by S. E. Smith
Her blood froze. “I never told you his name was Rod.”
Sitting up straight, he said, “I saw it in your logs.”
But she never mentioned his name in the official logs. “Were you viewing my personal logs?”
L’Den’s eyes darted around the room. “Our peoples are at war. From a security standpoint—”
“But did you have to look at my personal logs?” Tessa interrupted.
L’Den blinked. “Well, yes.”
Did he not get how creepy that was?
Though it was just a gesture since she wasn’t eating anything other than the nutrient cute, Tessa wiped her mouth with a napkin before standing. “I have to go. I’ll find my way back to my room.”
Squeak sat on her shoulder as she handed him food she grabbed from L’Den’s plate when he wasn’t looking.
There was a knock at her door and Squeak leaped from her shoulder, scurrying beneath the desk, the food he had been eating plopping down her shirt. Great.
Not only did she hope that L’Den somehow fell into a pit of lava overnight, now he’d see the state she was in. Though, he did see her at her absolute worse—
And she was probably overreacting. Like he said, their peoples were at war. She wasn’t a soldier, but she supposed the HAF would view all the files of a Korthan ship if their situations were reversed.
Opening the door, she was surprised by her own disappointment to see T’ym standing there.
T’ym eyed the stain on her shirt. “I do not believe the doctor has approved regular food for you yet.”
On second thought, maybe it would have been better if L’Den were standing there. Looking up and down the hallway, the ever present mogha also seemed to be absent.
“The HCA has been contacted,” T’ym said. “There is someone on the subspace link now.”
Tessa’s mouth dropped open. What? Now? L’Den was true to his word.
“You may come with me now or, uh, put on something more presentable. I advise something more presentable, but I don’t presume to know much about human appearance protocols.”
Squeezing her lips in a thin line, Tessa gave him a long-suffering look. Aside from the implication that she wasn’t presentable, he was assuming whoever was on the other side of the call would wait. Good thing she could be ready in ten minutes.
Tessa’s heart ached. The person on the other side was none other than her fiancé, Rod Karson. Someone had asked for him specifically—
“You look good,” she said, tears threatening to overflow. In fact, he looked better than good. He didn’t look like he aged a day. She, on the other hand—
“We are glad to hear of your survival,” he said. “And grateful to the Korthans for your rescue.”
We? Tessa felt cold. Something was off. Rod was distant, speaking like a diplomat rather than the love of her life, his eyes never meeting hers once.
“How many Korthans are on the ship?” he asked.
She blinked back the tears. That seemed like a strange question to ask right now. “I don’t know.”
“Are there any cyborgs?”
Cyborgs? Cyborg technology was something humans had been trying to crack for years, but she couldn’t care less about that. And, as far as she could tell, there weren’t any cyborgs on the ship.
“You don’t have to answer that. I know this isn’t a secure channel.”
Secure channel? Who cares? Shouldn’t this be a more tearful expression of relief that she was found and alive? Was he not happy to see her?
He’d moved on, hadn’t he? Two years was a long time to wait. That had to be why he was so distant now—
“We are sending coordinates to rendezvous. Word is already spreading of your survival. There will be a great celebration upon your return. See you in a few days.”
The transmission ended and Tessa just stood there, arms and legs too numb to move.
L’Den stood outside Tessa’s door, fist hanging in the air to knock, but hesitant to do so. The door suddenly opened and he took a step back as Tessa nearly ran into him on her way out.
Stopping in her tracks, the human let out a startled squeak that made him smile. Turning abruptly, she rushed back into her apartment, slamming the door. His smile vanished.
“Go away,” he heard her voice on the other side.
Was she really that upset with him for viewing her personal files? If they weren’t at war, it certainly would have been an invasion of privacy, but—
His mind stalled as it occurred to him that she wasn’t thinking in terms of war. She was a civilian, someone who had been stranded, lost for years. Even a soldier’s perspective on life would be changed after enduring what she went through.
Wrapping his knuckles softly against the door, he said, “I’m sorry I viewed your personal logs.”
“But you still viewed them,” her voice said.
Leaning against the door, he took a deep breath. “I did not enjoy what I saw.”
It was true. What he saw broke his heart.
When she didn’t say anything, he added, “Want to know something about me? Ask me anything.”
More silence and then, “Were you really educated by humans?”
If she had asked him to guess what she was going to ask, that wouldn’t have even been on the list. How did she even know? This human was full of surprises.
“Yes, for a time,” he said after another moment of silence. “When I was a child, there was an exchange program—"
“It’s embarrassing,” Tessa said.
L’Den’s eyebrows knitted. “Getting an elementary education from humans wasn’t that embarrassing. My parents sent me so I’d learn your language.”
A thud sounded on the other side of the door.
“No, you moron,” she said. “You viewing my personal files.” There was a pause. “I’m embarrassed.”
Was that what this was all about? Embarrassment?
“I’ll tell you an embarrassing story about myself that no one else knows,” L’Den said. “Well, T’ren knows, but that’s because he started it.”
The door opened and he nearly fell into her room.
