by N. Alleman
A familiar voice suddenly screeches over the top of mine from somewhere beyond the kitchen. A voice that I’ve been waiting to hear for a very long time.
“What the fuck? What the hell’s going on here?”
I run into the front room, dying to see my sister, and I force everything else into a little box in the back of my mind. I need to prioritize, and right now, Karen is at the top of my list.
She walks through the door, pissed as hell that uninvited guests are in her home. I grin to myself, glad to see this side of my sister is back. I spent my entire life hiding in her sassy shadow, and it was heartbreaking to see that side of her slowly vanish under Manny’s spell.
“Karen?” I almost whisper.
She spins around to face me, shock plastered all over her face. “Daisy? Oh, fuck!”
She rushes over to me, arms wide open, ready to embrace me in a hug. I’m more than willing to fall against her, to let her wrap me up in her arms—after all, it’s what I’ve been aiming for, for a very long time. But instead, I remain stopped dead in the middle of the room, completely unable to stop staring at her. She looks different.
Very different. Her skin seems to have a glow to it, and she has a large, rounded stomach.
“You’re pregnant?”
“Yes.” She smiles, rubbing her belly. “You couldn’t tell last time I saw you, it was too early to tell.”
“How long?” I say before my eyes settle on the man standing behind Karen in a protective stance.
It’s Lucas. I recognize him from the photographs, but he has no idea who I am. I’m in his apartment with Jake, and he hasn’t said a word.
I lift up my hand in a shy half-wave toward him, and he nods stiffly. His body language is all centered toward my sister, and I’m happy to see that. He’s clearly in love with Karen and will do anything to ensure that she’s safe, and that’s good enough for me.
“I’m seven months along now.” She smiles brightly, her tears starting to dry up. She’s clearly over the moon to be having this baby, and I’m overwhelmed with happiness for her. It looks like her life is finally coming together. “Lucas and I can’t wait to meet our little man, can we?”
She smiles lovingly in her boyfriend’s direction, and that’s when the strip club’s owner’s words come back to haunt me. I can’t forget she’s involved in something dangerous.
Karen can clearly tell from my expression that my thoughts have turned more serious, because she asks a question that opens up the can of worms.
“How did you find me?”
She sits and indicates for me to move next to her, and I collapse onto the seat and grab her hand, grateful for the warmth of her skin next to mine. Jake and Lucas awkwardly find somewhere to sit as well.
It’s an odd situation for the pair of them, but right now I don’t care. This isn’t about them. It’s about me and Karen reuniting and getting everything out in the open. That’s where it needs to be if we’re ever going to move forward.
“I went to the club where you work.” I feel shy as I say this, because I know she isn’t going to like it.
“Well, obviously, no one could tell you much. I haven’t been there for a while,” she says with a grin, gesturing to her swollen belly.
“No.” I choose my next words carefully. “Karma told me that you were with Lucas. I had to speak to the club owner to find out more.”
“You spoke to Ryder?” Her tone is stern now, as if she’s about to scold me.
“Yes. He warned me to keep away, and he obviously didn’t want to tell me anything.”
I’m trying to defend him, though I’m not sure why.
“No, no, it’s okay. He probably should’ve kept his mouth shut, but I’m glad you’re here. Really.”
She looks worried.
“I wanted to let you know it was safe myself, but we’re going through some stuff, and I didn’t want you involved. Let’s just say Ryder isn’t my biggest fan at the moment,” she admits with a small laugh.
She seems distracted, as if this isn’t really what’s bothering her. “How?” she finally asks, looking directly at me.
“How what?” There are so many questions that start with this word, and I have no idea what she means.
“How did you get to speak to Ryder?”
Oh shit, that’s the last question I wanted to hear.
“I…”
“She auditioned,” Jake interrupts me, clearly wanting to move this conversation along. “She danced and got invited to his office.”
Oh God, is he still pissed about that?
“Right.” Karen is obviously a little stunned at his admission. “I’m sorry, you are…?”
“This is my friend, Jake,” I say, jumping in quickly. I’m not really sure that I’m ready to go down the whole ‘he might have murdered Manny’ route just yet.
“I know you girls have a lot of catching up to do,” Jake continues, ignoring my obvious hints. “But there’s a lot of stuff that we really need to talk about as a priority.”
“Okay.” Karen wrings her hands nervously. “Yes, yes, you’re right.”
“Karen?” I ask, trying to draw her attention back to me. “Maybe you should start by telling me what’s been going on since I last saw you?”
She grips my hands tighter. “I’m so sorry he was there that night,” she whispers. I shake my head, trying to hide my tears, but a stray one makes its way down my cheeks.
“It doesn’t matter,” I say in a strained tone. “All that matters is we’re both here.”
“I’d broken up with Manny months before, but he wouldn’t let it go. Lucas and I had already been together for a while. I was already pregnant, but he kept coming for me.” She sighs deeply, a troubled expression on her face, and I gulp down a ball of fear that’s lodged in my throat. “When I sent you away that night, I really thought he was going to kill me.”
At these words, Lucas jumps up from his seat and walks out of the room. He clearly can’t stand to hear about this, which is understandable. That bastard Manny nearly killed his girlfriend and could’ve also made her lose his child.
