by K. G. Reuss
But then he looks at me, his full lips curving up into that teasing smile, and I find that I don’t give a damn. I want to experience whatever Carter George is willing to give me.
Carter helps me into the car, sitting between me and Derek. The warmth from his body causes a shiver to rush through me.
“Are you comfortable?” he asks, quirking an eyebrow up at me.
I’d be better if I was on your lap!
My face heats at the thought, but I manage to smile at him like I’m not having the world’s dirtiest thoughts.
“I’m fine. Thanks,” I say, going breathless as he reaches over me to latch my seatbelt.
“Safety first.” He casts a playful wink at me, the back of his hand brushing gently over my breasts. I’m not sure if it’s an accident or on purpose, but my mind demands I believe he wanted to do that because the alternative upsets me.
With all of us safely buckled in, we make our way to the restaurant.
“I hope they have chicken tenders,” Derek says as we pull up, his dark eyes narrow at the posh building.
Carter snorts at him, and even I chuckle. Secretly, I’m hoping they do too. The idea of eating anything that resembles an insect has anxiety uncoiling in my chest.
The moment we’re out of the car, Carter holds his arm out for me to take. I do so without hesitation, casting a smile up at him. He wastes no time returning it, which only jolts the butterflies to life in my stomach.
“Right this way, please” a host greets us and takes us to our table. Carter pulls my chair out for me and runs his fingers between my shoulder blades as he pulls his own chair out to sit. The teasing look in his eyes makes a shiver run the length of my spine.
We’re left with menus, and Derek is quick to breathe a sigh of relief at finding something he’ll eat.
“I’m not picky,” he argues as Carter points it out to him. “I just know what I like and prefer to stick to it. My stomach doesn’t always take kindly to new dishes.”
“It’s a shame because this is going to be amazing,” Carter insists, breathing in deeply.
I have to admit it does smell divine in here. His gaze rests on me. “How about you, Teddy? What are you having?”
I scan the menu quickly and glance at Derek who grins at me.
“She wants chicken tenders too,” he says.
“Come on, Teddy!” Carter rolls his eyes. “We’re traveling the country. We’re experiencing what this great city has to offer. Don’t deny the adventure.”
“I’m not denying it,” I defend myself, lifting my brows at him. His hand comes to rest over mine. I bite back the whimper that rises inside me at his warm touch.
“Live a little, Teddy Bear,” he says softly, his thumb tracing a tender circle on my skin. “Live with me in this moment. You won’t regret it.”
How the hell can I say no to that? If his words and tender nickname don’t capture me, the look in his eyes does.
“OK.” I nod, letting out the breath I’m holding. A wide smile spreads over Carter’s face that has me grinning.
“Don’t let him do that to you,” Derek groans.
“Do what?” Carter asks innocently, removing his touch from my hand.
“You know what! All you have to do is look at a woman, and she swoons. Add to it your moves, and they don’t stand a chance.”
Carter lets out a loud laugh at Derek. I frown.
Did he seriously just play me?
“Did you just trick me?” I demand.
Carter stops laughing, his eyes filled with warmth as they come to focus on me.
“I’m just looking for a little adventure, sweetheart. Thought you were too. That’s all.”
Well, two can play that game.
I move my hand to rest on Carter’s thigh. He tenses beneath my touch, obviously surprised at this turn of events. I pop a brow at him, my hand moving higher. He shifts beneath my touch, but not away. Oh no, not Carter George. If anything, he’s enjoying the game we’re playing with one another.
I rub his thigh gently, discretely, as Derek tries to engage Carter in a conversation about the next place we’re going once we leave New Orleans.
“I’m thinking the Grand Canyon,” Carter says with a shrug. “Unless there’s somewhere Teddy wants to see. How about it, Teddy?” His eyes are hooded as he focuses them on me, my hand rubbing the junction of where his thigh meets his groin.
Oh yeah. I’m going there.
“What do you want?” he murmurs at me, the question loaded.
“I want what you want,” I answer, hoping we’re on the same page.
A tiny smirk cuts across his handsome face.
“I think we’re in the same state of mind.” His hand reaches down and takes mine before full on placing it over the very large erection he’s sporting beneath the table. He gives me a wink before releasing my hand. My face heats at his boldness and the fact that for once in my life, I don’t know how to react.
Carter George just upped the ante.
Seventeen
Carter
Teddy has me so hot. I have a hard time focusing through dinner. I know what I said. I know I said I wouldn’t pursue anything, but damnit, I want what I want.
There’s nothing wrong with just playing. Maybe she’ll get bored of the games.
But God, I don’t want her to.
She’s all I can concentrate on at dinner, missing the warmth from her hand as it’s now holding her spoon. Her cute nose is turned up as she stares down at the meal I know she’s nervous about.
“All you have to do is open your mouth and put it in,” I say to her in a husky voice, something other than food on my mind.
Her cheeks flush pink, and I imagine that’s the color her sexy ass would be if I could just turn her over my knee and give her the spanking she’s earned for giving my dick a bit of hope.
She does as I suggest, a soft moan leaving her lips as she chews.
