The Love We Found

by David Horne

  The best thing to do was to get some space, get his head screwed on properly. Otherwise things were going to get more complicated. Jackson preferred not to do complicated, and Andrew seemed to thrive on it.

  Maybe they were more opposite than Jackson realized.

  It seemed like someone at work knew he needed a distraction, because as soon as Jackson stepped out of his shower, he received a call to come in and help out. One of his colleagues on his ward had been slashed at with a butter knife, and they were already understaffed. Jackson was exhausted, and he was sure people would notice he was walking strange, but he wasn’t about to turn down a shift.

  The ward was very active, and it was busy. Jackson loved busy, and he threw himself into it. Even after twelve hours away, the place hadn’t calmed down. It was like Jackson had never been away.

  It was nearly lunchtime when Jackson realized that someone was at the nurse’s station asking for him. He had been so engrossed in checking on a middle-aged patient with suspected blood clots that he hadn’t looked at his pager every time it buzzed. It was only when his name was called over the speakers that Jackson turned away. He gave the woman a smile as he put her observation sheet back.

  “I’m just going to check on what they need me for. I’ll be right back.”

  “No hurry, dear.” The lady held up her magazine. “I’ve got plenty to get to do.”

  Smiling, Jackson left the room. He stopped smiling immediately when he saw Harry by the nurse’s station. His brother was pacing around, dodging patients and erratic staff. For a moment, Jackson thought something had happened to Andrew. Was he okay? Jackson hurried over.

  “What are you doing here? Has something happened to Andrew?”

  “Can we talk in private, Jackson?”

  This was bad. Jackson could feel his heart sinking as he led Harry to the sleep room. There was nobody in there, so Jackson was able to shut the door and lock it. He turned to Harry.

  “What’s going on?”

  “Why did you assume that something had happened to Andrew?”

  “Mom and Dad?”

  “No, they’re fine. This is about Andrew.”

  Harry paused. Jackson then realized what this was about. Andrew had told him what had happened. Jackson groaned.

  “Harry, this is not the time for you to talk to me about my private life. I’m in the middle of a shift and it’s fucking crazy right now. Can’t we do this at home?”

  “At least here I can have you backed into a corner.” Harry folded his arms. “You’re not leaving until you tell me what the fuck is going on?”

  “Why do you care? You an agony aunt now?”

  “I’m currently dealing with Caitlyn’s assault and her mother’s child abuse case. The last thing I need is to have the father’s head out of it. He cannot be distracted right now.”

  Jackson rolled his eyes. This felt like a couple of girls gossiping about what happened in the bedroom. And that was the last thing Jackson expected to do with his brother.

  “Look, Harry, it’s none of your business. It was a one-night stand, and it’s not going any further than that.”

  “Are you sure?”

  Jackson gritted his teeth.

  “I love you, Harry, but don’t play detective on me. I’ve got work and I can’t step out of it for more than a moment to discuss what I did last night.”

  “You need to talk to Andrew again, Jackson.” Harry shook his head. “He thinks you walked out on him.”

  Jackson snorted.

  “First, I didn’t realize we were exclusive. And second, since when has Andrew been insecure?”

  “You haven’t seen him. That man cares more than he’s willing to admit. And you know how hard it is for him to admit anything. Why is this any different? If it was a one-night stand, you’ve always made it clear. You’ve never walked out before the guy’s woken up.”

  “What makes you think I haven’t?”

  “Because you’re not the type to do that.”

  That was one of the most awkward conversations Jackson had ever experienced. Coming out to his parents hadn’t been as embarrassing. And, much like his parents, Harry was relentless. Jackson gritted his teeth. Harry was going to make him say it.

  “That’s because I never completely put my heart into my bed partner. And I’m not about to lose it completely. It was a one-off, Harry, that’s all. End of story.”

  “Then you’d better tell Andrew that.”

  Jackson had nothing to say to that. He just knew he didn’t want to meet Andrew anytime soon; he didn’t think he could look the man in the eye after the booze had worn off. He turned away and unlocked the door.

