Ice Tunnels. Well, you are not alone. Even though I am the Ice Tunnel Inspection Clerk, no one has ever told me anything either. But here is some stuff I have worked out.
1. The Ice Tunnels used to be just tunnels without ice.
2. In the old days, officials used the Tunnels to travel around the Castle underground.
3. Almost the entire Castle is connected by the Tunnels. Weird…
4. The Tunnels were sealed by the Emergency Freeze. This happened so fast that thirty-nine people were trapped
MY SLED
ADD AERODYNAMIC WINGS ONTO THE BACK.
ADD A POINTED NOSE TO THE FRONT FOR MORE SPEED.
SEP'S SLED
WIZARD TOWER SLED
THE ICE TUNNELS
ONCE-A-WEEK INSPECTION DUTIES:
Travel the Ice Tunnels on Manuscriptorium Sled.
Check that all the hatches remain Sealed.
Report any suspicious hatches, e.g., with clear ice indicating recent ReSealing.
ONCE-A-MONTH INSPECTION DUTIES:
Travel every tunnel, even those without hatches.
Test ice samples at specified areas.
Report to CHS.
SAFETY PRECAUTIONS:
Always secure sled, as it will wander off if left unattended.
Do not breathe in while Ice Wraith passing.
Always inform duty scribe of time expected to return.
Always ReSeal hatch to Manuscriptorium.
BEETLE’S ICE TUNNEL INFO
FAVORITE SPOT: The high slope on the way to the Van Klampff Hatch. The perfect spot for the Reverse Whizz jump.
LEAST FAVORITE SPOT: The tunnel to the Palace kitchen hatch. Too thin for any tricks. Also feels creepy.
GHOSTS: Usual mix of officials, Wizards and tramps. Avoid those trapped in Emergency Freeze if you can. Some of them are still panicking. Not nice.
ICE WRAITHS: The worst is Moaning Hilda. Hold your breath as she goes past or she’ll freeze the breath inside you. Cover your ears or she’ll burst you r eardrums. Other Ice Wraiths much less powerful.
MOANING HILDA
BEST SLED MOVES
JUMP: Free catching air at the top of a steep hill.
DECK-UP: Riding on the rear edges of the runner. Backwards alley:
BACKWARDS ALLEY: Riding backward.
SPIN REVERSE WHIZZ: Once around and then coming to a stop with a backward slide.
DOUBLE SPIN REVERSE WHIZZ: Twice around and then coming to a stop with a backward slide.
BACKWARDS ALLEY SPIN-AROUND WHIZZ: Coming to a stop from the backward position, then with a spin at the end and a sliding stop. The best!!!
JILLIE DJINN ALWAYS SCOLDS ME WHEN I SPEND TOO MUCH TIME IN THE ICE TUNNELS.
PAPERS FROM AROUND THE CASTLE
MR. AND MRS. GRINGE OF THE NORTH GATE GATEHOUSE
GRINGE, THE GATEKEEPER
No one in the Castle knows Gringe’s first name—or so he thinks. But the writer of these biographies has done her b
est to find out as much for her readers as possible. She can reveal here that the keeper of the North Gate gatehouse once answered to the name of Augustus—although he no longer does so, as the writer found out last week. In fact the writer strongly recommends that you do not use this form of address if you want to use the North Gate drawbridge.
Augustus Gringe is married to Theodora Gringe. They met in the Port and came to the Castle for a better life. At first they had a hard time and lived in a ramshackle shelter beneath the Castle wall. When Rupert was born, Gringe was determined to do better for his family. One day, when the Bridge Boy at the North Gate was injured by a loose chain, Gringe helped out. It was not long before his strength and reliability were noticed and he was asked to be stand-in Gatekeeper. Two years later, when the Gatekeeper retired, Gringe took over and at last his family had a proper roof over their heads.
