“Nice place. I thought you said you only got the keys today.” She motions around the fully furnished entrance area.
“It came furnished.” I look up at the lighting system, consisting of over fifty spots inside the ceiling. It’s a great feature, giving the hallway a welcoming feeling—a stark contrast to my behavior.
“I see.” She follows my example and studies the little dots while an awkward silence settles between us.
“Is the baby even mine? You have been with a lot of men.”
Her hands clench into fists, and when she turns around, the look on her face is as if I just told her I’d take away her puppy—or at least how I imagine someone must look when being told that. I know the feeling; after all, it happened to me when I was ten and my mom decided she’d all of a sudden become allergic to dogs.
“Have you talked to all of them in person?” Her voice is clipped, and her chest heaves with rapid breaths.
“You and your conquests are all over the internet.” Why do I get the feeling I’m the one at fault?
A muscle twitches in her cheek. “It must be true if you can read it online.”
She grabs her coat and puts one arm inside, but before she can put the second one in, I take the coat away, hanging it up myself this time.
“Look me in the eye and tell me the baby is mine.” I tower over her.
Her big brown eyes open even wider, and she’s chewing on her bottom lip but remains silent.
“If you tell me again, I’ll believe you.” I hope I’m not making the biggest mistake of my life right now.
She exhales and looks me straight into the eyes. “The baby is yours. I’m certain.”
Holy shit, I’m going to be a father.
If she wants the baby.
“Are you going to keep it?”
“It’s not an it.” Her eyes flare, and her voice sounds high-pitched. “And abortion is not an option.” She looks ready to face an army and destroy them without so much as lifting her little finger.
“Okay.” I raise my hands in defeat. “I don’t want you to have an abortion. Do you have an ultrasound picture of the baby?”
She shakes her head. “I haven’t been to the doctor yet, but I took six tests—all were positive. I’ve just made my first doctor’s appointment.”
“In Boston?”
She nods. “With the team and everything, I plan to have the baby here.”
Interesting, it confirms the long-term commitment of the Ravelli Group with the team or at least for this season.
“Can I come?” The words leave my mouth before I comprehend their meaning.
“You’re in training camp.” She lowers her eyes.
“Oh.” I might have a milder version of the my-puppy-is-being-taken-away look on my face.
“It’s not that I don’t want you there, but I figured with the team gone, it’ll be easier to go to the doctor unseen. I don’t want anyone to find out at this point, and I wasn’t even sure if you wanted to be involved. If you want, you can come to the next appointment. I don’t want to shut you out.”
I nod. It makes sense. Why do I feel so disappointed then? “Are we telling the team?”
She shakes her head. “Not yet. Like I said, I don’t want to tell anyone at this point. A lot can happen in the first twelve weeks. I haven’t told my grandfather either.”
I nod. “But we’ll tell them eventually?” Not that it’ll be an easy task, but there’s no way around it, is there?
She sighs. “Well, we’ll have to. I won’t be able to hide the pregnancy forever. Maybe we can try to get to know each other first? Spend time together, you know? I—”
“I don’t want a relationship.”
“Oh.” It’s her turn with the puppy look again. “I see. I guess we’ll see each other around then. I’ll text you about the next appointments.” She grabs her coat, and this time, I let her, watching as she flees my apartment.
When the door shuts, I lean against it and close my eyes, only realizing then that I never asked her inside or offered her something to drink. If only ignoring her big brown eyes were as easy as keeping her out of my living room and forgetting all my manners.
“Good morning.” Tyler opens the driver side window.
“Nice ride.” When I told him I hadn’t yet rented a moving truck, he offered to organize everything, and my bad conscience took on gigantic proportions. He’s been trying so hard to bond with me and has been nothing but helpful, and I’m ashamed of my behavior. I not only acted like an ass on a personal level, but more importantly, I missed the opportunity to get to know my linemates, learn how they would react in different situations, and bond with them. Hockey lines often play together for several years, and not many trainers dare to interfere once a line has found its flow.
