by Natalie Ann
So hours later when his doorbell rang and Rosie took off on a run, he followed after her just as fast and flung the door open to see Holly there with Reese, both of them shaking the snow off their heads.
“What a mess out,” she said.
He pulled the box from her hands that she was carrying with some gifts in it. “Did you bring clothes to stay the night?” he asked.
“No. It should stop soon. If not, I can still stay and go home and change before work. It’s not a big deal if I’m late.”
“I don’t think anyone would care one way or the other,” he said. “But you could start to leave some things here to make it easier.”
She smiled at him, dipped her head down a bit, then said, “If you don’t mind, that might be smart.”
“I don’t mind in the least. I wouldn’t have offered if I did. I should have said it before. Or you could have just started to leave things here.”
“No. No one does that without it coming up in a conversation. Talk about awkward.”
She was right. He knew that. Any time anyone else he was dating starting to leave things at his house, he’d remind them to bring them home. Many didn’t like that, but he’d never been at the stage of having people move in with him before. Never felt a connection or trust enough.
Not until Holly.
Someone that was more upfront and truthful than most he’d met in his life other than his family.
Someone that never lied to him. That never wanted anything from him but himself.
What he’d been looking for his whole life and finally found.
“Did you have a nice holiday with your family?”
“I did,” she said. “How about you?”
“I always have a good time for the holidays. Quiet time. I mean I see them every day at work, so you’d think I’d be sick of them, but surprisingly we never are sick of each other.”
They were in the back of the house now, the dogs running around like normal when they first saw each other. Brendan took her gifts out of the box and put them under the tree next to his.
“That’s funny. I feel the same way. Not many people can say that. Or feel that way. That they don’t get sick of seeing their family day in and day out.”
“It probably makes a difference the relationship you have with them. Kat is like her namesake that I called her as a kid. Calm and chill. If she’s annoyed or ticked she just walks away and comes back when she is damn good and ready. She never makes a fuss. My parents are just so thrilled with their second careers and they can come and go when they want, but they are there pretty much every day.”
“What is Kat’s name? I guess I thought it was Katherine.”
“Katrina,” he said. “But when she was younger I called her Kat. She didn’t even cry much as a kid. Always so laid back.”
“Ryan is the same way. Except when he is playing video games. Then he’s cursing and swearing and yelling at the TV. I just don’t get it.”
“If you don’t like games, you wouldn’t. I picture Ryan as a laid back kind of guy. At one with nature.”
“That’s him. Just like my father.”
“Who do you take after?” He didn’t think she was much like either of her parents in personality.
“Probably my grandfather. He was the serious one of the family. I tend to take on everyone’s stresses and worries so they don’t. He was the same way. My grandmother, she was a softie. Is a softie. But she was a bit of a sucker too and got taken advantage of for years.”
She’d once mentioned her grandmother’s tendency to be too generous, but this sounded more serious. “What happened?”
“I think I told you she gave away a lot, but I never went into the details. She’d donate money and goods to anyone who asked. She’d never question things. My grandfather would take the checkbook away from her and make her come to him before she gave money away so he knew it was a legit cause. We never knew that. When he died, she just went through all her savings for years. No one knew until she got sick and there was no money to pay bills.”
“Oh,” he said. “I guess that explains your opinion on people who fundraise and charitable organizations.” It also explained her sour reaction when he asked if anyone in the community came forward to help when her grandmother got sick.
“Yeah. I shouldn’t have let her bad experience corrupt my thoughts on everyone and I’m sorry I did that to you in the beginning.”
“No reason to be sorry,” he said, pulling her next to his side. “You put me in my place in a number of ways. Someone needed to do that. You made me see and realize that at times I had to put myself first. Or at least try and put someone else first that would put me first. If that makes sense.”
“It does,” she said. “You started to think more of yourself and put the effort into something for you as a person. Is that what you are trying to say?”
“Yes, it is. And what I’m trying to say is that I love you. That you’ve been stubborn and in my face. You haven’t been afraid to tell me that you won’t fall for my charm, that you don’t care about my money and that you believe I should think more of myself.”
“Wow, I just had to insult you a bit to get you to love me?” she asked, smiling at him. It was in her eyes, he saw it there, the love she felt back.
“No. You just had to be you. I guess the question is, do you love me back?”
“You can’t tell?” she asked, reaching up and pulling his head down for a kiss. “I fell in love with you weeks ago in this very room.”
“You did? Why haven’t you said anything?”
“I’ve been afraid to. I saw myself falling in love with you and then when we decorated the tree, that was it. That was what pushed me over.”
“The tree?” he said.
“Yep. The tree topper. That’s a special thing to hand over to someone. In my family we fight over it. Everyone wants the honor. You gave it to me. You shared something special with me and in that moment I knew how selfless you were.”
