The Rocks Duet: Fake Rocks & Real Rocks (a fake relationship rockstar romance)

by Julie Archer

  Jonas was in the living room when we arrived. In typical Sunday fashion, he was wearing fancy men’s yoga pants and a loose cashmere sweater. He sprawled out on the sofa, the supplements from one of the Sunday broadsheets spread out around him, along with a copy of The Informer.

  “Hey, Jonas. On your own?”

  He glanced up from the newspaper. On occasions, he had someone stay over. I couldn’t remember if he was seeing anyone right now or whether he was ‘between relationships’. Despite the interest he took in my own love life, I had always been reticent to ask about his.

  “I am yes. My…friend left after brunch.” He gave an awkward smile. Maybe he liked this one after all. “I saw some of the coverage of the Roccia event. It makes for good reading, Saff.” He reached for The Informer and opened it up to the appropriate page before handing it to me. On their celebrity pages were a few shots of Tris and I from the previous night, laughing, having fun, kissing. They accompanied them with a few short words about how I seemed very happy with someone who wasn’t a celebrity.

  Even thinking about kissing Tris made me hot again.

  “You don’t have to pretend when you’re at home.” Jonas’ gaze slipped to where Tris and I were holding hands.

  “We’re not pretending. At least, I’m pretty sure we’re not after last night. And this morning.” I grinned, unable to help myself.

  A flush crept up Tris’ neck. There wasn’t any point in keeping it from him, after all he was the reason we were together in the first place.

  “Sorry, what?” Jonas’ brows knotted together as he tried to comprehend what I had said.

  Tris disentangled his hand from mine. “I’m going to nip to the bathroom. Back in a minute.”

  I flung myself down onto the sofa next to Jonas, not caring if I was sitting on tomorrow’s fish and chip wrappers. “You have the best ideas.”

  “I do?”

  “Yeah, Tris is amazing. We had such a good time this weekend, spending time together, getting to know each other and he’s incredible in bed.” A grin spread across my face I didn’t know how to stop. Not that I wanted it to.

  Jonas placed his hands over his ears. “La, la, la, I don’t need to know, thank you.”

  “Mmm, yeah, okay, TMI.”

  “So you’ve had a fantastic weekend with someone and now suddenly you want to settle down?” Jonas started to put the pieces together.

  “Well, I’m not ready for the whole marriage and kids thing, but I have no inclination to head out with Troy Carson or any of the other bad boys in my extensive portfolio.” I was half joking about the choice of guys I could have. My phone was full of numbers. But, actually, after this weekend I honestly wasn’t interested in any of them.

  It seemed strange to think that a week ago, when Jonas had threatened me with ending the recording contract everything had turned on its head.

  TheSB had a new drummer and we were going to be making new music.

  And I had Tris.

  Life was good.

  22

  Tris

  The bathroom off the kitchen provided me with the perfect breathing space. Everything seemed to be happening so quickly. A little over a week ago, I’d arrived at my uncle’s with nothing and now I had a job and, it appeared, a girlfriend.

  Even if it had come about in the strangest of ways.

  I was aware of Saff’s reputation when it came to men.

  Would I end up as another notch on her bedpost when she got bored?

  When she got what she wanted from Jonas in terms of the recording contract would she dump me?

  Was I worrying unnecessarily and should I simply live in the moment and enjoy whatever happened?

  It wasn’t like I didn’t deserve a little bit of happiness.

  I went back into the living room and hovered awkwardly, not quite knowing where to sit or what to do. Saff and Jonas were chatting about something music related I didn’t quite understand.

  My phone pinged with a message. It was Uncle Col asking how the weekend had been and what time I’d be home. Aunt Annie wanted to know whether to cook dinner for me. I was pretty sure Saff wanted me to stay tonight.

  “I’m going to call my uncle,” I said. “Let him know I’ll be here until the morning.”

  Jonas’ gaze flitted between Saff and me, his eyebrows raised.

