by A. M. Myers
Pushing the memories from my mind, I smile and nod. “Really great, actually. I’ve always loved the writing part and now that I’m at Champagne Dreaming, I love my work environment and the people there. I would love to find something special I could do that would really put my stamp on the blog. Kind of like Alison’s advice column.”
“I’m sure you’ll find your thing, Honey. When the time is right.”
I smile. Dottie is all about someone’s energy and the time being right and listening to your instincts. She rarely worries over things the way other people do because she believes the universe will just work itself out. I used to think it was weird, but I’ve learned to listen to her advice over the years.
The ringing of my phone pulls both of our attention to my bag and I grab it, rolling my eyes when I see Ivy’s name on the screen.
“Let me guess, you’re running late,” I answer and I’m greeted with silence.
“Uh, actually,” she says after a moment. “We can’t make it tonight.”
“What do you mean you can’t make it tonight?” I ask, meeting Dottie’s eyes as her eyebrows shoot up. “You haven’t ever missed a Sunday dinner.”
“I know. It’s just…we, uh, we have something we have to go do tonight. Next time, okay?”
“Ivy…” I start but the line goes dead and I pull the phone away from my ear as I stare at Dottie.
“She’s not coming? You girls never miss this night, not once in twelve years.”
I glance down at my phone before setting it on the table, face down. “She said they had something to do tonight and she’d bring him next week.”
“I don’t like this,” Dottie says, shaking her head as she chews her lip. “Something is definitely up with this guy she’s seeing. I knew it as soon as she told me.”
“We don’t know anything yet, Dot,” I point out, to placate her but it’s like she’s not even listening to me. “Maybe they really had something to do or maybe she got nervous. You know this was important to her.”
“We can’t trust this guy. I mean, twelve years without missing a single family dinner and then she meets him and stops showing up. I don’t think so.”
“Dottie,” I whisper, unsure of what to say to her.
“What if he hurts her? How could I live through it again if I let her get hurt, too?”
Tears well up in my eyes as memories threaten to overwhelm me and this time, I can’t stop them. “You couldn’t have stopped them from hurting me.”
“I should have,” she exclaims, her eyes meeting mine in a steely stare and a tear slips down my cheek. “Your mother didn’t want me around you girls, but I should have told her exactly where she could stick it. You needed me and I wasn’t there for you. Look what they did to you.”
I stand abruptly and my chair falls backward as I grab my phone and my bag from the floor. “I have to go. I’ll see you next week.”
“Carly! Wait,” she calls as I walk away from her, but I don’t look back, my chest tight as I run from the house to my car. Firing it up, I fly out of the driveway and away from her house as snapshots from that night flash through my mind. I suppose I should be thankful for them – the snapshots. It’s all I have of that night, little pieces of time that make no sense whatsoever. I don’t know how I would have survived if I remembered every painful detail. Tears blur my vision as I pull onto the interstate and I grit my teeth, trying to fight back the memories but it’s a losing battle.
When I was sixteen, my mother met Harrison, husband number three. Harrison lived in Baton Rouge and my mother wasted no time in moving all three of us away from New Orleans to be with her new beau. It was the only home I had ever known and it felt like I was leaving everything I loved behind - my friends, Aunt Dottie, and my father, even though he had been dead for almost ten years. It was also about the time Ivy and I saw the truth about our mother. We understood this would be a pattern with her and we resented her for it.
Harrison, the nice guy he was, pulled some strings and got us into a very prestigious private school because only the best would do for my mother. It was so different from what I was used to and I felt so alone. My world had been twisted until I didn’t even know which way was up anymore. On my second day of school, Austin Mitchel, one of the cutest, most popular boys at school, approached me at my locker and introduced himself. He had a smile that put me at ease and he invited me to eat lunch with him and his friends. Just like that, I had a place again. For two weeks, he walked me to most of my classes and we talked about anything and everything. I felt like he really got me and when he finally asked me out, I was over the moon.
