Ben’s eyes suddenly snapped open and he sat bolt upright in bed, his eyes staring, causing the children to huddle together but then catching sight of the two frightened little faces he forced himself to relax.
‘Good morning, you two. Sleep well, did you?’ There was no answer, so he went on. ‘How’s about we have a bit of a wash and go down an’ see what the landlady has for our breakfast, eh?’
It was only when they had washed as best they could with the cold water in the jug that Ben realised he had no clothes or even a hairbrush for them and that could prove to be a problem with no clothing coupons.
‘We’ll just finger-comb your hair for now,’ he told Daisy, as he awkwardly tried to tie the springy curls into a ribbon at the nape of her neck.
‘We haven’t got our toothbrushes neither,’ Daisy told him accusingly. ‘And Mummy says we should clean our teeth every morning and every night before we go to bed.’
‘And quite right Mummy is,’ Ben said cheerfully. ‘But don’t worry. We’ll go and buy you both new ones right after breakfast.’
As they descended the stairs of the small house the landlady – a small, grubby-faced woman with a hooked nose and untidy grey hair who put Daisy in mind of the witch in one of her story books – appeared from a door in the hallway.
‘Ah, good morning,’ Ben greeted her cheerfully for the sake of the children. ‘I hope we’re not too late for breakfast?’
‘Breakfast? Where d’yer think you are, the Ritz?’ the old woman snorted derisively. ‘Yer won’t get no breakfast ’ere on the money you paid for the room, sonny!’
Daisy had shrunk into Thomas’s side and now even Thomas looked wary.
‘Will yer be wantin’ the room again tonight? If yer will I wants the money up front. Rooms is ’ard to come by round ’ere an’ yer were lucky to find it!’
‘Er … thank you but no,’ Ben told her hastily, and he ushered the children out into the street.
‘Are we goin’ home now?’ Daisy asked tearfully, raising her frightened face to Ben’s.
‘Well, we’ll see. There’s so much to do first,’ he told her, taking a firm grip on her hand.
As they walked through the ruined streets both children became more and more distressed. This London was nothing like the one they had looked at in Miss Price’s picture books at school. This London was dirty, dismal and cold with ruins of what had once been houses everywhere they looked.
‘It’s not all like this,’ Ben tried to reassure them. ‘So, we’ll go and have a good breakfast in a café somewhere and then we’ll find somewhere nice to go.’ Although secretly he wondered if there was anywhere nice left in London. The Luftwaffe had done a very good job of destroying the place since he had last been there. At last they found a small café in a back street and Ben urged them inside out of the cold.
‘I’ll have three teas and three lots of eggs on toast,’ he told the woman behind the counter who had a cigarette dangling from her lips and a newspaper spread out in front of her.
‘Only got powdered eggs,’ she told him abruptly.
‘Oh, I see … then perhaps three bacon and sausage with toast?’ Ben was trying desperately to keep his patience. The woman clearly didn’t care if she served them or not, but the children were hungry.
‘No bacon, only sausages!’
‘Then that will do nicely, thank you.’
He slapped the money down on the counter and returned to the children whose eyes were fixed on him.
The tea when it finally came was lukewarm and unsweetened and the sausages were so hard that Ben was certain he could have soled his shoes with them, but they were all hungry, so they ate them anyway.
‘Now,’ he said when they had eaten. ‘Where would you like to go?’
‘Home,’ the children chorused, and Ben wished he hadn’t asked them. But then he supposed it was early days. Once they got to know him, they would come to love him, wouldn’t they?
‘We’ll go and get some fresh air,’ he told them and miserably the children followed him outside.
The further they went into the city the worse the damage they witnessed but at last they came to a bridge spanning the River Thames, which had so far escaped the bombing.
‘Ugh! It’s all dirty and sludgy!’ Thomas said in disgust as they stared down at the murky brown water.
‘I need a wee!’ Daisy piped up and Ben sighed.
