Andy turned her head toward Thunder when he tossed his head side to side before settling. Whiskey rose to check on him.
“So, where was I? Oh, yes, gods pissed. Anyway, since they couldn’t stop the sisters, they run interference. Now, when they look down upon us mortals and see a pair of fated lovers with a connection as strong as the genesis couple of the sisters’ meddling, they step in. Fuck with the pairing to stick it to the sisters. Take something away or cause massive chaos and interference. So, I guess I wondered if you’d lost something? Something that changed the trajectory of your future?”
Andy was a skeptic and non-believer of most things she couldn’t see, hear, taste, or touch, but she had goose bumps so bad she shivered. Whiskey must’ve noticed her rubbing her arms because he grabbed a blanket and pillow from the cabinet. Once he had her settled and cozy, he reclined the chair back for her.
“I didn’t mean to freak you out. I have that effect on people when I talk about my grandmother. I’ll tell you a secret, her shit freaks me out too, but they’re just stories to pass the time. You looked like you could use a distraction. Anyway, he will wake up soon. Please, push that button over there. It’s a direct intercom to my room. I’ll come and walk him back to his room. His legs might be a bit wobbly, and he’s a big fucker. Get some sleep yourself, alright?”
She nodded.
“Good. ‘Night, sister.”
Whiskey dropped a kiss on her forehead and gave her shoulder a firm squeeze before he walked out of the room.
As much as she wanted to sleep, Whiskey’s story kept her awake. Again, she was not someone who bought into that kind of bullshit, but damn if his abuela’s tale didn’t hit close to home. She had lost something. Something huge.
She studied Thunder in his drug-induced sleep. It was déjà vu all over again. Instead of staring at him like a creep or sleeping like any sane person would’ve, she texted Lexi.
ANDY: Please, take good care of Fern, she’s probably lonely without me.
LEXI: Of course, hooker. How’s Thunder?
ANDY: Good, Whiskey patched him up. But holy shit, did you know they have basically a hospital down here? Like full-on everything.
LEXI: Yeah. Whiskey bought the equipment on the black market and gets the drugs and shit from Mexico and Canada. They can do everything from bullet holes to deliver babies. LOL
ANDY: I thought you weren’t supposed to tell tales out of school about the club? Isn’t that TMI?
The distraction was exactly what she needed.
LEXI: 1. You’re down there already and you have eyes. B. It’s different now.
ANDY: You know it drives me crazy when you do that. I want to punch you in the left tit.
LEXI: A. Nooooo, not my party tit. You skank.
LEXI: 2. You love me, endlessly and deeply. Even if I 1-B.
LEXI: Furthermore, you’re not in your head obsessing about Thunder. Probably watching him sleep wondering when you can get the D again, you pervy wervy. Your welcome.
ANDY: *you’re
LEXI: *a cunt, yes
ANDY: smooches-love you stupid-your the best
LEXI: *you’re
ANDY: *a pain in my ass, yes
LEXI: Tell Thunder about your noggin at first chance.
ANDY: I will. Kiss Fern for me.
LEXI: Already done. ‘Night OL
ANDY: OL?
LEXI: Old Lady. Ask Thunder???
ANDY: OK ‘Night
She could always count on Lexi. She was her Ride or Die, so why was she deflecting and deferring? Lexi was brutally honest. To the point that people without thick skin didn’t last long around her.
Why was the old lady phrase a thing all of the sudden? It wasn’t the first time Lexi had said it. Not to mention the strange way others were reacting to her.
She watched a documentary once on outlaw bikers, and they used the term to mean wife. Lexi had always maintained that the Phantoms were different, nothing like that at all. So maybe the Phantoms used the term differently, and it had something to do with her being involved in the shooting. That made sense because no one said it or treated her weird before.
Maybe it was honorary because she helped them. She liked that thought. Being an honorary badass, like Ripley. She was as badass as they came.
Andy drifted off to the thought of wearing a leather jacket, getting a badass road name, and riding one of those custom bikes. Some women dreamed of fairy tales, flowing gowns, and a future being the perfect wife. While some dreamed of bikes, beards, and being badass. Both were fine, but not one size fits all.
