by Marie Force
While she desperately wanted the baby she might not be carrying, the thought of three children under the age of five was daunting, to say the least. Thomas and Hailey were well-behaved, good sleepers and relatively easy kids, but parenthood was a lot of work. It was an all-consuming proposition.
Mac had said if they were going to have three kids, they may as well have them close in age so they could all grow up together the way he had with his siblings and she had with her sister. While she bought into that rationale, she hoped she could handle two babies in diapers at the same time.
“You’re getting a bit ahead of yourself,” she whispered. She didn’t even know for sure that she was pregnant, and she was already making plans. By the time Victoria knocked on the door, Maddie was practically trembling from the bout of nerves.
“All righty,” Victoria said with her usual peppy enthusiasm for all things reproductive, “let’s see what we’ve got. You know the drill.” She pulled on gloves and settled Maddie’s feet into the stirrups that magically appeared at the end of the table.
While Victoria poked and prodded from the inside and outside, Maddie stared up at the ceiling, trying to prepare herself for the possibility of a false alarm.
“Your uterus is slightly enlarged, but that could be left over from Hailey, so I don’t want to say anything for certain until we get the test results back. You can go ahead and sit up. If you want to get dressed and meet me in my office, I’ll go move the lab along.”
“Thanks, Vic.” Disappointed to not yet have a definitive verdict, Maddie got dressed and went to Victoria’s office at the end of the hall.
“They need a few more minutes, so have a seat. Can I get you some coffee or anything?”
“No, thank you.”
Victoria’s cell phone rang, and she glanced at it longingly.
“Go ahead,” Maddie said with a laugh. “It’s just me.”
Victoria grinned. “I’ll be quick.” She picked up the phone. “Hey there. No, I’m at work. Where are you?” She listened for a few minutes. “Sure, that sounds good. Meet me here at five? All right, see you then.” After another pause that turned her face bright red, Victoria said, “I’m hanging up now.” She put down the phone and seemed embarrassed to look at Maddie. “Sorry about that.”
“So who is he?” Maddie asked with a teasing smile.
“Um, well… Do you know Seamus O’Grady?”
“Sure. I love Seamus.”
“It’s his cousin, Shannon. We’ve been seeing each other.”
“If he’s anything like Seamus…”
“He’s just like Seamus, only younger and even hotter, if that’s possible.”
Maddie fanned her face. “Hot damn, girl. Good for you.”
“It’s been very good for me, if you catch my drift.”
They shared a laugh that descended quickly into hysterics that went a long way toward relieving Maddie’s tension. “Thank you,” Maddie said as she wiped up laughter tears. “I needed that.”
“Happy to help, even if it’s frightfully unprofessional to be dishing about my sex life with my patients.”
“Oh please, we’ve been through two pregnancies together, and you had your hand up my hoo-ha five minutes ago. I think it’s safe to say we’re friends by now.”
Maddie’s statement set Victoria off again, and the two of them were mopping up more tears when someone knocked on the door.
“Enter,” Victoria called.
“Test results you’re waiting for,” the receptionist said, eyeing the two of them with curiosity.
Maddie figured they probably were red-faced and silly looking after their laughing fit.
“Thank you,” Victoria said, scanning the page and then smiling. “Congrats, Mom. Looks like we’re going for three.”
Maddie promptly burst into tears that had nothing to do with laughter. She wasn’t sure if it was relief or fear that had her sobbing like a fool.
Victoria got up and came around her desk. “What’s this? I thought you’d be thrilled.”
“I am,” Maddie said between sobs. “I’m thrilled.”
“Um, you don’t look thrilled.”
“I’ve been on this roller-coaster ride of emotions this week, thinking I was pregnant and then being convinced I wasn’t and now finding out I am when my friend Syd is dying to be pregnant, and it’s not fair that I’m having a ‘whoops’ baby when she wants one so badly.”
“Wow, that’s a whole lot of hormones in one sentence.”
“See? I’m a wreck. How will I handle three kids under the age of five?”
“As beautifully as you handle two of them. If anyone can do it, you can. Think of it this way, at least yours are coming one at a time, unlike your friend Laura, who’s having twins.”
“That’s true,” Maddie said, wiping her tears.
“It’s all going to be fine. I promise. You’ll have a couple of crazy years, and then you’ll be on to the easy stuff like school and teenagers and driving.”
Maddie sobbed anew at the thought of those unimaginable worries.
“Too far?” Victoria asked.
“Maybe just a bit.”
Victoria started laughing again, and before she knew it, Maddie was laughing while she cried.
“My husband is going to leave me,” Maddie said.
Victoria’s face went flat with shock. “No… No way.”
Seized by sobs and tears and laughter, Maddie waved a hand. “He doesn’t have any plans to leave right now. That I know of, anyway. But if I’m going to be like this for nine months, he’s going to be long gone before this baby arrives.”
“He will not. That guy is crazy about you.”
“Let’s hope so, because he hasn’t seen crazy yet.”
“Go take a nice bath and pamper yourself.”
Maddie took the tissues Victoria offered and wiped her face. “Sorry to be such a spaz. I’ve been a mess all week.”
