by Willow Aster
“Aren’t you going to introduce us to your friend?” Jade speaks up.
“Oh! Yes, this is Lars. He was my instructor this morning.”
Ian nods and reaches out to shake his hand. “Ian.”
“Jade and Wendy.” I do a sweeping arm in their direction.
“You should join us,” Jade announces. “We’re going to that pizza place on the corner. Come with us.”
Lars looks at me and raises his eyebrows. “Well, sure. I don’t want to intrude, but pizza sounds good, actually.”
Jade links her arm through Ian’s, and he looks at me with a mixture of confusion and apology.
“Sparrow?” Lars asks. “You’re going, right?”
“Uh, yeah … I’m going. I’m starving.”
Lars chats all the way to the tram. Jade and Ian walk in front of us, and she’s hanging all over him. Jared and Jake meet us on the tram. Lars sits in the seat next to me and I feel Ian’s eyes on us the whole ride. I avoid looking at him. If he wants Jade attached to his hip tonight, he can have her.
At the restaurant, I find myself between Lars and Ian. It feels like the day I met Ian all over again. Except Lars is a lot more attentive than Michael was. By the time the night is over, I’m exhausted with trying to block the levels of testosterone that seem to be bouncing off the walls by the minute. Ian keeps his arm on the back of my chair, his hand lightly resting on my back, but Lars seems oblivious and keeps interrogating me with first date questions.
Jade is getting more and more agitated because now she not only doesn’t have Ian’s attention, but she doesn’t have the new guy’s either. It’s obvious she’s used to being the center of the hurricane. I’m dying from all the attention and wish I could just go back to the condo and cover my head.
When I’ve answered where I’m from, where I’m going to school, what my major is, my favorite color, if I have pets, do I want any pets and have I ever thought of spending summers in Colorado, Ian finally speaks up.
“Hey, little bird … do you have plans for tomorrow night?”
That shuts Lars up.
It shuts me up too and I wasn’t even talking. Little Bird, I kinda like that. Makes me feel delicate and not so … tall and gangly.
“Ohhh…” Lars says. He smiles weakly at me.
I feel bad for Lars and shoot dagger eyes to Ian. He laughs and shrugs, then he leans over and whispers, “I’ll let you get back to this little … whatever this —,” he subtly points to Lars, “—is … for tonight. As long as I can please have you tomorrow night?”
I want to murder him and thank him at the same time. Lars’s Twenty Questions were about to send me running for the hills.
“Shut. It.” My whisper comes out with a bite.
He rears his head back and laughs and then comes back in for my ear. I want to bop the mischief right off his face. “Just trying to get a word in,” he whispers. “I meant it, though…”
He looks at my mouth and all reasonable thought leaves my brain. Fortunately, Jade comes to my rescue and pulls the focus back on herself.
“Ian! I talked to Milly the other day.”
There’s a turn in the air as Ian acknowledges Jade’s statement. It feels a bit thicker in here, like a huge fog just rolled into the restaurant.
“Cool,” he says. “How’s she doing?”
“Great! She’s loving life. I think she’ll be getting pregnant before we know it.” Jade looks at me and then says, “You know … you kind of look like Milly.” Her lip curls just a touch when she says it.
I don’t want to give her the satisfaction, but I am curious. “Who’s Milly?”
I can tell by Jade’s smirk that I’ve done exactly what she hoped I would—taken her bait. She’s very pleased to be the one to tell me that Milly is Ian’s ex-girlfriend.
“They dated forever,” she says. “I love that girl. She’s so funny … and gorgeous.”
“You don’t look alike,” he assures me. “And we obviously didn’t date forever.”
Somehow that doesn’t make me feel better. I don’t like the feeling in the room. The shift in Ian’s mood is enough to dispel any lighthearted vibes I had picked up from him all night. I’m ready to go and I don’t care if I ever see Jade again. She’s trouble, that one.
“You think you’ll ever be married to anything other than your music, Ian?” Apparently, Jade is just getting started.
