by C. A. Sabol
Etoileon said nothing, only smiling a moment later when he landed a nice punch to Trion’s face.
Trion stepped back, and Etoileon attacked. One roundabout kick and a trip later, Trion was on his knees, struggling to get up. Etoileon was just about to land the finishing blow to Trion when his adversary rolled away and tumbled off to the side, Etoileon's fist only managing to brush slightly by.
Etoileon felt the sweat run down his face as he backed up a step and took another ready stance. Trion followed his lead. Both of them were breathing harder now. Etoileon could feel his heart pounding in his chest.
Trion relaxed again. “I see your fighting skills have worsened since we last met,” he called out. “You’re such a scared, helpless little orphan boy, aren’t you? I bet you cheated to get the role of the Princess’s protector—maybe she even felt sympathetic enough to help you cheat.”
Something in Etoileon snapped. It was one thing to tease him, call him names. But it was another matter entirely to bring the Princess into the mix. He action was swift, his retribution hard and fast. Before Etoileon could think to consider what he was doing, his arms blocked all of Trion’s movements as he charged forward. He nearly tackled Trion, lashing out in hard, quick punches. Trion ducked and tried to block, but there was a rage in Etoileon that even he didn’t seem to understand completely. He didn’t even realize while he was punching Trion’s face that his rage had nothing to do with Trion’s remarks and everything to do with losing Selene.
A moment later, Etoileon felt his body being pulled out. He could tell that someone had taken hold of him and pulled him off his opponent. Etoileon stopped fighting and looked up to see that the Master Fighter, their teacher, Master Norio, had taken a hold of Etoileon by the scruff of his neck. “Etoileon. I think it is clear that you have won.”
“Oh.” Sweat ran into his eyes. He could feel his shirt sticking to his back. There was blood on his fists. On the floor in front of him, Trion was trying to stop his nose from bleeding and his right eye was swelling up.
Etoileon felt the guilt in him start to rise. “Sorry,” he said. “I guess I got carried away.”
Master Norio grimaced. He pulled Etoileon aside, and said with a frown on his wrinkled face, “Don’t try it again, Etoileon. Trion may have said something you do not agree with, but hurting him in retaliation to a remark will not change his mind. There are other battles that matter much more than this one, battles of the heart. This behavior is really unworthy of a true Fighter. Now, you’re dismissed.”
“Master, I’m so sorry,” Etoileon tried again. He was reaching out for an explanation, but he didn’t know what had happened to his loss of control. Something had snapped inside of him. “I ... I don’t know what happened.”
“You are both dismissed,” Master Norio said turning to face both of the boys, this time with much more emphasis on his words. His hard hazel eyes glared down at his students as his hands folded and he walked away.
For an old man, Etoileon thought, he was pretty tough. Etoileon reached down and offered his hand to his opponent. “Sorry,” Etoileon apologized. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
Trion glared at him, making his face look even more twisted because of his black eye and swollen nose. He reached out and knocked Etoileon’s hand out of the way. “I don’t need your pity,” he sneered, getting up and heading for the showers. “I’ll win the next time, mark my words.”
Etoileon hung back a moment as Trion left. He was usually much nicer, he thought. “Wonder what happened to him?” He shook his head, trying to clear his mind. He was finished for the morning it looked like. He had the rest of the time to himself.
Checking the clock on the wall outside of the gymnasium, he saw that it was just about time for the Lunar Storms to begin. The palace that evening, was preparing to hold their traditional Moonbeam Sky Show Festival. If he hurried, he could make it to the High Tower just in time to see it. He pulled on his fighter cloak and headed off.
IT IS COMMON KNOWLEDGE that the moment that a person tries not to think about something, thinking about anything else becomes impossible. Selene was just thinking this as she miserably slumped about in her room. Usually by now she was changing into a different outfit by now to go down to lunch. But for the moment she just stayed in her royal bed; the covers were tossed here and there, almost all on the floor, as she lay there, curled up in a ball.
