Ballsy

by Sean Ashcroft

  “You’ve come a long way from the cute skinny little nerd I used to know,” Sam said. “How come no one scooped you up?”

  Ben wet his lips. “I guess I knew who I wanted,” he said softly. “And he wasn’t around, so…”

  “He’s around now,” Sam murmured. “Assuming you’re talking about me, I mean.”

  Ben nodded. “I am. You’re everything I ever wanted.”

  Sam’s heart leapt in his chest, leaving him breathless for a moment. Ben wanted him. Ben had always wanted him.

  This was all starting to feel as though it was worth it.

  He leaned in again to claim Ben’s lips, settling his hands on Ben’s newly-bare waist to hold him in place, keep him here as long as possible. If this was all he got, he’d be happy.

  That didn’t stop him from wanting more.

  With a surge of confidence, Sam pressed forward, backing Ben up toward the bed and not stopping until Ben was forced to sit on the mattress. Sam climbed onto his lap before Ben had a chance to react, nibbling on his lip, pressing his erection up against his stomach.

  Without breaking the kiss this time, he reached down to tug Ben’s pants open, making a soft, happy noise as he found Ben hard as well. Arousal curled low in his gut as he shoved his hand into Ben’s pants to stroke him through the fabric of his underwear.

  Ben squirmed under him, low, needy noises catching in his throat as Sam pushed his underwear aside and freed his cock. It was thicker than Sam had been expecting, the dark head already shining with precome. Wetting his lips, he took it in his hand and wrapped his fingers around it, listening for the soft grunt of pleasure in response.

  Sam closed his eyes, taking in the velvety-soft skin under his fingers, giving a few quick tugs that made Ben’s breath hitch. Ben whimpered as Sam took his hand away again, his fingers digging deep into the flesh of Sam’s thighs, a silent plea for more.

  “Patience,” Sam murmured. “Is this… have you ever, umm…?”

  “Not with a man,” Ben said, his voice rough with arousal, catching on every other syllable. “And not for a while, either.”

  “You know how it’s done?” Sam asked, reaching out for the basket of lube and condoms that was still sitting beside the bed from the first day. He was glad now that he’d been too lazy to move them back to the bathroom.

  “In principle,” Ben said. “I don’t know if you should trust me to-”

  Sam stopped him mid-sentence by shoving one of the miniature tubes of lubricant into his hand. “I trust you,” he murmured. “You’re patient, your nails are short, and you’ll listen to me if I tell you to stop.”

  “Okay,” Ben said, dropping his gaze to the lube. Sam watched him pour a generous bead out onto his fingers, licking his lips. He’d wanted this a thousand times, and now he was finally getting it.

  A tight knot of anticipation built in Sam’s stomach as Ben warmed the lube between his fingers. He shuffled back a little to give Ben easier access, spreading his legs a little wider. This was an awkward position, but he couldn’t bring himself to lose the contact he had right now.

  Sam never wanted to let go of Ben again. Not now that they were finally doing this.

  Sam’s breath hitched at the first touch of Ben’s fingers against him. He squirmed at the way Ben was stroking the sensitive skin under his thighs with the pad of his thumb, the way his fingertips were circling his hole, but not pushing inside just yet.

  The wait was agonizing. Sam had never been good at patience, but he was even worse at it right now.

  He’d been waiting fifteen years for this.

  He rocked back and forth, just a little, just enough to encourage Ben to move. Maybe he was nervous, maybe he was teasing—either way, Sam wanted more, and he wanted it now.

  “Come on,” Sam pleaded. “You have no idea how good this is gonna feel.”

  “I’m starting to get the idea,” Ben mumbled, heat rolling off him as he blushed.

  Sam closed his eyes tight, focusing on the single finger that was pressing against him now, rocking his hips again, pushing down so Ben would know it was okay, he wanted this, he was ready for it.

  He’d never been more ready for anything in his life.

  Finally, Ben added just a little more pressure, pushing the tip of his finger inside Sam. Stars burst behind Sam’s eyelids. He was so close to getting what he wanted now that he could almost taste it.

