Things That Should Stay Buried

by Casey L. Bond

  “Let me get your mom ready first,” she said, spinning to hug Mom’s neck and telling her how glad she was to finally meet her. Mom glowed from Helena’s sweet words. She glowed even more when Helena picked out a dark gold gown that absolutely glittered when the sun hit it.

  “This is beautiful, but I’m not sure it would fit.”

  Helena nodded. “It fits, I promise. Just try it on.”

  I motioned toward the library and she ducked inside, an excited squeal escaping her throat.

  “She’s great,” Helena whispered.

  “I know.”

  Mom opened the door and her smile said more than words could.

  “Wow!” I exclaimed, walking toward her. “You look amazing, Mom!”

  “Thank you,” she said, raking a hand over her stomach. “I feel amazing in it.”

  Helena lightly powdered her face, adding a dusting of rose-colored blush and some gold highlighter here and there. She added a layer of mascara and a dusting of taupe shadow. With a swipe of sheer gloss, she was ready.

  “Now,” Helena said, “it’s your turn.” She grabbed a gown off the rack and ordered me into the library. “It’s backless,” she whispered. “For your wings.”

  “You are literally the best.”

  She grinned. “I miss you.”

  “I miss you, too.” I truly did. We had become fast friends under some very strange and dire conditions, but weren’t the best and strongest friendships forged in fire?

  She helped me step into the gown and secured it so it wouldn’t budge. Even though it looked like it wouldn’t, it held its shape and never drooped. The fabric was sheer, bright gold with small stars embroidered throughout. While there were no sleeves, two tiny swaths of thin silk tied over my biceps and fell to my wrists, a star attached to the end of each string.

  She hustled out of the room and grabbed a pair of flats and placed them in front of me. “I know you’d heal fast if you turned an ankle, but why risk it when you finally get to enjoy yourself for a night?” Her logic was as sound as her fashion prowess.

  My hair had changed a little over the past few days. The dark colorant she’d applied had gradually leached away and every strand was a varying shade of brown to match my feathers. I used the texturizer she’d given me before and mussed it so the strands were separated but still looked styled. She applied foundation, peach blush dotted with gold highlighter, and a dramatic, dark brown eyeshadow.

  “Do you want to go a step bolder with your makeup?”

  My brows kissed in confusion. “What do you mean?”

  “Do you trust me?”

  “Of course I do.”

  “Shut your eyes.”

  As soon as she began to draw the marks, a slash through each eye, I knew what she meant.

  “His pledge to you was apparent, and now, perhaps it’s time you made a pledge to him and claim him as yours in front of some of the others. The Zodia can be quite territorial.”

  “I’m a Lark; not exactly a bird of prey.”

  She shook her head and laughed. “You are exactly that. They’ve all seen what you’re capable of. Don’t forget it, either.”

  Mom gasped when she took in the crimson marks. “Larken….” I was about to explain the significance because I couldn’t remember if I’d mentioned them before or not. “Those will definitely make a statement to Aries tonight.” She smiled and tears shimmered in her eyes. “You aren’t a child anymore.”

  “I wasn’t a child for a long time, Mom.”

  “But you were mine,” she cried, “and now you’re eighteen. I can’t believe it.”

  Helena gave me a sad look and handed me a few tissues. She grabbed her cart and wiggled her fingers to wave goodbye. I mouthed the words thank you from over Mom’s shoulder before Helena disappeared.

  My family met under Kestrel’s tree.

  Knowing I’d be worried about leaving without someone I trusted to watch over things, Aries asked Helena to guard my territory for the night. I left her on the balcony reclined in one of the white plastic chairs, a glass of wine in her hand. I knew she would alert me if there was trouble, so my heart was a little lighter as I walked across the lawn with Mom.

  “Did I ever tell you how I picked your names?” she asked out of the blue.

  “No. I guess I just assumed you had a thing for birds.”

  She laughed. “I’ve always liked them, but they seemed fitting. A kestrel is one of the smallest birds of prey. When Kestrel was born, he was tiny and clawing for life.”