Of course, so was my mother.
The Mitchels came from old money and their name held a certain level of prestige in this town so she made it her business to make sure he and I really hit it off. For our first date, he took me to dinner and a movie. He was sweet and funny without being too over the top and it was easy to be with him. By the time he walked me to my door, I was head over heels in the way only a teenager can be. He kissed me goodnight and the next day at school, he asked me to be his girlfriend. At sixteen years old, I thought he was perfect. He treated me like a princess, made me laugh and with him by my side, my new life didn’t feel so daunting. I thought I was the luckiest girl in the world.
Things were hot and heavy for us, but Austin was so patient – he never pushed me for sex and always told me he was happy to wait until I was ready. It was a relief after some of the horror stories I’d heard about other guys at our school and after seven months of dating, I gave him my virginity. On the night we first had sex, my mom and Harrison were out at some function and Ivy was at a friend’s house so I invited him over and we went up to my room. He was just as sweet and attentive as he’d always been and it was the most magical night of my life. I decided that this was the man for me, my one true love but everything after that night went downhill.
Austin pulled away from me. It wasn’t instant or obvious but little by little, I was seeing less of him and our interactions were a little more strained. I was terrified I would lose him and I was ready to do whatever it took to keep him. One day after school, I cornered him and forced him to talk to me. He admitted he’d been so stressed with school and stuff going on at home that he’d been shutting everyone out. I’ll never forget the relief that washed through me when he wrapped his arm around me and pulled me into his body, planting his lips on my forehead. He told me he was sorry and invited me to a party at one of his friend’s houses that weekend.
The night of the party, I showed up in the sexiest dress I owned, which admittedly wasn’t all that sexy but I felt beautiful in it and Austin’s face lit up when he saw me so I was on top of the world, ready to dance and have fun with my boyfriend. The last thing I can remember is sipping on my drink while Austin and I danced to Candy Shop by 50 Cent. From there, things get fuzzy and I only have little snippets of memories that don’t really make a whole lot of sense. It’s still, to this day, confusing and impossible to piece together.
When I woke up the next morning, I was back in my bed and my body hurt, everywhere. It was a pain unlike anything I’d ever felt, before or since, and I knew something was wrong, but I had no idea how much my life would change. I hobbled into the bathroom and positioned myself in front of the mirror, not at all prepared for the sight that met me. Dark circular bruises covered my arms and thighs and my chest and neck were covered in hickeys. There was dried blood on the inside of my legs and a dark ring around my neck like someone had strangled me. Gasping, I fell to the tile floor and sobbed, my mind going crazy as I tried to piece together the night before but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t remember what happened.
Ivy found me twenty minutes later, still curled up on the bathroom floor, crying my eyes out. She screamed for our mother and sat down beside me with tears freely flowing down her cheeks as she tried desperately to comfort me. It was also the only time I ever saw tears in my mother’s eyes. They didn’t spill down her cheeks, b
ut they were there for a moment before she gathered me up and rushed me to the emergency room. We sat there for hours in a little room, hidden behind drapes, as they ran test after test on me and asked me questions I had no answers for. And then they walked into the room. If I close my eyes, I can still see their faces just as clearly as I did that day, so somber as they told me what I already knew.
I had been raped.
With tears streaming down my face, I pull into my parking spot and turn off the car, trying desperately not to think of that time in my life but it’s no use. The floodgate has been opened and I’m drowning in horrors I would do anything to forget. My phone buzzes from the cup holder and I glance over at it, sighing when I see it’s a text from Chance instead of Aunt Dottie. I know she didn’t mean to upset me, but I can’t talk to her right now.
Chance:
Something came up.
I’ll see you tomorrow.
Sobbing harder, I toss the phone aside and rest my forehead on the wheel, trying to ignore how upset I am by the fact that he’s not here to wrap his arms around me and tell me it’s all going to be okay.
Chapter Thirteen
Chance
“Dude,” I say as soon as Storm walks into the clubhouse, a dumbass smile on his face. “You’re not even trying to hide how whipped you are anymore.”