  “I’ve got to get back to work. I’ve been away from my post long enough.” He opened the door and headed out into the hall. “You can see yourself out.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  It was tough to concentrate on work, but Andrew gritted his teeth and got on with it. He needed something to distract himself from the night before. It had been an amazing night that had been ruined by Jackson walking out. Now Andrew had a nasty taste in his mouth.

  The guy was incredible. He had to know that. So why had he walked away? Did the guy think Andrew had come on to him because he was drunk? Andrew had needed some booze to take the next step, but he wasn’t drunk. Now he had crossed the line, Andrew was not planning on going back.

  It was a shame that Jackson didn’t seem to think the same way. If he did, he wouldn’t have walked away while Andrew was sleeping.

  He was going to give Jackson a piece of his mind once he got a moment. As of right now, Andrew knew he wasn’t comfortable addressing him without yelling. A fight was not what he wanted.

  Unless it was a fight to get Jackson back into the same room as him.

  Andrew’s head was pounding as he sorted out the kids at the end of the day. It hadn’t rained in spite of the overcast skies, but the humidity just made everyone struggle. Charlie ended up lying on the couch refusing to move as he watched cartoons, Billy took Andrew’s fan into his room and stuck it on full blast, and Caitlyn had taken to opening the freezer and sitting with her back pressed against the drawers. Andrew had got a shock going into the kitchen and almost falling over his daughter’s feet.

  It was still thick in the air as the children went to bed. First Charlie went up, complaining that it was too hot, but he was asleep pretty quickly. Billy only came out of his room to have dinner, and Andrew could hear the fan on full blast as he went past his son’s door. Even the music couldn’t drown out the sound.

  He was going to need to get a second fan. Andrew could feel the sweat trickling down his back and sticking his t-shirt to him like a second skin.

  Caitlyn was still in the kitchen, pressed up against the freezer. Andrew shook his head as he opened the fridge above her head and selected a bottle of water.

  “You’re going to thaw out all the food, Caitlyn.”

  “I haven’t done it all evening. Just a few minutes now and then.”

  “I swear you’ve been plastered to that thing all afternoon.” Andrew sipped his water. It seemed to completely freeze his brain, and he took a moment to recover. “How’s your stomach?”

  “Not too bad.” Caitlyn patted her belly. “Tugs a tiny bit, but that’s to be expected. As long as I don’t get into more knife fights, I’m good to go.”

  Andrew grunted. He settled onto one of the stools at the center counter and took another slug of water. It was soothing his headache, but not much.

  “You okay, Dad?”

  Caitlyn was watching him curiously. Andrew rubbed the cold bottle against his forehead and then against the back of his neck.

  “I’m fine. Just boiling. This humidity is getting to me.”

  “Same here.” Caitlyn blew at a strand of hair dangling over her face. “I’ve lived here all my life and it’s fucking awful.”

  “Caitlyn!”

  “What? I’ve heard you say worse.”

  “Fair enough, but d
on’t do that within my earshot.” Andrew sighed as he felt the cold water trickling down his back. It felt like bliss. “And certainly not within your mother’s earshot.”

  “Not a chance.”

  Caitlyn looked down at her cell phone, which she had placed on the floor. It was buzzing away, Caitlyn swiped at the screen and picked up the phone. Her brow furrowed as she went through her messages, her frown turning into a scowl as Andrew watched. Then she let out a frustrated growl, hitting her head on the freezer drawer.

  “Caitlyn!”

  “Sorry, Dad. It’s either that or respond to these stupid bitches.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  Caitlyn waved her phone at him.

  “The girls who were at the park with Tina, her friends who ran away, have been messaging me since we got a date for Tina’s trial. They’ve gone from bullying to outright death threats.”

  “What?” Andrew stared. “How long has this been going on for?”

  “A few weeks now.”

  “And you never told me?”

  Caitlyn winced.