The wind was whipping her hair around her shoulders. In her dream, she didn’t have to follow any helmet laws. She laughed into the night, but the wind carried the sound. As good as it felt, she pushed her mind, and poof, she was wrapped around Thunder while they flew down the asphalt like a rocket. This time the wind ate his laughter, but she felt what she couldn’t hear.
Badass or not, even in her dreams, Andy would rather be on the back of Thunder’s bike than on one of her own. She felt herself being called from sleep too soon.
Nooooooo. She didn’t want to wake up.
“Heisman, no. Hold, damn it.”
Andy was clawing her way to the surface. She recognized the name. It was Thunder, he was having a nightmare. Her eyes finally obeyed. She blinked to clear them and threw off the blanket.
“Goddamn it, man, why didn’t you listen?” It wasn’t exactly the same as before, this was different.
After she grabbed his hand, she soothed his brow. “Thunder, it’s me. Wake up. You’re having a bad dream.” Andy felt helpless when he continued to babble and flail about. It seemed so disjointed. “Babe? Come on, open your eyes.” She switched sides so she could hold his left arm still, so he didn’t tear his stitches. Andy continued to brush his forehead and hair back with her other hand. It seemed a soothing thing to do.
The anguish had finally gone from his voice, and his face relaxed. A small smile turned his lips up ever so slightly and it warmed her heart. She’d done that. Calmed him. Helped him through a storm. Andy had often questioned her ability to be soft and emotional, feminine. Thunder’s smile and eased posture proved otherwise. She was falling—had fallen—hard for that man. A man she knew little about, but it didn’t matter.
When it was right, it was right. She hoped her brain injury wouldn’t matter to him. For the first time in three years, she felt it didn’t matter, period. That was something he gave her. His presence gave her confidence in that. Maybe Whiskey’s tale had something to do with her new attitude or Lexi pushing her.
Either way, she would not toss it all away. Like the saying goes, never look a gift horse in the mouth. It wasn’t a metaphorical mouth that crushed her heart, but a very real one. One that brought pleasure, but also pain.
“Melissa? It’s you.”
The relief in his velvet voice broke her heart. Maybe she could’ve handled him calling to another woman if she hadn’t just pulled her own heart out to examine it. She was too raw. Just when she thought it couldn’t get worse, it did.
“So glad,” he breathed. “Missed you.”
Andy found that place once again. Locked her feelings behind the wall. No way was she going to abandon Thunder, but she wouldn’t be starting a relationship with another inaccessible man. Even if he thought he was ready, it was glaringly obvious he was fooling himself.
19
Thunder
The hot water pounding down his back felt like heaven. He double-checked the watertight bandage before tilting his head back and letting the water soothe him.
Tension zinged through his mind, body, and soul. Not because of the shooting or having to tell Andy about claiming her. It was his fucked-up dreams. That was the primary reason he never took pain meds. They messed with his memories.
The moment Heisman took the bullet meant for him was as vivid as when it’d happened. He heard the pop, felt the blood pouring through his fingers while he tried to staunch the flo
w. He admonished his friend for not listening.
When he turned to see if they were still in danger, like he always did, his memory had shifted. Instead of seeing Tiny take out who he assumed was the shooter, he watched as he lowered his smoking gun and smirked. His voice was surreal when he proclaimed, “It should’ve been you.”
He’d tried to pull himself from the nightmare. He felt more than heard Andy calling him back, but instead of reaching for her, another feminine hand reached out to him.
Then he was lying in his bed at his old house, questioning everything. Nothing made sense except the one thing that did, Melissa. He just gotten home from losing Heisman, and she was there, the perfect loving partner. How he had missed her then.
“That was the biggest lie of all.” He scoffed to the empty bathroom. That was a time which had only played back in his mind once before last night. Thunder tried to understand why. The only time he gave it any thought was when he had finally figured out their game. So why last night?