  “If that’s okay with you, Jonas?” I added hastily.

  “You should know by now Saff does what she pleases and who she asks to stay over is really none of my business.”

  Saff punched him on the arm. “You make it sound as if I have a different guy here every night.”

  “Up until recently you did.”

  I was sure Jonas was joking. Fairly sure, at least. Shaking my head, I headed back to the kitchen.

  Having spent most of the past week there, it was probably the room in the house I felt most at home in. I surveyed the work we’d completed: all the cupboards and units were installed; the oven and hob were operational—not that either Saff or Jonas appeared to have any inclination to cook—and the floor tiles were laid. The last thing we had to do in there was finish up the painting. That job was earmarked for tomorrow. At least I could make a start if Uncle Col had any problems with traffic.

  “Tris! You didn’t need to call. A message would have been fine. You know what your aunt is like when she’s cooking.”

  Given what had happened last night and how I hoped things were going to pan out, I figured a message wouldn’t cut it somehow.

  “I’m not going to be home tonight. I’m going to stay with Saff.”

  “Right, I thought it might be a bit late for you to come back, really. You’d only have got through the door then we’d be coming back again.” Uncle Col chuckled.

  A wave of nervousness overcame me. It shouldn’t be difficult to tell him about Saff and me. But he knew it was meant to be a temporary, not to mention totally fabricated, situation. For him to hear things had moved on pretty rapidly would likely come as a shock.

  “It’s not that,” I began. “Um, I don’t know if you saw any of the pictures from the charity dinner.”

  “Annie did. She found some lovely ones of you in your suit, kept going on about how handsome you looked. Talked about getting them printed and framed.”

  I winced. I could definitely see her doing that.

  “She wasn’t sure about Saff’s outfit though, said it made her look a bit cheap.”

  Great, I’m about to tell him Saff and I might be making a real go of a relationship and my aunt already thinks she’s trashy.

  “Um, do you think you could bring me some clothes when you come tomorrow?”

  “Sure. I guess you haven’t had chance to wash your work stuff from Friday yet.”

  “Yeah, there is that. But I’m probably going to be staying over a few nights this week too.”

  “Oh, right. Got a few appearances to do as part of the relationship contract?”

  There was my out. I could tell him that. Say Saff needed me this week to go to parties, gigs and events with her to keep up her new image. I wouldn’t have to tell him and Aunt Annie anything. At least until I knew what was happening between the two of us for sure. Silently, I thanked him for the excuse.

  “Yeah, that’s right. She’s got things lined up on and off this week so it’s easier for me to stay here.” I breathed a sigh of relief. Right now, it was a better story than the truth, although I was getting way too comfortable with this lying thing.

  “No probs. Do you know what you need?”

  I reeled off a list of things he could bring over. It wasn’t hard, considering I didn’t exactly have much stuff to begin with.

  “Got it. Now, can you speak to your aunt? She’s been dying to know what your dinner was like.”

  There was a pause while he handed the phone over to Aunt Annie. I thought I heard him tell her of my plans for the week and she tutted in response. But I could have imagined it.

  “Tris! You looked so smart in your suit
.”

  She praised me as though I were a teenager going to my first Prom or something. I was pleased she couldn’t see me roll my eyes.

  “Aunt Annie, I’m not eighteen anymore.”

  She sighed. “No. You’re a grown man who can make his own decisions.”

  “I sense a but?”

  “Are you sure about this fake relationship thing? Couldn’t you find a nice girl and take her out to the pub instead?”

  I wanted to remind her Uncle Col was benefitting from this arrangement as well, but now probably wasn’t the right time.

  “Saff is a nice girl.”

  Aunt Annie sniffed. “Seeing the pictures of her the other night doesn’t make me think that. Why does she need to wear a collar? She’s not a dog.”

  “It’s the image she’s created. Underneath the facade, she’s really not what you think.”