  “I didn’t want to get you angry about it. I thought they would get bored and die down. I’ve never responded, but that doesn’t seem to make a difference.”

  Andrew couldn’t believe he had had no idea. He thought Caitlyn told him everything. Clearly, she was capable of hiding something. But something like death threats? How could she even contemplate hiding it from him?

  “Did…” Andrew took a deep breath. He was going to lose his cool if he wasn’t careful. “Did you tell Detective Prewitt about this?”

  “Yes, Harry knows.” Caitlyn’s face went red. “I mean, Detective Prewitt knows. He’s already spoken to them about it, but that was before they became death threats. I’m documenting them so I can send them across.”

  Harry should have arrested them. As far as Andrew was concerned, the girls harassing his daughter were also guilty of assaulting her. Didn’t matter they weren’t holding the knife; they were just as responsible. Harry needed to hold them accountable as well, but it sounded like these girls had a few silent helpers keeping them out of jail.

  “Dad?”

  Andrew realized he had been staring at Caitlyn, off in his own thoughts. He shook himself and rubbed at his eyes.

  “Sorry, honey. I just…”

  “I know what you were just, and I don’t like it.”

  “You seriously think I’m going to sit back and let you take all this.”

  Caitlyn rose to her feet, nudging the freezer door shut with her foot. She walked over to her father and kissed his cheek.

  “I love you, Dad, but I don’t want you doing anything stupid to make the world right. I don’t want you to go to jail as well. Harry is taking care of it all and he’s keeping me updated. I’m a grown woman. This I can handle.”

  Andrew knew she was right. But that still didn’t make him feel any better. He affectionately tugged at Caitlyn’s braids.

  “I still see you as my little angel, Cait. I wouldn’t be a good father if I didn’t protect you.”

  “And I appreciate it, Dad. Just let someone else do it.”

  “Someone like Harry Prewitt?” Andrew shot back, smirking as Caitlyn’s face went red.

  “He’s the cop in charge.”

  “Who wants to be more than your dad’s best friend.”

  “Dad!”

  Caitlyn’s face went so bright red Andrew was sure he could feel the heat coming off her. She turned away and Andrew burst out laughing.

  “Relax, sweetheart, you’re an adult. I’m not necessarily happy with it, but Harry’s a good guy.”

  “You make it sound like I want to sleep with him.”

  “I know you do.” Andrew grinned. “I’ve been around a long time to know the signs. Just don’t do it in my house.”

  “Dad!”

  Andrew was still laughing as Caitlyn ran out the kitchen, hands over her face, and into the lounge. Moments later, there was the sound of breaking glass and a scream. Andrew froze. Then he launched himself off the stool and ran into the hall.

  “Caitlyn!”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Jackson was angry at Harry. He shouldn’t need to stick his nose into something that wasn’t his business. Bullshit it was to keep Andrew on an even keel. His brother just liked to get the gossip and hide behind ‘it’s to do with the case’ line. Jackson was not going to deal with any of that.

  Whatever did happen between him and Andrew, if at all, Harry was not to be involved. Jackson would do things in his own time. Maybe after a few days, when he had finished with his long multiple shifts, and had a chance to clear his head.

  If anything did happen, great, Jackson would take it. But if Andrew wanted nothing further out of it, Jackson would have to walk away. It was not going to be easy to be around the man he had started falling for a long time ago and not be able to do anything.

  Perhaps he should head back to Spokane. After his dad’s heart attack, Jackson had moved back to be closer. But maybe he should go back to his last job. Distance would help. Even as he thought it, Jackson felt sick at the thought. Distance was not going to help a broken heart.

  As he arrived back at his apartment, Jackson was preparing himself for a shower and a microwaved meal before falling into bed and watching some meaningless programs on the TV. But as Jackson pulled into his spot outside his apartment, he was surprised to see Andrew leaning on his bike across the street. He had his leather jacket on and sunglasses in spite the fact the sun had gone down long ago. He had his arms folded, staring at Jackson’s car.