Fuck. She’s so sexy it should be a sin.
I grin, digging into my own gumbo.
Derek gives us a look that suggests we might be crazy. I shrug it off. Fuck it. Food is good. Company is even better. I’m living for it.
“There are some good clubs down on Bourbon,” Derek says, taking a sip of water. “We should hit one up, or as many as we want. I was checking out some really cool places on my phone before we left.”
“Sounds good. Teddy?” I glance over at her.
“Sure.” She shrugs, winking at me. “Let’s do it.”
“Let’s do it.” I smirk back.
“Wow!” Teddy laughs, leaning in so I can hear her.
The club music is so loud it makes me wince. It’s creating a dull ache in my head that I’m praying doesn’t trigger one of my headaches. Her hair brushes my cheek, and I’m instantly hard as steel again with thoughts of running my tongue over her sensuous neck.
She points in the direction of Derek who’s dancing up on two females. They seem rather excited by his nearness since they’re touching him back.
“I didn’t know Derek was like that!” Teddy continues, shaking her head in shock. “Look at his moves!” And she’s right. Derek can dance.
“Like I said, we’re all on an adventure,” I reply, smiling as Derek is sandwiched between the two women, a grin plastered from ear to ear across his face.
“Do you want to dance?” She motions to the dance floor.
There’s a painful spasm in my head, and I grimace. The smile on Teddy’s lips falters as she takes it to mean no.
Fucking tumors.
“Why don’t you go dance? I could use a drink,” I say, my heart deflating. I want nothing more than to dance with her. I’ve been sporting a semi-hard-on since dinner just being near her.
She gives me a smile that doesn’t reach her eyes and nods. “OK.”
And with that, she sashays away. Her luscious ass is all I can focus on until my hands twitch.
“Fuck,” I hiss, giving them a shake.
My head is
starting to pound. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea. I make my way to the bathroom where I splash cold water on my face. The image in the mirror looks a little gaunt. I’m a built guy, having honed every muscle to perfection, but as I stare at myself in the overly bright mirror, all I see are dark circles, cheeks that are starting to sink in, and pants that are too loose from losing weight.
I grip the sink tightly, hauling in a few deep, calming breaths before I pull my bottle of pain pills from my pocket and swallow one down in the hopes of maybe one more night of normalcy. Just one more fucking night. It’s all I ever wish for.
I grab a drink at the bar. Then another one. Derek and Teddy are dancing together. I hate that. She throws her head back and laughs as he makes some weird move against her, a grin on his face. I should be grateful they’re getting along, but I’m not. I’m jealous that he’s enjoying her company while I continue to throw back drinks in the hopes of drowning my pitiful reality.
I watch them dance through three more songs before some guy cuts in. Derek steps away and turns to some other girl and dances with her. I throw back another drink as one song ends and another begins. The new guy is getting too close to her. She’s starting to look uncomfortable as his hands rest on her ass.
I finish my drink and make my way over to her.
I decide to let the alcohol do my talking.
“Hey, baby,” I coo in her ear, wrapping my arms around her waist from behind and tugging her against me and away from the shithead who thinks he can touch her. She turns around, her arms encircling my neck as she presses herself against me.
“Thank you,” she says in my ear as I lean down to hear her. “I was about to commit a crime.”
I chuckle softly, enjoying the fact she hasn’t told me to remove my hands from her ass. Her arms are still around me, and she moves against me to the music.
Restraint, Carter.
I’m trying, but it’s a helluva struggle.
She spins so her ass grinds against my cock. I let out a low hiss, my hands shaking on her waist. Her arms are around my neck again, pulling my face to her neck. My hands travel lower, exploring the way she feels tucked against me. My fingers dance along the hem of her short dress, her cleavage in my line of sight.
And oh what a glorious sight it is. What I wouldn’t give to taste her on my tongue. On my lips.
Fuck.
My dick aches with need as she grinds against me. Teddy could probably get me off just by dancing on me. In fact, if we don’t slow it down, I’ll be spilling my raging want of her in my damn pants.
Her hair is falling down in dark tendrils around her. It’s making my need grow.
“Teddy,” I growl against her ear.
Her answer is to bend over before slowly moving up, her eyes focused on me over her shoulder.
I really am a dead man.
Hastily, I tug her back against me, letting her ass continue its torture against my cock. Teddy isn’t innocent, something I find extremely attractive. Most women want to play sweet, but not Teddy. She gives it how it is, even if I don’t like it. And even if I fucking love it.
She spins to face me, her arms back to resting casually around my neck like they’ve been there a thousand times. There’s a twinkle in her eye that makes me smile. I lean down and let myself slip for just a minute, my lips skimming across the soft skin of her neck.
She smells like fucking freedom. A place I want to get lost in. A future I never cared about until she came along.
But I’m Carter George, and the only future I have will be carved on a piece of granite in a cemetery no one will ever visit.
I tighten my hold on her, living in this one blissful moment. These are the moments I’ve been searching for. The moments that make my shit hole of a life finally worth something.
I want her so badly my heart physically aches. I pull away and give her a smile she returns, no questions asked.