Karen watches him leave but doesn’t move to follow him. “I only managed to escape by chance. But then he came for me again.” She glances toward the kitchen, toward Lucas. “I mean, he really came for me.”
Tears fill her eyes, and she gulps with sobs. “He was threatening me. Told me that he was coming for you, and he hit me. He hit me more than once.”
I gasp, wondering how much damage Manny has actually done to my sister over time. I glance over at Jake’s strained face.
“Some man in a leather jacket pulled him off me, which gave me the chance to escape. I ran inside the strip club and hid out in Ryder’s office. He looked after me then. Despite what he is, he is a good guy.”
Karen sighs, looking down at her lap. “Ryder and I used to … well, be involved. And when I met Lucas, I broke it off, and he didn’t take it well. He refused to help me with this, and I guess I’m getting to the point of the whole story now. You need to know why I wanted you to stay away.”
My heart is pounding, and I feel a little nauseated. I don’t know how to cope with all of this. It’s too much. Everything links together, but I just haven’t quite figured out how yet.
“Lucas went out to try to get rid of Manny, to tell him to leave me alone forever. Only Manny went at him with a knife. The knife that was meant for me, for my baby. Things got out of hand. Lucas didn’t mean to do it, I know he didn’t, but he accidentally killed Manny.”
“He did what?” Jake’s voice is icy cold.
Lucas makes his way back into the room then. If he expects us to judge him for what he did that night, he’s wrong. Clearly, Manny was a fucking psychopath, and what happened was self-defense. The only thing I’m judging him for is hiding and standing idly by while the cops try to stitch up Jake for something he didn’t do.
Karen grabs my hand much tighter. “I know murder is wrong, but it wasn’t like that. He
would have killed me. He would have killed you too.”
“No, I know. I don’t…” There’s something else that’s troubling me, something that has nothing to do with what Lucas did. “If Lucas killed Manny, then why the hell are the police hunting you for it, Jake?”
“What?” Karen says, turning toward Jake and really looks at him for the first time. “You’re the guy who is being blamed … oh fuck, oh my god, I…”
“Why?” Lucas asks in his deep, booming voice. “Why you?”
We all turn to face Jake.
He takes a deep breath.
17
Jake
I can’t fucking believe it. This whole time, while I’ve been running for my life from the cops, the real killer has been sitting right here in this apartment … with Daisy’s sister, no less. Jesus.
Thanks, Lucas. Thanks a fucking lot.
They all look at me with expectant expressions on their faces, and my mind flashes back to that dreadful night.
It was just a normal night, a few months back. I was out with some of my biker buddies. You know, the ones you call up when you want to get fucked up and have a fun night out.
We scoured all the nearby bars and didn’t really want to hit up a nightclub filled with underage girls, so we decided to go to Pussies Galore. Much to my surprise, it was filled with almost as many chicks as dudes. There was even a bachelorette party going on, which was weird, but great for the horny, drunk state that I was in.
I quickly spotted a fun-loving, easy-looking girl and started to work my charm on her. She responded quickly, as eager to hook up as I was. Before I’d even bought her a drink, she’d stuck her tongue down my throat and was cupping my dick on the outside of my jeans.
I didn’t even care about where we fucked, I just wanted to get to it. It’s not every day you find a chick willing to go at it in public with a stranger, so when a single guy comes across this rare beauty, it’s their duty to take full advantage.
If I think about it now, I can’t even remember what she looked like. A little trashy. Drunk, soulless eyes. I do recall her skimpy black skirt, but that’s about it.
We rushed out into the alleyway, deciding that the bathrooms were going to be too busy for us to get at it. Before I’d even gotten to grab one of her tits, we were distracted by yelling.
In my alcohol-fueled rage, I instantly went to check it out, wanting to puff out my chest and be a hero. The slutty girl was shouting behind me, but my mind was already elsewhere. I saw some dickhead pounding on some girl, and there was no way in hell I was going to let her be assaulted, so I dragged him away from her.
I now realize that this was Karen and Manny, but I didn’t even bother to look at her. I simply waited until I heard her run away, and then I began to rain punches down on him. I punched and kicked more than I should’ve done. I kept seeing him in my mind’s eye beating up some innocent girl, and I couldn’t let that pass me by.
To be honest, I was internalizing all sorts of other shit as well, and it all came out at that moment. My life had been slowly descending into hell for a very long time. I’d been drinking far too much to try to deal with my rage and frustration, but that was just a vicious cycle that led to more shit in my life.
I was stuck in a rut, and that was the moment that changed it all. Obviously, it wasn’t the best moment of my life—I’m certainly not proud of it, but it dragged me from the fog I’d been existing under. It made me feel everything and finally deal with it.
In a way, it actually made me ready to meet Daisy … not that I’d ever say that part out loud.
Finally, the scream of the girl I’d intended to fuck against a grubby wall shook me out of my enraged state, and I stopped attacking. Manny was practically unconscious by that point anyway, although he was one-hundred percent still alive. I know this for a fact, because he muttered “fuck you” through his bloodied gums as I stalked away.