No matter how he dissected it, he couldn’t hit on a reason for it. All his thoughts and dreams of Melissa were not flattering to say the least, so why?
He was grateful Andy hadn’t been there when he woke up. He couldn’t imagine…. His hands stilled in his hair as suds ran down his face. Andy. The reason he was remembering the one moment he needed Melissa more than anything, she’d been there. Not for him, but for her later deception. He exposed his throat, and she’d dragged the knife across it.
Vulnerability. He was at the most vulnerable he’d ever been… until last night.
Andy. He was letting down his walls and that scared the holy shit out of him. He finished up his shower and toweled off.
Thunder looked at himself in the mirror. Nothing was the same. Him, the woman, the way it felt, nothing. Needing to acknowledge that on a different level felt imperative. “She’s not Melissa, and she’s never going to be.”
It felt freeing and terrifying at the same time. Freeing because he accepted his words as fact. He wouldn’t make Andy pay for something someone else did. Something he had no reason to believe she would ever do to him.
Terrifying because he heard her in his room. The clink of dishes being placed on the table. If she’d heard him before they talked, it might taint everything.
“Hey, Thunder. You still in the shower. You okay?”
Whew, she hadn’t heard him if she thought he was still in the shower.
“I’m good, babe, just getting dried off.” He pulled on a pair of sweats and stepped into his room where the smell of burgers and fries hit him causing his stomach to growl.
The smile she gifted him punched him right in the chest. It concerned him when he noticed it didn’t reach her beautiful eyes.
Maybe she was still exhausted. Whiskey said she’d stayed with him the whole time and only left to eat.
“Sit, eat. You need to build up your strength.”
He looked down at a veggie burger decked out just the way he liked it, a mound of fries, and a gallon of ketchup. His favorite.
“How did you know?” He popped a fry in his mouth.
“I asked the girls, and they said it was your favorite, extra lettuce, no tomatoes, and a tanker truck full of ketchup.” She could’ve made him anything to eat, but she took the time to ask the girls what he liked and made that. It bode well for their future. She cared about him and she was not faking it.
“You’re not hungry?”
She smiled and stole a fry, then sat on the bed to put on her shoes.
“I ate when I made yours. Besides, I had a last-minute client book. Shop’s closed, but I need to keep the clients happy, so…” She stood, walked over and kissed him on the forehead. It felt a lot like goodbye. Not the physical kind, but the emotional one. There was a distance that hadn’t been there before.
Maybe he was reading into it because he had so many things he needed to share with her so they could move forward. Thunder wrapped his arms around her thighs and looked up at her. Hoping she couldn’t tell his arm hurt like a bitch holding her, he asked, “You coming back here after? We have some shit we need to iron out, but I want you by my side tonight, and when I wake up in the morning.”
When he leaned his cheek into her belly, he breathed a sigh of relief as her hands fell to his hair. “We do need to talk, but I need to check on Fern and you need a proper night of sleep. How about I bring you donuts in the morning? Taps told me there is an amazing vegan bakery that I have to try.”
The groan that escaped him wasn’t just because imagining Taps eating donuts in front of Andy didn’t sit well with him.
“You sure you don’t wanna stay here and we can make the donut run together?”
“I’m going to be late and you need to rest and recover. We’ll talk tomorrow, I promise. Right now, though, I have to jet.” She dropped a kiss on the top of his head. Lingering her lips there before she turned away.
“You have my number programmed into your phone?”
Andy swiped the screen and turned it his way. “Yep, along with Granite’s.” Swipe. “Pound’s.” Swipe. “Whiskey’s, and pretty much every Phantom there ever was.” She smiled and pocketed her phone.
Thunder watched her walk out of his room and pushed the plate away. Something was off and it spoiled his appetite. As his mind reeled, he pulled a tee over his head and stalked down the hall.
Granite and Pound sat at the bar, while Whiskey and Taps shot pool. “Hey, look who is among the living.” Pound saluted him with an amber bottle.
“That looks good, how about it, Trixie?” She turned to Whiskey for approval. Being a “patient” sucked.
“Go on, not like your stubborn ass would listen to me, anyway.”