“You’re not a mess, Maddie. You’re pregnant.”
“I’m a pregnant mess.”
“It’ll feel better when the shock wears off. I promise.”
Nodding, Maddie picked up her purse, stood and gave Victoria a hug. “Thanks for putting up with me.”
“No problem. Set up an appointment for an ultrasound, and we’ll get you a due date on your next visit, and confirm there’s only one in there.”
Maddie blanched at the very idea of more than one. “Too far again.”
Victoria covered her mouth to hold in the laughter.
“Good luck with your sexy Irishman.”
“Why, thank you,” Victoria said with a wink. “I hope to get very lucky later.”
Shaking her head at Victoria’s irreverence, Maddie went to the reception desk to make an appointment for a follow-up visit. She’d be hard-pressed to keep Mac away from that one. Here she was with a three-year-old and a nine-month-old and another on the way. Her already too large breasts would be explosive again in no time, the stretch marks from the last time had finally begun to fade, and she’d only recently been able to fit into her regular clothes again.
And now she was going to do it all again. Maddie trudged out of the clinic into the sweltering heat, blinded by bright sunshine, despite the sunglasses she pulled from the top of her head to cover her raw eyes. She headed for her SUV, stopping short at the sight of her husband leaning against the vehicle, arms folded and blue-eyed gaze pinned on her.
“What’re you doing here?” she asked, less surprised to see him than she probably should’ve been.
“Waiting for you.”
Maddie took a few more steps that brought her to within inches of him. He never failed to take her breath away when he looked at her as if his every hope and dream were tied up with her, which they were. And hers were just as tied up with him.
“Where else was I supposed to be when you were finding out whether we’re having another baby?” He reached out and flipped her sunglasses up, making her wince from the shock of the sunlight
on her aching eyes. “You’ve been crying. So it’s a no?” Before she had a chance to respond, she was wrapped in his strong arms, sobbing all over again. “I’m so sorry, honey. We’ll try again next month. We’ll try every month until we get it right.”
She shook her head.
“You don’t want to try again?”
“We don’t have to.”
“I’m confused.”
“I’m pregnant.”
As long as she lived, she’d never forget the expression on his face when her words registered with him. Shock, amazement, awe, love… And then his eyes filled with tears, and she fell in love with him all over again. “You are? Really?”
“Really.”
He crushed her to him, holding her so tight she could barely breathe.
She held on just as tightly to him, her rock, her love, her life.
“If the news was good, why were you crying?” he asked after he held her for several minutes.
“Because I can’t not cry. It seems to be all I do lately.”
“Have I told you today how much I love you?” he asked.
“Don’t be nice to me. It makes me cry.”
His hands on her face made her feel loved and treasured. “I love you more than anything. You have no idea how happy you’ve made me—today and every day.”
“So you’re happy about the baby? Even though we didn’t plan him? Or her?”
“How could I not be thrilled about a baby we’re having together, no matter how he or she came to be? It’s our baby, Maddie. Yours and mine, and I’ll love him—or her—as much as I love you and Thomas and Hailey.”
Maddie held on tight to him, fortified as always by his love.
“But you’ll be having this one in the biggest, safest hospital I can find—on the mainland. You got me?”
“Yes, Mac. I’ve got you.” And she was never, ever letting go.
David discharged Marion Martinez at two o’clock with instructions to follow a bland diet for a couple of days. Paul had left to deal with the store and its employees while Alex waited with their mother, who’d been asking every two minutes when his father was coming to get her. The same question, repeated over and over again, had worn on Alex’s already frayed nerves.
“I’ll just wait for Daddy,” she said when Alex told her it was time to go home.
“Dad isn’t coming,” Alex said.
“Of course he is. He always comes for me.”
“He died, Mom. Ten years ago. You know this.”
“Why would you say such an awful thing?” she asked, horrified. “What have we ever done to you to deserve such behavior? We’ve loved you and cared for you and put up with your nonsense.”
Nonsense, he wanted to ask. What nonsense? As far as he knew, he and his brother had been model sons. But if he asked the question, it would only further agitate her, and that was the last thing he wanted to do.
“I’m waiting for your father, and that’s the end of it.”
“Marion,” David said as he came into the room. “I just heard from George, and he said he got tied up at a job. He wants you to go home with Alex, and he’ll meet you there.”
Alex waited breathlessly to hear what she’d say.
“Well, let’s go, Alex. I don’t want to keep your father waiting.”
As Alex pushed the wheelchair out of the room, he looked at David. “I could kiss you right now,” Alex said under his breath.
“That’s a lovely offer, but I think I’ll pass.”
David walked alongside Alex as he pushed the chair to the main door of the clinic. “You’re a lifesaver, David. In more ways than one.”
“Happy to help. Call me if you need anything—day or night.”
“We’ll never be able to properly thank you.”
“You don’t need to. This is why I spent all those years in school. I wanted to be able to help people.”
“You’re making one hell of a difference for our family. Don’t ever doubt that.”
“That’s nice to hear. I’ll wait with your mom while you get the truck.”