I looked around for my one-night stand. My jagged, blood-soaked knuckles were the only damage to my body, and I felt pumped and ready to go. A nice quickie would have gone down quite well at that moment, but she was nowhere to be found.
Instead, I found some of my buddies outside smoking, so I puffed away on a cigarette too. Then we moved on and enjoyed the rest of our night. I may not have gotten my dick wet, but the rest of the night had been a good one.
Then the morning arrived.
I’d woken up on my buddy’s floor with a damn hangover.
My friend’s voice boomed from the kitchen only a moment later. “Holy fuck, what have you done, Jake? You’re on the goddamned TV!”
I staggered into where he was sitting, desperately trying to remember what idiotic drunk and disorderly behavior I’d gotten up to, but I drew a blank. How much had I had to drink? Why did I always have to get so wild?
I watched my name rolling across the news report on the screen. They were saying I’d murdered someone. Finally, there was one thing from the previous night that I could remember, and it was beating that dickhead to a pulp.
I definitely didn’t kill him, though.
“No, no!” I said, desperate for my friend to believe me. “I didn’t kill that prick, he was still alive when I left him.”
My friend was still amused, still disbelieving. “Well, the police sure as shit think that you did it. You’d better run, dude.”
I got the hell out of there and went on the run. I stayed in the city because I imagined the police were expecting me to run elsewhere, and I’ve learned that it’s much easier to hide in plain sight.
My name became increasingly attached to the murder, and the more the media demonized me, the more I had to hide.
I told Daisy, Karen, and Lucas a cleaned-up version of events from that night, and it felt good to let it out.
I’ve been bottling all of it up even more than I realized.
I told Daisy some of it, but I certainly hadn’t gone into any detail.
I’m glad that now I know the truth about what really happened, because part of me still blamed myself.
My memory of beating Manny up and leaving him alive seemed crystal-clear, but alcohol played a massive part in that night. There’s no denying that. Plus, it helps that Karen and Lucas know the truth now.
I hated that there was clearly a small element of doubt there, however rational it was.
Now there might really be a chance for me and Daisy.
18
Daisy
I take a second to try to absorb this information. I’d been hanging my hopes on the fact that the police would eventually find the real killer, allowing Jake to remain free, but now that I know who the killer really is, that fantasy has been crushed into nothing.
Even though Lucas hasn’t come forward to the police and admitted he is guilty, I don’t want him to go to jail any more than I want Jake behind bars. Not when he’s been taking such good care of my sister.
So now I sit between two men. One a killer and the other innocent but blamed. And there’s not a damn thing I can do about it. If I turn Lucas in, my sister will lose her baby’s father.
I rack my brains, praying for a solution, but it remains frustratingly blank.
What the hell can we do now?
We can’t just do nothing.
I shoot a glance toward Karen, who’s as dazed and confused as I feel. I was hoping she would have all the answers, but I was wrong.
Damn. This situation seems pretty hopeless.
I look over at Jake. I want to catch his eye, but his stare is fixed firmly on his feet.
My heart goes out to him, and I want to tightly wrap my arms around him, but I don’t. He’s clearly dealing with his own wave of emotions, and I get the impression that he isn’t the type of guy who opens up readily. He deals with his shit in his own way.
“Okay, we can’t just sit here,” Lucas booms across the room once more. “We have to do something about this. I’ve gotta make this right, but I can’t go away for this. I’ve gotta be here for my kid when
he’s born.”
He looks at Jake like he’s afraid he’ll get punched. “I’m sorry you got caught up in this mess, Jake, is it? I’ll do anything to help out.”
Lucas runs his hand through his hair over and over again.
The more I get to know him, the more convinced I am that it was all a big mistake. Lucas didn’t mean to kill Manny.
The guy may be tall, muscular, and strong, but he’s a gentle giant.
He doesn’t look like he would have a dangerous bone in his body. In fact, he probably only became a bouncer to protect people—I could never imagine him throwing his weight around in the way that some overly-macho guys do.
And now his main priority is my sister and their unborn child.
“Any ideas?” I finally ask in a meek voice.
Silence hangs heavily over our heads. I can tell Jake is thinking ‘let’s turn him in’, but that’s not really an option. We can’t be responsible for making my sister’s baby grow up without a father.
“Maybe,” Karen says before tightly sealing her lips again.
“Go on.” I smile, coaxing the answer out of her. If she has an idea, we need to hear it.
“I think maybe we should go and speak to Ryder. I know that might seem weird to you because he comes across as such a sleaze, but he’s very resourceful.”
“By resourceful, do you mean dangerous?” I ask. We’re in some deep shit here. I’m not sure that going deeper into the rabbit hole is a good idea.
“I guess so, but I can’t think of anything else, and it doesn’t seem like any of you can either. Maybe dangerous is what we need. Maybe he’s all that can help us right now.”
I balk. Surely there has to be another answer. This can’t possibly be our only option.
“I know he isn’t my biggest fan, but he seems to like you, Daisy,” Karen points out.
“I think you’re right.” Lucas nods, sending my heart even further into the ground.
Karen makes the final decision for the rest of us. She’s always had a clever way of doing that.