by A. M. Myers
“Do you need a ride?” he asks, ignoring my question and I shake my head.
“Nope, I’m good.”
I start to back away from him and he arches a brow. “You gonna walk home at this time of night? In the cold?”
“That was the plan.”
“Let me give you a ride.”
I scoff. “Not going to happen.”
“Please?”
“If you’re looking for money, I don’t have any,” I announce, looking him square in the eye as the envelope full of cash feels especially heavy in my bag.
“Yeah, think I gathered that from your place of employment, Darlin’. And I’ve got plenty of my own money.” His eyes seem sincere but it goes against everything I’ve ever been taught.
“Then what do you want?”
He smiles, a soft smile that strangely puts me at ease. “Just want to make sure you get home okay.”
I release a breath and stare at him as I reach for the phone in my purse. On the one hand, this is exactly what the stupid girl is not supposed to do but I don’t really feel like walking tonight and he doesn’t feel threatening.
“Why would I accept a ride from you after you were such a dick?” I ask. I’m going to get a ride from him but there’s no reason I have to make it easy for him.
He nods. “I am sorry about that. It was that damn voice and callin’ me Darlin’. It really threw me off.”
Oh, I see.
He’s a player and the second a girl doesn’t follow one of his scripted conversations, he hasn’t got a fucking clue what to do with himself. It’s sad, really.
Pursing my lips, I pull my phone out of my bag and unlock it, typing out a message to Mia before meeting his gaze again.
“Okay, you can give me a ride but I’ve just texted one of my best friends and if she doesn’t hear from me in exactly thirty minutes, she will call the police. I should also mention that I have a twin brother in the Navy who will hunt you down and gut you like a fish if you try anything. Oh, and one more thing, you try to touch me at all and I’ll stab your junk with the knife I keep in my purse. Are we clear?”
He bites his lip, holding back laughter as he nods. “Crystal, sweetheart. My car’s this way.”
I follow him as he leads me through the parking lot to a matte black Camaro that makes my heart race for a whole other reason. Since I was a little girl, I’ve always had a thing for muscle cars and any guy that drives one, really. There’s just something about those bad boys and I’m sure my mother prayed I would grow out of it but to this day, this car gets me a little wet.
“Gorgeous car,” I say, running my finger along the hood. He grins as he opens the passenger door.
“Glad you like it. Your chariot awaits.” He extends his hand to the seat and I scrunch up my nose.
“Don’t do that.”
His brow furrows. “What?”
“That chivalry thing. You’re not selling it well and I’m definitely not buying it.”
He chuckles, shaking his head like he can’t quite believe the things that are coming out of my mouth and I wonder if my brutal honesty is too much for him. I walk over to him and brush past him as I slide into the car, enjoying the quick intake of air and the stiffening of his body. This is exactly what I needed after this past week.
As he closes the door, it crashes down on me – the realization that Mom is dead, the pain I was able to escape for a few hours and the guilt that I managed to go even one moment without thinking of her. God, what kind of daughter am I? Who flirts with someone one week after their mother died?
He slips behind the wheel and I suck in a breath, discreetly wiping away the few tears that managed to escape. The engine rumbles to life and I run my hands over the leather interior, appreciating the quality. All my boyfriends in the past were hard on their cars, driving the piss out of them, and living life to the fullest inside them but this one is damn near show quality.
“I’m Lincoln, by the way,” he says as he pulls out of the parking lot and I nod.
“Tate. But you obviously knew that already.”
“It’s nice to meet you.” He glances over at me. “Where am I going?”
I rattle off my mom’s address and he nods. We’re quiet for a while, my mind running with questions from the last few days. Each time we learn something new, it feels like a hundred more questions spill out and at this point, I think I’d like to just grieve in peace.
“Can I ask you a question?” he asks as we near Mom’s house.
I nod. “Sure.”
“Earlier, you said this has been the worst week of your life. What did you mean by that?”
Sucking in a breath, I sit up straighter in the seat and clear my throat. “Uh, my mom died eight days ago.”
“Fuck, I’m so sorry,” he says and I nod, fighting back tears again. It’s nice but it’s just something people say and no one really knows how this feels unless they’ve lost a parent, too.
“My dad died when I was a kid,” he admits and I turn to him, surprised. “I know what it’s like.”
“Oh,” I whisper. “It’s a bitch, huh?”
He chuckles, nodding his head. “Yeah, it is.”
“Does it ever get better?” I ask, not sure that I really want the answer but I’ve never lost a loved one before and I hate not knowing. He sighs.
“I don’t know that better is the right word. Some days are easier and some days are like it just happened or I’ll think of something I want to tell him before realizing that I can’t.”
“That’s kind of what I figured,” I mutter as he pulls up in front of the house.
“Nice place.”
I turn and look up at the southern cottage. “Thanks, for the compliment and the ride.”
“Not a problem.”
Reaching out to grab the door handle, I look back at him. “Well, see you…probably never.”