  Jackson felt a shiver as he got out and locked up his car. He wasn’t prepared for this. But Andrew was not a man to back away. This was going to happen, whether Jackson wanted it to or not.

  He waited as Andrew pushed off his bike and walked across the street. He tried not to openly stare as the biker strolled like he was on the catwalk. That guy could have burned the pages of a modelling magazine.

  He had to get a grip on himself.

  “What are you doing here?”

  “I’m here to talk to you, Jackson.”

  Jackson swallowed. His pulse was racing now.

  “I didn’t think we had anything to say.”

  “We have plenty to talk about.” Andrew took off his sunglasses and stuck them in his breast pocket. “And I think something in particular needs to be addressed.”

  Jackson didn’t even think he could form words about what happened the night before. He turned away.

  “Andrew, not now. I’ve just had a long shift…”

  “And I’ve just had a brick through my front window.” Andrew’s sharp tone had Jackson stopping. “Narrowly missed Caitlyn on the couch. Your move.”

  That had Jackson turning back.

  “Is Caitlyn okay?”

  “She’s shaken, but she’ll be fine. No flying glass got near her, thank God.”

  Then Jackson saw that Andrew was shaking. His expression was barely contained, and Jackson could see the pure rage. And he saw Andrew’s hands were clenched tightly at his sides.

  “What about you?”

  “I’m okay.”

  Jackson snorted.

  “No, you’re not okay.”

  “Fine.” Andrew advanced on him, and Jackson had to stop himself from backing away. Even the man’s anger was a turn-on. “I’m not okay that I thought my daughter was being attacked, that I had to chase someone away only to have them fuck off on me. I’m not okay that she’s being abused online by the most disgusting little girls I’ve ever come across.” Then his expression softened and his hands cupped Jackson’s face. “But standing here with you? Now I’m okay.”

  Jackson couldn’t push him away as Andrew kissed him. It was a sweet, sensual gesture that had barely contained passion behind it. Andrew was wound up tight, gripping onto Jackson like he was a lifeline.

  This had to stop. They needed to talk, not kiss like nothing had happened. Jackson pulled away from the kis
s, but not from Andrew’s hold. He couldn’t bring himself to do that.

  “We shouldn’t, Andrew.”

  “Shouldn’t what?”

  “This.”

  Andrew raised an eyebrow.

  “After last night? You’re seriously backing down now?”

  This was going to be painful.

  “You were drunk. Last night was a one-off thing for you to let off steam. I get that.” That hurt more than he anticipated. Jackson stepped away. “You’re not looking for a relationship, least of all with me.”

  Andrew was now staring at him like Jackson had been beamed down from another planet. He folded his arms and tilted his head to one side.

  “Jackson, how the fuck do you know what I want? Have you ever asked?”

  “I…”

  “I’ve slept with both men and women. You know that, and I’m not ashamed of it all. You didn’t take advantage of me. If I came on to you it’s because I wanted to. Fair enough, I did need some alcohol to push me into doing it, but I wanted to do it.”

  Now that Jackson hadn’t heard from Andrew before. He felt like it was a bizarre dream. He licked his lips, aware that Andrew looked straight at his mouth.

  “So, this wasn’t just a drunken mistake?”

  Andrew shook his head.

  “Never. I should’ve done it a long time ago, but I figured you’d push me away with the baggage I come with.”

  “You do realize that I’ve stuck by you through all that baggage.” Jackson rubbed his hands over his face. “I guess that says something about me.”

  “I learned something about you last night, Jackson.”

  “What?”

  Andrew smiled.

  “That when your long-time crush finally reciprocates your feelings, you freak out and run.”

  Jackson started. He had never said a word about his feelings to anyone, least of all Andrew. Except…

  “Harry.” Jackson growled. “I’m going to kill him.”

  “You can do that later.” Andrew took Jackson’s hand. “I just need you. And I need you to get us inside before I embarrass us out in the street. I don’t know many of the laws of Sacramento, but I’m sure two man having sex in public is illegal.”