by Abigail Kade
“She borrowed money herself from some people, too, so they were both running on borrowed time. They were both found shot in the head point blank and left in the alley where they fell. There were no witnesses, or none that would come forward. I told them all about the cop who had come into our apartment and roughed us up, but nothing ever came of it because we had no proof and didn’t have a name. Neither my mom nor the guy had any ID on them, so if Mr. Parson’s hadn’t gone looking, she might have been buried as a Jane Doe and we would never have known what happened to her. I guess even now it doesn’t really matter. She threw us away and left us to fend for ourselves. We were so goddamn lucky to have family who was looking for us.”
Connor put his hand under my chin and lifted my head up until I could look him in the eye. I was shocked to find he had been crying, his cheeks wet and his eyes glassy. I reached up and cradled his scruffy jaw with my smaller hand, gently wiping the tear tracks with my thumb. “Don’t cry for me, Conn, I’m fine now, I promise. I’ve had a good life even if parts were hard.”
Connor turned his strong jaw and rubbed against my hand, then turned even further placing a kiss on my palm. “I’m not crying for who you are now. I’m crying for eight-year-old Ladd who offered to clean dishes and tables so his brothers could eat even if he didn’t get anything in return. God, Ladd, if I ever had any reservations about the kind of man you are.” He shook his head and then leaned into me placing his forehead against mine. “That story, Ladd, it wrecked me while you were telling it. How could a mother do that to her kids? All I could imagine was your sweet face having to beg for your brothers and thinking you weren’t worthy of anything but scraps. I just want to wrap you up and hold you close until all the ugliness in the world can’t touch you ever again. You’re probably one of the best, most genuine men I’ve ever met, and I’m so fucking honored that you would even consider being with me.”
Connor didn’t know it, but this was the moment I fell in love with him. I felt a lightness in my throat and a heaviness in my chest all at once. I had never felt emotions with actual weight to them, but I felt the importance of this single moment in time. I didn’t have the words to express my feelings. The moment was so raw, so I kissed him. It wasn’t sexy or passionate or lust-inducing. This was a kiss of promises made and promises accepted. It only lasted a few minutes, then by unspoken agreement, we snuggled back together and kept watching the flames dance in the cool night air.
Eventually, the day finally caught up to me, and I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew, Connor was carrying me to my bedroom and settling me under the covers after removing my socks, belt, and bowtie. I woke up for a second when I felt Penny curl up in her usual spot by my legs and heard Connor curse, “Jesus Christ, that’s the biggest cat I’ve ever seen!” I opened my eyes and let out a tired giggle, and he leaned over and gave me a sweet peck on the lips. “Sleep tight, Ladd, this was the most fantastic first date in the history of first dates. I’ll see you in the morning.” And with that, he was gone, and he took a piece of my heart with him.
Chapter Ten
If there was anything that could go wrong, it had gone wrong this morning. Jesus Christ, the only thing I was looking forward to today was getting to see Ladd. The city inspector had shown up at the ass crack of dawn this morning a day early and with a chip on his shoulder the size of Stone Mountain. The young guy had immediately gone around noting every possible problem and violation like it was his mission in life to make this project a disaster. He’d even found what he thought was black mold in one of the bathrooms upstairs and was now squawking at me saying I would have to empty out the building until air quality tests were conducted. So not only were Ladd and I going to have to go over every one of these things the inspector had found line by line, now I was going to have to find a new place to stay for a little while until I could get everything settled. Just fucking great!
As I was ushering the inspector’s ass out of my building, Ladd was making his way up the sidewalk. He gave the guy a wave and greeted him by name. “Hey, Jeff. What are you doing here today? I thought Tony was scheduled to come by tomorrow?” Jeff, the fucker, ignored Ladd and practically jogged toward his city vehicle and lit out as quickly as he could. Ladd gave me a weird look, “That’s weird, he’s never been like that before. What time did he get here? He must not have been here long, right about now is their usual start time.” He looked at his phone and noted the early hour.
