by C. A. Sabol
Cyerra nodded, too full of emotions to say the words back to him. For a long while he just held her, as the rains slowed and the sky began to lighten.
Selene had not meant to overhear Ronal’s farewell to Cyerra; she had been passing by the open courtyard, and had heard the familiar voices as they were carried on the wind. She’d stopped and listened, the tender words drawing her in. She now turned and slumped against the cold granite walls of the palace, slowly sinking to the floor as she laid her head in her hands.
Was this war so eminent that it threatened to tear love apart? Would such pain be forgotten or rewarded? Would suffering ever really be gone? The questions filled her head, and there she stood, the princess of the torn-apart world, trained in all forms of study and learning, considered to be the sign of peace, and loved by so many, with no available answer.
She looked up from her lap and felt her heart ache for one she loved. “Etoileon,” she murmured thoughtfully. I will go and see him, she thought. “I miss how you used to comfort me,” she whispered softly. She recalled how another used to comfort her, too, and nearly cried again. Standing up, she brushed herself off and hurried to go and visit Etoileon, wishing that she knew of the place where she could see Pegasus once more as well.
THERE ARE SOME ADVANTAGES to being a princess, Selene thought as she breezed right through the medical ward hallways. Normally, she would’ve had to go through several people and nurse stations, trying to answer all their questions as they decided whether or not to allow her in. But being a beloved member of the royalty, she merely had to show up and they all moved to please her.
The Diamond City Medical Ward was located adjacent and connecting to the palace. The building had been built into the slanting landscape, on the large hillside of the Table, but it had taken more than a few moments of walking for Selene to arrive at her destination.
Opening the door to his room, Selene felt her sadness for the war soften as she gazed upon the familiar features of her protector. The rain still hit the window in the hospital wardroom where Etoileon had been brought. He seemed to be much better off than the last time Selene had been with him. His color was good and his vital signs were all well. The resident doctor had informed her that there was no visible reason why he had not awakened yet; Etoileon’s fever was down from before and he was receiving the best possible care for his present condition.
She moved over to sit by him and reached down to take his hand in hers, as she had done last time. “Hi Etoileon,” she greeted him lovingly in a hushed voice. “I hope that you’re doing better today. I know that you at least look peaceful.” She tightened her hands around his and bowed her head low. “I wanted to tell you that Dorian did punish me for going to see you. I am not allowed out of the palace grounds, as usual, but I have a couple extra study sessions on proper etiquette and there are a few of the King’s guards that stand watch over my room during the night.” She paused here and drew back from him, letting go of his hand and moving to look out the window towards the outer keep.
How strange it was to know that there were soldiers and Fighters and the defenders of the Crown in that part of the palace. There were people who were going to die in the next day or two standing in that mob of people in the rain, listening to her brother the king, as he tried to encourage and comfort them.
She leaned against the windows and folded her arms to her chest. “The Great Battle is going to start soon, I hear,” she said. “I am glad, if nothing else, that this coma has taken you out of the battle. Your friends are going to battle soon, including Ronal. I heard him telling his sweetheart Cyerra goodbye. She must be so troubled over his fate. I cannot imagine the feelings that she must be having right now.” She looked back over at him. “I did not have to worry about you prior to the attack,” she whispered. “I never had to say goodbye. I never got that chance.”
She broke away from the window and came back to lean her head down on his still shoulder as she felt her face scrunch up. There were no tears left in her, but the pain was as sharp and as real as ever. “That is why I must apologize,” she whispered against him. “I almost had you taken away from me, by my own decision. I had a chance to make you well, and I committed your memory of me to Obsidian for that chance. I willingly turned to the dark master in an effort to help you. I’m sorry. I believed that I was doing right; I believed that I had to do it almost, because of my feelings for you. I felt that I should do all that I could to help you, and because of that misguidance, I almost lost you. I am so sorry, so grieved, and so tormented over how I almost let you be changed forever. I can’t believe how fortunate I am, that the Guardian did not allow Obsidian into your mind before he and his servant were dispelled.”
She laid her head on his shoulder, feeling the warmth of his breath into her hair as she remained there. She was hoping that she had managed to shake him out of his slumber, but he didn’t alter his conditions in the least. Her eyes lowered, and her heart couldn’t take it anymore. She had apologized, but she still felt the guilt of her decision.
Maybe it’s because I not only failed Etoileon, but Pegasus as well, she thought despairingly. Thinking of her other hurt friend, she shook her head. I’m so sorry, Pegasus. I know I am unworthy of you, and I can never make up for what I have done this time. How I wish that you could help me now, she silently called out to him.
She suddenly felt like screaming. Like crying and sobbing until she grew hoarse and weary of her calls. Selene sat up and sighed. Clutching his hand in hers once more, she tenderly brushed some of Etoileon’s stray bangs away from his face. “I will see you soon,” she promised, getting up and hurriedly leaving.