I turn to Ian and I don’t like how sad his eyes have turned. “Well, it is the only thing I’m good at,” he says quietly.
“Lars, I’m ready to go. How about you?”
Lars brightens up and there is a momentary twinge of guilt when I realize I might be getting his hopes up. I determine to straighten that out on the way to the Lodge.
Ian stands up as I put on my coat. “Sparrow, wait, I can—”
“I’m sure I’ll see you tomorrow, Ian … thanks for the fun day. Goodnight, everyone.”
Jared watches the whole exchange. He hasn’t said much all night. I wonder what he’s thinking.
The next morning, my parents and I head out to ski together. When we open the door to our condo, Ian is just walking up with 4 steaming coffees.
“Oh, Ian, how nice!” my mom gushes. She doesn’t tell him that we just finished 2 cups of coffee with our breakfast.
“I’m probably too late, but I hoped I’d catch you before you went out. You up for having one more with you today?” He looks at all of us as he asks, but his eyes land on me last.
I don’t answer his question, but take the coffee and thank him for it. I look at my dad and he answers for all of us.
“Sure! The more, the merrier!” My dad chuckles. He is the nicest guy, he really is.
“Great,” Ian lets out a breath and for a minute there, I think he’s nervous. Ian Sterling is actually nervous.
“You’re looking sweet this morning, Little Bird,” he says low and sexy. And there it went. All nervousness out the door for him and back on me in heaps.
My mom’s eyes light up at his endearment, while I shake my head at it. “Little Bird? Do I look little to you?”
“You do have a point there,” he whispers and I swear his eyes do a sweep over my chest. Oh my word.
That’s it. I tell my parents we’ll meet them in five minutes and as soon as they walk off, I light into him.
“Look. I can’t handle the little innuendos in front of my parents today. I’m not sure I can when it’s just the two of us, but my ‘Little Bird’ heart REALLY can’t take it in front of them. If you want to be with us today, behave!”
He laughs so hard, he has to bend over to catch his breath.
“Oh, Sparrow … you are … perfection.”
He is wiping tears from the corners of his eyes, his now standard reaction to me, I note as I glare at him.
“Don’t you think that was just a tiny bit funny?” He holds up his thumb and forefinger close together and quirks his eyebrow.
“You … are … trouble.” I huff.
He nods and pulls a solemn face. “You’re right about that.”
Ian is on his best behavior the rest of the day. My parents love him. We have a blast on the slopes, and the worn-out feeling we have when we’re done feels good. As we’re walking back to the condo, he brings up our date.
“Are you still up for going out with me tonight?”
“I don’t remember ever agreeing to that.”
He stops and puts his hand on my arm. “You’re right. You didn’t.” There isn’t any teasing in his voice now. He’s completely serious. “Tonight.”
“Well, my parents were hoping we’d join them tonight. I think they’re wanting to do an early birthday surprise for Jeff while everyone’s together.”
“Oh, Laila did mention something about that. I didn’t realize it was tonight. All right. Tomorrow night?”
“Tomorrow night is the Pictionary competition at Wendy’s!”
“Well, we certainly can’t miss that!” he says, matching my tone. �
�That leaves our last night. Do you think you can carve time out of your busy schedule to go out with me Friday?”
“I guess I can squeeze you in.”
He looks me up and down and I don’t even want to know what his dirty little mind is cooking up. I’m too afraid to know.
Jeff’s party is in the swankier restaurant of the Lodge. The fun seems to be in full swing when my parents and I get there. I immediately find Ian. He’s surrounded by beautiful women and seems completely at ease. I’m not sure how he can see past the blond in front of him, she leads with her breasts, but somehow he manages to spot me immediately. I watch as he excuses himself and hightails it my way.
He’s eying me like I’m a dessert he wants to inhale. It seems my red cocktail dress was the right choice, after all.
