Gulab Deen said, “Hope everything is going well with your routines,” as he looked around.
“Yes,” Tamami answered listlessly. “Are the preparations for the bout done?”
“Preparations! Preparations! I don’t know. To your question I would say both yes and no.”
Tamami looked up but did not ask what he meant. Since his arrest—which Kabira had hinted was orchestrated by Gulab Deen— Tamami had developed a secret dread of the promoter.
“There are problems with the bout, Tamami,” Gulab Deen continued. “I worry for you.”
A troubled look appeared on Tamami’s face, but he remained silent. He was trying to concentrate his thoughts.
“This has to be a longer fight,” Gulab Deen said. “You cannot finish it too soon. And you must cede the first fight to Sher Ali.”
Tamami sat up. “Kabira said I should not give away the fight,” he said angrily. “I am not going to let Sher Ali defeat me! No!”
“Did I ask you to cede the series?”
“I am not going to lose the fight! Kabira told me you would ask me to lose a fight one of these days. I am not going to do it!” Tamami looked impatiently towards the door. He wished Kabira were there.
“Kabira is my friend too, and his advice is always good to have, especially since he is also your manager. But I have a very good reason for arranging the bout in this manner, Tamami. That reason I can only tell you, as it concerns you alone, not Kabira.”
“What reason?”
“It has to do with what happened between you and Ustad Ramzi.”
Tamami’s expression remained tense, but he felt an anxiety mixed with eagerness.
“Brothers should not fight,” Gulab Deen continued. “My heart has been heavy since Ustad Ramzi broke his ties with you. I could not do anything. But that does not mean you should be made to suffer. Enough is enough.”
Tamami now listened attentively.
“I went to see Ustad Ramzi the other day,” Gulab Deen said. “I asked him to come and inaugurate the fight. But…” here Gulab Deen hesitated.
“But what?”
“He would not come. I said to him, Ustad Ramzi, do not bear ill will against your own brother. He would be honored to have you at the akhara when he fights. He needs your blessings, I said.”
Tamami looked expectantly at the promoter.
“But Ustad Ramzi is a stern man—and proud. He suffers, but will not change his mind. Unless…”
“Unless what?”
“Unless he knows that the title would be lost by his clan if he did not come,” Gulab Deen said slowly. A few moments passed without comment from Tamami, but the promoter carried on confidently. “You must lose the first fight. Then Ustad Ramzi will ask himself if it was because he was not there. He will see that his brother needs him. He is the way he is, but he would not willingly torment anyone. You know it as well as I do. What must be said to his credit, must be said. He is hurting, too, and he will relent when he sees that you require him to be there with you. His pride will be satisfied and he will come for the second fight. The second fight could soon follow, perhaps in a month’s time.”
“In a month’s time…?”
“In a few weeks, then,” Gulab Deen said quickly. “Ustad Ramzi will come. And once he is there, he will find it hard not to reconcile with his brother. What happened between you is a shame, but blood is thicker than water. Now is our chance to correct the error. You decide. I have not told Kabira. He may not understand. If he speaks to someone in the clan, Ustad Ramzi might find out, and then he will never come. He is a proud man. You know your brother better than I do. You tell me if he would come if he were to find out.”
Tamami remained silent.
“Tell me if there is anything I can do,” Gulab Deen said.
“Are you sure Ustad Ramzi will come?” Tamami asked. “How can you be certain?”
“Think carefully about what I have told you, then ask yourself. You will have the answer. Trust me, he will come.”
Tamami was quiet.
“There’s another thing,” Tamami said as Gulab Deen prepared to leave.
“What?”
“I haven’t had my…” Tamami began haltingly, “I feel my head will break apart if I do not…”
❖
The news spread quickly that Tamami had lost a fight to Sher Ali. It was also announced that the re-match would be held a month later. Kabira had accosted Tamami immediately after the bout, but Tamami refused to say anything.
“I feel exhausted,” he kept saying. “You know I would not throw a fight.”
When he saw that Kabira did not believe him, Tamami began arguing and broke into tears. Kabira then went to see Gulab Deen, whom he had seen quietly slip away after the fight ended.