24
End Well
Over a month later she and Brendan were out to eat. They very rarely went out and she was fine with that.
He worked a lot. She worked a lot. When they were together, she’d rather not have the interruptions of strangers, but be in the comfort of his home with the dogs running around.
She’d even gotten in the habit of staying Friday and Saturday night. Now that the holidays were over she didn’t work on the weekends unless they were short staffed.
Sometimes she went in because she knew that Brendan had work to do and he didn’t want to do it with her there, so she left to give him space.
It seemed to be working for them as a couple and she knew it was working for her individually.
There was a commotion at a table a few over when some more people walked in. Laughter and loud voices. She turned her head and saw Jack shaking hands with men in suits, slapping them on the back, offering congrats. He looked like he’d been drinking on top of it.
She turned her head quickly but not before he made eye contact with her.
Brendan was pulling out his credit card and putting it in the billfold when Jack appeared at their table and sat down.
“Can I help you?” Brendan asked.
He was often noticed out in the public, people coming over and saying hi or asking questions when a new game was coming out. Tricks to beat certain levels. He always had a friendly reply that he was off the clock and didn’t talk shop.
“Jack Simmons,” he said, reaching his hand out. “I’m a friend of Holly’s.”
“Not a friend,” she said back. “An ex. Is there a reason you’re sitting at my table when you’ve got a table full of people who might actually want to talk to you?”
Yep, he’d been drinking. She could see it in his eyes. They were all glossed over, his cheeks were red, and she knew this wasn’t going to end well.
That was one of their problems before. He’d drink and then say things he later admitted he didn’t m
ean.
Until the end. When he said he meant all of it.
She believed him and she’d been heartbroken.
“So you came here to start trouble then?” Brendan asked.
“Nope. Just to warn you off of Holly’s games. I know who you are,” Jack said.
“And you think I’m going to believe anything you have to say?”
“Don’t care if you do, but it’s my civic duty to tell you. I saw you on the news with Holly and her family. Using their farm for your toy drive and all. That’s great. I’m sure the business was thankful for the boost. Then I thought you and her seemed a bit cozy. Seeing you here now, well, I figured she was up to her old tricks.”
She felt the dread in her stomach. “No tricks and you know it, Jack.”
He let out a laugh, more like a bark. “Whatever you say. See, my family owns a big law firm in town. Maybe you’ve heard of us. Simmons and Sons?”
“Nope, can’t say that I have,” Brendan said calmly and handed the billfold to the waitress as she came over. “We’re in a bit of a rush if you don’t mind.”
“Doesn’t matter,” Jack said. “But Holly thought she could use our family name to help boost her family business. It’s all about the business for her. Anything for them. I saw you two together and figured she was up to it again.”
The waitress came back over quickly, and Brendan signed his name while Holly stood up. “You’ve got a bad memory. Maybe it has something to do with all the liquor you put in your system,” she said.
“Thanks for the warning,” Brendan said. “But it’s not needed.”
When they were back in his SUV, Holly turned to him and said, “I hope you don’t believe him.”
“Why would he come over and say that? Why make trouble? I have to imagine it wasn’t a good split.”
He didn’t answer her. “No, it wasn’t. We’d dated for months. I really liked him. I thought I loved him. I thought he felt the same way. Again, another guy out of my league, but we got along so well.”
“So what happened?” he asked.
He was still calm, but she could tell he was having doubts and it was killing her. “His family does have a big law firm. He wasn’t lying when I asked if we could partner with them to do events. His family always did stuff in the community and it was around the holidays. We are in a business that caters to the holidays and I just thought it’d be nice to donate stuff from them and us. Together, like a team.”
“You asked him, not the other way around?”
The tears were forming in her eyes and clogging her throat with his questions. It appeared like this was all happening in her life again.
“I did. It wasn’t a big deal. We just wanted to do something nice in the community. His family did, my grandmother did. I told you that. It made sense to do it together since we were dating. He said he loved the idea.”
“What changed?”
“His father. His father never liked me. Neither did his mother. They didn’t think I was good enough for him. They thought he could do better. It wasn’t just the money or the background, it was me. I am who I am. I dress this way all the time. Fancy dinner parties and such aren’t my thing. They were for his family.”
“So he was swayed by them?” he asked.
“I think so. I never saw it coming. I didn’t. He did drink a lot; he said it was family pressure. I believed it. We’d fight when he was drinking, then he’d apologize after and say he didn’t mean anything. Our last fight was him throwing it in my face that I was just after him to boost the family business. That I’d been playing him all along. I was stunned and left in tears. I waited for him to call the next day and say he didn’t mean it, but he never did.”
“So you never talked to him again? Not until tonight?”
