by Cat Oars
I love < mumblemumble > 2004-09-29 16:29:00
Dead squirrel as live chimp – love it.
May have been suggested < Whatabouta > 2004-09-29 14:09:22
Helper monkey for the disabled? I don't know much about the program, but if it is similar to sight dogs he could offer to foster a chimp while it’s young. Or could convince them that he NEEDS a helper monkey...
An old man < sheisty > 09/29 13:56:30
Dropped dead in the apartment next to my father's a few years ago when my father still lived in Pentagon City. The old man had no family or friends left, so his body rotted. Neighbors complained first about the smell, and second about the ungodly shrieks that were coming from the apartment.
Eventually management stepped in and opened up the apartment. The old man had died, but his pet cockatoo was alive and well. True story. So it's not such a stretch to make it a monkey. Hell, a monkey's more believable than a goddamn cockatoo. And here in NYC, this past summer in a Harlem project apartment, a man had a pet tiger and a pet alligator.
Anyway, your character is homeless, but I think your story would work well with this traditional three-act construction. it uses IAA's ending.
Act 1: Man lives in apartment, is getting evicted. Meanwhile, racket next door. Finds monkey and leaves with monkey, thinking of monkey as his last resort, good luck charm, last true friend, etc…
Act 2: man struggles to make it just him & monkey. hijinks, troubles, worries, fill-in details, the meat of your story, etc...
Act 3: naturally, the man has been somewhat desperate and delusional from outset. Story ends with him & monkey starving to death.
I know you’re not writing a play, but a good deal of fiction follows the three-act story formula. Think it fits for what you’re trying to do here.
Sheisty-Traditional Three-Act Construction < talker >
2004-09-29 14:30:12
Sheisty..."Starving to Death" would work if I was writing a horror story and wanted to sicken or scare the reader with sick-me-out or scare-me entertainment. But I want my reader not to be sickened by "starvation" ending. Very dark entertainment for the dark minded. I like your suggestions however, the "Traditional Three-Act", but I'd work it this way: Act 1: Starving artist man lives in apartment. Landlord has warned him he may have to get evicted. Landlord has known starving artist for years, and likes him. The landlord also has a pet chimpanzee. A few days later, racket down the hall, police are on the scene, and it appears the landlord has died. Once all that is over with, reading of the will, and starving artist inherits landlord's pet chimp. Act 2: man and chimp in survival struggle. He will teach chimp to paint. He will struggle to eat, too, before any of this chimp success happens. Act 3: Naturally, the man has been somewhat desperate and delusional from outset. Story ends with monkey "sick and tired" of painting now, and monkey revenge time. Monkey has been "used", "wasn't appreciated," throws a fit, all he ever does is freakin’ paint for the dude, and he's sick of it. There will be chaos!
I know this isn't < mumblemumble > 2004-09-29 17:07:30
The story you want to write, but riffing off Vainly Jane's dead squirrel idea, what about a stuffed monkey that either a) the artist is convinced is alive, or b) he knows is stuffed, but still makes money off by convincing people it's alive. I just like the idea of someone developing an intricate relationship with a dead or stuffed/non-sentient thing. That would make the artist a different guy, but then at least he could steal a monkey from Toys ‘R' Us.
To - mumblemumble... < talker > 2004-09-30 09:02:57
If you can explain to me how to make a dead monkey or a stuffed toy monkey paint a picture … there's where I lack know-how, on getting that to work. My chimp character in the story is going to paint. However, I would not write off the idea of dead or toy monkey, if painting, something only a live or robotic chimp could perform, wasn't the criteria. If I were using a dead monkey – which looks like a new reconsideration, since there were others thinking this was a cool idea, I'd use a dead monkey for...well...what? I'd use a toy monkey for… well… hmmm? A dead monkey can lay there and make me cry. A toy monkey, I can throw it all over the place. Not sure how I'd relate with either. But you may have a better idea on that spectrum. Let me know.
well < mumblemumble > 2004-09-30 09:54:17
If you wanna go surreal (and I own that is my interest in a stuffed monkey, which probably creates an utterly different story), I'd have the mechanized stuffed monkey do (or have the artist think he can do) automatic writing a la yeats and his ouija board prophetic pals. The scribblings are said to be prophetic and people buy them the way they call in to psychic hotlines, etc. The monkey gets a serious following and the artist amasses serious cash... for a while.
To Sheisty "OK, I see what you're doing now" < talker >
2004-09-30 08:47:00
Thank you for your support and comments Sheisty... they were all very helpful. But everyone here has been helpful, and are all so much fun to talk too. Wish we could all get together for a party. If we all have jobs, call in sick, hang out and let’s start finger talking on paper! Few breaks in between for food and fun. Ah, well, fantasize I will. LOL! Getting back to the story, yes, will let you know when I'm done with it. There's really this dude (not sure if he's an artist) who has a chimp painting for him. It wouldn't surprise me if he caught on after the art community went into collection buying art painted by elephants to raise funds for elephant survival. But when I saw the chimp paint for the guy, it looked like it was sick and tired of painting, and it was banging the brush against the easel so hard, I thought the easel was going to fall. That chimpanzee also had an "I'm going mad!" look on its face too; it had a really cold stare about its eyes. That chimp in my opinion has not had a vacation for quite some time, or else, not enough rewards. But will let you know when I get done, and thank you again for your help.
