This need for her only grew every day.
The sight of her left him breathless.
And the feel of her was more intoxicating than the best champagne.
Ryder knew he’d never have enough of her–never. And the way she was wrapped around him and begging for more, he had a feeling it was mutual.
It was late. The room was dark and they were tangled together under the blankets. Ryder knew he should be asleep–they both should–but his mind wouldn’t shut down.
“I can hear you thinking,” she said sleepily, her head on his shoulder. “What’s going on?”
After letting out a long breath, he kissed the top of her head. “I’m still trying to process everything that happened with my parents. I can’t believe my mother has cancer and I’m horrified by my father’s behavior.”
“So that’s never happened before?”
“Not like that. My father has always been rather aloof, but that was flat out rude tonight and I’m embarrassed that you had to witness it.”
“I’d like to say it’s not a big deal but…it wasn’t fun being on the receiving end of his mood.” She kissed his shoulder. “What was he like when you were growing up?”
“He had less gray hair.”
“Ryder…”
Running his fingers through her hair, he decided to confess a little. “One of the reasons I’m so drawn to Magnolia Sound is because of your family.”
Lifting her head, she stared down at him. His eyes had adjusted enough to the dark to see the shocked expression on her face. “Seriously? My family? Why? Because they remind you of yours?”
That made him laugh softly as he guided her head back to his shoulder. “No. And I’m talking about your extended family. The first time Austin invited me to some family get-together, I went to just sort of appease him and thought I’d stop in for a few minutes and then leave. Then I started talking to people and ended up staying for the entire time. There was no angle, no one was asking anything of me, I was there and people were just genuinely nice. So, naturally, I thought it was just a one-time thing. But the next event I went to, it was the same and…people seemed happy that I was there.”
She nodded.
“As crazy as it sounds, I never knew families could be like that. It didn’t matter what the occasion, everyone laughed and smiled and got along. I can’t even remember the last Ashford family get-together where anyone smiled,” he said with disgust. “Now I find myself thinking of the extended Coleman family as…well…family.”
Beside him, she didn’t move, didn’t make a sound, and he wondered if she’d fallen asleep.
“Peyton?”
“Is that why you’re with me? What attracted you to me? The fact that I’m part of the whole Coleman family package?” she asked quietly and Ryder could hear the insecurity in her voice.
Gently, he maneuvered them so he could look at her face. “It wouldn’t matter who your family was…I’d be drawn to you. Even when you hated me, I was drawn to you. Never doubt how I feel, Duchess.”
He heard and felt her shaky breath. “No one could believe that someone like you would want to date someone like me. So hearing you say all this about my family…”
Caressing her cheek, Ryder leaned in and kissed her softly. “They have nothing to do with us. I swear. It was important for me to share with you this…this part of how I feel. My family was dysfunctional and I didn’t realize it until I came to Magnolia.” He paused before deciding on one more confession. “And I owe you an apology.”
“Ryder, we’ve already discussed this. You don’t need to apologize for your parents…”
“No, not that. I didn’t truly understand just how stressed you were before Mason’s party. But earlier today when I was waiting for my parents to get here and then waiting for you? It occurred to me just how much I didn’t take what you were feeling seriously. So…I’m sorry.”
She snuggled close. “Thank you.”
He kissed her again just because.
“What a pair we are, huh?” she whispered. “All this time I kept thinking how we didn’t have a whole lot in common besides our business interests and then it turns out we both have nightmares for parents.”
That made him laugh. “I guess that’s one way to look at it.”
“I hope I didn’t overstep about your mom coming here to recover. She just seemed so lost and the thought of only having your father around to support her was just…ugh.”
“I’ll admit the thought never occurred to me, but once you said it, I was kind of ashamed that I hadn’t considered it before.”
“Well…it sounds like there’s a good reason for it.” A yawn cut off her words and she hummed softly. “I think I need to get some sleep.”
Hugging her gently, he placed a kiss on her forehead. “Good night,” he whispered.
And then, when her breathing slowed and he knew she was asleep, he added, “I love you.”
11
For the better part of a week, Peyton couldn’t get Ryder’s mother off her mind. Not only because of her cancer diagnosis, but because of all the similarities she saw between Helen and her own mother. What were the odds that she and Ryder would have that in common?
It was something the two of them talked about over the last few days, and she wasn’t sure what broke her heart more–the fact that he wasn’t more concerned about his mother’s health or how Helen seemed so indifferent to her own son.
And that’s how Peyton found herself pulling up to her childhood home on a Wednesday afternoon.
When she knocked as she let herself into the house, the look of shock on her mother’s face almost made her laugh.
“Peyton! This is unexpected. Shouldn’t you be at work?”
“It’s good to see you too, Mom,” she murmured as she kissed her on the cheek. Dropping her purse on the entryway table, she walked over to the living room and sat down.
“Is everything okay? You look like there’s something on your mind,” Georgia said as she sat down.