“We talked one last time. It’d been a few days after our last fight and I reached out to him. He asked why I was calling, that he’d made it clear we’d broken up. I hadn’t realized that at all. We got into it again. He was sober this time. He had no excuse for the words unless he really meant them. He obviously did.”
They pulled into Brendan’s house now and parked in the garage. He wasn’t saying much, just got out of his car and walked into the house. She followed.
“This is why you’ve felt the way you have about me and our relationship. Why you didn’t trust me?”
“Yes. Part of it. He broke my heart. He made me feel like shit. That I used him, but I never did.”
“He didn’t see it that way,” he said.
“And you don’t either, do you?” she asked, feeling like her stomach just dropped to her feet. “I thought you were better than that. I thought you knew the real me. You said you did, but you really don’t.” The tears were running down her cheeks now. “Reese, come on, let’s go.”
“Where are you going?” he asked reaching for her.
“Home. You’re no better than him. You believed what he said. I’m just a poor girl in your eyes that you are trying to help. This has probably been nothing but a game to you the whole time.”
“So now you want to insult me to make yourself feel better?” he asked, showing some anger and just proving that she was right. She wished she wasn’t, but it was there right in front of her face.
That was it. She couldn’t stay here another second. She couldn’t stand there and look at the man she loved and see the accusations in his eyes.
How had she let herself fall for this again?
“I’m leaving.” She grabbed Reese and rushed out the door, never looking back, her broken heart making it hard for her to breathe as she drove home.
Brendan watched as Holly slammed out of his door. He hadn’t believed what Jack was saying until Holly started to get upset and defensive. Then he started to wonder how much truth was in those words.
She’d always made a huge point about her not using him, but he’d known the business came first to her. She’d been honest about that.
Having her insult him on the way out didn’t make it any better either.
Those little bits of doubt he’d always had started to come forward like a freight train missing its next stop because it was out of control. She was just so quick to think he was guilty that it made him wonder if she was.
He’d told Holly time and again why he didn’t put himself out there. That women only wanted him for his money.
He’d thought she was different. She’d said she was. He believed her.
Now that belief was shattered for some reason.
Was he stupid to feel this way? To feel some doubt when they hadn’t dated long.
She obviously felt he thought that way, not giving him a chance to talk about it more.
And that was another thing. Their first fight and she was out the door. Like other women he dated when they fought. They wanted to be chased down. Wanted him to beg or grovel. It wasn’t him and it wouldn’t be.
What happened to the woman that was upfront and honest? The one that wasn’t afraid to speak her mind and tell him all her thoughts.
She just hightailed it out the door like she’d seen Pinocchio staring back at her in the mirror.
It was those actions that made him doubt things and ask questions. And what was so wrong about asking questions unless she was hiding something based on her reaction to those questions?
It was that that had tears forming in his eyes, had him wondering if maybe he’d been played all along and he’d never find the happiness he was craving.
25
Convince Me
Five days had gone by with no word from Brendan. It was normal to go a day, maybe two, since he often got caught up with work, but he’d been so good about not going any longer.
He’d been trying, he’d told her again and again. That he was putting his personal life first, not work.
But five days meant something more. It meant that he believed she was using him all along.
How could she call and tell him no, that she wasn’t? She’d explained it all that night
. Her pride wasn’t going to let her do it again.
Why should she have to?
And why did it have to hurt so much more than ever before? She’d thought she’d found her forever man in Brendan and never should have let herself believe that.
Hadn’t she’d told him—and herself—that they came from different worlds? That she was insecure about how little she had compared to him?
He’d made her believe it didn’t matter.
She’d never make that mistake again.
“Come on, Reese,” she told the only male that had been there for her when she needed it.
That was wrong, her brother and father had always been there, which was why they had no clue what was going on with Brendan right now.
Not that she even knew herself what was going on.
If they knew how miserable she was, if they knew what Jack did and that Brendan believed it, they’d be over there and up in Brendan’s face.
They wouldn’t care he had all those zeroes behind his name. They’d just care he’d broken Holly’s heart.
She sniffled the rest of her tears away, got in her car, and drove Reese to doggie daycare for the day.
She’d been at her desk working away and pushing thoughts of Brendan from her mind for three hours when her cell phone rang.
She reached for it hoping it was Brendan since very few people had the need to call her. It was Kat. That was odd. She hadn’t talked to Brendan’s sister since a few days after the celebration.
“Hi, Kat,” she said.
“Holly,” Kat said out of breath. That was even odder as Kat always seemed so in control. Hadn’t Brendan said she was the most chill person he’d known? She’d witnessed it herself during those weeks of the event. “Why aren’t you at the hospital?”
“What?” she asked, chills running down her arms. “What’s going on?”
“You don’t know? No one called you? Not even Brendan?”
“No. Who’s there? Is it Brendan?”