  “Why Larken?” I asked, looking over at her. Silver strands coursed through her hair now. Though we looked a lot alike, I could see the effects of time on her body in the crow’s feet at the corners of her eyes and wrinkles on the skin of her hands, no longer supple.

  “Larks were always my favorite. When your father and I bought the house after we got married, he built a bird feeder for me as a housewarming gift. I used to love to sit on the porch and sip my coffee in the mornings and stay very still while the birds came up. A little brown lark visited me every day, and she sang the prettiest song. She was so delicate and tiny, but her voice was powerful. When we were thinking about what to name you both, yours came easily. We had a long list of ideas for Kestrel, but nothing we wrote down seemed to fit. One morning, a man stopped by and said he’d noticed my feeder and the little lark sitting on the ledge. He was from the Audubon society and asked if he could wait in the yard and take pictures. Your dad was ready to run him off,” she laughed. “He thought the man was a burglar. But his eyes were kind and he had an enormous camera. Beyond that, he wore a beret. Burglars do not wear berets,” she said adamantly. “So I told him he was welcome to photograph the birds in the yard. When I came home that evening from work, he was gone, but he stopped by a few weeks later to show me some of the pictures and bring me a special print. In it, a kestrel was swooping down toward the feeder when the lark caught sight of him and rose, puffing her tiny chest out. She looked like she would tear him to shreds if he bothered her food. In that moment I knew… that was what your names had to be.”

  It seemed fitting. Kestrel and I had always seemed like opponents, even if I didn’t understand why.

  “Thanks for telling me that, Mom.”

  “Well, I know I don’t need to give you advice on how to handle yourself, but if you ever see that Libra bitch again, you should grab her and fly as high as you can and drop her.”

  My mouth gaped. “Language!” I laughed, playfully chastising her.

  Mom shrugged. “It’s just my two cents.”

  I didn’t know how Kestrel’s grave became a meeting place, but I was glad it was. It may have seemed morbid to others, but he was the hinge that connected our family. So many people, once dead, were forgotten. We would never forget Kestrel. We would see his grave often, and remember.

  When they heard our footsteps on the grass, Dad and Kes turned around.

  They both looked handsome in black suits with crisp white shirts and black bowties. Dad couldn’t tear his eyes off Mom, which made her blush like a schoolgirl. I imagined him with cartoonish, bulging heart eyes and a tongue that unfurled like a red carpet.

  Kes held his elbow out for Mom. She took it, still staring at Dad as I offered him my arm. “It’s the other way around,” he corrected, holding his elbow out for me.

  I threaded my arm through it and laid my head on his shoulder for a second, thankful beyond words for them. My family didn’t treat me differently. They weren’t afraid. They accepted the changes in me as part of the package and went on like they didn’t exist.

  “Ready?” Kes asked.

  I nodded, seeking the cord that felt like gold, and pulled us to Aquarius. We appeared in the entrance to a grand ballroom with a ceiling painted like a star-studded sky, bracketed by trees that boasted gilded leaves. The walls were gold filigree, while the floors
were solid gold tiles. The room was filled with women draped in gold with gold leaf applied to their hands and arms like gloves. Some had even added golden glitter to their hair and shimmer to their skin.

  Aquarius rose from his seat at the head of a table situated across the room on a raised dais. On each side of the room, two twin streams flowed from the dais, each bisected by small, golden bridges that arched across the stream. We crossed over one of the bridges and stepped into the room.

  The musicians stopped playing their soft strains and every eye turned from Aquarius to us.

  “Larken,” he greeted. Then he balled his fist and banged his chest. I let go of my father and prepared to greet him the same way, when Scorpio entered the room and approached us. His obsidian body was like a shadow amongst the sunny décor. He banged his fist on his chest as Capricorn appeared beside him. She approached, rearing her head back like she was going to head-butt me, but landed the softest brush of her forehead against mine. She pounded her chest once before stepping away to reveal Aries, resplendent in a tunic of midnight blue, with my star sign threaded across his chest.