The Gringes now have two children, Rupert and Lucy. Gringe is proud of what his son, Rupert, is doing and often talks about him, but he refuses to discuss his daughter, Lucy. Mrs. Gringe has been known to tell her closest friends that her husband has never gotten over Lucy running off with Simon Heap. He worries that Lucy will never forgive him for locking her up in the gatehouse after the Custodian Guards dragged her back from the Chapel, where she and Simon had secretly gone to get married.
Gringe is not a big fan of the Heap family. Gringe does not trust Wizards, he thinks that Magyk is “an easy way out of yer troubles” and he also had no end of problems with the high-spirited Heap boys playing Chicken on the drawbridge when they were little. When he asked Silas Heap to stop them, Silas just laughed and told him, “Boys will be boys.” After Lucy attempted to elope with Simon Heap, Gringe’s dislike of the Heaps increased.
But since Gringe realized that Silas did not approve of Simon either and saw how worried he and Sarah were about their children, he has felt some sympathy for the Heaps. The turning point came when Gringe found out that Silas had a Magyk set of Counter-Feet (Gringe’s favorite game and his one exception to his dislike of Magyk). Gringe has now decided that Silas Heap is not so bad after all, although when asked by this biographer if they were friends, he refused to answer and went off to yell at the Bridge Boy.
THEODORA GRINGE
Known to all as Mrs. Gringe, Theodora has been the driving force behind the Gringe family’s reversal in fortune. When the family was existing in their ramshackle shelter below the Castle wall, it was Theodora who told Gringe that the Bridge Boy had had a terrible accident and he must get down there right now and lend a hand. Gringe did not see why he should, but Mrs. Gringe did. And she was right.
Mrs. Gringe looks after the accounts at the gatehouse and makes sure the money is clean before it is put in the gatehouse coffers. Once a month she supervises its transport to the Castle Treasury, where Gringe’s salary is paid and the rest of the money is used for repairing the Castle wall and maintaining the bridge.
Now that her children have—to her regret—left home, Mrs. Gringe has started the Café la Gringe. It has, however, not been well-reviewed in the influential Egg-on-Toast Restaurant Guide. Mrs. Gringe may still find herself washing more money than knives and forks.
THE North Gate
HOW TO GET THERE: From outside the Castle, head south from the One Way Bridge toward the Castle. From within the Castle, follow the streets North; it is well signposted.
WHO LIVES THERE: The Gringe family lives in the gatehouse. The Bridge Boy works there from sunrise to sunset.
WHY YOU’D GO THERE: To get into the Castle—and to get out again.
WHY YOU WOULDN’T: You might not want to pay the toll—in which case, you would have to go in through the South Gate just past the rubbish dump.
THE ABSOLUTELY TOP-SECRET SEVEN-YEAR DIARY OF LUCY GRINGE
Year One
SPRING
MONDAY. Boring dance class today. Mum says I have to go. But WHY?
TUESDAY. Class yesterday not so bad. Met this boy called Simon. He’s nice.
MONDAY. Asked Simon his name. He said Simon. I said (ha ha) I know that I mean what is you r second name and he said Heap. I said you can’t mean that and he said yes I do mean that what is the problem and I said my dad thinks you Heaps are nuts. But what I really meant was that I want to keep seeing Simon and I know that Dad will go crazy. What will I do?
Year Two
SUMMER
SATURDAY. Met Simon this afternoon at our secret place. It is across the One Way Bridge. No one knows. I love him.
Year Five
WINTER
THURSDAY. The Heaps have left! Everyone is talking about it. AND SI HAS GONE WITH THEM. I can’t believe it! How could he go and not tell me?