“It’s Lily’s new truck,” he says once I’m in the passenger seat. He barely waits for me to put on my seat belt before driving on. The engine roars with power as we head out of Boston.
“Why does she need a pickup truck?” His girlfriend is rather petite, and I have a hard time imagining her in this huge truck. Damn, I should have paid more attention to the locker room talk, but last season I shut out each and every one, and the last thing I wanted to hear about was happy relationships. I’ve seen Tyler with his girl at team functions. The last time was at a fundraiser where he was all over her on the dance floor, and people were telling them to get a room. One can tell he’s head-over-heels in love with her.
“She’s a horse trainer and works for Ryan Turner. She’ll need this truck to drive to competitions.” His voice distracts me from my good-for-nothing ex.
“Wait, isn’t Turner one of our sponsors?”
“That’s right.” He turns his head to me for a second. Then focuses on the road again.
“That’s how you met?” I don’t want to talk about relationships, but it’s the polite thing to ask.
He chuckles and taps his fingers against the steering wheel. “No, he had no idea we were dating. I practically ran into her on Newbury Street. We got to talking, you know.”
“Do you have any music?” I need to put a stop to this relationship talk. Not that I begrudge him his happiness—Lily seems like a sweet person, and they are a beautiful couple—but with everything that’s going on in my life, I don’t want happy-couple talk rubbed in my face.
“Sure.” He connects his phone to the sound system and starts a best-of playlist, and we drive on accompanied by a wild mixture of rock classics, pop music, musical songs, film music, and current hits. I like Tyler—honestly, I do—but his taste in music, if there even is a taste, is all over the place. Still, I prefer music to having to talk. I’ll save that for the three-hour drive back when the unpleasant task ahead of us is over.
“Turn to the right. Stop. Here we are.” I look at the big building I once thought to be my dream home. How things can change. It’s strange being here. The house doesn’t look or feel like home anymore.
“You okay?” Tyler places a hand on my arm. I must have been staring at the house for quite some time.
I turn to him. “Yeah. Listen, I’m not sure if Jackie or Jason are at home, but if they are, things could get ugly.”
“Who’s Jason?”
Here we go. Apart from my ex, my brother, and my father, no one knows what happened. The guests weren’t given a reason why we canceled the wedding. But since Jackie blamed me for the break-up, telling everyone who wanted to hear it some bullshit story about me getting cold feet, most of our friends took her side. I should be thankful. I’m better off without those so-called friends.
Tyler’s watching my every reaction, but he deserves the truth for being here with me and supporting me. “My brother.”
“Why is he living with your ex in your house?” Well, if he puts it like that….
“She’s his girlfriend now.” That’s according to the information I get from my father from time to time. Jason and I aren’t exactly on speaking terms anymore.
Tyler
whistles. “Are you going to throw them out?”
I nod. “That’s the plan. It’s my house, bought with my hard-earned money. My father won’t approve of me throwing them out, but I don’t care. Jason and I stopped being close when my mom left us for another man when I was seventeen. He defended her. I blamed her for her behavior. And after finding him with Jackie… I don’t owe him anything anymore. I couldn’t care less if he never talked to me again. Ready for some family drama?”
“Let’s go.” He holds my gaze for a second, and I nod.
We climb out of the truck and take the stairs. My hands shake when I try to open the door. What if they’ve changed the lock? I don’t want to call the police. The last thing I need is this story going viral on the internet.
“Let me.” Tyler takes the key and opens the door without problems.
I pull in my abs and lift my head while walking inside the place I once called home.
“Matty, what a nice surprise. Have you finally decided to join us?” Jackie emerges from the bathroom, clad only in a white lace negligee when Tyler closes the door behind us. She throws her arms around my neck and hugs me tight.
Is she serious?
I push her away, sickened by the way she smells of alcohol and sex. Seeing her now, I don’t know how I ever could have been attracted to her. Granted, she looks a lot better when she isn’t drunk at eleven in the morning and without the puffed-up face and red-rimmed eyes.