“Shut the fuck up, Chance,” he growls, shoving me and I laugh but I’ve got to admit, I’m a little jealous of the asshole. All I want is what he seems to have found but I never know where I stand with Carly. One minute, she’s letting me see behind the façade and then a minute later, she’s closed off again and treating me like we’re nothing more than fuck buddies. Going into this, I knew it would be tough, but I also knew it would never be enough. I want all of her, all the time. Releasing a heavy sigh, I pull my phone out and check for a message from her. I haven’t heard from her since I bailed on our plans to take care of Camilla and Riley and my texts today have gone unanswered.
“Church,” Blaze barks from the doorway, looking pissed as hell, before turning and disappearing back into the room. Everyone looks around in shock for a moment before jumping up and following him. Storm glances in my direction, shooting me a questioning look and I shrug. I’m in the dark like everyone else. Blaze is seated at the head of the table and he looks impatient as we slowly file into the room and take our respective seats around the table. His expression is grim and a sense of foreboding washes over the room. When everyone is seated, he bangs the gavel on the table and clears his throat.
“First up, I got word from Camilla that she and Riley made it to Colorado safe and sound. We’ve got them set up with a friend of mine there who will look out for them while Camilla gets back on her feet and works on divorcing her husband.”
I nod, tapping my knuckles against the table. “That’s good news, Boss.”
He glances in my direction before turning back to everyone else. Is he mad at me for something?
“We’ve got two jobs coming up this week and they are both at the end of the week, so I want extra surveillance leading up to the transfer. We don’t need another Mitch situation. Storm’s eye is just starting to go back to normal.”
“Yeah, fuck you,” Storm shoots back, a smile teasing his lips and soft chuckles fill the air, but Blaze barely cracks a smile. So, it’s not just me. I shift in my seat, feeling the mounting tension in the room. We can all tell something is off and the longer Blaze takes to fill us in, the worse it gets.
“The plan right now is to take both of them over to Nix and Emma’s, so I want two of you to go out there tomorrow and beef up security. The last thing we need right now is trouble at their place.”
“What exactly are you wantin’ out there?” Smith asks.
“Lights, cameras, and motion detectors, at least. Maybe an electric fence along the front and sides, too.”
Smith’s eyebrows shoot up and he glances over at Storm, who shrugs and glances around the table before focusing back on Blaze.
“Thursday is the first job. Her name is Sammy and she’s Biche’s girl.”
“Shit,” I curse under my breath, my eyes growing wide and the men around the table echo my sentiments.
“As I’m sure you all remember, Biche is the piece of shit that got Henn locked up and while I’m sure you would like retribution, it cannot be at the expense of the poor girl who needs our help. Am I clear?”
“Yeah,” I say as several other guys mutter the same. Back in the day, Biche was a small-time dealer – annoying but not really dangerous. He made a major play though when he sold Henn out to the cops and took over his territory. Henn was sent to prison and when the club left all that shit behind, it allowed Biche the room to really make a name for himself. Henn lost everything because of that little snake and this isn’t the first time that the idea of seeking revenge has come up but with Henn getting out soon, we always decided to wait and let him do it himself.
“He’s a major player now and he has the money and power to make this rescue difficult. Our number one priority is getting the girl out of there safe and sound, which is going to be difficult enough without egos getting in the way. Sammy is one hundred percent on board and eager to leave but she doesn’t have access to a phone or computer so her best friend is the one who contacted us. We’ve got to figure out who’s watching her without being seen ourselves so we can develop a safe plan to get her out of there.”
“Understood, Prez,” Moose says, nodding at Blaze. Blaze just nods in response, looking down at the sheet of paper on the table in front of him.
“The other one is on Saturday. Her name is Nadia, and she’s got a three-month-old baby girl with her. Husband is a shrimper, so he’ll be gone all day, and it should be fairly easy.”