He laughs. “If you gave me your number, we could rectify that.”
“Who said it was a problem?” I ask, smiling as I open the door and duck out of his car. When I turn to close the door, he’s grinning at me and I can’t help but feel like I just laid down a challenge for him. “Bye.”
“Mm-hmm,” he hums and that’s all it takes to tell me I’m in big trouble.
Chapter Five
Lincoln
“The National Weather Service has issued a severe thunderstorm warning for the following parishes…”
“Yeah, no shit,” I mutter, leaning forward and turning down the radio as the deep automated voice starts listing parishes around the Baton Rouge area. Glancing up at the windshield, I watch the rain fall in sheets all around the Camaro and sigh. It’s been pouring for the last two hours without any sign of letting up and I’m starting to worry that we’re going to have a flooding problem. Sighing again, I grab my phone and fire off a text to Storm to check how many sandbags we have at the clubhouse.
Turning toward the diner window, I wonder if Tate’s house will be okay when I catch sight of her in the window, standing next to a customer’s table as she talks to them with a wide smile. The kind of smile that lights up her whole face and draws people in. Even out here in the car, I can see the way folks gravitate toward her and I can’t say that I blame them. Since finally meeting her face-to-face last night, all I want to do is find an excuse to be near her again. The man sitting at the table in front of her reaches out and grabs her hand and I’m gripping the door handle before I even realize what I’m doing.
Blowing out a breath, I release the handle and cross my arms over my chest. She effortlessly wiggles out of his hold and backs away from the table. My mind flashes back to last night when her hand was in mine and my heart pounds in my ears as my fingers twitch to touch her again. It was only a few seconds but it shook me to my core.
Fuck.
Since the moment I first saw her in that folder Blaze gave me, I could tell there was something about her, something different, something I can’t quite put my finger on but yesterday whe
n she was right in front of me, I saw just how truly enchanting she is. Even pissed as hell and ready to rip me a new one, she’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen and if I thought I was obsessed with her before, it’s nothing compared to how I feel now. I can’t force her out of my head no matter how hard I try but I don’t do this.
I don’t get attached.
I don’t develop feelings.
Except I can feel them already growing inside me and there’s no way to stop them, nowhere to hide, and nowhere to run. I’m not even sure that I want to. I’m standing in the path of a tornado and my feet are glued to the concrete. All I can do is pray that this time, it doesn’t destroy me.
Last night, I sat up half of the night, watching the cameras in her house and thinking of new ways I could see her. And then she gave me the perfect excuse. Glancing over in the passenger seat, I grab the ad for someone to take over her lease that I printed out. It’s so perfect that I just couldn’t ignore it. Glancing down at my phone, I find the ad online and email her.
________________________________________________________
From: [email protected]
Subject: Apartment lease
Date: February 6, 2018 7:52:36 PM CDT
To: [email protected]
Saw your ad and I’m interested in taking over the lease. When would you have time to show me the apartment?
Kodiak
________________________________________________________
I toss my phone back in the passenger seat and glance back up at the diner. She’s behind the counter now and I smile as she pulls her phone out of her pocket and starts typing. As soon as she slips the phone back into her apron, mine dings with a new message.
________________________________________________________
From: [email protected]
Subject: RE: Apartment lease
Date: February 6, 2018 7:55:15 PM CDT
To: [email protected]
I’m free tomorrow morning. 10:30 work for you?
Tate
_______________________________________________________
The sooner the better as far as I’m concerned. I’m thoroughly grossed out by how much I can’t control myself when it comes to watching her on the cameras and lying to her last night when she told me about Sarah dying was hell. Pretending that I don’t know things about her when I’ve studied her file inside and out at least a dozen times feels disgusting and I wish I knew why Blaze has me doing this.
Sighing, I type out my reply.
_______________________________________________________
From: [email protected]
Subject: RE: Apartment lease
Date: February 6, 2018 7:56:48 PM CDT
To: [email protected]
Sounds good. See you then.
Kodiak
________________________________________________________
* * * *
“Do y’all need anything else?” the waitress asks, flashing me a smile. I look around the table at the stack of pancakes I ordered along with the eggs, hash browns, toast, and bacon before shaking my head.
“No, I think we’re good.”
“Well, let me know if you need anything. My name is Gabby.”
I nod and she lingers by the table for a second before turning and heading back to the kitchen.
“What is up with you?” Izzy asks and I glance up at her.
“What?”
She glances toward the door where the waitress disappeared. “She was totally into you and you barely looked at her.”
“Just wasn’t feelin’ her,” I lie and thankfully she buys it. My mind flashes to Tate and I glance down at my watch, eager to see her again.
Izzy tries to maneuver my plates to fit her juice glass on our little table before giving up and standing up. She marches over to the table next to us and pulls it up to ours, giving us twice the room, as I laugh.
“Jesus. I don’t know how you eat that much,” she complains, eyeing my plates.