He hadn’t realised how hard it was to care for children. In fact, as the time wore on, he realised he hadn’t really thought about the consequences of taking the children at all. There was no way Kathy would have just let them disappear without raising a hue and cry and even now every policeman in London could be out looking for him. And he still had no idea how he was going to clothe them considering he had no clothing coupons. He also needed to find them somewhere a little more salubrious than the place they had stayed in the previous night, before it got dark. The days were short now and it was so cold that there was no pleasure whatsoever in wandering the streets. They trudged on, knocking on doors, hoping to find decent lodgings. Because he guessed the police would be looking for him, Ben didn’t dare risk staying at a hotel, even though he could well have afforded it. But hotels would probably be the first places the police would look and so Ben was limited in his options. But it was pointless, thousands of people had lost their homes and every place he tried turned him away, until eventually he had no option but to return to the house they had stayed in the night before.
‘Huh! I thought yer’d be back,’ the old woman scoffed when she answered his knock at the door. ‘Want the room again, do yer?’
Ben forced himself to smile pleasantly. ‘Yes, please.’
‘Then give us the money.’ She sniffed. ‘I don’t want yer clearin’ orf in the mornin’ wi’out payin’. An’ what’s up wi’ the little ’un?’ She nodded towards Daisy who was crying with the cold.
‘Oh, she’s just tired,’ Ben said hurriedly as he pushed the children onto the cracked and faded lino in the hallway. He handed the money over and shooed the children ahead of him up the stairs.
‘An’ don’t forget to pull them blackout blinds afore yer turn the light on,’ the landlady’s voice followed him, and he gritted his teeth. She really was the most unreasonable little woman he had ever had the misfortune to meet!
The bedroom felt only slightly warmer than outside and Daisy was crying again now.
‘Look, can I trust you to watch your sister for a little while?’ Ben asked Thomas. ‘I saw a fish and chip shop just down the road. I’ll run and get us all some, that’ll make you both feel better, won’t it? And then we can snuggle down in our beds and get warm.’
Thomas nodded hesitantly and Ben slipped away leaving the children alone.
‘I want to go home,’ Daisy whined tearfully.
‘So do I,’ Thomas admitted, bitterly regretting ever agreeing to go with Ben in the first place. They huddled together, listening to every little sound that reached them from the road outside.
Soon Ben returned bearing three small parcels wrapped in newspaper. ‘Here we are.’ He placed a parcel each on their laps. ‘Lovely, piping-hot fish, chips and mushy peas.’
The children ate every scrap and did feel a little better with their stomachs full. They then got undressed down to their underwear and scrambled into bed and despite feeling so homesick they were fast asleep in no time, their arms tightly wrapped about each other.
Tomorrow I shall tell them who I really am, Ben promised himself as he stared down at their little faces. They’re bound to love me and want to be with me when they know that I’m their real dad. On that comforting thought he too climbed into bed and slept.
Chapter Forty-Eight
Early in December, the residents of Treetops sat in the kitchen listening to the radio, their faces grave as they heard that Japan was now at war with the United States and Britain. Several hours earlier 360 Japanese warplanes had made a huge surprise attack on the US Pacific fleet in its home b
ase at Pearl Harbor in Hawaii.
‘The Yanks will become involved now,’ George said solemnly. ‘An’ it might not be a bad thing. We need all the help we can get at the minute.’
Sunday nodded in agreement as she glanced towards Kathy, who was standing at the window staring off down the drive, just as she had every single day since the children had gone missing. The police were still doing their best to find them but up to now their search had been fruitless and it was as if the children had disappeared off the face of the earth as the endless days stretched on.
Sunday doubted if Kathy had even heard about the attack on Pearl Harbor. She listened keenly for news of London, terrified that it was being bombed again, but if it was about anything else, she turned away. All she could think about were the children, which was understandable. She had not been to the hospital once since they had gone missing, but Matron had been very understanding about it and had even taken the trouble to visit Kathy at home when she’d found out what had happened.
‘Just take as much time off as you need,’ she had told her kindly, even though the hospital was dreadfully short-staffed. ‘And don’t give up hope.’