This is the first time in my life I’ve wanted something and couldn’t have it.
And it fucking sucks. She’s not a million-dollar deal. I can’t claim her then rip her apart like Carter 1.0 would have done.
Or I could but at the cost of her heart.
Diary
Day 17
Last night, I went to bed with blue balls. I didn’t make a move past that slip of a kiss on her neck. She didn’t push me. But Teddy likes to hit me with surprises. It’s something that fuels my fire. And I don’t mean to just “get her”. This is about more than that. It makes me want to get up every morning. It terrifies me at night as I think about leaving the world without her.
Not that I want to kill her and take her with me. I’m not a psycho. I just mean being alone for eternity. If we’re talking about believing in a higher power, I believe that while I’m roasting marshmallows in Hell, Teddy will eventually get married, have children, make some other man happy.
Am I a prick for not wanting her to have that with someone unless that someone is me?
This is the torturous shit that’s been plaguing me since she came into my life.
Fuck it. Maybe I should just ask a higher power.
Dear Diary, how the hell do I get the girl and beat this disease?
Send help.
-Carter.
Eighteen
Teddy
I’ve been battling the sun shining through the window for an hour now. The thin white curtain does little to shield me from the sunlight.
I squint at the material. It reminds me of one of my grandmother’s old curtains. The sides of her curtains were worn thin from years of constantly checking the driveway, waiting for my grandfather to come home from the war. ‘Til death do they part.
I’m not sure I’d have the strength to wait that long for someone. Their love ran deeper than the time of their separation. Sigh.
I know deep down inside Grandmother Bruce would be happy I’m out here fighting for my own place in this world without my dad, but I’m running pretty low on fighting fuel at the moment.
Carter used it all up last night. We parted ways on the dance floor; me to go to the restroom and him to sit down. He kept rubbing his temples like another headache was stealing him from me. Even after we separated, I could still feel his lips on my throat like they branded a tattoo on my skin.
He was the last thought on my mind before I drifted off to sleep, and then during my restlessness all through the night. Bits and pieces of us dining, dancing, and his warm lips on my skin kept passing through my dreams. He’d be with me, then he’d disappear, and just when I got frustrated, he’d appear again.
Molly barks in the kitchen a few times. I throw the sheet off me and let my feet dangle off the loft bed. She must be hungry. I push myself to sit up when there’s a knock at my door.
“Yes,” I say with a yawn. “It’s not locked. You can come in.” I rub the sleep from my eyes and am surprised when my eyes open to find Carter standing in the doorway.
“Do you want to take a ride with me?” A smile spreads across his face.
“To where?”
“Just out and about. Nowhere in particular. I feel like driving today.” He shrugs.
My eyebrows knit in confusion. “Can you drive this big thing? What does Derek call it…the Beastmaster?”
His eyes crinkle with amusement. “Nooooo. I can’t drive this thing. We have my car with us, but you didn’t know that, did you? C’mon then. You’re in for a surprise.”
“I need a shower. Give me thirty?” I jump down from the bed and grab my robe off the hook. With him standing in my room, it suddenly feels smaller and intensely hot.
He turns sideways to let me pass through the door. “Hurry up, buttercup,” he teases, swatting my ass as I squeeze between him and the door.
Within twenty minutes, we’re standing at the rear of the bus, waiting for the back hatch to lower. My eyes are fixed on the door as it slowly reveals the ‘surprise’ awaiting me. “Wow, Carter. Look at her. She’s beautiful. May I back her out?”
&nbs
p; His Adam’s apple bobs up and down with uncertainty, but he’s a brave man because he dangles the keys in my face. “Sure. Why not?”
I take the keys from his fingers and stand on my tiptoes, kissing him quickly on the cheek. “Thank you. I promise, I’m a good driver.” I race up the ramp and slide into the driver’s seat. I adjust it for my long legs and angle all of the mirrors for my height before pressing the ignition button. “Oh, baby. She purrs like a lover being stroked,” I say as he joins me in the passenger seat.
“Yes, that would be the appropriate analogy.” He laughs loudly.
I back her out nice and gentle, despite the temptation rushing through me to floor the gas pedal and open her up. We pull up next to the RV, and I regretfully place her back in park.
“Chinese fire drill?” I ask, feeling my cheeks redden with my bold challenge.
“You’re on, sister.” He throws open the door and bolts toward the front as I dart around the back. We both slide into the other’s seat and shut the doors at the same time. “Looks like it was a tie.”
“That’s OK. It’s early in the trip. I’m sure there’ll be plenty of other times to beat you coming up.”
He throws his head back and laughs loudly. He’s still laughing as we drive out of the RV park and into the morning rush hour traffic.
As we wait to enter the highway, he lets the top down and a hot wind blows across my face.
“We’re heading to the Grand Canyon next. Does that excite you?” he asks, glancing over at me.
“I’ve been there before. My family took me when I was ten. I was bored the whole time.” I unwrap the hair tie from my wrist and throw my hair up into a messy bun. Sweat is already trickling down my temple, and it’s not even 9:00 AM yet.
“Bored? I can’t imagine being bored at the Grand Canyon.”