L’Den was speaking, but Tessa wasn’t hearing the words. She absently watched the birds in the garden, poking at her nutrition cube with her fork. Not a single Korthan on this ship made her feel as insignificant as she felt talking to Rod. Even the mogha had some feeling towards her. It might have been hate, but it wasn’t insignificant.
Hate is probably too strong. Definite dislike, but not hate. Cue the inner voice. Great.
I don’t need my inner voice right now, she thought to herself.
Then there was L’Den, a Korthan, no less, that made her feel like the most important being in the galaxy. No one ever made her feel the way she felt around him. It was as if she were in a dream, a wonderful, beautiful dream from which she never wanted to wake. The man invaded her privacy and she couldn’t even stay mad at him.
L’Den took a bite of whatever it was he was eating. It looked and smelled a whole lot more appetizing than her nutrition cube.
“I thought you wanted to hear my embarrassing story,” he said between bites.
Welcoming the distraction from her turbulent thoughts, Tessa rested her chin in her hand with a smile. “You didn’t lure me out of my apartment for nothing. Let’s hear it, then.”
The smile he returned made her heart skip. She stamped the feeling down as hard as she could. She had to wake from this dream. These feelings weren’t real—
“T’ren and I were selected for the exchange program,” L’Den said, setting down his eating utensil. “But he arrived several days before I did. So, when I got there, he already had some new friends.”
Tessa was intrigued by this exchange program. Why had she never heard of it?
“Were his new friends human?” she asked.
“They were human and Korthan. The classes were mixed so we all could learn from and with each other.”
“I’ve never heard of this program,” she said.<
br />
A startling anger flashed through L’Den’s eyes. “That’s not surprising. With the war, the Human Colony Alliance government put a lot of effort into vilifying us.”
Tessa’s heart sank. What else did the HCA hide from its people?
“Anyway,” L’Den’s tone became light-hearted again. “T’ren and I were always playing pranks on each other. So, he was ready with his new friends by the time I showed up.” An equally light-hearted laugh made her giddy, all her worries melting away as she got caught up in the story.
“They told me humans address older people or their superiors with a term,” he continued. “And that I needed to know this term so I could address our teacher properly.”
“Korthans don’t use terms like ‘ma’am’ and ‘sir?’” she asked.
“We do,” he said. “But I didn’t know the human language equivalent.”
The mischievousness of his smile clued her in. “Oh, no, what did they tell you the term was?”
“Dick,” he said.
She laughed. “Dick?”
“Yes,” he chuckled. “So, when the teacher came in, I said ‘Yes, dick’ and ‘No, dick’ to whatever she said.”
“I bet that didn’t go over well.”
“It didn’t. The more I said it, the madder she got.” He shifted in his seat. “They sent me to what they called the ‘Principal’s Office.’”
“What did your friends do?”
“Nothing, they laughed! I didn’t even know I was in trouble. The teacher came with me and when we got in the office, she practically slammed the door. She said—” His voice mimicked the high tenure of what had to be his teacher. “What am I to you?” Then his voice went back to normal. “’You are a dick,’ I said.”
Tessa giggled, feeling like a schoolgirl hearing the latest gossip.
L’Den’s voice went back to the high tone while mimicking his teacher before returning to his normal voice again, “’And what is he?’ The teacher pointed at a man seated behind a desk. I’d never seen him before, but T’ren said the term was the same for a man and a woman, so I said, ‘He’s a dick.’”
Tessa’s laugh was loud enough to turn a few heads in the restaurant and she clamped her hands over her mouth. Smile in place, L’Den stared at her with soft silver eyes, something there she couldn’t quite place.
“What did they say?” she said between her fingers, full of mirth.
“They corrected me,” he shrugged. “The teacher said, ‘No. I am a ma’am and he is a sir. You say ‘Yes, sir’ or ‘No, sir’ to him and ‘Yes, ma’am’ or ‘No, ma’am’ to me. Do you understand?’”
“What did you say?”
“I said, ‘Yes, ma’am, but what is a dick?’” His grin stretched all the way across his face. “My friends had to tell me. It was the first word our upper classmen taught them.”
Tessa leaned back in her seat. “Getting started early on good diplomatic relations, I see.”
L’Den belted out a laugh that set her skin on fire. Oh, how she wanted him to fan the flames.
Distracting herself with the black uniform he wore, her eyes followed the red tracing around the shoulders and sleeves. Did his uniform always have that red trim? T’ym’s didn’t have that. None of the Korthans in the room did. Was it some kind of status, rank?
“The red means I’m in the KCC,” L’Den said as he resumed his meal, chewing another morsel.
“You just read my mind,” she said absently. For the second time, she realized. What a coincidence.
The Korthan paused, eating utensil hanging in the air between his plate and his mouth as he stared at her.
“You just asked what it means, didn’t you?” he said.
“No, but I was thinking it. What does ‘KCC’ stand for?”
L’Den’s hand dropped down, fork clinking against his plate as he shifted in his seat. He abruptly stood. “I have matters to attend to.”
Tessa watched as he set a brisk pace out the door. What did she say? Could this day get any more confusing?