  He pressed his mouth to crook of Ben’s neck, sucking on the delicate skin there. Not hard enough to bruise—he got the feeling Ben wouldn’t appreciate that, not right now—but hard enough to give him something in return, some feedback that this was good, this was what he needed.

  Sam groaned lowly as Ben pushed the rest of his finger inside, his cock twitching against his stomach, leaving a sticky trail of precome.

  “Good?” Ben asked, breathless, his chest heaving against Sam’s.

  Sam nodded eagerly. “You don’t need to be this gentle,” he murmured, trailing his nose up Ben’s neck and then sucking his earlobe into his mouth.

  This time, Ben’s cock twitched, brushing against Sam’s as he rocked his hips back and forth. Sam chuckled at the response, excited to know that he’d found a sensitive spot. That information was bound to come in handy later.

  He moved both hands away from where he’d been using them for balance and shoved his fingers deep into Ben’s hair, tucking his thumbs behind his ears so he could rub circles into the delicate skin there.

  Ben grunted at first, then slipped his finger back out. Sam got halfway through a whine of complaint before he was cut off, Ben shoving two inside him in place of the first one.

  This was more like it.

  Sam bit down on his lip as he adjusted, then rolled his hips in a full circle, forcing Ben’s fingers deeper inside him, gasping as they brushed over a sensitive spot. A bead of precome rolled down the length of Sam’s almost painfully hard cock, sending a shiver down his spine.

  He leaned in closer to kiss Ben, nipping at his lower lip and then swiping his tongue along the inside of it, breathing in his scent deeply. The massage oil from earlier was still clinging to his skin, the smell making Sam’s mouth water all over again.

  “I will give you a neck massage every single day if I can fuck you after,” Sam murmured, resting his forehead against Ben’s and increasing the pace of his hips, shifting his position a little to take full advantage of Ben’s fingers inside him.

  He couldn’t wait to be filled by Ben’s cock, but this was good, too. Anything he could get from Ben was good.

  All the same, the sound of a foil packet crinkling made Sam sigh with relief. They were finally getting to the main event.

  It was a minor miracle that he hadn’t already come all over his own stomach. He wanted Ben inside him when he came, but having Ben touch him at all was so good that holding out was becoming more of a challenge with every passing second.

  “Are you, uh… umm… ready?” Ben asked, stumbling over each syllable.

  Hearing Ben get flustered over this was almost hotter than having his fingers up his ass.

  Sam glanced down at Ben’s cock, considered, and then decided that if he didn’t get it inside him now, he might come early and lose his only chance. He was as ready as he needed to be.

  “Ready when you are,” he responded, raising his hips so Ben could move his hand.

  Biting his lip as Ben’s fingers left him, Sam shifted his position, moving closer, and angled himself so that the head of Ben’s cock was pressed against his hole.

  It felt bigger than it had looked, but he wasn’t about to back out now. Instead, he lowered his hips, gasping as Ben’s cock stretched him wide, his thighs trembling with the effort of keeping him steady. A low groan escaped him as he settled into Ben’s lap, the stretch just on the edge of painful, forcing him to wriggle his hips as he got comfortable.

  Sam could feel beads of sweat forming on his forehead, the combination of arousal and physical effort making his whole body seem too
hot.

  “How did I never know you had a huge cock?” Sam asked, still breathless.

  “I… do?” Ben looked up at him. His eyes were dark, his lips parted just a little, his hair already a mess from where Sam’s fingers had been running through it. Loathe as he was to let go, Sam moved his hands to Ben’s shoulders instead, needing to grip them for leverage.

  He chuckled at Ben’s response as it hit him, delayed by everything else that was going on. Ben wasn’t a virgin, but it was just like him that he’d never realized how big he was.

  “Yeah.” Sam shifted side to side, getting used to the slightly-too-big intrusion. Once he’d adjusted, it’d be perfect. He could definitely get used to having a boyfriend this big.

  That was, if Ben wanted to be his boyfriend.

  He really hoped so.

  “Oh.” Ben swallowed, blinking a few times. Heat was rolling off him in waves, and Sam could feel the tension in his hips and thighs. Ben was holding back, remaining calm, but only through sheer force of will.