She’d been like that since she’d come back from breakfast. The only break she’d taken was to scribble a note quickly down to Dorian, asking for him to allow her to take on a couple more handmaidens. Chevée had taken it down to the King for her. Selene had decided that she did not want to see him for a while.
She did not want to see Etoileon either. She did not want to see him, because the moment she did, she knew her heart would break. She would demand him to tell her why he’d just stood back from letting this intruder try and take over her life. Sometimes what we want to know, Selene thought, is not worth giving up what we already think. Sometimes.
Chevée returned, bowing her head. “I have delivered your message, Your Highness,” she said. “His Majesty told me to tell you that some additional handmaidens for you were fine with him. He also would like to see you at dinner tonight and respectfully requested that you be there.”
“Tell him I’m not coming tonight, Chevée,” she answered. “Tell him I would like to go to sleep a bit earlier tonight.” She sat up as an afterthought, adding, “With my highest respects, of course.”
Chevée stood a moment in silence before she nodded. “Yes, Your Highness.”
When she was gone, Selene rolled over and looked at the door, a loud sigh escaping her. Her fists balled up and placed themselves on her forehead, as though they were trying to pound out some of her anxiety. Maybe all this will look better later, she thought, closing her eyes.
“Please,” she whispered, as she did not know who would listen to her. “Please ... Help me.”
A moment later, she sighed once more, and decided to get out of her room. Her eyes looked all around, and landed on the window. From her room, she had a perfect view of the courtyard, covered this time of day with servants and the many gardeners. Looking up into the glare of the fading sunlight, the princess decided she would take a visit to her tower. Selene forced a small smile. She wanted to see the sky show, anyway. It would be in perfect view from the High Tower. Since she’d just sent Chevée to get her out of the festival dinner, she had time to herself. Selene crawled out from her covers. After quickly changing into a simple white dress and making sure that her servants were otherwise occupied, she quietly sneaked out of her room.
ETOILEON DASHED UP the stairs. He was no longer thinking about what he’d done in the practice room. All he was thinking about now was that he was going to see Selene again. He hadn’t been away from her more than a day in a long time, and in his mind he realized how much he’d come to depend on her kindness. There was a smile on his face as he rounded the last circle of steps and came to the door. With Trion and the others like him, it was good to see a friendly face.
He paused a moment, to catch his breath, and then opened the door. His first step inside had him looking around for Selene.
“Selene?” He couldn’t find her. “Huh ... ” She must not be up here yet, Etoileon thought as disappointment began to come over him. He shrugged it off. Surely she would be here soon. She would not want to miss the sunset and the start of the Lunar Storms, no matter what had happened earlier. He walked over to the edge of the balcony and saw, looking into the far reaches of the horizon, there were crowds of people who had settled in the desert outskirts of the city, all in hopes of getting a picturesque view of the phenomenon.
He placed his hands on the balcony’s edge and slumped over, looking at the scenery of the city below. Etoileon saw that there were more than a few ships leaving port and heading back in the direction of their respective homes. He recalled the time when Selene had told him that Dorian would take her on a Goodwill
Trip to the other islands when she was married. He wondered if she would be by the time the next trip would come around in six months, or even if there would be another tour at all. Catching sight of the sunset light on the ocean water, he smiled as the simple beauty stole the rest of his thoughts away for a while. With the war starting, such moments were to be more treasured for their rarity.
That was how Selene found him. His head resting in his folded hands, leaning heavily onto the granite stone. For a moment she looked at him with shaking hands. She had not wanted to see him today. What a foolish wish, she thought. It was hardly a possibility. As long as she’d known Etoileon, he’d been there to watch the city scenes with her. She sighed and tried to swallow the lump that was suddenly in her throat. Putting on a small half-smile, she took a couple of steps closer to him.
“That’s not the proper posture for a Fighter, is it?” she asked jokingly.