“You know better than to say that, Blaze,” Streak says, and Blaze sighs as he nods. His face falls even more as he looks down at the paper in front of him and runs his hand through his hair.
“This morning, I got a call from Kelly, the nurse that helped Dina out when she came into the ER.”
“She got a new girl that needs help?” Red asks from the back, crossing his arms over his chest as he leans back in his chair. Blaze shakes his head.
“Dina was brought back into the ER last night with a serious brain injury, five broken ribs, and a lot of internal bleeding. They were able to stop the bleeding but when they examined her, it became clear that there was no brain function, and her mother made the decision to turn off life support.”
A hush falls over the room and I stare up at Blaze, blinking like I somehow didn’t understand what he just said. There’s no way…
“We had a plan to get her to her parents safely but it’s unclear right now what happened. She may have gone back to him or he may have found her. All we know is that no one can find Mitch, but Rodriguez is looking for him.”
“She wouldn’t have gone back,” I proclaim, looking Blaze dead in the eye. There is no way in hell Dina would have gone back to him. It’s not even a possibility.
“You don’t know that, Chance. We’ve been doing this long enough to know better,” Blaze says.
My fist slams onto the table and everyone turns to look at me with wide eyes. “No. She wouldn’t have gone back. He was right there when we were picking her up. He begged her to come back, and if she didn’t fold then, she wouldn’t have gone back to him.”
“Look, Chance,” Fuzz says, slapping a hand on my shoulder, “we all want to believe that she wouldn’t put herself in that position again, but we just don’t know.”
Shaking my head, I tune them out, unable to believe she would give everything up and go back to that piece of shit. I know all about how many times a woman will turn around and take another beating for a man she thinks she loves but Dina was different. She was so happy in her new life and she was feeling stronger everyday. It just doesn’t make sense. Thinking back to the day we saved her, I wish I had put a bullet in the husband’s skull like I wanted to.
“Smith and Fuzz, I
want you to take care of the security at Nix’s place. They’re waitin’ for you.” Blaze’s voice breaks through my thoughts and I look up.
“On it, Boss,” Fuzz says, shooting Blaze a mock salute while Smith nods in agreement. These two live for this shit. Emma and Nix’s place will be harder to get into than the White House by the time they get done. Blaze nods and bangs the gavel on the table, storming out of the room before anyone else can even stand.
I sink back into my seat and think over the last time I saw Dina, looking for any clue I might have missed but I come up with nothing. The room is mostly cleared out by the time I stand up and walk out into the common area. Kodiak is at the bar and as soon as he spots me, he gets up and walks over to me.
“You all right?” he asks, slapping me on the back and I nod my head.
“I gotta get out of here.”
“You sure? Why don’t you just head up to your room and chill for a bit?”
I glance toward the stairs that lead up to our rooms before shaking my head. There is only one thing in this world I want right now and I only have enough energy to convince her to let me in. “Naw. I’m good. Thanks, though.”
“Yeah, anytime, brother.” He slaps my back again, nodding and I slip outside, Carly dominating my thoughts as I jump on my bike and peel out of the parking lot. I fucking love the work we do here, I really do, but Jesus, sometimes it just takes so much out of me. It’s a little sad how quickly something can thrust me back in time to when I was a kid watching my mom get the shit kicked out of her. The miles between the clubhouse and Carly’s apartment fly by but my mind is filled with images of my mom, beaten and bruised. They urge me to go fast as anger simmers in my blood.
I need her.
By the time I whip my bike into a parking spot outside her building and flip the kickstand down, I’m so agitated I probably look insane but I’m way past the point of caring. The blinders are on and my only focus is getting to her. Anything gets in my way and I’ll knock it the fuck down. I stop in front of the elevator and smash the button with my thumb as I stare up at the dial. My hand taps against my thigh as I watch it slowly wind down and when it stops on the fifth floor, my patience runs out. Growling, I turn toward the stairwell and fling open the door before racing up the ten flights of stairs to her apartment.