“Should we, uh, do something about that?” Ravi asked, waving a hand behind him in the general direction of Daks’s midsection. Daks snorted and Ravi’s cheeks flamed hotter.
“Your bandage. Your stitches,” he qualified.
“You could come check it out for me if you’d like,” Daks replied with a smile in his voice.
Ravi tried to glare at him, but Daks just shrugged and lowered himself into the pool with a hiss and shiver. He began washing himself and his clothes while Ravi hovered uncertainly on the bank.
When minutes passed and Ravi still hadn’t joined him, Daks let out a heavy sigh and said, “If you’re feeling prudish, find another pool upstream and set to. The sun isn’t going to get any higher, and we have a few more miles to go before we reach any settlements around Traget. We’ll miss the last ferry tonight, but I’d like to find Vasin’s cousin, drop off the horses, and find somewhere to settle before true dark sets in.”
“Fine,” Ravi huffed, lifting his chin stubbornly, “but at least turn around and give me some privacy.”
Daks’s mocking smile faded as he shot an odd glance over his shoulder at the river before rolling his eyes and turning his back to Ravi. The man had churned up the silt a bit in the pool where he was, so Ravi should try to find a cleaner spot upriver. But with his luck, he’d have a Vision and drown, or something else equally horrible would happen.
At least that’s what he told himself as he began to disrobe.
He brought his soiled clothes with him into the water to try to wash the worst of the muck off, as Daks had done. The water was cold enough to make him gasp, but he gritted his teeth and plunged in anyway.
Without soap, his clothes wouldn’t be anywhere near as clean as when he’d received them, but they’d be slightly more presentable. When he turned back after pounding a particularly difficult stain on the rocks, he found Daks watching him as he the man bobbed lazily in the water nearby.
“It’s not as cold, once you get used to it,” Daks murmured.
His eyes had gone a little heavy-lidded, and his voice had deepened and softened somehow. Feeling uncomfortable and a little short of breath, Ravi shook his head and turned his back again.
“You’re crazy. It’s still freezing.”
Small waves lapped at his hips as he felt Daks approach, but Ravi didn’t turn around.
“I could help warm you up if you like.”
Daks’s voice was downright husky, and a shiver ran down Ravi’s spine that had nothing to do with the icy water. If he weren’t already covered in goose bumps, he would have been now, and his sudden difficulty breathing had nothing to do with the line of bruises across his chest.
He stood frozen, clutching his wet clothes, the air heavy and silent but for their breathing and the rush of the river beyond their quiet, secluded little pool.
Why not?
This hadn’t exactly been what he’d dreamed of for his first real sexual encounter as an adult, but when had reality ever lived up to his dreams? Daks was big and warm. He was also handsome in his own peculiar way, despite being a little rough around the edges. Ravi had wondered more than once what his skin felt like, how his mouth tasted, and what those big hands would feel like on his body, touching sensually rather than clinically.
It had been so long since he’d been able to really touch anyone. His hands suddenly ached to map the planes of Daks’s body, to feel the ridges of muscle and bone and trace the scars with his fingertips, but he gripped the clothes tighter in his fists and swallowed against the need vibrating through his body.
Why not? Because I can’t risk it. That’s why not.
Not yet anyway.
He didn’t have the strength to actually step away from all that offered heat and comfort, but he had enough to clear his throat and say, “I thought you said we needed to get going.”
“I suppose a couple of minutes here or there wouldn’t hurt,” Daks replied, the shrug obvious in his tone.
That note of indifference broke the spell. This was not what Ravi wanted. A couple of minutes of stolen pleasure with a virtual stranger wasn’t worth the risk. He wanted more… at least a bed, for Harot’s sake. Besides, Daks had either ignored him or growled at him all day—except for the part where he jumped in the bog and rescued him from drowning.
Why did the man have to be so confusing?
With an enormous exertion of willpower, Ravi stepped to the side and climbed up the bank, uncaring that Daks was watching.