“Go away. I’m here to get my things.” I brush past her.
“Hello, handsome, wanna play with me?”
I turn around and watch in horror as she tries to rub herself on Tyler, but he pushes her away as well.
“Not interested. Leave us be.” The horror on his face is blatant when our gazes meet. I jump up the stairs, ignoring the woman I once thought to be the endgame for me, and head straight for my office.
“Your taste in women is questionable.” He closes the door and leans against the wooden frame, placing the folded boxes on the floor.
If he only knew. “She’s not in the same league as your Lily.”
He shakes his head like he wants to shake off what he witnessed downstairs.
I don’t know why I feel the need to explain her behavior, but I do. “My brother’s influence seems to have rubbed off on her. She once was a good girl and didn’t drink while I was with her. It’s not becoming either; she used to look a lot better. Less slutty. Can you make sure no one comes inside?”
I don’t wait for his answer but turn around and take down a picture from the wall to open the safe behind it. Thankfully, everything in the office looks the same as when I left, and I’m fairly certain that neither Jackie nor Jason have bothered coming inside. I never gave Jackie the combination to the safe, which in hindsight was my best decision ever when it came to her.
I punch in the code, and the safe opens with a plop. Not that I have huge amounts of money in there, but there are items of personal value. My nanna’s engagement ring—the one Jackie didn’t want because it wasn’t flashy enough—documents, and my Rolex bought from my very first NHL paycheck.
“Matty! Open the door, little brother.” Jason’s voice is slurred as he shouts and bangs against the door, and when that doesn’t help him achieve his goal, he rattles the doorknob. But Tyler’s big frame prevents him from entering.
“Go away!” I walk over to Tyler to retrieve one of the boxes, taking in his rather amused look while he shifts his weight a tad more against the door. The guy is two hundred pounds of solid muscle, and my brother in his inebriated state is no match for his strength.
I shut the sounds out and put item after item into the box, while Jason continues to bang against the door. Closing the lid, I put the box on the floor and retrieve the next. Old jerseys and my medals from youth tournaments make their way inside. Two boxes later, the sound system and some folders are safely tucked away. I tilt my head to one side, mentally going through all the things that matter to me. There aren’t many. I didn’t spend a lot of money on myself during the past years. Everything I want to take with me is in this room—my former sanctuary. I couldn’t care less what they do with the rest of the stuff.
The banging noise interferes with my thoughts again. This time, I’m unable to ignore it. “Stop it, Jason, or I call the police,” I finally holler through the door. I don’t want to call them, but I’ve lost all patience when it comes to my brother, and I’ve run away from facing him long enough. I didn’t want to disappoint my dad. He went through so much when Mom left us and tried desperately to hold the family together. It’s still his main goal. But that doesn’t mean I have to put up with Jason’s bullshit. He took it too far when he slept with my fiancée. Way too far. Dad begged me more than once to forgive Jason and blamed Jackie for everything. But I can’t. And I don’t want to. Not anymore. I tried to help Jason more than once. Paid for his rehab. Twice. Talked to him for hours. He relapsed each time. The sad truth is, I’ve given up on my brother.
“Hey, you okay?” Tyler puts his hand on my shoulder.
“Yeah.” The banging noise has stopped. At the mention of the cops, my brother must have ceased the nonsense. “I have everything I came for. If you haven’t guessed it already, my brother is an addict. He’s unpredictable. Be careful. Ready?” I close the lid on the last box.
He nods and takes the thing out of my hands, still leaning against the door. Then he takes a step to the side, and my good-for-nothing brother falls into the room. His eyes are red-rimmed, and the stench of alcohol is even worse on him than on Jackie.
“Maaattyy.” He tries to stand up but only manages to crawl on all fours, so I lift him and push him into the office chair.