The thought of confronting her mother really hadn’t come to her until earlier today and there wasn’t anything that ultimately pushed her to do it. It was like suddenly she just knew this was a conversation that they needed to have.
Studying her hands in her lap, she carefully began. “I need to ask you something.”
“Of course. You know you can ask me anything.”
That statement was almost laughable, but she held it in. “Why are you so critical of everyone?” she asked, and immediately braced herself for the response.
Georgia didn’t immediately reply. “May I ask what brought this on?”
Now she looked up. “I met Ryder’s mother and…I noticed a lot of similarities and it made me sad.”
“Similarities…how?”
Ugh…how could she explain it? “The way she spoke, the way she criticized, the way she talked to Ryder more like a stranger than a son.”
“I don’t believe I’ve ever treated you like a stranger, Peyton.”
“No, but you certainly haven’t been remotely supportive of me or my dreams,” she explained. “You’re constantly talking down to me like I’m too stupid to make my own decisions–even though I’ve always been the one to follow all the rules and haven’t failed at anything I’ve tried.” With a sigh, she added, “I just don’t understand why it’s so hard for you to acknowledge my successes or for you to show any motherly affection.”
And there it was–dropped like a lead balloon between them.
The harsh truth.
Every time she ever envisioned confronting her mother in her mind, it always ended with Georgia weeping loudly and begging for forgiveness.
The reality was slightly different.
Georgia primly cleared her throat, folding her own hands in her lap. “You know, the Coleman name always carried weight here in Magnolia Sound,” she began, “but we weren’t always the wealthy family you know us to be.”
That was…new.
“
My grandfather–may he rest in peace–always worked so hard and he expected that of his children and grandchildren as well. So while the name had clout, out bank accounts weren’t overly impressive.” She picked at an imaginary piece of lint on her pants before continuing. “Anyway, my mother–your grandmother–always hated working. She despised it, really. She used to tell me the only way to survive was to marry a wealthy man so I’d never have to work a day in my life. She drilled that into me from the time I was a little girl and told me it was my right–that I was entitled to it.”
Peyton thought of her grandmother Betty and remembered she wasn’t particularly warm either. Why hadn’t she put two and two together before?
“Anyway, I’d like to think if my mother would have spent the time just loving me instead of grooming me for the role as wife to a wealthy man, maybe I would be different.” She looked up with a sad smile. “But it was all she could talk about. She used to criticize my weight, my hair, my wardrobe…it got to the point where I just gave up and let her just control every aspect of my life. When she introduced me to your father…well…”
“Oh my God,” Peyton interrupted, horrified. “You and Dad were set up by Grandma?”
She nodded. “Fortunately, he was someone I had been secretly crushing on. I never let her know those sorts of things because I used to fear she’d hold it against me.”
“But…how?”
Georgia seemed to ponder that for a moment. “I felt like if I said I had a crush on a boy, she’d find fault with them and do something to ruin any hopes I might have had with them. For the longest time she had her eye on Mayor Thompson’s son Lyle.” She shuddered. “He was awful. Beautiful to look at, but he had a reputation for having an awful temper. Naturally, when she set me up with your father, I was relieved. It turned out we had a lot in common and once we had gone out a few times, he confided in me how he was under a lot of the same pressure that I was and…we bonded.”
Bonded. That didn’t sound overly romantic, which is what she said to her mother.
“Oh, Peyton…romance is highly overrated,” she replied wearily. “We genuinely like and respect each other and made a good life together.”
“Yes, but it’s a little cold and emotionless, Mom! Didn’t you think about trying to break the cycle you obviously hated?”
“I did, but…I couldn’t. Things would come out of my mouth of their own accord and after a while…I just accepted that this was who I was. Your father has been much better about it, but…”
“Has he? Because from where I’m sitting it seems like he just opts to say nothing most of the time rather than call you out on your bad behavior.”
Her mother frowned at her. “You know, I don’t think I like this newfound sassiness from you, Peyton Eleanor. I’m still your mother.”
“I know that, Mom, but…I hate the relationship we have! I don’t want to dread seeing you or talking to you. I want…I want the kind of relationship Aunt Susannah has with Mallory! I want us to want to do things together!”
Georgia’s shoulders sagged. “When Susannah moved back here to Magnolia and she was temporarily estranged from Colton, I said those exact words to her.”
Peyton’s eyes went wide. “You did?”
She nodded. “You were in college and always so busy and Parker was off gallivanting I don’t even remember where and…I thought it was too late. I didn’t realize you might want the same thing.”
“Well, I do,” she told her firmly. “I have for a long time, but every time I think we’re making progress, you…you talk down to me and make me feel like a disappointing child rather than the successful woman I am.”
“You’re always going to be my child, Peyton. I can’t help that.”
“I know, but…maybe don’t talk down to me. Maybe just…smile and say you’re proud of me.”