  I had a flashback to Saff in her black satin underwear and fishnets. It certainly wasn’t appropriate for those images to be floating through my head while I was on the phone to my aunt and I quickly tried to banish them.

  “Hmm.” Even over the phone, I could sense Aunt Annie’s disapproval. “Tell me more about the dinner instead,” she said, changing the subject.

  Moving the conversation on was safer. I regaled her with stories from the evening, who we’d met, what we’d eaten and what we’d bid on. We hadn’t come away with any of the auction items, despite Saff’s over the top bids. She assured me Jonas would be happy to pay if she had won.

  “Ah, it sounds like such a lovely evening,” sighed Aunt Annie when I’d finished.

  “It was.” Although I couldn’t deny the evening had got even better once Saff and I got back to the hotel.

  “When am I going to see you again then? If you’re staying in London all week.”

  “I don’t know. Why don’t I bring Saff back for Sunday lunch one weekend?”

  The initial silence from Aunt Annie was another sign of her displeasure. I could almost see her mouthing the suggestion to Uncle Col and shaking her head, trying to get him to veto it.

  “Sure, why not? It would be nice to meet her.”

  Nice.

  What a completely bland thing to say. I tried not to let it get to me. Maybe by the time we had lunch I could have something concrete to tell them about Saff and I.

  “Great, looking forward to it already. Look, I’ve got to go. Tell Uncle Col I’ll see him tomorrow. And ask him not to forget my boxers!”

  “Tris, be careful, darling. I’ll see you soon.”

  She ended the call and I stared at the screen as Saff bounced into the kitchen.

  “I’m starving. Jonas said we should order some food in.”

  “Me and my uncle didn’t put in all this work for you two to ignore the kitchen!” I pretended to be cross with her, but it was impossible.

  “I know how hard you worked.” She stopped directly in front of me, gaze firmly on my lips. “And it would be unfair of me not to thank you.”

  Saff’s mouth met mine, the kiss soft and tender at first, becoming urgent and more passionate as it went on. Her body pressed against me, her breasts crushed against my chest. If that was the kind of thanks I was going to get, I promised myself there and then I would work the hardest I had ever worked in my life.

  23

  Saff

  A piercing sound blasted through the room, jolting me awake. It seemed like only a couple of hours since I’d finally gone to sleep. Tris and I had feigned tiredness to Jonas and gone to bed early. Although it was several hours later we actually closed our eyes.

  Tris fumbled around on the floor trying to find his phone. It was his alarm which had broken my blissful slumber. I couldn’t really be angry with him though, not as he lay next to me, bare chested, his hair mussed up, eyes heavy with sleep.

  “What the hell time is it?”

  “Sorry, I still had my alarm set for the time I needed to leave Uncle Col’s place. I’ll change it for tomorrow.”

  “So it’s...?”

  “Just gone six.”

  I groaned. “Who even gets up this early?”

  “You’re probably normally going to bed then.”

  He kissed the tip of my nose and I knew he had to be teasing although I pretended to be offended. “In the days of being young, free and single, then yes, it’s highly likely I would have been.”

  “And now?”

  “Maybe you can persuade me to stay in bed instead.”

  “Whatever you say.”

  Tris’ hand slipped under the covers, his fingers sneaking into my shorts. I barely gasped as he began stroking my clit, gently at first then increasing the pressure. The rough pads of his fingertips grazed my inner thigh, the sensations between ridged and smooth causing my skin to goose. I wriggled around as he continued to tantalise me, varying the rhythm, before he finally slid a finger inside. His other hand moved to my face and he held my chin, forcing me to gaze into his eyes.

  “Look at me, Saff, I want to see your face.”

  No-one had ever said those words to me before. Then again, if I thought about it, I’d rarely had sex sober over the past few years. Waking up with someone and being clear-headed during the act was a novelty. The whole thing seemed intensified, like it meant more.

  I gripped the wrist that held my chin, nails digging into him as his motions became more deliberate, geared towards giving me pleasure. My breathing became erratic as I felt the peak rising. God, he was good.