“Actually, he got here about six this morning. I had no notice, and he just came right on in and started marking things every-fucking-where. He even said there was black mold in one of the bathrooms and we needed to get it tested as soon as possible and no one could live in the building until the air quality tests were done. So now I have to schedule all of these fucking repairs and find a place to stay while it’s being done!” I knew I was losing my cool, but I couldn’t help it. I ran my hands through my hair, then clasped my fingers at the back of my head and let out a frustrated breath.
I felt a light touch on my arm and looked down to see Ladd had grabbed my arm and was trying to pry it away from my head with a small smile playing on his lips. “You’re awfully cute when you get flustered, Conn, but you need to lay off your hair. I like all of those floofy curls you have going on, and I don’t want you pulling them out for nothing.” He tugged again, and I let my arms fall heavily to my sides with a slap.
“Okay, so what do you think I should do?” I couldn’t stay away from him a second longer, so I moved into his space and grabbed him by the hips, trailing small kisses along his hairline and down his jaw. “What do you have planned for me and my problem, Ladd? Can you help me solve this clusterfuck of a situation?” I knew I was flustering him because he was fluttering his hands around my waist trying to decide if he wanted to move back or forward into my embrace. I took pity on him and stopped my kisses, then stepped back just a smidgen to give him room to breathe. That seemed to do the trick, and he visibly got himself together before answering.
“Well, first thing, obviously you’ll move into the carriage house. There’s plenty of space, and the guest room never gets used, so it’s all yours. Second, I’ll call the air quality guys I’ve used before and get them to come over today if possible and give us some information to get the mold situation started. Then, you and I will go over the rest of the things on the list line by line and take care of them. It’s no big deal really, just a little weird that they came a day early. But we’ll take care of it and get everything back on track. We’ve been a little ahead of schedule up until now anyway, so it shouldn’t affect the finish date much. The kitchen’s practically done except for the fixtures on order, and the guys have really been pushing to get the flooring and plaster work finished in the bar and pub area so we can have the bar installed. It’s really starting to come together, Connor.” Ladd gave me a little squeeze around the middle, then stepped back, “Everything will be fine, you’ll see.”
I couldn’t believe how much his little pep talk had helped me calm down. Ladd could make me feel better just by being next to me it seemed. It was a great feeling to have your very own pep squad. I was about to tell him that and then offer to show him all the ways I could show my appreciation when a distinct text notification dinged for the fourth time this morning. My good mood was now shit once again.
“Fucking hell, why the fuck does he keep texting me?” I yelled and stormed away from Ladd to snatch my phone off the workbench nearby. I swiped the screen open and read Troy’s most recent text.
Troy: Hey, Connie, quit ignoring me! I know you still love and miss me and I miss you, too. I couldn’t stay with John and Trey knowing that I had left you the way I did. I think I still love you, Connie. You know you’ll never find anyone else like me!
I looked at what he’d written and couldn’t believe the emotions it brought up. I had spent months waiting to hear these words from Troy. I had stared at my phone for hours wanting to see his number come up with the words I miss yo
u or I still love you. But they’d never come. And now that the day had finally arrived, I just…didn’t care anymore. I was done. I’d moved on from that life and into something better. I looked up from staring daggers at my screen and caught the eyes of my future. I suddenly realized that Ladd meant more to me right now after a few weeks than Troy ever had. Troy had been and still seemed to be all about himself and his own happiness. I’d bet everything I owned, his new men had dumped him, and he was looking for a soft place to fall with me until he found something better. Last night, Ladd had shared his pain and trusted me to be there for him. Now it was my turn to trust him in return.
I walked over handing my phone to him and explained. “My ex-boyfriend Troy has been texting me off and on since yesterday. He won’t take no for an answer, and it’s really beginning to piss me off.” Ladd just held the phone in his hand limply and gave me a questioning look.
“Go ahead. I don’t want any secrets between us. I’m an open book for you, read them. Tell me what you think.” So Ladd looked down at the screen and read. When he was done, he was frowning a little.