  “Is it, uh. Okay?” Ben asked, his voice trembling. He moved one hand from Sam’s thigh to his ass, his thumb pressing in deep as he spread his legs just a little wider, gave his hips a single, experimental thrust.

  Sam’s breath hitched at the movement, his senses so overloaded that he could feel Ben’s cock shifting inside him, feel every tiny movement deep in his gut. He knew it had been a while, but he also knew that he was recording every moment of this to revisit forever. If Ben never wanted to do this again, Sam intended to preserve the memory.

  “Perfect,” Sam gasped. “You’re perfect,” he added, darting closer to catch Ben’s lips, rolling his hips in a slow circle and whining in the back of his throat as every nerve ending inside him lit up, every muscle in his body tensed with renewed urgency.

  “You’re perfect,” Ben responded between kisses, moving his other hand so they were both gripping Sam’s ass, pulling him in closer.

  Unable to hold back any longer, Sam raised his hips by inches and slammed them back down, setting a pace that would mean neither of them lasted much longer. It didn’t matter. He wanted to get Ben off, make him grunt and moan and come sobbing.

  He wanted Ben begging for more later, he wanted this to be so good that Ben wouldn’t be able to resist him, that he wouldn’t have second thoughts. Not now, not ever.

  “You feel so good,” Sam murmured, resting his forehead against Ben’s again, gripping his shoulders harder. Now that the discomfort had faded, he sped up his strokes, rocking back and forth eagerly on Ben’s cock.

  Hot need built in his stomach, tension building in his thighs, at the base of his spine, making his balls heavy. Soft grunts and needy whimpers replaced the conversation, the unmistakable sound of skin hitting skin punctuating every low moan.

  Sam screwed his eyes shut and bit his lip, concentrating on the burning in his overworked thighs, the pressure in his gut, the jagged build toward his orgasm, every thrust rubbing his cock against Ben’s skin, sending sharp spikes of pleasure directly to his balls.

  Concentrating on every breath Ben took, on the way his own heartbeat was pounding in his ears, on the citrus scent of his shampoo, on the agonizing push-pull of frustration and release, on the pads of Ben’s fingers sinking so hard and deep into the flesh of his ass that he knew there’d be bruises later.

  “So close,” Sam whispered, his voice rough and soft. “So close,” he gasped for breath, his head spinning, his lungs burning for air.

  He still couldn’t get his mind off how deep Ben was inside him, how connected they were right now, how he never wanted to be anywhere but in Ben’s lap, taking his gorgeous cock and getting off on it.

  Ben nodded, either to let Sam know he understood, or to agree that he was close, too, or just because it was the only thing he could manage to do in response right now. Sam sped up again, putting his entire weight behind each thrust, needy moans breaking free of his throat as he approached the edge of coming, urgency spurring him on.

  The next moment, Ben growled lowly and pulled Sam in hard, bucking his hips up into him as much as his position allowed, threatening to topple them both over.

  That was all it took to set Sam off, his own hips jerking forward as the lightning-bolt rush of his orgasm hit him, deep inside at first, then shooting through his balls and finally, his cock. He coated Ben’s stomach with come, still rocking and bucking against him as aftershocks of pleasure made him gasp and moan.

  For long moments after, all Sam could hear was the rush of blood in his own ears, the sound of himself gasping for breath. He leaned heavily against Ben, unable to get his worn-out muscles to cooperate for the moment.

  As always, Ben took his weight without complaint.

  Ben wriggled after a few moments, and Sam grunted at the sensation of Ben’s softened cock slipping out of him, obviously spent.

  It was a shame that he’d missed seeing Ben’s face when he came. He’d have to pay more attention next time.

  “Wow,” Ben said, his voice deep and rough. “That was, uh. Wow.”

  Sam chuckled, climbing off him gingerly and crawling onto the bed to lie down. “Yeah,” he said, staring up at the ceiling.

  He could say something more intelligent about it later.

  The sound of rustling fabric caught his attention, but he couldn’t be bothered moving to look and see what was going on.