“I am returning the human by Civilian Order Treaty 217.” L’Den looked over the table at the command staff.
“Why? She seems to be acclimating. No one is threatened by her,” J’ake said, leaning back in his seat. “You were right about her; she poses no danger to the ship or the crew. She should remain here until the war is over.”
“We need our protectors to remain,” Captain K’ursick added. “Answering a distress call in Korthan space is one thing, but this requires you to enter Invader space.”
L’Den was well aware of the risks. While the Captain did have his crew and the inhabitants of the ship to worry about, he was overstepping.
“There are four KCC Protectors on this ship,” he said. “You only need two.”
“With the gemkeys going missing, we need all cyborgs onboard to help maintain access and keep the ship’s systems in working order.”
“How many more gemkeys have gone missing?” L’Den transmitted to his second-in-command.
“Eight,” T’ren answered.
“Any leads?”
“Not a single clue. I don’t have an answer for you.”
“You may have my gemkeys,” L’Den said.
T’ren’s eyebrows went up.
“They have been made aware of her survival and are demanding her return,” L’Den said next.
Silence fell over the room.
“You contacted the humans? Do you know what you’ve done?” The Captain’s voice was full of shock. “You will be stripped of rank and title.”
“I am aware of the consequences of my actions, but she must be returned. All I ask before I am confined to the ship is that I be allowed to return Tessa to her people.” L’Den had been a KCC warrior, a KCC protector, and then a KCC protector commander. What good would he do if he was so distracted, he couldn’t perform his main function?
T’ren was waiting for him in the hallway as the meeting came to an end and everyone filed out.
“Have you completely lost your mind?” T’ren said in a harsh whisper. “I can’t believe you did this without telling me first.”
“They can’t take away what I am. Besides, you will be the next KCC Protector Commander. You’re ready.”
“I’m not talking about that. Captain K’ursick will have to take us to the edge of Invader space. You are asking too much of the crew.”
“It’s not too much to show that we are not monsters,” L’Den said.
“She is the monster.”
“Humans are monsters, but she is not.”
T’ren stood back, leveling a steady gaze and L’Den leaned forward.
“You asked if I was drawn to her back on the forsaken planet’s surface.” L’Den shifted from foot to foot. “Tessa is my bond-mate.”
T’ren physically rocked back. “You see her mind?”
“Yes,” L’Den admitted.
T’ren leaned closer to him, no doubt hoping no one could hear them. “Does she see yours?”
“I don’t know,” L’Den answered honestly. “I’ve been trying to block it out.”
“How is that even possible? There is no evidence our species are compatible.”
“Exactly. There is no evidence.”
“If she is your mate, why return her to the Invaders?” T’ren shook his head. “They probably thought she was dead before you sent them the transmission. It would have been easy.”
“I am compromised,” L’Den said. “You know how hard it is for cyborgs to perform their duties with the mate bond distracting them. Returning her before the bond solidifies means I can get back to my life.”
“Without your rank and title,” T’ren pointed out.
“Worth the price,” L’Den said. “Will you come with me?”
“I’m not letting you go into Invader space alone.”
L’Den canted his head in respect and admiration. Turning to go, T’ren grabbed his arm. “Does your mogha know about this?”
“I’ve been s
uccessful in blocking it from him so far, but he can sense that something is going on.” L’Den deflated a little.
“You should tell him.”
Tessa’s mind wandered, a cacophony of emotion swirling within her.
The conversation with Rod— Something was off, way off. She had never felt so uncomfortable. He wouldn’t even look at her.
But the way L’Den looked at her, even when she was at her dirtiest, smelliest, most unhealthy worst back on the desert world. He looked on her with, what was it exactly? Admiration? Adoration? It was like he was seeing inside her, inside her very soul. And he accepted what he saw, human and all. The way she felt around him—
Could she even have a relationship with a Korthan?
Tessa shook herself. She was already in a relationship; she was betrothed. But what if Rod had moved on? Even so, she was human. She should be with humans, especially since the humans and Korthans were so diametrically opposed they were at war.
But if there was anything she learned from her time on this starship, it was that the Korthans weren’t a bad people. She would be comfortable living among them.
Overcome with guilt, Tessa knew she had to return. She needed to see Rod in person, face to face. Maybe he didn’t feel he could express his emotions on a transmission being monitored by the Korthans. That had to be it. That made sense—
A squeak sounded on the floor and Tessa looked over the edge of the bed just in time to see her little friend disappear under the bed with something shiny.
Head snapping up to the shelf above the bed, she saw that her gold gemkey was missing. Did that crazy molk just grab her gemkey? Is that why she found the silver one on the floor before? Of course, the silver one disappeared again—
Jumping from the bed, Tessa knelt to the floor and peeked under. It was dark, but she could see Squeak’s form and—
What in the stars? A pile of something winked and shined at her as it caught what little light there was under there.
Reaching under, Squeak protested as she grabbed at the pile, pulling away with several hard, small objects in her hand. Tessa blinked, looking at three colorful stones resting in her palm. They looked very much like the gemkeys the Korthans wore on their clothing.