“He mentions two guys, which one did he leave you for?” I winced a little and then stood tall. I wouldn’t hide away from my past anymore. I took a second and turned away to look out the window, hands running through my hair and resting on the back of my neck. If I was going to try to be enough for Ladd, then I was going to have to show him everything I was. I wouldn’t start this by hiding or pretending. We weren’t those people, and I wanted to show him everything, even my embarrassment and humiliation.
“If it’s too painful, I understand, but last night you told me you didn’t want just my happy, but my sad and painful, too. It goes both ways. I can’t make your hurt go away if you don’t share it with me, Conn.” Ladd gave me his smiling eyes, then walked over to me and put a sweet kiss on my cheek embracing me gently. This sweet man held my heart in his hands at that very moment, and I wanted nothing more than to tell him everything. I explained about Troy leaving for two men, how he said I wasn’t enough, and he had been biding his time with me until something better came along. And all throughout, Ladd held me close and never once let me go.
When I was finished with my pitiful as fuck tale, Ladd gave me a little squeeze, then let me go and pulled my phone up. He raised his eyebrow in question, and I smiled and nodded for him to go ahead. He typed for a few seconds and then handed me my phone back with a little smirk.
Looking down, I saw his reply.
Connor: I hope to God I don’t ever find anyone like you, Troy, because once was enough. I don’t ever want anyone like you again!
I threw my phone down, then picked Ladd up in a huge bear hug. He squealed his surprise, then giggled with his head next to my ear. “I take it you liked my response?” I squeezed him tighter, and he grunted so I let him slide back down to his feet.
“I fucking love your response. I’ve been way too nice I guess, so that was perfect. Maybe he’ll get the hint now.”
“You don’t need to be nice to him, Connor. You need to tell him to fuck off after the way he treated you. I kept it simple this time, but if he keeps it up, don’t hold back. And what the hell is up with him calling you Connie? You’re not a teenage girl, you’re all man and he obviously never appreciated it. He’s a real asshole and doesn’t deserve you.” Ladd was on a roll now, face red and breath heaving.
“I love the way you’re pissed for me, Ladd. Not many people besides my family have ever had my back before. Now that I think about it, Troy never had my back either. He always told me to give it a rest if I was upset at something. If it inconvenienced him, then he had no time for it, even if it was me or my problems.” I grabbed Ladd on his slim hips and put our foreheads together. “Fuck, I guess I really did dodge a bullet. And look where I landed, in a beautiful city by the water with the most beautiful man, inside and out, that I’ve ever met. My wish on that fucking star came true after all.” I laughed to myself.
Lachlan is going to eat crow, beak and all next time I see him!
“What star are you talking about?” Ladd pulled back and had a look on his face I couldn’t place.
“Oh, it’s nothing, just a silly thing I like to do. I always make a wish when I see a falling star.” I actually blushed when I realized how completely ridiculous this sounded out loud. “I know it’s silly, but I wished for someone special a few weeks ago, on the night of the last meteor shower. It was my first night in town actually, and I was so lonely. I never imagined it would work though, but here you are.”
Ladd pulled away and put his small hand on my cheek. “You’re a very special guy, Connor.” Then he busted out laughing.
“Shit, now you think I’m an idiot. I should have kept my mouth shut.”
“No…No, you’re not…an idiot.” Tears were flowing down his face he was chuckling so hard. “You’re sweet, really.” I got a big hug, then he turned and walked away toward the bar area still laughing. “If you’re going to get that list tackled today, we need to get to work, Star-Lord.”
“I’m bigger and better looking than him any day!” I yelled at him as he and his tight little ass disappeared into the other room.
Ladd stopped and gave me a quick up and down sweep from over his shoulder, then winked, “No arguments from me, big guy.”
For the rest of the day, Ladd and I worked together to solve the problems pointed out by the inspector. They were mostly nitpicky little things that most inspectors would never even look twice at, but since they were on the report, they had to be addressed for us to move forward. Ladd had been right. We were in a good spot even if we did have to close down for a few days to get the mold situation handled. We worked really well together.