SUNDAY. Woke up this morning before dawn. Thought it was raining as I heard pattering on the windows. But the rain was Si! He was throwing little stones at my window. How romantic is that? So I went downstairs really quietly as I knew that Dad would be up any minute. Si had such a big smile when he saw me! He asked me to marry him and I said yes yes YES! So we went to the Chapel and we waited until it was open and it was my dream come true. Except it didn’t. It was horrible. There was a CRASH and the Custodian Guards rushed in. They took Si away even though he punched at least THREE of them and they brought me home. Mum and Dad went crazy. I have never heard such a racket. Now Dad has locked me in the attic because I told him I was going to rescue Simon and I didn’t care what happened to me SO THERE. Mum and Dad are horrible. The Custodian Guards are horrible. EVERYONE is horrible. Except for Si. Ooo oo oo oo oo oo oo h.
WHAT DAY IS IT? I don’t know. I don’t care. I have a rat up here and it is my only friend. I am feeding it biscuits.
ANOTHER BORING DAY. Mum came and tried to talk to me, but I ignored her. Was too busy embroidering my tunic to bother with HER. My only friend is my rat. He is called Stanley and he talks enough for anyone. Who needs stupid parents anyway?
SPRING
MONDAY. Dad said I can come out of the attic. Told him I liked the attic and I didn’t want to SO THERE and he could just GO AWAY. So he left the door open and then as he was going he said something AWFUL. He said that Simon has disappeared in the Marshes and we won ’t ever see him again. I don ’t believe him. Dad is SO horrible. From now on I shall not call him Dad, I shall call him Father (which I know he hates).
Year Six
SUMMER
Had a huge fight with Mum on the drawbridge. And with Father too. Simon ’s little brother came and said that Si had kidnapped Princess Jenna. At first I was just so happy that Si is still alive! It has been so long since I heard anything. But why didn’t he come and kidnap me? WHY? I am SO unhappy.
AUTUMN
TUESDAY. Princess Jenna came here today! She gave me a beautiful blue cloak and said that Simon had meant for me to have it. I didn’t know what to say. I know all the bad stuff they have been saying about Si kidnapping Jenna and trying to kill Marcia and all that, but I don ’t believe it. Jenna wouldn’t have come to see me if he had kidnapped her, would she? And she was really nice too.
* * *
My own
Lucy,
This cloak is for you. I will be back soon and we will be together at the top of the Tower. I shall make you proud of me.
Wait for me.
Your only,
Simon.
* * *
Found this in the cloak. I am SO happy!!!!!
AUTUMN
THURSDAY. Where IS he? I have waited forever and he has still not come. I AM SO MAD. Have woven some ribbons.
FRIDAY. Had another argument with Father who told me to “stop mooning around like a sick ferret and do something.” So I am
GOING to do something. I am going to find Simon! I don’t know where he is, but I figure the Port is a good place to start. I shall take the Outside Path tonight and then there is no chance of meeting Dad Father on his way to see silly old Silas Heap. Goodbye, horrible Castle!!!
MONDAY. Arrived at the Port in Nicko Heap’s boat. The Heaps are oka
y really. Even Septimus is not a bad kid although he did say some rotten stuff about Simon. And Nicko reminds me so much of Si—something about the way he laughs. Am working at the Harbor and Dock Pie Shop for Maureen and Kevin. They are both really nice.
FRIDAY. Tons of rats here. Am sure one of them is that Message Rat I fed in the attic. I wonder if he knows where Si is?
SATURDAY. It IS Stanley. I am SURE he knows where Simon is! He keeps going on about it being “top secret,” but I shall get him to tell me eventually. I have a motto now: “No One Says No to Lucy Gringe!"
THE Message Rat Office
EAST GATE LOOKOUT TOWER
HOW TO GET THERE: Located in the East Gate Lookout Tower. Take the steps by the Manuscriptorium up to the path along the Wall and, keeping the Moat on your right, the tower is about a ten minute walk. When you can smell garbage, you are there.
WHO WORKS THERE: Stanley. No other rats are employed at present, but there are vacancies.
WHAT YOU’LL FIND THERE: A sign on the door that reads:
RATS WANTED FOR MESSAGE RAT DUTIES NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY FULL TRAINING WILL BE GIVEN APPLY WITHIN
And another that reads: