by A. G. Wilde
That movement caused the light from the watch she was wearing to fall on her directly, leaving Ajos’ face in shadow.
She felt him freeze, the movement of his hips halting as his body went rigid, and as quickly as how he’d flipped her underneath him, he let her go.
His weight disappeared from above her and she felt a sudden chill as he disappeared.
Somewhere close by, the bushes rustled as Ajos moved into the undergrowth.
Shocked and puzzled couldn’t begin to describe the way she felt.
What the hell?
It took her just a few seconds to respond, and Kerena eased up on her elbow to shine the light in the direction he’d gone.
She didn’t expect to see him there, about a foot or two away. She’d thought he’d gone farther, or worse, ran off completely, but there he was.
He was crouching, staring in her direction, and the image of him made her breath catch in her throat once again.
He didn’t look like a man.
He looked like an animal.
His teeth were bared, his face twisted into a snarl, and he was crouched as if he was some predator about to pounce on its prey.
“Ajos?” Kerena fought to control the pleasure still coursing through her veins.
Never before had she been this turned on to the point of her having trouble controlling it.
Her clit pulsed and begged for his touch. It wanted his mouth, or his hand…fuck, it wanted him grinding against it again. It had no shame.
Ajos’ throat moved.
“You need to get away from me.” His voice sounded strange coming from his lips.
“Why?”
Because he’s feral. Are you blind? her mind answered for her.
“I am not myself. I could have hurt you. I will hurt you. I will take from you what you do not want to give. I almost—” He stopped speaking.
It sure felt as if she wanted to give him exactly what he was saying he wanted to take.
Her body was still begging for him—and even though the craving confused her somewhat, she couldn’t deny that it was there.
“You’re reacting to my saliva. I should be able to control this better.” That sounded more like a murmur to himself. “I have to control this better.”
As he spoke, something on the ground caught her eye.
It was the vial she’d been searching for. The one with the medicine that he needed.
She reached for it and grabbed it with her free hand as she kept the light trained on Ajos.
He was looking at her so intently that she wasn’t even sure he saw that she’d found the thing.
His eyes, such a brilliant gold, shone with the light reflecting off his irises.
His gaze slipped over her, moving down her face, to fall on her shoulder. She was surprised he could see her at all with the light in his eyes, but it was clear that he could.
His gaze lingered and a glance told her that her dress had slipped down her shoulder, exposing her skin and the brown lace bra she wore underneath.
Her gaze fell to her half-exposed breast and she stared at it for a moment.
She was shameless, for she felt no urge to cover herself.
Her breath was still coming in short gasps but that feeling of absolute ecstasy that had hardened her nipples and caused the bud between her legs to swell was slowly ebbing.
She could think clearer now, but when she looked back at Ajos, it didn’t seem like it was the same for him.
His chest heaved as he fought to control his breathing, and his throat kept moving as another rumble began deep inside him.
His growl had scared her at first…now, not so much.
Now, that same sound was making her excited again.
“Ajos?”
His gaze seemed to focus at the sound of his name, and he shook his head as if to clear it.
Kerena felt the vial in her hand. Her fingertips moved over the thing, and now that she was thinking more with her head and not her body, it was all becoming clear.
It was his sickness…
He’d come on to her because of his sickness.
Kerena blinked as she sat up slowly and kept the light on him.
Shame filled her.
How could she have, for even a second, considered otherwise?
As she eased into a sitting position, Ajos watched her move; he watched her fingers grab the dress and pull it back over her skin and she was sure he moved toward her before he stopped himself.
His muscles strained against his will to do what some part of his mind was stopping him from completing.
Moving on all fours, she crawled toward him slowly.
The vial was still hidden in her hand, but that didn’t matter.
He was solely focused on her.
His eyes held hers and he growled low once more, before his gaze moved over her head.
A thrill went through her and she had the distinct sense that he was staring at her ass as she came forward.
He made an appreciative sound in his throat once more and in another situation, she’d have probably blushed.
It’s the fever, Kerena, she berated herself. It was always the fever.
“Stay away,” he growled, but his words held no threat as he moved to meet her. It sounded more like a plea.
She didn’t wait.
The vial had a flat end like a normal syringe did and she’d seen him stab himself with it before.
As soon as she was close enough, she stabbed the vial into his leg and Ajos frowned.
His muscles tensed as his gaze fell to his leg.
Fuck.
She didn’t expect it to feel like that. Burying the vial into his leg had felt like she had stabbed him with a dagger.
It left a horrible feeling in her chest, feeling the sharp end go through his flesh, and she found that in the few moments that ticked by, she was holding her breath, waiting for his response.
A harsh growl left his lips as his teeth bared.
She should have been scared, but it seemed that once fear had left the room, it never returned.
Instead of jumping back and away from him like evolution intended her to do, she pressed herself against him and wrapped her arms around his neck.
“It’s okay,” she cooed, and she noticed immediately that her voice seemed to help. His snarl lessened and he hesitated.
“It’s okay,” she whispered again, pushing back the anxiety that was rising within her. “It’s just the fever. You’ll be okay.”
Guilt gripped her.
He was probably sick because he’d hurt himself the other day trying to protect her.
That injury in his back…it could be infected.
“What have you done?” Each word came out with much difficulty, she could hear. He sounded angry and pained at the same time and, for a moment, she wondered if she’d made the right decision.
Ajos’ shoulders sagged a little and it must be her, but she was sure his temperature was already going down.
“Keh-reh-nah,” Ajos groaned. “I am ashamed. I could have… I almost… I would never hurt you that way.”
He eased up so he could look her in the eyes.
It was clear the medicine was working but there was still some strain there, as if he was still fighting a mental battle.
“No matter what, I would never have forced you to…” He gulped and searched her gaze. “I would have stopped.”
“You did stop.”
“Not soon enough.”
Not soon enough.
Despite the situation, his words hurt a little.
Maybe she wasn’t his type.
“To take you by force would have been the ultimate dishonor to my lineage, my bloodline, and I have already done enough to destroy that.” His arms encircled her, and he pulled her into him. “Forgive me.”
“I’m not upset.” Lies. All that just happened confused her more than anything. Her body still ached a little from his touch, yearned for him in a way that she had never yearned
for anyone before.
Back on Earth, she’d never been one to connect with men quickly—sexually or otherwise.
That’s probably why she’d never had any man turn her on as easily as Ajos just did. At least, not when they tried.
Yet, Ajos had just managed to…
“I fell asleep and you almost…” she whispered. “I could have helped you sooner if I didn’t fall asleep.”
He shuddered and pulled her closer.
“It is not your fault. I was saving the vial,” he said. “It’s the last one I have.” Ajos paused. “I do not know how I will fare tomorrow. I thought…”
Kerena waited for him to continue.
“I thought I could control myself.”
Ajos released her, eased up, and took a step away.
The light from her watch cast shadows that made him look even taller than he was.
He didn’t say anything more, and she didn’t have the guts to ask what he meant.
She felt confused, more than anything else.
Settling back on her haunches, she released a slow breath.
It didn’t matter, did it?
She knew nothing about Ajos. It was probably best whatever had just transpired between them had ended before it got too far.
If she’d been like most of the other human women who’d been taken, she’d have been safe now on the base—at least, relatively safe.
She wouldn’t be in the middle of a jungle with an alien she hardly knew, dry humping in the bushes.
The shame burned against her cheeks.
Ugh. What was her purpose for being here? Back when the shuttle had been coming in, she’d thought there was something, that the universe had led her to this planet for a reason…but what?
She hadn’t discovered anything of note, and they’d been walking most of the day.
All she’d discovered was that her magic wand hadn’t been all she’d needed. Her body yearned for more.
Taking another breath, she tried to ground herself and think of something else.
It the next few moments of silence, she made a pact with herself.
She could never allow herself to be so weak again.
Never.
She repeated this in her mind, forcing the thought to her prefrontal cortex…yet there was a nagging feeling that she was surely going to disappoint herself.
The comm on Ajos’ arm crackled in the night, stirring them both.
“Commander,” V’Alen spoke, his voice breaking the silence between them. “Do you read?”
Ajos activated the device and she moved so she was sitting on the nest of roots again.
“Report, V’Alen.”
“I am almost halfway done with the repairs to the ship. I should finish by daylight.”
Ajos paused before he replied. “Good. I will update you if anything changes here.”
He was standing somewhere behind her and she wasn’t brave enough to look at him.
It was best they ignored what had transpired between them.
The comms crackled off and she could almost feel him studying her.
Kerena cleared her throat.
There was tension between them now, tension that hadn’t been there before, and she didn’t like it. She had at least another day out here in the wilderness with him.
She wished it would go back to how it was before.
16
The star was rising, spreading brightness through the vegetation and bringing light to his eyes.
Ajos turned his head to look toward where Keh-reh-nah slept.
He’d taken off as soon as she’d drifted off to sleep, expelling his energy as he sprinted in a wide circle around where she slept.
It helped a little, slowed down his body’s use of the metcer cells, and he had lasted through the night without attacking her again.
He hung his head in shame as he came to a stop, leaning against one of the huge trees.
He was revolting.
To think he’d lost control…
Memory of her beneath him filled his mind and, as if on cue, his genital pouch swelled in anticipation, his cock pulsing.
Qef.
He shook his head.
He had to think of other things.
He had to think of death and destruction, of all the beings who were depending on him back on the base, of his people, the Shum’ai who would shout in horror at the way he had behaved.