“Damn, Sparrow. Fu—” he clears his throat and gives his hair a tug. I love it when he does that. It makes his already messy hair look even more disheveled. It levels me. Like a bulldozer that completely flattens the ground and doesn’t leave a single grain of dirt in the wrong place. I don’t even want to think straight when he looks this good.
“Ian.”
“You…” He’s quiet for what feels like minutes, but probably isn’t.
“Yes?”
He does the hair thing again and I try to hold my ground without a) going down, or b) blushing. So far, I’m still standing. Pretty sure my neck and face are the shade of my dress.
“You look nice tonight,” I tell him.
“You…” he shakes his head. “God, girl, you’ve rendered me speechless.”
“Well, that’s a first.” I smile.
“Come sit with me?”
He takes my arm and puts it through his, laying my hand on his arm and holding it there. We sit at a smaller table next to the large birthday table and I realize that Ian still sort of got his way—it feels like we’re on a mini date here in front of everyone.
After we order, Laila makes her way over to our table and comments on how pretty I look tonight. She’s standing over Ian with her hands on his shoulders as she says it. I compliment her too—she really is so pretty. Ian doesn’t say much, he just watches me. The whole night, he watches me. He’s quieter than usual, but the restaurant is so loud that we both give up trying to have much of a conversation.
It’s the same the next night; there isn’t much chance to have a conversation. I’m happy for the time on the ski lifts during the day where we can learn all about each other.
“So what do you enjoy besides books?” he asks. “You can’t have your nose in a book all the time … can you? I mean, you know I’m all about your sexy librarian vibe, but…”
I roll my eyes at him and say, “Well, every now and then I do something else just as nerdy.”
“No, you have a way of making everything look enticing. You’re like this … Renaissance woman … an odd, but lovely rarity.”
“Do these lines just pour out of you or do you have a running repertoire that you recycle? You’re far too quick for them to be—”
He puts his fingers on my lips and holds them there as his forehead touches mine. “You pull the truth out of me, Sparrow.”
I don’t know what to say to that, especially while his finger is tracing my upper lip that way.
“Tell me something, anything, about you,” he says, moving his finger along the middle of my bottom lip.
“Uh … flute.” Shoot. Why did I let that out?
He leans back, surprised. “Flute? You play the flute? What else do you play?” His eyes narrow as a big grin takes over his face.
“Piano.” I sigh.
“Oh, this is too good. Little Bird is musical. Oh, we’re going to have fun with this,” he vows.
I groan. “No. I’m not playing for you. Ever.”
He gives me a playful hurt look and gets back in my face. “Oh, you will. And I can’t wait…”
I’m still inwardly groaning about that when we go to Wendy’s condo. The thought that I would ever play for Ian Sterling is ridiculous.
Ian and I are on a team together for Pictionary. Jade has gradually gotten the point that Ian isn’t going to be interested in her this trip. She scowls at us as we win. I’m not an artist, but he is, so we are racking up the points. Each time we score, Ian squeezes my hand and looks like he wants to come in for a kiss. He doesn’t. But I wish he would.
Our last day of skiing is bittersweet. I never dreamed I’d come on this trip and actually love it. I’m disappointed at the thought of not being able to ski again for a while. If I’m honest with myself, I’m also slightly heartsick that I will be saying goodbye to Ian tomorrow and I have no idea when or if I’ll see him again. That hasn’t come up in any conversations—the When Will I See You Again? topic. And I’m not going to be the one to broach it.
We run into Lars on our way back to the Lodge. We’ve seen him a few times throughout the week, and it’s been congenial every time. He even skied with all of us one afternoon. He is genuinely a nice guy.
“Sparrow!” he calls. “You headin’ out tomorrow?”
“Yes, I am,” I yell back. “Thanks for showing me how it’s done!” I grin at him.
“Gladly.” He walks closer and does a fist bump with Ian. “Take it easy, man. Hope to see you both out here again.”
I give him a big hug and we go on our way. I’m glad he doesn’t hold any hard feelings. That would have been more awkward than it already was.