Etoileon stood up at once, and turned to see her smile. “Selene. You’re here,” he greeted her. His own smile started to form, but it faded once he saw that her eyes were not twinkling along with her smile. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
“Me? Of course I’m okay.” Selene’s voice had a tiny infliction in it that told Etoileon she was fine, but she was not her usual cheerful self. Her eyes gleamed almost maliciously as she asked, “And what about you? Are you still sick?”
“Sick? I was –“ he stopped and grimaced. Dorian must’ve told her to keep away from him because he was ill. Sometimes, Etoileon thought, Dorian could be a pain. But looking back at Selene, he struggled to maintain a level head. “I am fine, thanks.”
She moved up to settle herself on the balcony’s edge, on the opposite side from where Etoileon was standing. “Good.”
That was when he was sure something wasn’t right. As long as they’d been alone in the tower, she’d never in his recollection faltered in standing up close to him before, in reaching out to comfort him, or tentatively patting his back, or holding onto him while she leaned over the balcony wall.
“I think that something is bothering you,” he started to say.
She cut him off quite nicely. “No, I said I’m very well, thank you. I’m fine, and everything is fine. Quit being so concerned.”
He decided to try once more. Stepping a subtle step closer to her, he tried to look up in her face, which had been conveniently turned away from him at the moment. “Selene, are you sure –“
Her eyes snapped around at him, making him nearly step back. “Of course I’m good. I can survive a day without you hovering all around me.”
So that was it. “Selene,” he started, “Look, um ... I’m sorry about what happened. These past couple of days –“
Again he was cut off as she broke into his sentences. “Don’t worry about it,” she practically snarled. Her anger was boiling at this point. “I said that I can live my life perfectly fine without you around.”
Ouch, that hurt, Etoileon thought. “I don’t care about that,” he said. “I want you to know that I’m sorry I wasn’t able to protect you.”
“Protect me?” Selene’s eyes flickered with tears. “Is that all? You’re sorry you couldn’t protect me?”
“Yes. I’m very sorry that Aemon hit you.” Wrong answer. Etoileon could feel the stillness between them as it turned cold.
“Oh, I suppose your friends already told you all about what happened,” Selene murmured. “Or maybe it was one of the maids, or the guards running around this palace.” Her tears disappeared. As he began to confirm her assumption, she continued. “I don’t care where you heard it from, but I can’t believe you weren’t there in the first place! You’re supposed to be my protector, and then you disappear just as I ... as I ... ” she broke off as her tears came back once again.
Etoileon didn’t know what she was talking about. “Selene, if I’d so much as talked to you, your idiot brother would’ve had me thrown out of the palace, and then I’d never be able to see you or protect you again. I would’ve lost my job!” his hands were thrown up in exasperation.
“Oh, so instead you’ve just lost my respect! I never thought you would’ve let anyone try to marry me against my will.”
“I told you, I couldn’t! And besides, when I first came here, that was how it was laid down. I was supposed to protect you until you got married. And it looked like you and Aemon were going to get married!”
“I don’t want to be married to him! You knew that!” There was no getting past it.
“Well, I hear he’s going to be throwing a war instead, so you don’t have to pitch the blame on me for that!” Etoileon couldn’t believe how easily he’d fallen for it. She was angry with him, and now he was getting angry with her.
“Etoileon, can’t you see? I don’t like this at all. Dorian is my brother ... and you, you’re my ... well, point is, you are both so important to me, and you both just stood back and figured that I’d go along with this marriage since it was Aemon threatening a war if I wouldn’t! How could you?” She fell to her knees, crouched over.
“Oh, really, Selene, stop crying!” Etoileon insisted as he took another step closer to her. “I was scared out of my mind that I’d lose you!”
“And so instead of protecting me, you just stood back and deserted me?” Selene whispered softly as she looked up at him.