Kabira thought Tamami’s body might be rebelling against his drug addiction. Despite his vigil in the last weeks, he had noticed that Tamami was increasingly drugged. At times he would jump out of his charpai in the middle of the night, brushing his clothes wildly, complaining of insects crawling over his body. Kabira saw that there were no insects, either on Tamami’s skin or on the charpai. Since summer, when he had kept the charpais in the sun, there had been no bedbugs either.
Sher Ali had looked strong in the akhara and was far more agile than Tamami. As Kabira was not certain that Tamami’s defeat was entirely the result of Gulab Deen’s orchestration, he was taken in by his convoluted arguments.
A rumor spread that Tamami had taken money from Sher Ali to draw the fight and that Tamami had done it to pay for his addiction. Kabira listened helplessly to the comments people made.
Kabira wondered if Ustad Ramzi would make up with Tamami, but he could not find the courage to broach the subject with him again.
❖
Ustad Ramzi remained impassive upon hearing that Tamami had lost the bout to Sher Ali. It seemed that he had either expected the news, or else he was too sad to react in any way.
He wondered despondently if addiction and the lure of money had driven Tamami to lose fights and dishonor the clan. Ustad Ramzi did not go to Gulab Deen to settle the matter with him, as some suggested. He told himself there was no point in doing so.
When a pahalwan held himself back before an opponent in an akhara, he betrayed his oath to the clay of the akhara. Tamami had broken his oath out of greed. Once faith with one’s creed had been broken, it did not stop at one disgrace; a storm of evils was bound to follow. In days to come there might be more. A canker was eating away at Tamami’s soul and it could not be carved to any perfection, Ustad Ramzi told himself.
With a final effort he shut his heart to Tamami and all thoughts of him.
Addict
Tamami’s eyes looked sunken. His skin, which had once been radiant, looked pale. Weight loss had weakened his body. He complained of loss of appetite and did not consume even a third of the amount he ate when he had prepared to fight Imama. He complained that the food had no taste and stopped after eating a little. On occasion when he ate more at Kabira’s insistence, he threw up soon afterwards. Frightened by what he saw, Kabira stopped insisting that he should increase his diet.
Kabira suggested Tamami see a hakim but Tamami refused to do so. When Kabira threatened to withdraw himself from his affairs if Tamami did not go, Tamami said with bitterness,
“Everyone is forsaking me. You and Ustad Ramzi and everyone else are all the same.”
Tamami’s hands convulsed as he spoke, and the pitiable manner in which he complained made Kabira relent. When Kabira again pleaded that he visit a hakim, Tamami sullenly consented.
When the hakim pressed Tamami to disclose the quantity of drug he was using, he broke down and began yelling. Kabira had to take him away for fear he would become violent.
Tamami lay at home in a somber mood. His respiration had become feeble. Kabira was worried that he w
ould be sick again, but Tamami’s condition gradually improved. He asked for water and drank an entire jug. That did not quench his thirst, and before half an hour had passed he complained again that his mouth was feeling parched. He drank another jug of water and fell asleep.
Kabira left the house on an errand and upon his return found Tamami sitting dressed on the charpai. He looked revived. Displaying complete presence of mind, he spoke about the second bout with Sher Ali.
Kabira decided to see Gulab Deen to ask for a change in scheduling.
The promoter was quite firm that the date of the fight could not be changed.
“Tamami would not want it,” Gulab Deen said, looking defiantly at Kabira.
“He cannot fight while he is in that condition,” Kabira protested.
“If he does not fight, it would mean that Sher Ali has won.”
“I will go and speak to Sher Ali.”
“Go! He will only tell you what you have already heard from me.”
As Gulab Deen had predicted, Kabira did not have any luck with Sher Ali. He was unwilling to change the date.
“Why are you asking for a postponement?” he asked. “Is Tamami not well?”
“Tamami has just recovered,” Kabira swallowed his pride. “I think he needs some more time to prepare.”
Sher Ali told him that he would be paid only if all the terms and conditions set by the promoter were met. If the fight were delayed by the pahalwans’ consent, but without Gulab Deen’s approval, their share of the proceeds from the ticket sales would be forfeited. Sher Ali said he could not afford that.