“Listen carefully. You have one week to leave this house. I want you out of here. You can take whatever’s left in here, but you need to leave. Do you understand?” I pull on his collar.
“Don’t be a party pooper.” He tries to pat my hand, but I pull it away.
“Shut the fuck up. One week, Jason. If you and Jackie are not out by then, I’ll make sure the cops take care of you and your little business.” My hands are trembling, my voice is raised, and I’m tempted to punch him in the face, but he isn’t worth the risk of an injury. I’m looking at a stranger right now.
He lunges for me, but Tyler is quicker and pulls him back by his hoodie, just to let him drop like a hot potato on the floor again. While he tries to stand up, hindered by his pants, I leave the room with Tyler on my heels.
The moment we walk through the door, Jackie throws herself at me, but I shake her off like a fly. God, how could I have ever been attracted to her?
“Don’t be heartless, Matty. We have nowhere to go. You know, now that you’re here… I wanted to ask you.... We need money. You know, I lost my job.”
I wonder why. And no, I didn’t know that. It isn’t surprising; no one wants a drunk hairdresser. Nothing wrong with being a hairdresser, but she never was a particularly good one anyway. She didn’t have to be, as I financed her shopping escapades and beauty treatments. And here I thought paying for her stuff would keep her loyal.
I’m not a violent person. I never have, nor will I ever, hit a woman, but she’d tempt a saint. Yet I exhale before turning to her. “One week, Jackie. If you aren’t gone by then, expect the police to show up here.” I take in her tangled hair and smeared lipstick, suddenly feeling sorry for her, but she has no business being here anymore.
Tyler pushes me outside the house and opens the passenger door for me. Securing the boxes, he still keeps an eye toward the house, but neither Jackie nor Jason follow us outside.
Bile rises in my throat, and we only make it around two corners before I have to tell Tyler to pull over again. The truck hasn’t come to a full stop before I jump out and lose the contents of my stomach on a small strip of green, earning me a disapproving glance from a lady walking her dog.
“Here. Rinse your mouth.” Tyler holds a bottle of water underneath my nose, and I take it out of his hands and do
as told. Spitting out the water, I rid myself of the vile taste and return to the truck where I lean against the door and take deep breaths to calm my stomach.
“Better?” Tyler has a deep frown on his face.
I nod, not trusting myself to speak just yet. He pulls a small bar out of his hoodie and opens it in front of me. “It’s chocolate. Try just one piece. You’re as pale as a ghost. The sugar will help.”
I tried to follow a no-treats—or as I secretly call it, no-fun—diet over the last year, and this little piece of chocolate tastes like sin.
“Is chocolate your guilty pleasure?” I help myself to another piece and marvel as another explosion of sugary sweetness and the bitter aroma of cocoa hits my taste buds.
He laughs. “No, Lily is a chocolate addict; she practically lives off the stuff. These bars are one of her favorites. I learned to always have one with me—just in case.”
“She has great taste, but it’s not very filling. Do you want to grab lunch?”
“Can you keep it down?” He raises an eyebrow.
“Yeah. The poison is out. I know just the place. You like Mexican food?” Since I’ve already had chocolate, I might as well turn today into a full cheat day.
“Sure. Let’s go.” He pats me on the shoulder, and we silently climb back into the truck.
I don’t look back when we drive off. I lost my brother a long time ago to drugs and alcohol, and whatever feelings I may have had for Jackie are long gone. While their betrayal still stings, I’ve learned a valuable lesson. True friends stick around and support you. No matter what. Even if you push them away, they’ll stand by your side in times of need.
I’ve gained such a friend today. And I sure as hell will need a friend at my side facing my unpredictable future with Emilia and becoming a father. But first, it’s time to create new memories, and that’s exactly what we do—with massive amounts of tacos and fajitas, lots of laughter, and the silent understanding to rock this season, no matter what.
Chapter 7
Center of Gravity: An Accidental Pregnancy Romance (An Ice Tigers Hockey Romance Book 2) Page 7