The long awaited “date night” arrives. I’ve been fairly relaxed around Ian all week, but being alone with him is a different story. I know how the air is charged enough when we’re around a group of people. He has this way of looking at my mouth that leaves me unhinged. I’ve had the protection of Wendy and even Jade, to keep anything from happening, but land sakes, the way he looks at me … I’m not sure I’ll maintain my virtue.
And the fact is … I’m completely ready to be defiled.
Of course, I dress to kill. My outfits have floored my mom. She just thought she was shocked back home when I finally wore something fitted. Each time she sees me in something else, I think she might have a conniption, but she’s managed to keep her barbs to a minimum—a huge feat on her part. I’m relieved. At least everything I’ve worn is tasteful … but they’re also extremely flattering and ahem, alluring.
I will never wear gunnysacks another day in my life. Never. Ever.
I was right—it does feel different. The air around us is positively popping. From the minute Ian takes a look at me, I know I’m in for something. I’m not quite sure what yet, but something…
As soon as we shut the door, he holds out his hand and laces his fingers through mine. We haven’t done that yet, so I have a little giddy moment inside my chest. We end up at the gondola lift. I’ve been wanting to ride one since we got here, but haven’t had the chance. We climb in and Ian sits on the same side as me. His arm goes around me and I think my heart is going to pound out of my chest. The lights are beautiful, shining down on the snow. The Victorian town of Breckenridge is so quaint and beautiful.
We’re both unusually quiet. All week, we’ve been gabbing each other’s ears off at every opportunity.
“You okay?” I ask.
He raises his hand to my face and cups my jaw. “Look at this face,” he looks like he’s memorizing every feature.
He stares at me and I stare back, until the gondola makes a slight lurch. Our noses bump—why won’t he just kiss me? I can almost feel it, we’re that close.
He looks away and says, “Oh, look, time to get off.” I hear a little bit of relief in his voice and it makes my stomach hurt. Maybe he’s just all talk and isn’t quite feeling what I am for him.
Our lift goes about ten feet further and then stops. We climb out and Ian doesn’t let go of my hand.
Not many hands fit my hands. My fingers are long and slender. Guys with fat hands and short fingers just don’t work with mine. I file this away in my little Perfect Guy for Me Notebook.
Before I know it, we’re going inside a fancy steakhouse. “I hope this is okay. I’ve heard good things about it,” Ian says.
“It sure is pretty.”
“YOU sure are pretty,” he speaks up. “More than pretty…”
He seems nervous again. He pulls out words like ‘sweet’ and ‘pretty’ when he’s nervous. I’m ready to get to the bottom of it.
We’re barely seated and before I can stop the words, I say, “What do you like about me besides my looks?”
“The fact that you would ask me something like that is a clear indication of the kind of person you are, Sparrow Fisher. You have this grounding quality about you. I don’t know a better way to put it. It levels me. I’ve never been at home anywhere, but I am with you.”
I look at him and know exactly what he means. All my life I’ve said what everyone wanted me to say, worn what everyone wanted me to wear, acted just so—never realizing until this very moment that I’ve been waiting for someone to look past it all and actually see me.
“You make me feel like I can completely be myself, Ian. That’s a rare thing for me.”
“I wouldn’t want you to be anyone but yourself,” Ian says with a smile. “Sparrow?” He clears his throat. “I need to ask you something. Or … tell you something…”
Our waitress walks up and I can tell Ian is flustered and wishing she would go away. We hurry and order our drinks.
I wish he’d hold my hand again because he’s making me nervous.
“I’ve been wondering … do you know how old I am?”
I don’t know what I was expecting, but this wasn’t it.
“Well, I guess I assumed you were 22, maybe 23.” I look at his boyish face. I’d actually think he was younger if I didn’t know he’d established quite a music career by now. His face is flawless, no lines whatsoever. If I were to guess without knowing a thing about him, I’d say more like 19 or 20.
He pulls a face and takes his hand away from mine to do that hair tug thing he does. He’s starting to really make me anxious.
“Why? How old are you?” I ask.