Thunder downed a good portion of the bottle right off the bat. “Did Andy seem. . .off when she left?” He heard the pool stick softly thud against the surface. He knew what that meant even before Taps opened his mouth.
“Well, well, well, seems the big bad pilot who complained anytime a feeling come anywhere near him, wants to discuss what else, but feelings.”
Taps hopped up on the empty barstool, placed his elbows on the bar, and dropped his chin onto his fist like a schoolgirl. To top it off, he swung his feet back and forth.
“I have been waiting for this day since you patched in.”
Thunder rolled his eyes hard. Turning his back to Taps, he asked the rest of his brothers. “Anyone, and I do mean, anyone else want to help me out here? I cannot talk to a grown-ass man who tongue fucks donuts and pops wood at the thought of gabbing like a girl.”
Not that he didn’t value Taps’ assessment. Hell, it would actually be pretty accurate… if the fucker could be serious for five minutes. But his, The More I Drink The Better I Dance shirt didn’t instill confidence. If the words didn’t do it, the chipmunk wearing a button-down shirt and gold chains giving finger guns would.
“Did you tell her yet?” That was Granite’s contribution.
“Didn’t get a chance. She had a client and bolted before I was even dry from my shower.”
“For what it’s worth,” Whiskey added. “I don’t think the prospect of being your old lady will freak her out as much as you’re worried it will. We had a lot of time to talk while you slept.” Whiskey must’ve seen the murder in his stare, because he raised his hands in surrender. “Calm down, brother. I didn’t out you. Not my place, but I think she cares deeply for you. Can’t imagine why, but she looks at you the way Taps looks at dessert.”
“Aw hell, when’s the wedding then, because I would fucking marry me some dessert.”
“Can it.” Pound slapped Taps on the shoulder. “My question is, do you look at her like that?”
“Yes,” Thunder answered with no hesitation, no thought because it was just what it was. It shocked the hell out of him it was so simple to blurt it out.
“Well.” Trip strode over to them. Thunder had failed to notice him on the couch with Tammy. “Then maybe you’re looking for trouble where there isn�
��t any. Sabotaging shit before it even gets started. Not like you don’t have a perfect track record of doing just that.”
All his brothers agreed emphatically.
Granite handed him another bottle. “So, stop borrowing trouble. Wait until the first time you forget an anniversary or a birthday. Then you can worry.”
They shared a few drinks in companionable silence. When Granite stood to leave, he turned back to the men gathered around. “Church at ten. We have a plan to nail down.” With that, he disappeared through the front.
After the sound of his pipes faded, the conversation resumed. “So, did you get all the weak spots on lock?” Thunder knew that his brothers followed orders, but he was making conversation.
“Of course, Caleb and his mom are settled in already and Lexi will be along after Tails closes. What about Andy, when is she coming back? Ripley got eyes on her at work?” Whiskey asked.
“Shit!” Thunder swore. “The drugs had me fuzzy when I woke up and then the fucking ghosts of the past, and shit, she was so beautiful standing there.”
Thunder hated himself. All he did was fail Andy. The only thing he’d done right so far was fuck her senseless in the locker room three years ago.
“Granite took care of it before Andy left. You’ve had our backs more times than we can count, we got yours this time. As soon as she said she wasn’t returning tonight, Granite sent Davis to her place. Lexi said they’d stay there tonight and be here before breakfast.”
Thunder breathed a sigh of relief. The Phantoms were family. “What about while she’s at Horns?”
“Said the shop was closed, and the client was a friend. Seemed fine to us, but Granite still asked Ripley to do a drive-by just to check in on her. It’s all good. Relax and enjoy your last night as a free man, so to speak.”
“Hear, hear!”
20
Andrea
It felt like her life was a series of things she didn’t want. More so in the last few days than ever before. She certainly didn’t want Thunder to get shot or call out to a woman he wanted for comfort when he woke up, who wasn’t her. She damn sure hadn’t wanted to hear him comparing them in his head.
Thunder (Desert Phantoms MC Book 1) Page 13