“No! I didn’t stand back ... ” he thought about it. “Well, I might’ve, but I wouldn’t have stayed that way, I promise! I was stuck in my room for the past two days, left to wonder what in the world was going to happen.”
“Oh, I’m sure you would’ve thanked me for everything before I left to live on some island in the Sapphiran Seas. Thanked me for keeping you off the streets, having given you a good job and –“
He cut her off this time. “Hey, I earned that job! Do you know how many tests your stupid brother put me through before he consented to allow me to be your protector? It was more than necessary, that’s for sure!”
Selene rose to her feet. With a look of indignation, she huffed. “Dare you interrupt me? Have you forgotten who I am?”
“Frankly, it’s hard to tell just who you are at the moment. The Selene I know is never like this!”
“ The Princess you serve can be however she likes!” Selene snapped angrily. “I’m a human too and I can be angry if I feel like it!”
“Serve? I serve you? Do you think I do all this stuff around here because I’m told to?” Etoileon asked, his voice still loud. “Well, guess what? I don’t! I don’t have to do anything you want or what anyone else wants!”
“Go ahead then,” Selene shouted back. “I can see that since you do anything you want, standing aside while I was trying to be manipulated into a political marriage pretty much means that I’m not high on your list of priorities.” She turned her back to him and scooted closer to her side of the balcony.
It was at this time the sky was starting to get dark. The mild sunshine was beginning to grow faded as the moons, one on each side of the circle of sunlight, started to shine their celestial rainbow colors.
Etoileon just stared at Selene’s back as she glanced at the view. This argument was far from over, he thought. “Selene, I’m not finished. I was going to say that anything I do around here is because I want to, but -”
“I knew that!” Selene whirled around again. “I know that! You don’t have to tell me!”
“ What I meant by it is that there are sometimes when I can’t always do what I want, all right?” Etoileon tried to lower the coldness of his voice. “I can’t always break the rules or deny a request even if I want to, any more than you can roam around the city the way you want to.”
“What’s your point here?” she asked. “I’m getting sick of arguing.” Literally, she thought. Her head was starting to hurt, and her vision was blurring over, more and more as the sky grew darker. She was starting to feel drained of her energy.
“My point is, there are sometimes when I can’t control what I do. I wanted to tell you. I wanted
to protect you. I want to be there for you. I sure didn’t want this stupid argument!”
“So sorry to disappoint you,” she frowned.
“Do you honestly think that I—or your brother for that matter—would’ve so easily let you go? That we wouldn’t have tried to stop them from taking you? Do you have so little faith in both of us that you think we don’t need you around here?”
She said nothing. Etoileon felt that, at last, he was getting somewhere. He reached out for her, but she took a step back from him again.
“Leave me alone,” she whispered, turning away from him and trying to forget that he was there.
“No.”
Her eyes snapped open and she looked back at him, about to demand that he leave at once when he’d caught her in a tight, uncomfortable hug. Her argument died on her lips as she felt his arms tighten around her. It was the first real time that he’d purposely attempted to hold her in his arms.
The moment passed. Remembering her anger, she elbowed him hard in the stomach and started to struggle against him, trying unsuccessfully to push him away from her. “Stop it! Let me go!” she squirmed as she balled up her fists and tried harder to get away.
But Etoileon was a trained Fighter. Nothing she did would be able to break his hold. Finally, after numerous attempts, she stopped hitting him and stopped trying to push him away, only to break down in tears.
She felt so betrayed, so confused. She’d felt so helpless to her anger. Selene knew that she should’ve been honest about it. But she couldn’t help it. This was the first time that he’d ever let her down. This was the first time that she’d felt that maybe he wasn’t as concerned for the future of their friendship as she was. Of course she’d probably just ruined any chance of remaining friends now, but it was only because ... because ... she didn’t even know why she’d succumbed to this level. She thought he was giving up on her and her first instinctive action had been to hurt him for even allowing it to cross his mind. Her tears welled up in her eyes even more as she realized what a horrible person she was.