  “Jesus, Tris!” His gaze bored right into my soul as I writhed against his hand.

  His lips crashed into mine as his tongue desperately probed my mouth, the hand which held me moving away from my chin to the back of my neck, pulling me closer.

  With one last move, he hit the sweet spot and I exploded, my body squirming from the ultimate bliss before shuddering to a climax.

  Tris drew back, licking his lips. “Are you persuaded?”

  A smile grew on my face and I felt like the cat who had got the cream. “If you wake me up like that every morning, I may never get out of bed again.”

  Eventually, I did get up. Though not before having a long messaging session with Rosie, who needed all the gossip, and agreeing to meet up with Darren, Barney and Tommo later to go over some plans for the band.

  Tris got up shortly after he got me off and as far as I could tell was working away downstairs. I took a leisurely shower, even sneaking in a little self-love to see if I could replicate Tris’ earlier actions. As I brought myself to my second orgasm of the day, I was astounded at how good I felt. Perhaps sober sex was something I should try more of.

  I stood, naked, in front of the mirror while I decided what to wear. I noticed a spark in my eyes which hadn’t been there before.

  Tris.

  Who would have thought one of Jonas’ crazy ass ideas would actually work? Now if I could get the same thing to happen with TheSB, my life really would be sorted.

  Twenty minutes later, I headed downstairs dressed in peacock blue jeans, an oversized black jumper and heeled black boots. My hair was wound up into a messy ponytail, pink strands framing my face. My make-up was dark, the eyeliner totally on point and my lips were a glossy red.

  As I entered the kitchen, Tris’ gaze homed in on me straight away, his eyes widening.

  “Morning,” I said brightly, as if I hadn’t already fallen apart around his fingers pre-breakfast.

  “Hello, Saff.” Col greeted me with a small smile. I wondered how much Tris had shared with him about our weekend. “Did you have a good time in Manchester?”

  “Yes, thanks, it was great. Tris is fantastic company.”

  He nodded. “Good to hear. You off out?”

  “Yes, I’m meeting the guys in the band for drinks and a planning session.” I failed to mention the last planning session we’d had resulted in me getting in at five in the morning, drunk and stoned and we’d made no progress with our plans at all.

  “Ah, I wondered when that was going to happen.�
�� Jonas came out of his office, mug in hand, looking for a refill. “I’ve got a couple of things you should take to them. We need to talk before you go out.” He flicked on the kettle, waiting for it to boil.

  I grabbed a mug and spooned some coffee into it. Might as well have one before I went out. As I poured the water into the cup, Tris sidled over to me.

  “You look gorgeous,” he whispered, his breath tickling my ear. “Will I see you later? Or should I head home with Uncle Col?”

  The thought of being woken up by Tris’ wonderfully talented fingers every morning was enough of a temptation, but I had to remember he had his own life too. “It’s up to you,” I said. “I honestly don’t know what time I’ll be back.”

  He looked deflated at my answer. “Oh, okay.”

  “Sorry, it’s tricky to judge what we’ll do. Sometimes when we start rehearsing, time disappears. Or if we start writing and we’re in the zone, we lose track.”

  “Right.”

  “I’m sure Jonas would be glad of the company though. He gets lonely when I’m not here.” I flashed my cousin a smile.

  “Fuck off, Saff.” It wasn’t like Jonas to be so direct. “I’ll be in the office.”

  I stirred some sugar into my coffee and followed Jonas. He was at his desk, back turned to me and I sat on the sofa, trying to see what was on his computer screen. From what I could see, it looked like a dating site.

  “You’re not trying to get me on there, are you?” I demanded. “The pretend relationship is enough.”

  “You told me last night you didn’t think it was pretend? What happened with you guys?”

  There were some things I really didn’t want to share with my cousin. Like exactly how good Tris was in bed. I felt a flush creep over my skin.

  “I like him, Jonas. We had a lot of fun. It was a nice, normal weekend.”