Her mother’s expression softened as her eyes shone with unshed tears. “I’ve always been proud of you, Peyton. Always. You…you’re far braver than I ever was. Both you and your sister. I don’t know how I ended up with two such independent daughters.”
It would be wrong to tell her it was primarily because they were trying to escape her…
“I’d really like for us to work on this, Mom. Not just talk about it right now and then tomorrow have things go back to the way they were.”
She nodded. “I’d like that very much.” Reaching over, she awkwardly hugged Peyton.
Baby steps.
When she pulled back, she studied Peyton’s face. “So, you met Ryder’s mother and felt like we should talk about our relationship.”
“Yup. Ryder and I talked about it for days, and I realized he felt the same way about her as I felt about you. Sitting back and witnessing someone else dealing with all the same disappointment was very hard and it broke my heart for him. For the both of them. His mother just found out she has cancer and it was as if she were talking to a stranger about it and he didn’t have any particular reaction to it. I thought it was sad.”
“It sounds very sad.” She paused. “I’d hate to think if I were sick or dying that my children wouldn’t care.”
“I’d hate that too. Things need to change. I know you’ve been trying ever since Mason and Scarlett got together, but…”
“Yes, your sister-in-law does tend to call me out every chance she gets…”
“There’s a reason for that,” Peyton murmured.
“I know. I know.” Placing her hand over Peyton’s, she asked, “So where do we go from here?”
“Well…for starters, we should have lunch together sometime.”
“Peyton, we often have lunch together. That’s not anything new.”
“Then how about next time we go and you don’t comment on my hair or my clothes?” she suggested. “Nothing drastic.”
Georgia’s mouth was nothing more than a thin line before she sighed. “Fine.”
“Thank you.”
“May I ask you something now?”
“Absolutely,” she replied, bracing herself.
“Are things getting serious with you and Ryder?”
Peyton felt herself blush as she nodded. “Yes. I’m…I’m in love with him and I still can’t believe it’s true–that someone like him would even be interested in someone like me.”
“Why wouldn’t he be interested in someone like you? What’s wrong with you?”
“Really? You want to pull at that thread?” She paused. “Mom, you’ve pretty much destroyed my self-esteem! You put down every guy I ever dated or was interested in and then reminded me how I should be thankful for the men you found for me!”
“Oh…that.”
“Yes, that! Now do you understand why I find it hard to believe that a man who can have anyone he wants, could possibly want me?”
Then Georgia did start to cry.
And not the genteel weeping Peyton figured she’d do, but full-on sobbing and wailing.
Oh Lord…
“Mom…Mom…it’s okay,” she said carefully. “Really. I’m…I’m sorry. I never should have said that.”
“Yes, you should have because it’s true! I should have realized how my words were affecting you! I know how my mother’s words hurt me and now hearing you say these things makes me realize just how awful I am! Why would you even want a relationship with me?” she said before sobbing even louder.
For a solid five minutes, Georgia cried. Peyton got up and grabbed a box of tissues and figured the best she could do was to let her mother cry this out. When she finally calmed down and had a face full of running makeup, she realized this was the most real and honest emotion she’d ever witnessed.
“Better?” she asked as her mother wiped her face.
With a small nod, Georgia agreed. “I want to thank you.”
“For what?”
“For caring enough to want to come here and have this conversation,” she said quietly. “I promise to do better.”
“Thanks, Mom.” This time the hug was less awkward and poss
ibly the best hug she’d ever shared with her mother because there was real emotion there.
Things were changing.
Getting better.
When they pulled apart, Georgia cupped her daughter’s cheek. “I’m very proud of you, Peyton. And, believe it or not, it makes me feel good just knowing you’re in such a healthy relationship.”
“What do you…?” It was an odd statement because her mother didn’t really know much about her relationship with Ryder to be saying something like that.
“The fact that the two of you talk about your struggles and you share interests…those are very important things.” She paused and took Peyton’s hand in hers. “Just…promise me one thing.”
She nodded.
“You may think that I ran the show around here, but…that didn’t happen until much later in our marriage. There were many years where your father made all the decisions and would tell me what was for the best and what wasn’t.” She sighed. “It was the way he was raised, too. He didn’t think it was important to include me in important decisions. Don’t let Ryder do that to you.”
Her soft laughter was out even as she shook her head. “Trust me, that is not an issue. I’ve made it abundantly clear from the very beginning that I not only have an opinion on just about everything but that I won’t tolerate him thinking for me.”
“You’re very fortunate, Peyton. You found one of the good ones.”
And she had to agree.
“What do you mean the plans weren’t approved?” Ryder yelled into the phone. The town had been jerking him around for weeks now on his resort plans and he’d hit his limit. “Dammit, Austin! What the hell else could we possibly have to do?”
“I’m working on it, Ryder. I’ve got a meeting with the town planners tomorrow and hopefully we’ll get things cleared up once and for all. You have your set of plans at home with you, right?”
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