He had felt so dead to her in there, she thought as she started running. Nurses and aids dodged around her as she fled down the halls and around the corners. Trays upset, carts crashed, and people fell as Selene lost sight of them in her attempt to outrun the void that was haunting her. Etoileon had never felt so far away from her as he did in there. And Pegasus, she couldn’t feel his presence at all. Why would he stay with someone who didn’t obey him, didn’t trust him, and couldn’t find it in herself to have faith that he had kept his word that he would always be with her? She could think of nothing to answer that question. “Only a miracle,” she replied cynically.
Selene finally stopped, bending over as she tried to catch her breath. She put her hands on her knees and leaned over, allowing her heart to slow down as her body took a rest. When she had taken several deep, calming breaths, she looked up and found herself in a familiar place. She’d stopped at the door to the staircase that led up to her High Tower.
“Huh?” Selene was dumbfounded. “How did I end up here?” she wondered. She had no memory of running so far, so quickly. The time that it had taken her to get there had been several more minutes than what it had seemed to her. She looked at the door carefully. “Should I go up there?” she asked aloud, and instantly there was a whisper in her heart that said yes.
There was a part of her that wanted to go up there. Up there were memories of happy times with Etoileon that made her almost feel alive again. Up there it was also closer to the realm of Crystallon, where Pegasus and the Guardian both resided. And it was far from the soil of Sapphira, where all her trouble came from. So with a braveness she had never known before, she started up the stairs to her High Tower room, wishing every step of the way that there would be peace for her at last.
TO HER DISGUST, THERE was nothing peaceful about being in the High Tower just then. The rainstorm poured down on the tower heavily, seeming to be just one stream outpouring from the clouds instead of millions of little drops. The lightning that laced through the skies seemed much too close for comfort, and the thunder boomed so loud that Selene thought that she would burst her eardrums if she remained there too long. Worst of all though, was that there was no light. The stars and moon were all blotched out by dark, black thunderclouds, and the city lights were hard to make clear from this high up. All around her, the darkness swirled and se
emed to seep into her space, even her very skin, as she watched out of the Tower room’s large windows.
Selene placed her hands on her ears to soften the sounds of the raging storm outside and tried to find a spot to sit down; in all of her times in the tower, it had been rare that she would be in the room. She loved to be on the balcony, looking down on the city at her feet.
“Why am I so scared all of a sudden?” Selene said to herself as she looked around. She decided that she had been foolish to come up there, what with the large storm outside so intimidating. She started to head back to the stairwell entrance.
But it was just then that a lightning bolt crashed through the window, and thundered roared, causing Selene to shriek and fall to her knees on the ground. The storm scared her so badly, but she could not move. She curled up into a ball and felt like crying. For long moments with the endless storm echoing all around her, Selene just laid there on the floor, too scared to move, too afraid to do little more than whimper to herself.
The storm began to sound like it was being muffled. Selene felt the slight spray of rain on her face, and her eyelids grew heavy with weariness. In the midst of the storm, she was called to sleep.
SHE ADJUSTED HERSELF onto her knees, and was slightly surprised to feel, instead of a hard, cold, wet floor, a soft padding of sand. She looked up to feel the mist of a sea on her face instead of the rain of a thunderstorm, and to hear a familiar voice calling out to her instead of thunder.
“My precious, precious child,” the voice called. “Are you there?”
Selene looked up to see her dream world start to change as she shook her head, too ashamed of herself to answer his call. The skies in her dream grew cloudy and dark, and the waves began to slosh all around. The wind picked up, almost like a whirlwind, causing her to wrap herself up in her own arms, trying as best as she could to protect herself.
Her face scrunched up as the sand blew in her face, but it wasn’t long before Selene peeked out to watch the storm as it overwhelmed her. The sand whipped her face, and she suddenly let go of herself, too depressed to do anything any longer. She had no strength left in her, even to protect herself.
She stood up, her eyes catching sight of a glimmer on the horizon. Her heart leapt. Could that be Pegasus? she wondered. Her eyes filled with tears. No, it could not be, she thought, because I have gone away from him. She looked down the beach, and this time another sight in the sky caught her attention.
There was a scene from her life, a memory, flashing across the broad sky. Selene watched as it came more and more into focus, and then she was able to identify which event it was.
This one was the day the tenth anniversary of the death of her mother. Selene saw herself placing a bouquet of flowers on an ornate gravestone. She remembered that day; it had been a hard one to get through. She hadn’t known her mother at all, and still she missed her.
Then the scene faded, as another one took its place. This one was her twelfth birthday celebration, and Dorian had arranged for a magnificent performance from one of the globe-touring circus and animal companies.
Soon another came, and another after that. Selene watched as happy times and sad times alike flashed across the gray clouds of her dreamland’s sky. The day that Haiasi, her brother’s dear companion and advisor, had been buried. The time that Selene had helped plant the courtyard flowers. The time that she had argued with her brother at the lunch table about starting her education. Graduating from Master Norio’s training sessions as a full master of self-defense. Splashing around in the fountain near the Great Hall. Meeting with Etoileon. Dancing with Etoileon. Losing Etoileon.