Hope was all Kathy had to cling to now and every minute she prayed her babies would come home, but as time wore on – each day seeming like a lifetime – the possibility of her ever seeing them again seemed to be more remote.
She had lost weight and her eyes were haunted but there was nothing anyone could do to help her; nothing anyone could say to make her feel better. All they could do was pray that the nightmare might soon be over, and the children would be back where they belonged again.
In London Ben was also feeling the strain. He and the children had spent the last few nights in a shelter in the underground station close to where they were still staying in the grubby little bed and breakfast. He had managed to find the children some ill-fitting clothes on a second-hand stall in the local market, but the children constantly cried to go home now, even Daisy who at first had tried to be brave for Thomas. The stress of caring for them and knowing that they didn’t trust or like him was beginning to tell on Ben and the nightmares had returned with a vengeance. The children would lie in their bed watching with terrified eyes as he thrashed about and called out in his sleep. Often now a whole day could go by without them even saying so much as a single word to him. One night, Daisy came up with the solution to their problem.
‘Soon as he goes out next time we’re going to run away,’ she whispered to her brother.
‘B-but where will we run to? We don’t know our way home,’ Thomas whimpered.
Daisy frowned, then came up with an idea. ‘We’ll find a policeman an’ tell him that he took us away from our mum. Granma always told us to do that if we got lost.’
Ben had sat them down and told them that he was their father some time ago but neither of the children believed him. Their mum had told them that David was going to be their dad, so this man must be lying.
Now Thomas nodded. ‘All right, but we’ll have to be careful,’ he whispered back. ‘If we run away an’ he finds us he’ll be angry.’
They huddled together in the darkened room waiting for daylight when they could hopefully put their plan into action. Apart from being taken to the shelter when the air raid sirens sounded, they had barely been out of the room for the last two weeks for it was far too cold now to be walking the streets. Ben would go off from time to time and bring back food for them then get annoyed when they refused to eat it.
‘You’ll be ill if you don’t eat,’ he had snapped the day before when he had returned to the room with hot pies, which they showed no interest in.
Sometimes Ben would shout at them with frustration, at other times he would get upset and tell them how much he loved them, but the children didn’t believe that any more than they believed he was their father. Everyone at Treetops loved them and they never shouted at the them, or made them stay in cold, smelly rooms for days on end. And then there was his constant pacing. Up and down, up and down the room he would go, muttering to himself as if the children weren’t even there, until they would cling together shaking with fear, cold and hunger.
Their chance soon came when later the following morning Ben put his coat on and told them, ‘I’m going to go and get us some breakfast. I shan’t be long.’
He smiled at them and left, closing the door softly behind him and they listened carefully as his footsteps clattered away down the bare wooden staircase.
‘Right, Thomas, grab your coat,’ Daisy told him, her heart hammering. ‘He won’t be gone for long so’s we have to be quick.’
Thomas hurriedly did as he was told, fumbling with the buttons on his coat and side by side they approached the door. They sighed with relief to find it unlocked then inched it open. Satisfied there was no one in sight Daisy took her brother’s hand. ‘Come on but be quiet. We don’t want the witch stopping us from getting out.’
Step by step the children tiptoed down the staircase and at last they found themselves in the damp-smelling hallway. Thankfully there was no sign of the landlady, so they approached the front door. It creaked alarmingly when Thomas managed to open it but at last they were standing on the pavement outside in a thick smog.
‘W-which way shall we go?’ Daisy asked falteringly. She could barely see more than a few feet ahead of her and suddenly she was frightened. What would Ben do to them if he found them trying to run away from him?
Thomas glanced up and down the street. They could hear the ship’s hooters in the docks, which were not very far away, and making a decision he took her hand and told her, ‘Let’s go this way.’ He led her away from the noise and at the end of the road they came to a slightly busier one.