Tamami’s fee was too little to compensate Kabira for the money he had already spent on Tamami’s training. Kabira had heard that Sher Ali had been paid a greater share of the proceeds of the tickets.
A week passed and Tamami got no worse, though at the akhara his breaks between exercises grew longer with every passing day. The exercises had been curtailed, and he no longer ran laps. He could not grapple with more than two trainees at a time.
When they were alone one day, Kabira asked him if he wished to postpone the fight. Tamami suddenly turned upon him.
“Never! Never ever! I will fight! Nobody…not you nor anyone else will stop the fight!” He had trouble breathing and his hands shook. Kabira saw distrust in Tamami’s eyes.
❖
Tamami began to think that his punishment by Ustad Ramzi was justified. His anger at Ustad Ramzi’s injustice surfaced briefly from time to time, but after a while it was buried under a sense of guilt that grew stronger when he saw that nobody but Kabira took his side.
He longed to exchange this situation with the one he had before found unbearable, and waited for the slightest hint of forgiveness from his brother, which would have redeemed him in his own eyes. As his addiction grew worse, and impairment set into his nerves, all other thoughts were driven out of his mind with the exception of this one. Gradually it became a fixation.
❖
One day when Kabira returned home, he found Tamami looking preoccupied. He asked Tamami if he wished to discuss anything with him.
“Ustad Ramzi will come to my fight, Kabira,” Tamami said in a soft and eager whisper.
Tamami had not mentioned Ustad Ramzi’s name for several weeks.
“Let us hope he comes,” Kabira said.
“He will come,” Tamami said with an odd gleam in his eyes. “I know that he will come.”
“Yes, hopefully he will come,” Kabira replied, unable to get Tamami’s drift.
“You don’t understand! He will come!” Tamami burst out. “You don’t want him to come! That’s why you wanted to delay the fight! But the fight will not be delayed! He will come then!”
Feeling that Tamami needed reassurance, Kabira replied, “Yes Tamami, Ustad Ramzi will come. He will be there. I am sure of that.”
“Gulab Deen also said that,” Tamami said, as his expression changed to one of relief. “so don’t change anything. Don’t ask Sher Ali to postpone the fight.”
Kabira wondered if Gulab Deen knew that Ustad Ramzi would come. He was not sure if there might not be some truth in that. Ustad Ramzi might relent; after all, he was Tamami’s brother.
When Kabira ran into Gulab Deen, he asked him, “Do you know if Ustad Ramzi is coming to the bout?”
“I don’t know,” Gulab Deen quickly looked at him. “Who told you he would come?”
“You told Tamami yourself!”
Gulab Deen smiled.
“Tamami asked me if he would come. I said he may come. I said I think he will come. That was all I told him. You know how he is these days. But I hope very much that Ustad Ramzi does come. A challenge fight lacks something without the blessing and presence of elders. Ustad Ramzi knows the venue where the bout is to be held. I will keep a chair for him in the front row. I will do all I can.”
“So, is he going to come or not?”
Gulab Deen did not answer his question but continued: “I have heard rumors that he said he will come. But, again, he may boycott the fight. These old ustads and their ways. Ustad Ramzi shouldn’t think he is doing me a favor by coming. He should remember that it was I who arranged an exhibition match for Tamami when nobody was willing to fight him. There is no gratitude in my business. Everyone thinks I am after money. But what’s wrong with that, you tell me? If I don’t make money I go hungry. Do you know how hard I have worked to arrange this fight? Don’t say you don’t. But I get no thanks. Only complaints.”
Kabira could not tell how much of what the promoter said was true and how much was an act. Sometimes Kabira felt overwhelmed by Gulab Deen. He knew that if Tamami had an experienced manager, he would have been treated with greater respect. But senior pahalwans kept their distance from Tamami for fear of crossing Ustad Ramzi.