“No, you were right before,” he said, his voice becoming more determined as he spoke. “We should push on. I’m hungry and I’m cold.”
He didn’t bother to look back as he dried himself as best he could on his cloak and dressed in his old clothes. Despite being freshly cleaned and mended better than he’d ever managed on his own, the feel of their worn, patched layers against his skin was comfortingly familiar. And when he donned his slightly damp, ratty old cloak and his ratty old boots and tugged the hood up to hide his face, he breathed out a sigh of relief. This was who he was… for now, anyway.
No more touching. No more letting his guard down.
Maybe when they’d crossed the Matna into Samebar and were safely nestled into an inn, he might reconsider Daks’s offer. That is, if the man wanted to repeat it when there might be more tempting options available. But that was a chance he’d have to take.
Without waiting for Daks, he bundled up his wet, soiled clothes and headed back to where they’d left the others. Daks didn’t say anything when he returned a few minutes later, dressed in his old leather breeches and tunic. His expression was unreadable as he encouraged everyone to mount up. He didn’t look as cross as he had earlier. He didn’t even look disappointed, which niggled Ravi’s pride a little. Obviously, Ravi’s rejection didn’t hurt that much, which should have made him feel better, affirming that he’d made the right choice. But it still stung, and he kept his back ramrod stiff and rode in stony silence for the rest of their journey.
The ground and air dried out significantly the farther they traveled away from the boglands, and Ravi sighed in relief when the horses finally turned onto the broad, wonderfully dry King’s Road, despite the increased danger they were in.
As they drew nearer to Traget, the houses along the road grew closer together and more and more people appeared, going about their daily business. Ravi hunched deeper inside his cloak and stared at the back of the stallion’s head, praying silently to any god who would listen to take pity on him for once and keep his Visions at bay. He’d been concentrating so hard on not looking at anyone that he jumped when Horse finally stopped and Daks dismounted.
Blinking blearily in the fading light, he spotted a small cabin with a light in the window and a smoking chimney a short distance away.
“If Vasin’s directions are correct, this should be the place,” Daks said as Shura and Mistress Sabin also dismounted. “We’ve obviously missed the last ferry, so let’s see if this cousin of Vasin’s will allow us to set up camp on his land tonight, and we’ll head for the ferry at first light.”
“I’d also like to talk to him,” Mistress Sabin said.
Daks pursed his lips and shot a glance toward Shura before he nodded.
“How are you? Any bad feelings?”
It took Ravi a couple of seconds to realize Daks was actually talking to him for the first time since they’d left the river. When he did, his chest warmed a little at the man’s concern, until he realized Daks was asking about his curse, not his well-being.
“Nothing yet. But I probably should avoid new people as much as possible,” he admitted just a little petulantly.
“Okay, you stay here with Horse, and we’ll take Vasin’s cousin the other three animals and be back as soon as we can.”
“You’re keeping it?” Shura asked, lifting a skeptical brow.
Daks shrugged, and his lips curved ruefully. “He wasn’t part of the original bargain, and honestly, I’m not sure he’d stay wherever we put him anyway.
He likes me. What can I say?”
Shura snorted. “No accounting for taste.”
Ravi smirked in the shadows of his hood.
Daks gave her a playful scowl. “He can carry our packs, and we’ll need horses for the journey to Scholoveld anyway. He’ll be one less thing we’ll have to bargain for on the other side.”
“You’ll have to pay for his spot on the ferry.”
“We have enough,” Daks replied without meeting her gaze.
Shura studied him for a few moments before rolling her eyes. “Let’s go. I’m tired and hungry.”
Ravi climbed down from the stallion’s back as the women led the mares away. Everything ached, but that wasn’t anything new. He started to search for a good tree to settle against when he felt someone watching him. Daks had hung back from the women and was studying him with a concerned frown.
When Ravi lifted his eyebrows in question, Daks said, “We’ll be back soon. If you sense any trouble, anything at all, get on the horse and ride away. We’ll find you.”