Thomas swallowed as he looked up and down at the passing traffic. Suddenly he had taken charge for a change. ‘Look for a policeman,’ he instructed her as, keeping close to the wall, they moved on. Suddenly the all-too-familiar sound of an air raid siren pierced the air and Daisy froze, her eyes stretched wide with fear. Suddenly people were running past them, as if they were invisible. They flattened themselves against a wall.
‘What shall we do now?’ Daisy asked fearfully as she clung to Thomas’s hand like a limpet. At that moment a middle-aged lady wielding a large wicker shopping basket stopped abruptly right in front of them
‘My dears, whatever are you doing out here all alone?’ Her voice was kindly, and Daisy started to cry as she and Thomas stared numbly up at her.
‘Look, come with me, we need to get you into a shelter.’ She ushered them in front of her and at the end of a street she shooed them into an open doorway and down some steps. They found themselves in a large cellar that had clearly been adapted into a shelter and she told them reassuringly, ‘You’ll be safe here now until the raid is over and then you must go home.’
Daisy and Thomas slid onto a long bench that was fast filling with people and soon after there was a loud droning overhead and the sound of the ack-ack guns began to sound.
Shortly after they heard loud whistling noises followed by earth-shaking explosions as yet more bombs were dropped on the already dreadfully damaged city and the children could only sit there and pray that it would be over soon. As the day wore on there seemed to be no let-up and eventually someone lit some oil lamps, casting ghostly shadows over the faces of those that were sheltering there. A baby was crying, and small children were becoming fractious as their mothers tried to entertain them but at last the all-clear sounded and slowly the people rose and began to leave, afraid of what they would find above ground. Taking his sister’s hand Thomas encouraged, ‘Come on, we can’t stay here on us own.’
It was then that the kindly lady who had taken them there stopped in front of them again to ask, ‘Will you be all right getting home by yourselves? Have you far to go?’
For a while, the children stared numbly up at her and then starting to cry again, Daisy blurted out, ‘We don’t know our way home. It’s a long way away. Ben took us away from o
ur mummy.’
Bending to her level, the lady took a large white handkerchief from her pocket and mopped at Daisy’s tear-stained face before saying, ‘Right, I think we need to find someone to help you. Just stay there for a while, I’ll be back very soon, I promise.’
True to her word she was back moments later with an ARP warden who smiled at them encouragingly.
‘Right then, children,’ he said cheerily. ‘This ’ere lady says you need some ’elp. Why don’t you tell me all about what’s been goin’ on, eh?’
And so, between them the children haltingly told them all about Ben taking them from school and making them stay with him and when they were done, he asked, ‘An’ where is this Ben now?’
Daisy shook her head. ‘We don’t know. We stayed in a smelly little room an’ when he went out this morning to get us some food we run away. We want to go home to our mum!’
‘Of course you do.’ The man patted her head. ‘Let’s get you down to the police station, eh? The policeman can let your mum know where you are then and you’ll be home in no time, you just see if you ain’t, me beauties.’
And so, they trustingly allowed him to take their hands and lead them out into the bomb-damaged streets, praying that he was telling the truth and their nightmare might soon be over.
Chapter Forty-Nine
‘Here we are then,’ Ben said cheerfully as he entered the small rented room holding a bag of food. ‘I’ve got us a few …’ His voice trailed away as he stared at the children’s empty bed and his heart sank.
‘Thomas … Daisy …’ he called, as if speaking their names might make them miraculously appear, but only silence greeted him and he sank heavily onto the side of the bed as the bag fell from his hands, scattering the contents all over the floor. They had gone. His attempts at being a father to them had failed dismally. He should have realised how unhappy they were. When the air raid siren started to wail, he just sat on, not much caring if he lived or died. He had made a complete mess of his life and he had nothing left to live for. Curling himself into a ball on the crumpled sheets he started to shake. It would be pointless trying to find them, they could be anywhere by now, but if they should be killed in the raid it would be all his fault for taking them away from the safety of their home. As the enormity of what he had done struck home he began to cry great gulping sobs that threatened to choke him.
Time to Say Goodbye Page 28