  His breath hitched when his eyes raked over the blood-like slashes over my eyes. Then his fingers stretched out and curled in on themselves again. The muscle in his jaw began to tick. Suddenly, I didn’t care who was in the room with us. I tucked in my wings and ran to him. He caught me easily and drew my face up to meet his. “Beautiful,” he whispered before claiming my lips with a rough, sweet kiss.

  Aquarius chuckled and the music that stopped playing when we walked in began again. Aquarius’s guests resumed their dancing, though everyone seemed to watch us.

  I kissed Aries until my lips stung, and when I pulled away, remembered my family was somewhere in the room.

  “They’re at the table being seated with Aquarius. We should probably join them,” Aries rasped, pressing his forehead to mine.

  “I want to. But I don’t want to.”

  He chuckled. “I understand completely.”

  He brought my hands up and placed a sweet kiss on the back of each one before drawing me toward the dais. “Dinner can’t begin without the guest of honor.”

  I ticked my head back. “Guest of…” My chest constricted. “This is for me?”

  Aquarius laughed, gesturing to the empty seats at his right hand. “Of course it is. Not only are you responsible for ridding the world of a bullish tyrant, a little bird,” he flicked a look at Kes, “has indicated that it is your eighteenth birthday.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh. “Thank you, Aquarius.”

  He nodded, flicking his eyes appreciatively over my gold dress, over the gilded room, and everything that glinted within it.

  My family, my love, and our allies ate a sumptuous feast of venison, steaming hot vegetables, palm-sized crusted bread loaves, and tiny sugared cakes. The cakes were delicious and something I decided we needed in my territory. We’d been in the reactionary mode of correcting Taurus’s mistakes, but maybe it was time to create things that brought happiness, as well.

  After dinner, we danced. Aquarius asked me for the first one, during which he teased me about the amount of sexual tension between me and Aries, how he was jealously watching Aquarius’s every move, even the position of his fingers on my back to make sure none wandered. “He was so tense the night we dined with Virgo when you entered the room in the teal dress with the golden beads, that he almost snapped the table in two. Did you hear it?”

  My eyes widened. “Was that what that noise was?”

  Aquarius’s eyes glittered. “So consider this dance a favor. He won’t leave your side the rest of the night.”

  As he led me around the dance floor, I searched for Aries, who watched us with keen eyes from the dais. My skin flushed. “Won’t other people want to dance with one of us?” I asked. Not that I cared to dance with anyone but Aries.

  “They will want to, but Aries won’t allow it. And I have a feeling that neither will you.”

  My eyes locked onto the dais where Capricorn had stood and was holding a delicate hand out to Aries.

  My heart quickened. I watched the two descend the steps and start swaying to the music, and while they remained at a respectable distance, I hated the sight of his hands on her fur. I hated her hands on his chest, resting at his neck.

  She’s an ally, I reminded myself.

  A friend.

  Not a threat.

  “Easy,” Aquarius soothed. “They are only friends. Just as you and I are friends. Nothing more.”

  When the music stopped and before a new song began, Aquarius led me across the floor. My legs trembled, so I relied on my wings to carry me there, my feet almost dragging the floor. Gasps arose as we approached Capricorn and Aries. Capricorn smiled sagely and waved me toward Aries, whose stare was feral.

  His claws sank deliciously into the flesh at my hips as he drew me to the floor. When the first notes of music began, he fit his body so tightly to mine, not even air could fit between us. We swayed together to a dangerous, sultry song that set my blood on fire and made my heart sing.

  He felt like steel and bone and his cinnamon scent wrapped around me like a tantalizing caress. I felt like I was hovering again, but I couldn’t be sure. My wings were tucked tightly to my back, but I still felt lighter than air.

  “I want to see them fanned out,” he whispered in my ear. “I want to see you lying on my dark sheets, wings spread, your lips parted…”

  I almost melted. “What are we waiting for?”

  “You can’t leave your own party,” he tutted.

  “The hell I can’t.”