Alex jogged across the parking lot, taking note of a few aches and pains he couldn’t attribute entirely to the hard work he did every day. He’d been dying to call Jenny, just to hear her voice if nothing else, but he’d held off until he could focus entirely on her.
With the air-conditioning blasting, he drove up to the clinic entrance and got out to help his mother into the truck.
“Turn down that horrible air-conditioning, Alex. I’m freezing.”
“You have to be the only person in the state of Rhode Island who’s freezing today.”
David laughed at their banter as he waved them off and went back inside with the wheelchair.
“You’re driving too fast,” his mother said when Alex pulled out of the clinic onto Ocean Road.
“I’m barely moving.”
“Don’t talk back to your mother.”
Alex bit the inside of his cheek to keep from snapping at her. She couldn’t help it. Maybe if he kept telling himself that, he’d eventually believe it. He drove home as slowly as he possibly could. By the time he turned into the driveway to Martinez Lawn & Garden, a line of cars was piled up behind him, but at least his mother wasn’t angry with him.
Before the illness, she’d hardly said a cross word to him or Paul in their entire lives. She’d been a strict mother who set high expectations for her sons, but she’d also been kind and sweet and generous. He missed those qualities the most. The dementia made her angry, suspicious and impulsive, among other things that were hard to live with.
An hour later, he had his mother settled in her bed for a nap before dinner. Alex wandered into the living room and stretched out on the sofa. The workday was a total bust, and he couldn’t leave his mother alone anyway. He withdrew his cell phone from his pocket and went through the text messages from clients as well as a couple of friends who’d checked in to see how he was doing.
And how was he doing? Depended on when he was asked. Other than the unpleasantness with Sharon, last night had been awesome, from the moment he got to Jenny’s until Paul had called about their mom’s chest pains. Today had mostly sucked, except for when Jenny had driven him home and offered to help. That had been great. Being around her made him feel good, which was more than enough to keep him going back for more time with her.
The ups and downs of his daily life lately were nausea inducing, a thought that reminded him he needed to eat. But getting up to find food would take energy he just didn’t have, so he stayed on the sofa and called Jenny. He wanted to hear her voice. No, he needed to hear it, which was a thought that should’ve scared the shit out of him. But it didn’t. The thought of her soothed him.
“Mmm, hello?”
“Hey, it’s me. Were you sleeping?”
“Yeah. I conked out. How’s your mom?”
Alex pictured her in her bed, her face rosy from sleep. “Home and resting in her own bed.”
“Glad to hear it,” she said. “And how are you?”
“I feel like someone beat the shit out of me.”
“Funny, I feel the same way. I’ve been wondering if it might be more than a night without sleep and other stuff…”
“Other stuff?” he asked with a laugh. “Is that what we’re calling it?”
“What would you call it? No, wait, don’t answer that. I’m afraid of what you’ll say.”
He’d been on the phone with her for five minutes, and he was already grinning like a loon. “Can I come over later?”
“Sure, but I’ll warn you, I may have the flu, and there’s not going to be any ‘other stuff.’”
“Are you sore?”
“That might not be a good enough word for what I am.”
“I know just the thing to fix you right up.”
“Not. Happening.”
Chuckling, he said, “What’re your flu symptoms?”
“Complete lack of interest in anything resembling food, general lethargy a
nd a possible fever.”
“Ugh, a fever in this heat?”
“I know. It’s a drag.”
“I’ll come over when I can bust free here. Not sure what time it’ll be.”
“I’m not going anywhere. I was supposed to get together with my friends, but I already called to tell them I’m staying home. If it is the flu, they don’t need it—and neither do you, for that matter.”
“The way I see it, I’ve already been extremely well exposed to whatever’s ailing you, so there’s no reason for you to be miserable alone.”
“I suppose you have a point.”
“Mmm, yes, I do, and he’d really like to see you again.”
“Alex! Oh my God! You’re like a fifteen-year-old boy!”
“I know, right? I didn’t hear you complaining about my stamina last night.”
“I’m hanging up now.”
“I’ll be over when I can.”
“I’ll leave the door unlocked for you.”
“Jenny…”
“Yes?”
“I can’t wait to see you.” He ended the call before she could reply. Let her think about that until he saw her again. As he closed his eyes to take a quick nap, he smiled at the thought of seeing her soon. He really couldn’t wait.
Maddie was frightfully late to the gathering at Syd’s house to plan Tiffany’s shower, but she had a good excuse. She and Mac had run away together for the afternoon, since his parents had the kids, and they had a rare opportunity to spend some time alone. Hours after she’d gotten the happy news from Victoria, Maddie still wasn’t sure if she should tell her friends or hold off because of Sydney’s situation.
She hadn’t resolved the internal debate when she gave a quick knock on Syd’s door and stepped into the house. “Hello?”
“Out here,” Sydney called from the back deck.
Maddie went through the kitchen to the sliding door.
“Grab a glass of wine and come on out,” Sydney said. “We found a breeze.”
“If you can call it that,” Stephanie muttered. She was fanning herself with the latest issue of the Gansett Gazette.