With that pronouncement, he spun and strode off to join the others, leaving Ravi feeling irritated and confused all over again. He was having a hard time keeping up with Daks’s mood swings. One minute the man was cranky and aloof, the next concerned and solicitous, and then the next angling for a quick tumble in the reeds.
Thankfully, Daks was true to his word and returned swiftly, before sitting on the damp cold ground in the dark with only a horse for company lost its charm. Ravi’s heart skipped a beat when he first heard the crunch of boots approaching, but Daks called out to him before he could truly panic.
His relieved smile drooped in confusion when he realized Daks was alone in the circle of light provided by the lantern he carried.
“Where are the others?”
“Fara wanted to pump the man for as much information as possible, rebel business I guess, and Shura stayed to listen in.”
“Oh.”
Daks paused expectantly, but when Ravi didn’t come up with anything more intelligent than that, he shrugged. “With the number of soldiers and brothers in town, he recommended we err on the side of caution and move no closer tonight. He didn’t seem hostile, but he wasn’t as encouraging or helpful as his cousin. We’ll likely not get much more out of him than permission to stay on his land, maybe some food, and this.” Daks held up a small flask. “Fara still wanted to try to get him to open up, but I wasn’t in the mood to tiptoe and needle for hours.”
He moved to the tree next to Ravi’s and sat on the ground at its base. After uncorking the bottle, he took a swig before offering it to Ravi. “No fire tonight. Too risky with soldiers on patrol. Don’t want to draw attention unless we really have to.” Ravi accepted the bottle and nearly choked on the strong spirit it contained. “Luckily,” Daks continued as he coughed, “the night shouldn’t be too cold, although the clouds are looking a little ominous. Pray to whoever you like that the rain holds off until we’re across the river tomorrow.”
When Daks lifted his hand, Ravi returned the flask to it willingly, wiping his watering eyes.
“Settle in. Get comfortable,” Daks continued after taking another swig. “Shura said they’d try to wheedle something hot out of the guy, but if they can’t, we’ll dig out what’s left of the food in our packs when they get back.”
That seemed to be the extent of Daks’s conversation for the evening, because he leaned his head back and closed his eyes. Ravi worried his lower lip as he studied the man for a few beats in the lantern light. It appeared he would be getting distant and aloof Daks again, and he wasn’t sure if he should be relieved or disappointed.
Either Shura and Mistress Sabin were better at extracting information than Daks thought or they gave up early, because it wasn’t long before they joined them. They’d even been able to acquire some hot meat pies and a small pot of stew, and Ravi practically inhaled his portions with so much gratitude it made his eyes a little misty. He’d never complain about the food they’d cooked on the journey, but a hot meal with fresh meat, herbs, and vegetables compared to dried, was a thing of true beauty he hadn’t been allowed often enough over the last ten years to take for granted.
Daks remained mostly silent during the meal, and though he offered the flask around, no one took him up on it. After a while Ravi began to think maybe one of them should have, if only to limit the amount left for Daks, and apparently, he wasn’t the only one. He caught Shura eyeing her partner worriedly several times during the meal and after, which didn’t exactly inspire confidence. She didn’t say anything, though, and Ravi began to get angry.
Screwing up his courage, he decided to try to catch Shura alone. If anyone could get Daks to behave, it was her. Ravi certainly didn’t want to try after everything that had happened between them earlier. Besides, he might lose his temper completely and say something he shouldn’t, and he still needed these people for a few more hours at least.
When Shura rose and left their little circle of lantern light, probably to relieve herself, Ravi waited a few minutes and then followed. He hung back at the edge of the shadows to allow her some privacy, but when she returned, he held up a hand to stop her.
“I think you should do something about him,” Ravi said, his voice cracking slightly under her forbidding stare.
She didn’t bother to ask who he meant. “He’s fine.”
Ravi narrowed his eyes and lifted his chin, his temper overtaking caution. “He’s not fine. He’s been drinking from that flask since he came back. We’ve only got one more day before we’re in Samebar. He can’t wait one more day?”