News Flash! < chimpanzee_paste > 2004-09-29 16:18:45
WDC Today: This morning a homeless man came to the aid of our Mayor by agreeing to ape-sit his Honor's prize Chimpanzee. The man is said to be a starving artist. This information came from the Mayor's housekeeper, one Mrs. Stape. "I don't know what the Mayor was thinking," said Mrs. Stape. "The ape-sitter is nothing more than a good-for-nothing bum if you ask me." We asked the neighbors to confirm Mrs. Stape's opinion and found supporting views from two. Mr. Pimpletone had this to say, "Dirty, I tell you the man was dirty. I watched from between my blinds. Not to say I was spying on the big cheese, but a man has to do his civic duty. That man, the ape-sitter you called him, we don't want his kind around here." Miss Tina Twobottom, a name we all know from her stage appearence in Jarrod and Spine's production of 'Back That Thing Up,' had this to say: "Oh, he was a hottie, or would be if he ever got a job and learned to take a bath. I understand he's on the Late Show tonight. Homeless guys are so edgy. If he goes rags to riches, I'll date him!" The Mayor's office has not been available for comment, but when we asked his opposition for their views on this story they had this response: "This is a sad move, late in the game attempt, the Mayor has seen our Candidate is leading in the poles with his Enablement of the Homeless Platform and has only staged this job for a homeless artist to garnish votes."
Replying to chimpanzee_paste... < talker > 2004-09-30 08:56:08
I read your newsy flash inspiration.
Chimp on a wire < --- > 2004-09-29 19:48:07
He finds a job taking care of the chimp who is the pet of some mega-rich musician. They run away together.
To - - - "Chimp on a Wire" < talker > 2004-09-30 09:08:51
I like that idea. He wouldn't even have to be homeless either. The story could just start off that way… hmmm? Thank you for your suggestion (- - -) Get a name by the way!
Monkey Burglar? < Vainly_Jane > 2004-09-29 14:17:44
How about he just climbs up the fire escape during someone's regular work hours, develops a relationship with a monkey (a la The Little Prince) teaches the monkey how to escape its environment a
nd lures the monkey out?
Vainly_Jane - Monkey Burglar? < talker > 2004-09-30 09:55:41
Workable...In a starved state of mind and body, the unshaven and tattered appearing Jon walks limply on a sidewalk in New York City. Suddenly, the smell of sweet apples has him stopped and looking. Jon gazes upward and there to his eyes, he sees an apple pie cooling on a terrace window row house. "Well would ya lookie there!" "I think that pie is for me!" "Lord, Let me have that pie!" Jon runs off to climbing the metal ladder for his food reward, that in his mind, is an answer from God. He finally gets to the window terrace to take the pie, when out of the blue, a dark, long fingered, hairy, hand reaches out to Jon's thief-mind driven fingers, and gets a grab at Jon's hand. "Oh my God!" "What have I gotten myself into?" Jon says with emotion while staring directly into the eyes of a chimpanzee that was wildly shaking its head and yelling, "Haaaaaaaa!" "Haaaaaaa!" "Haaaaaaaaaa!" Jon screamed, "Let me go!" "I'll go!" "Just let me go you hairy, loudmouth, blabbering boob!" Suddenly, Jon hears a woman's voice very near suddenly speak, "He's not a boob you, you, you're a bum!" "He's my pet Chimpanzee, Babuh!" "And what are you doing at my window?" "I'll call the police on you!" Jon answered immediately, "No, please, don't do that Miss!" "Please don't do that!" "Let me explain!" COMMENT: He can have love and chimp too. LOL!
Let's all do starving artists with chimp... < ImAnAsshole >
2004-09-29 17:04:52
... stories. I'll start mine after I see Terry Gross tonight. It'll be due as they get done.
I am so there < Francais > 2004-09-29 17:23:25
I will try to do mine sometime over the weekend.
You rock, IAA. Great idea.
Nice < sheisty > 2004-09-30 07:05:42
Mine will be finished by Monday.
But with our past ideas or ideas of others? < Vainly_Jane >
2004-09-30 09:03:51
All the parameters: starving artist, and chimp < IAAnli >
2004-09-30 10:52:28
That's all. Borrow ideas from the thread, or make up your own story. The story must include a starving artist and a chimp, that's all. P.S: Had to give away my T. Gross ticket at the last minute. Grrr. Was told it was a pretty good show though.
Notes
Contributors were “Francais” (the lost notebook, Bill’s poem, the chimp’s manuscript, the resolution); “ImAnAsshole” (Bill’s odyssey); “Sheisty” (Lenny’s dilemma); “Baldur” (the writing contest, the Multi-Verse); and “Mumblemumble” (the epiphany).
Project conceived by ImAnAsshole, during a discussion on the Craigslist Literary & Writing forum Sept. 29 and 30, 2004. Compiled and edited by Francais.
Cover art by Motoko.
Dedicated to all who have pulled for us and against us.
The Starving Artist and the Chimp was first published in Spring 2005 and became the first in the series of Cat Oars books. The books are available in paperback at lulu.
e-mail: [email protected]
Book of Desire & Regret
Black & White
Banana
Syzygy
And more to come.