Anger filled his veins—anger and hatred for himself—and he landed his fist into the trunk of the tree.
Wood split but so did the skin on his hand.
He watched his blood drip, the droplets marring the leaves beneath him, and snarled.
Back on Tonvuhiri, during the heat, he’d have been fighting other males for the chance to mate with a female.
It would have been an honor.
He would have been challenged for the right to release his seed in a fertile female. And then, when he’d won, a female could choose him if she so desired.
Shum’ai females were smaller, weaker, and rarer than Shum’ai males. In his bloodline, only one in ten births resulted in a female—in some others, the incidence was none. Males of his species often lived twice as long as the females, too, and these reasons made Shum’ai females his culture’s greatest treasure.
All females were a treasure and he’d almost…he’d almost forced Keh-reh-nah…
Qef.
How far would he have gone before he caught himself?
Ajos slammed his fist into the tree again, enjoying the burn the action produced in his fist.
His anger was building and the pain from his fist hitting the wood seemed to quell the emotion somewhat.
He’d never thought this would have happened to him, being away from Tonvuhuri.
He’d particularly checked Murn GZ’s climate before joining the Restitution, and he’d never gone on missions to extremely hot planets.
Not to mention, the heat had been one reason he’d left Tonvuhiri. Without the warm cycle, his heat would not have been activated.
And then there was the other reason why he’d left…
The memory of Nama’s pleas lit up in his mind’s eye and he punched the tree once more.
The deep pain of old simmered within him, mixing with his growing rage.
He did not deserve to mate.
Not after what he’d done.
His life organ wrung and he planted his other fist into the tree. More wood split and broke away.
He had watched his sister die, and he hadn’t been able to save her.
It was something he could never be forgiven for.
Not only had he lost his family’s treasure, but he’d inadvertently lessened the bloodline of his people.
That’s why he’d joined the Restitution to fight. But no matter how many beings he saved, how many females he helped rescue from the Tasqal’s clutches, it didn’t lessen the guilt he lived with every day.
And now this…
The gods must be punishing him even more.
Memory of Keh-reh-nah would haunt him now forever.
He’d tasted her…
His cock pulsed again and there was pain in his seed sack, but it was a pain he’d have to endure.
He’d gone too far…now there was no going back. There was no way he could control himself around her now that he knew what her skin tasted like…what she felt like whimpering beneath him…
Qef.
He’d have to stay away from her.
As Ajos hit the tree one last time, the trunk snapped.
The sound of wood splitting apart filled the forest followed by that of the huge tree crashing down.
Ajos watched it fall, feeling nothing.
His rage was still simmering, an effect of the heat, of not finding release, and his bloodied hands itched for something else to punch.
He could use his fists…pleasure himself…but that would only make things worse.
As soon as he touched himself, he would cross a barrier th
at he wouldn’t be able to uncross. It would open the gates of his need and he still needed to try to hold it together, at least till he got Keh-reh-nah back on the base.
How he was going to do that?
Only the gods knew.
As he turned to begin running again, a high-pitched sound echoed in the direction in which Keh-ren-nah rested.
He’d heard a similar sound before, when he’d helped his brothers open the stasis hold.
The sound was human. A sound of fear.
A chill down his spine immediately.
Keh-reh-nah.
He was shooting through the bushes so fast, it felt like he was moving faster than light.
His feet were made for running and he knew he was fast, but his body pushed even harder as another scream echoed through the forest.
As Ajos broke through the bushes and came upon her, he stopped dead in his tracks, unable to process what he was seeing.
One of the roots she’d been observing yesterday was wrapped around her leg and she was trying unsuccessfully to use his spear to pry it off.
His heart was finally allowed to beat—he hadn’t even realized it had stopped—and Ajos took a breath.
She was okay.
“Ajos!” she screamed, “Help me!”
He moved, grasping his spear and prying it from her fingers. With one swift downward movement, he slammed the sharp part into the vine by her leg, slicing the plant in two.
It almost seemed as if the thing retreated somewhat and the part that was still wrapped around her leg loosened a little.
Her fingers were frantic as she tried to pry the vegetation off.
“Let me,” he growled before clearing his throat.
He still sounded angry and he needed to hide it.
Taking her leg in his hand, he fought back his feelings and grit his teeth as he pried the vegetation from her leg.
As soon as it was removed, Keh-reh-nah pulled her leg toward her and rubbed the area.
Her movements were still frantic as she rubbed her ankle. It was as if she wanted to remove her actual skin with how hard she rubbed and he had to swallow his feelings as he reached forward and touched her once more, placing his hand over hers.
“Keh-reh-nah?”
She sobbed a little and that’s when she glanced at him.
Her eyes were wet.
She was hurting and he didn’t know exactly why.