  He figured it out a few moments later, when Ben landed next to him on the bed, just close enough for them to touch in a few places.

  “Nap time,” Sam said, stretching his fingers and curling his toes before letting himself sink into the mattress beneath him.

  “Okay,” Ben responded softly, settling in as well.

  Sam reached out to take his hand, his heart skipping when Ben accepted it, resting both of them on his chest so that Sam could feel his heartbeat slowing down progressively.

  He knew he’d be sore when he woke up, but for now, he couldn’t bring himself to care. As long as he had Ben, he was happy.

  Chapter Fourteen

  The air outside made goosebumps spring up all over Ben’s skin as soon as he left the warm, cozy confines of his and Sam’s room, but he needed a moment to think, so he braved it anyway. It wasn’t cold, exactly, but he’d been so warm next to Sam that it seemed that way.

  Living in LA all his life had turned him into the kind of person who didn’t deal well with the cold, though he imagined Sam had learned to. There were lots of things Sam would have learned that Ben never had.

  That didn’t mean anything, though. Doubts kept creeping into Ben’s mind, but none of them held up as soon as he shone a light on them. So what if Sam had seen the world? Some people would have killed to spend all their working life in Los Angeles instead.

  Ben had been worried about not being up to Sam’s expectations, but the sex had felt good, and he hoped Sam would have told him if he needed something else. There was no reason they wouldn’t be okay.

  No reason except Ben letting his doubts and fears get to him, again.

  He had to be smarter than that this time. Knowing now what he and Sam could have had back when they were younger, he couldn’t lose it all over again.

  Although, maybe they couldn’t have had this. Maybe they were both too young and stupid, maybe they would have burned hot and fast, but fizzled out. Ben was starting to convince himself that this was all for the best.

  He and Sam were finally both in a place where they could love each other, and their youthful inexperience wasn’t going to get in the way.

  “Looks like this place is working for you.”

  Ben turned around to see Annie approaching him from behind. He’d thought he was alone, and the sudden intrusion was a shock.

  “I don’t follow,” Ben said, though he had to admit to himself that she was right. Somehow, this actually had worked at getting him back together with Sam.

  Or getting them together in the first place. Ben still wasn’t sure how to label what they’d had befo
re, or what they had now, but he was starting to think it didn’t matter. As long as Sam was there beside him, he didn’t really care what they called it.

  “You and Sam are having sex again. I know the look.”

  Ben blushed, but held her gaze. He wasn’t embarrassed about Sam.

  He was proud. He was proud that someone like Sam, someone so bright, so experienced, so brave and fun and everything he wasn’t would want to be with him.

  There wasn’t really any point in lying about it.

  “Uh, yeah,” Ben said, watching her closely as she took a few more steps toward him. It felt too close, but then, this was an uncomfortable conversation.

  Not because it involved Sam, exactly, but because it was happening at all.

  “Good.” Annie smiled brightly at him.

  Then, before Ben could react, she closed the gap between them, wrapped her hand around the back of his neck, and pulled him down into a kiss.

  Shock prevented him from pushing her away at first, then fear of hurting her made him pause before he pulled back, stumbling away, dazed by the sudden, unexpected assault.

  He’d noticed Annie flirting with him, but this… this was still not something he’d expected.

  The look on Annie’s face changed immediately. The bright, pleasant smile twisted into a heart-wrenching smirk, one that made Ben’s stomach go cold.

  The feeling of having fallen into a trap, with the walls closing around him, set in immediately. This was like looking up from the bottom of a hole and seeing a wolf circling at the top.

  “He means a lot to you,” Annie said. “But he’s unsure of your feelings for him. Something happened to him, something that left him scarred and changed. He doesn’t think you still love him.”

  Ben swallowed.

  What if that was true? What if she meant to tell Sam that Ben had left him asleep and immediately gone out to cheat on him.

  “He’ll believe me when I show him the conveniently-recorded video of this. His bisexual boyfriend who wouldn’t have sex with him cheating on him with a woman? That has to be all his worst fears right there. He’s gonna think you were so repulsed by him that you had to scrub the taste out of your mouth. Metaphorically speaking.” She smirked. “Or not.”