“What? I’m hungry.”
In true Izzy fashion, she arches a brow and mutters, “Clearly.”
“What have you been up to?” I ask as I cut into my pancakes and shove some into my mouth. She shrugs and cuts into her omelet.
“Same old.”
“Breakin’ hearts all over town, then?”
She giggles. “Yeah, something like that.”
I met Izzy just shy of a year ago and we were hot and heavy for one night before we realized that we would be better as friends. Carly and Ali are her best friends and married to my brothers so it could have easily gotten messy and turns out, we’re pretty similar when it comes to relationships. She’s become a really good friend and someone I can talk to about things I would never even dream about saying to the guys.
Glancing up at her, I frown. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” she sighs. “I just wish I could find someone who was serious about keeping things casual for once. As soon as I start seeing a guy, he wants to change the arrangement.”
“It’s the rule of three,” I tell her and her brows shoot up.
“What’s that?”
“The theory that after you sleep with someone three times, you start getting attached.”
Her fork drops out of her hand and lands with a clank on the table. “So, I’ve got to only sleep with guys twice before finding a new one? That sounds exhausting.”
“Or settle down.”
“Ack,” she snaps. “Take that back. Don’t you put that bad juju on me. That’s never going to happen.”
I laugh, leaning back in my chair as I sip my sweet tea.
Izzy had a bad first marriage like me and that combined with her parents’ divorce has put her off the idea forever but since seeing Tate, I’m beginning to wonder if that’s really the path I want to go down.
“What the heck is on your mind?” Izzy asks, breaking through my thoughts and I snap my gaze to hers.
“Huh?”
“You just got this look in your eye… I don’t know. It was crazy.”
Sighing, I sit forward and set my glass down on the table before running my hand through my hair. “I met someone.”
“And?”
“She’s… special.” Saying the words out loud feels weird but it’s true and I can’t deny it anymore. Tate is different from any of the other girls that I’ve used to fill my bed these last six years. I don’t know what it means or where it’s going to lead or even if it can lead anywhere but it’s out there now.
“Whoa. Are you… are you in love with her?”
I scoff. “No. She’s just different.”
“How is she different?” she asks, tilting her head to the side as she studies me. I stare down at my plate, unable to believe that I’m about to admit this out loud.
“I don’t think once would be enough.”
When I glance up, we lock eyes and she stares at me for a moment, her gaze surprised. Finally, she blows out a breath.
“Okay, then.”
I shake my head. “No, not okay. It’s complicated.”
“How?”
Sucking in a breath, I debate telling her the truth but only for a split second before realizing that out of everyone I know, Izzy is the last person that will judge me.
“I’m kind of stalking her.”
“What?” she screeches, earning the attention of all the tables in our general vicinity and I hold my hands up to try and silence her as the waitress stops at our table.
“Can I get y’all anything else?” she asks, directing her question toward me as she bats her lashes.
“Seriously?” Izzy hisses. “Can you not see that we’re in the middle of a very serious conversation? Got lost, lady.”
The waitress huffs before stomping off and I laugh as Izzy points her finger at me.
“Oh, no, you start talking now. What the fuck do you mean you’re kind of stalking her?”
I straighten the silverwar
e next to my plate and take a deep breath. “Well, Blaze called me to the clubhouse and asked me to watch her…”
“Why?” she interjects.
“I don’t know but I assumed that he had a good reason. Blaze is a good guy.”
She nods. “Continue.”
“So I’ve been following her.”
“And have you actually spoken to her or have you completely lost your mind? Is this another Chris situation?” she asks, referencing Ali’s stalker last year.
“No,” I growl. “It’s not like that and yes, I’ve spoken to her.”
“So, now you’re lying to her on top of stalking her?” When she says it out loud, I realize how hopeless it is.
“I have to come up with a way to fix this.”
She lets out a humorless laugh as she leans back in her seat and crosses her arms over her chest. “I don’t know that you can. When this all comes out, she’s going to run far, far away from you. Unless, of course, she’s also a lunatic in which case, you two are fucking perfect for each other.”
“Thanks, Iz,” I snap and she shrugs.
“Just telling you the truth. You are doomed, my friend.”
“No, I’ll find a way.”
“Kodiak, I say this with as much love as possible but you look like a psycho right now.”
“I know,” I admit but the thought of never seeing Tate again causes me physical pain. Glancing down at my watch, I can’t help but smile, relieved to know that I’ll be with her again soon.
Chapter Six
Tatum
After wiping the sheen of sweat from my forehead, I brace my hands on the open, half-packed box in front of me and sigh as I gaze around the living room of my apartment. I’ve been here for a few hours now and I’ve gotten everything I want to take with me packed up. My clothes and shoes are crammed into two boxes and thankfully, all my bathroom stuff fit into a smaller box. The three bookshelves in the living room are cleared out and all my books are safely packed away as well as all the photos off the walls. The only thing left is to decide what to do with the furniture and dishes.