“Connor, which other outlets does it say need new covers? I’ve finished the ones in this room,” Ladd said as he came out of one of the apartments on the second floor. We were almost done with the bullshit list from the inspector, and I just needed to pack and move my stuff over to Ladd’s place. He looked cute and rumpled in his jeans and button-down shirt, sleeves rolled up and bowtie crooked. He hadn’t been planning on doing manual labor this morning when he’d gotten dressed, so seeing his cute dressy clothes mussed just made him all the more sexy in my mind.
“That was the last one. Now, all we have to handle is the mold situation, and we can leave for the night.” I walked over to him and wrapped him in my arms to give him a quick kiss.
“Connor, let me go.” He giggled and tried to get away. “I’m all crumpled and sweaty. You can’t want to kiss me like this.” I squeezed him a little until he raised his head to look into my eyes.
“Ladd, I want to kiss you any way I can get you, and any time I can get to you. Believe me, though, seeing you rumpled and tie askew has got to be one of the sexiest things I’ve seen in years, so be still and let me show you how much I appreciate all you’ve done to help me today.”
Ladd’s eyes glazed over and he licked his lower lip, then swallowed thickly before he replied with a soft, “Okay.”
I leaned down to lay one on him when I heard the front door open, and a few guys make their way in with one yelling, “Yo, Ladd, you here, man?”
Ladd started giggling while I dropped my forehead to rest on his and shook my head at the remediation guy’s crap timing. I gave him a quick peck on the lips, and Ladd yelled down, “Up here, Monty! We’ll be down in a minute.”
I looked over the railing and saw a mountain of a man starting to come up the stairs to the landing. “That’s all right, Ladd. You said the mold was up here, right? I’ve got the other guys looking around in the usual places downstairs, but I’ll check this out up here for you. It’s probably nothing, and you’ll be back up and running in a day or two.”
The guy, Monty, came right up into Ladd’s space and grabbed him in a bear hug, even picking him up and giving him a little shake. I couldn’t contain a little growl under my breath, and the guy let Ladd go and looked me over before raising an eyebrow as a question. �
�And who might this be?”
Ladd walked over to me and put his hand into mine and with a huge smile on his face said, “Monty, this is my boyfriend, Connor McDaniel.” Then looking at me he said, “Connor, this is Monty, Gwen’s younger brother. We’ve been friends for years, so don’t get all broody.” He gave me a mock frown, and I had to laugh. I’d acted a little possessive, but he didn’t seem to mind. I held out a hand to shake with Monty.
“Hi, I’m Connor, nice to meet you. Sorry for my reaction, it’s been a long day.”
Monty gave me a good firm shake and let me off the hook, “I’m Monty, and it’s fine, really. Believe me. I get it. If some strange guy came up and hugged my Ellie girl, I’d want to know who the hell he was, too.” His smile was wide, and I couldn’t help but smile back. His dark blonde hair was cut short, and his bright blue eyes seemed to glow in his darkly tanned face. Monty looked like he could double for the comic book version of Thor. Thank God he was obviously straight, or I really would have been a jealous ass.
With a nod, Monty and Ladd walked back to the bathroom with the mold, and I stayed out on the landing and took the time to admire the plaster work the guys had been working on the last few weeks. The tracery details on the ceiling were gorgeous, and I had insisted it be restored completely. The intricate designs were neoclassical according to Ladd. I didn’t know what time period it harkened back to. I just knew I loved the white plaster swirls and shapes against the now creamy yellow ceiling. This building really was special just as Ladd had told me on that first day we had done our walkthrough. He had spent hours talking with each crew, going over the importance of certain design details and the need to restore them lovingly. The rough construction guys would all listen quietly every time Ladd told them about some aspect of the building he wanted them to be careful around while working. They caught his enthusiasm and always made absolutely certain they followed his recommendations. Ladd really was something special, and I was feeling so lucky that he had just told his friend that I was his boyfriend. We hadn’t talked about labels, had only had one official date, but the name seemed to fall onto my shoulders and fit comfortably. I wanted to be his boyfriend more than anything.