  I walked up to the table and thanked Aquarius for the beautiful evening as Aries smirked behind me. I went to Kes next. He promised to bring Mom and Dad back. The two were dancing like they were at a 1960s prom, her head on his chest, eyes closed. He kissed her temple and closed his.

  “Go,” Kes shooed us away. “You two are making everyone sick.”

  I guffawed. “We are not.”

  He quirked an argumentative, rude brow, but refrained from responding.

  Aries waited in the center of the floor. When did he move over there? I smiled and appeared in front of him, only to see him vanish again. I bit my lip, determined to find him. I searched along the threads to find the one that tethered him to me and pulled... hard. He appeared in front of me with a shocked look on his face. “How did you do that?”

  Couldn’t he tug the cord instead of just following it? I gave him a fake, puzzled look and conjured my best Reese Witherspoon / Legally Blonde voice. “What, like it’s hard?”

  His eyes smoldered. “That’s a trick you’ll have to teach me.”

  “Only if you teach me a few first…” I challenged.

  “Gladly,” he rasped, stalking toward me with a predatory gleam in his eye.

  Just then, a loud boom shook Aquarius’s palace. I whirled, taking to the air, my hair feeling like it was standing on end. My feathers sharply cleaved the air. I landed with my back to Aries, both of us whirling and searching for the threat.

  Aquarius stood and let out a belting laugh. “Number one, that was thunder. And secondly, Larken, you are always more than anyone expects, aren’t you?”

  What?

  He gestured to me. I looked down at my stomach and peered at my dress, then caught sight of the tips of my wings. They were no longer feathered, but bladed, each sharp edge glinting in the golden light that spilled throughout the room. I sucked in a breath. Why did they change?

  “They’re protective,” Aries marveled as he turned to inspect them. His fingertip welled with blood when he dragged it over the honed tip of a feather. “And sharp.”

  I brought his finger to my mouth and kissed the tip even as it healed. “Aries?”

  His brow furrowed. He heard me, but his eyes clung to my lips.

  “Aries?” I sa
id again. Finally, his eyes shifted to mine. I split my palm with my claw and let my blood well in my hand, a question burning in my mind and in my eyes. Aries approached and closed his eyes. “I accept.”

  I swallowed and drew my pledge in the form of slashes over his eyes. Slashes that matched the ones I wore for him, the pledge he made to me.

  My blood didn’t eat his flesh away. He opened his eyes and their pink depths burned for me. “I will protect you for as long as I draw breath,” he vowed.

  “And I will protect you for as long as my heart beats.”

  He nodded. The other Zodia, my parents, and Kes watched our exchange from their places around the room. Tears swam in my mom’s eyes and my dad pursed his lips but gave me a small nod.

  My feathers softened. I felt the tension slip out of them the way the fear had oozed out of me.

  Kes offered a proud smile and the other Zodia beat on their chests. When Aries smiled, it lit up the room. Then he swept me off my feet and carried me across the small bridge, out of the ballroom and to the front door where we dissolved together.

  We reappeared in my bedroom, startling Helena, who took one look at us, grinned, and vanished with a saucy wink.

  We took time to finally give ourselves to one another in every way possible. Aries taught me how much he loved every inch of me, and I learned how every chiseled inch of him felt beneath my fingers.

  Aries showed me how much he’d been holding back, and I demonstrated for him how strong I was now.

  The next day, when we met the morning sun as she rose above the horizon, he sat in one of the plastic chairs with me draped across his lap, his fingers rubbing lazy circles on my arm. “I love you, Larken.”

  “I love you more.”

  He laughed. “Anything is possible under the heavens… except that.”

  My heart swelled. Maybe that was what surprised me the most. Though I’d changed so much, my heart still felt very human.

  I’d thought becoming Zodia was impossible. I’d thought that if pitted against Taurus, I would lose. But when I overcame him and became the thing I feared most, it turned out not to be as scary as I imagined. Maybe it was because my family was whole, or maybe it was because my heart was still mine.