Fixation and Hope
On the morning of the fight, Tamami’s eyes shone brightly despite the dark rings around them. He was unable to hide his joy at the approach of the moment when he would see Ustad Ramzi in attendance at his fight. A smile played on his lips as he sat, head bowed, while the barber cropped his hair. His anxiety grew as the hour of the bout neared, and when he left for the akhara he was on edge.
When they arrived at the akhara, Kabira saw Gulab Deen getting his photographs taken with Sher Ali. Gulab Deen did not ask to have one taken with Tamami.
Tamami looked around and did not see Ustad Ramzi among those seated in the front row. Only three reserved chairs were left to be filled. One was occupied as he watched. Tamami recognized some members of his clan in the crowd, but they avoided eye contact, and he was filled with apprehension. He called Kabira over.
“Do you see Ustad Ramzi?” Tamami asked.
“No. But there is still time.”
“Others are here.”
“I saw them.”
“The fight won’t begin until Ustad comes.”
“He will come. Just wait.”
Another seat was filled. A little before the fight, Tamami withdrew from the akhara and rushed toward the pavilion where the promoter was reviewing last-minute arrangements with a few other men. Kabira followed Tamami.
The trainees exchanged looks. It was against etiquette to withdraw from the akhara once the opponent had arrived.
“I am not going to fight without Ustad here.” Tamami shouted at Gulab Deen as he burst into the pavilion.
Gulab Deen signaled the other men to leave, and looked fixedly at Tamami.
“I won’t fight without Ustad Ramzi,” Tamami repeated. His hands trembled.
“The fight starts in ten minutes,” Gulab Deen said coolly. “It will be held on time.”
“But he is not here.”
“Who is not here?”
“Ustad Ramzi.”
Gulab Deen snapped up some dried fruits from the top of his desk. “Whether he is here or not, the fight wil
l be held. I cannot pamper you like a baby. If you are not in the akhara when the dhol is beaten to open the fight, Sher Ali will be declared the winner.”
“We can wait a little longer for Ustad Ramzi.” Kabira spoke up. “Maybe he will come.”
“A few minutes, not indefinitely,” Gulab Deen replied. “There are people outside who have bought tickets. They are here to watch a fight, and a fight they will see, whether…”
“I could send someone to see if he is coming…” Kabira quickly said.
“Don’t say if and maybe! You told me Ustad Ramzi would come,” Tamami turned on Kabira. Then he faced Gulab Deen again, saying, “You said he was coming. Where is he?”
“Listen to me Tamami!” Gulab Deen said sharply. “Listen to me carefully, now!”
Tamami fell silent. He looked angry, but confused.
“You want Ustad Ramzi to be here so that he sees you fight. But Ustad Ramzi is a proud man. And you know he loves you. Don’t deny it. I know well that you know it. Good! Now I am not saying that this will happen, but it is a possibility. He may say to himself: ‘Tamami did things I did not like. Therefore
I excommunicated him. I want to see what he can do when he is left on his own.’ This is what he tells himself. Now let me tell you what happened next. Tamami went away, and before anybody knew it, he got himself a manager, and also a promoter. Now Kabira is your good friend and I am here to serve you: it’s my job, and no credit to me. But now Ustad Ramzi is surprised and also happy and not a little proud. Tamami is no longer a small boy. A challenge match comes next. Ustad Ramzi is carefully watching to see what Tamami will do. And what does Tamami do? He throws the bout. Why? Because Tamami can easily afford to do it. Why? Because Tamami is far stronger than Sher Ali. But the results create suspense. Ustad Ramzi does not say a word, but I know how he feels in his heart. He says to himself: ‘Maybe Tamami has fallen before Sher Ali’s might.’ I will tell you why he thinks that. Sher Ali is not a nobody. That was why he was matched with Tamami. Ustad Ramzi may say what he likes, but in his heart he knows Sher Ali is no ordinary pahalwan. So he says to himself: ‘What would happen if I went there and Tamami again drew the bout, or, God forbid, lost it? Would I be able to show my face to the world? While the Ustad-e-Zaman looked on, his brother was defeated by a relatively unknown pahalwan. No! No! No! A hundred times no!’ But as you see, Ustad Ramzi does not know that Tamami also has a plan.”
Between Clay and Dust Page 9