Somewhere in the stream of vivid memories, Selene noticed that there were a set of footprints in the sand that came up with each passing memories. Some of the memories had two sets of footprints. Some of them only had one. Selene frowned at this, wondering what it could mean. She looked again and realized that it was during the sad times of her life, the painful trials, the agonizing hours, that there were only one set of footprints in the sand.
She thought about what Pegasus had said to her about never leaving her, about knowing her for years. If one set of those footprints is mine, she thought, then the other must be his. But why would he leave me when I am troubled? She examined the footprints closer and saw that one this slide, one of the two sets of feet looked like they belonged to a horse or some kind. That confirms it, she thought, he must have not been here with me. But she was still troubled at the thought of him leaving her, especially in the times of her life when she had been troubled. It didn’t make any sense, she thought.
“Pegasus,” she called out. “Pegasus, please! Tell me why you would leave me in the harder times of my life ... tell me, why are there only one set of footprints in the sand when I am distressed?” She looked up to the sky, and her eyes filled with tears. The wind caught her hair and danced with it. No answer. Selene sank down to the sand, her one hand grabbing a hold of it and then letting it fly away.
Then all of a sudden came the bright shimmering light. Selene did not wake up from her dream as she covered her eyes from the blinding force. The winds stopped, the clouds dispersed, and all at once Selene felt the beauty of her dream being restored and strengthened. But the blessings did not end there.
He called out to her. “My precious, precious child, I am here with you.”
Selene precariously opened one eye and looked around. The sight that she saw caused her gaze to open up completely, widening at wonder. Pegasus was there, right in front of her, waiting there for her to come to him! Never had he looked so pure, so white, so absolutely refreshing. Selene gasped as she looked around as everything glowed with a shimmering sparkle. She stumbled as she tried to get up, she was so astounded and completely amazed.
Then her eyes fell once more upon Pegasus and she started to him, tripping on her skirts. When she was only a couple of steps away, her doubts jumped into her mind once more. She halted. “Wait,” she said slowly.
He said nothing, so she continued on, saying, “Pegasus ... I saw the scenes from my life across the sky. And I saw the footprints, too.” He nodded. Selene struggled to keep her thoughts straight. “Well ... I was wondering why ... why you left me when I was going through the sad times of my life. They are the only scenes that have only one set of footprints in the sand.” She looked down. “I don’t understand why you would leave me, right when I would need you the most, I think.”
Pegasus waited until she looked back up at him before he said, “My precious child, I love you so much. I have been with you, walked with you since the day that you were born, and even long before that. I would never leave you. It is during those times of trial in your life, when you saw only one set of footprints in the sand, it was then that I carried you.”
Selene felt her heart leap with untold elation at his clarifying words. She smiled, and even then she couldn’t contain her joy. A hearty laugh escaped her, and she jumped up with a renewed spirit. She felt her hands encircle around her beloved dream guardian, and she continued to laugh joyfully as he held onto her.
“I have been waiting for you to turn your eyes upon me once more. There is something I want you to see,” he whispered softly. “Please, will you come with me?”
Selene nodded her head, still holding onto him as her dream faded away.
“WAIT!” SELENE CRIED out as she found herself back in the human world. “No! I didn’t get a chance to find out what it was that Pegasus wanted to show me!” She sat up and found that she was still holding her hands over her ears. She also realized that there was no sound coming from the outside anymore. She looked over and saw that the rain had stopped and the thunder and lightning had been rendered silent once more.
“Huh?” She got up and hurried out onto the balcony, and felt her heart soar at the familiar beauty of her city below. “Wow, everything looks beautiful,” she whispered in awe.
“Yes, and this is just one city around this world.”
Selene jerked aro
und to find that Pegasus was flying right beside her balcony. “Pegasus! You’re really here ... am I still asleep?”
“No, you are awake in the human world once more,” Pegasus assured her. “I am here in your world, as real to you in this one as I am in the realm of your dreams.”
“Incredible!” Selene exclaimed happily. “I thought that you were sent only to the dream world.”
Pegasus shook his head as he flew. “The time has come for the power of Crystallon to be opened up to those who are sick with the Dark Plague here on Sapphira. I am acting according to the perfect will. I have been given the strength to get through to this world.”
Selene took a step closer to him. “I don’t understand,” she told him.
“Come with me,” Pegasus invited her, flying down to the balcony in order that she could climb on him. “There is so much I wish to tell you, my precious one.”
Selene hesitated for a moment. “Are you sure it’s all right to sit on your back?” she asked. “And I won’t fall off?”
“Trust me,” Pegasus smiled at her. “I will not let you fall. I have carried you before.”
Selene did not recall him ever carrying her, but she realized that it had been because she had been so distracted by looking at the trouble around her. Of course he had carried her before. It was only by his mercy that he was here now, wasn’t it?
She took a hold of his mane and climbed on, nearly screaming as she slumped forward on him as he began to fly with her. Suddenly Selene looked down at her High Tower, and laughed as her chains were broken and she experienced that freedom that she had been longing for since she could dream. She could almost hear the snap of the chains as they were forced away from her, with the power of Pegasus pulling her away from the binding of her sorrows, her pains, and her sufferings. Under the wings of Pegasus, she felt no burden of her former life.