Her lips pressed together as she folded her arms across her chest. “I assume you come to me because you believe I know him better than you, so accept it when I tell you he will be fine.”
Seeing that she’d dug in her heels, Ravi blew out a breath and decided to take a different tack. “But is he okay? I mean, he did save me this morning. If there’s something I can do….”
He left the words hanging, and her expression softened a little as she studied him before turning to glance at her partner and then at Mistress Sabin. When she turned back to him, her dark eyes held a deep sadness he’d never expected to see, and it threw him off balance.
She studied him for a few beats more before she seemed to make a decision. “The journey tomorrow will be challenging for him.” She said the words as if each one hurt her to admit. “We will not speak of this again, but if you must know the why of it, I will tell you. He has no love for water. Many years ago, before I met him, he nearly drowned, and the resulting illness cost him dearly. After this morning’s little dip, and with tomorrow looming, he is not entirely himself.”
Ravi blinked at her in surprise and screwed up his face. “Uh. He has a fear of water and he comes to Rassa, the wettest of all the three kingdoms? Are you serious? Good gods, the only place worse for him would be the Southern Isles.”
Her frown returned full force as her eyes narrowed. “Don’t make me regret telling you. He may not be the most pleasant of companions until we are all safely on the other side of the Matna tomorrow, but don’t let that get in the way of doing as you are told, when you are told. Do not argue. Do not question. He has risked much to get you to safety. Remember that. He has crossed the Matna many times, and he will do so again. He will do as he must.”
With that, she spun on her heel and headed back to Mistress Sabin’s side, leaving Ravi to trail pensively behind her. Daks had fallen asleep by the time he got back, still clutching the flask to his chest, and Ravi studied his face in the lamplight. At least some of his strangeness made more sense now.
He saved me.
Despite his own fears, and despite all the trouble Ravi had caused, Daks had saved him.
Why?
From the way Daks had talked, Samebar had plenty of Seers. One more, and an unreliable one at that, couldn’t be worth all this effort. Ravi had purposefully played up the guilt card, and Daks had given his word, but Ravi lived in the real w
orld. He knew how much a man’s word was worth. If it weren’t for him, Shura and Daks could have just hopped on a boat back to Samebar and been somewhere safe by now.
“Why?” he whispered aloud this time.
“What?” Shura asked.
Embarrassed, Ravi mumbled, “Nothing.”
“Go to sleep. We have an early start tomorrow.”
“Good night,” he said as he curled his cloak around himself and turned his back.
“Good night,” Mistress Sabin said, and someone snuffed out the lamp.
All fell silent around them but for the periodic call of an owl, the chirping of insects, and Daks’s light snores. The air was heavy, cool, and damp, reminding Ravi of Daks’s concerns about rain. He curled into an even tighter ball and sent up a prayer to merciful Quanna that the weather would hold until they found shelter on the other side.
Tomorrow, his new life began. He clung to that knowledge as too many other worries, thoughts, and feelings vied for attention in his head.
Chapter Ten
DAKS HAD their gear repacked and secured to Horse well before sunrise. Not that he’d be able to tell the exact moment the sun crested the horizon beyond the heavy clouds that had rolled in, but he’d worked mostly in complete darkness despite his roaring headache and queasy stomach. Whatever was in that flask Vasin’s cousin gave him, it sure packed a punch.
Once he’d dressed in the less conspicuous, though slightly worse for wear, Rassan style clothing again, he roused everyone else. They all groggily agreed not to bother with breakfast. They could find something in the market square if they had time before the first ferry left. And if not, they’d eat at Eben’s comfortable and well-stocked inn on the other side. They were so close, Daks could almost taste Eben’s famous ale and meat pies already, and he licked his lips despite the angry gurgle in his belly.
Tipping his head back, he glared up at the clouds. He absolutely refused to allow whatever bad luck, sick twist of fate, or that Rassan god of mischief Ravi accused him of praying to even one more chance to get in the way.
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