by A. J. Pine
He laughed as well. “I always cover up, too, Doc. Not to sound like a broken record, though, but are you sure?”
She nodded. She wasn’t sure about what came next or what damage would be done when they said good-bye in a matter of weeks, but she was sure about this. About him. About tonight.
“Are you?” she asked.
He nodded too.
She cleared her throat and gave his wrist a gentle tug.
He slid his hand from between her legs.
“Then I guess we have an agreement,” she added.
She pressed gently on his shoulder, a silent request for him lie on his back.
“You’re in charge, Doc,” he said with a grin, and she crawled over him, letting him nudge her opening.
He hissed in a breath, and she bit her bottom lip, realizing both of them were throwing self-preservation out the window.
She sank over him, and she gasped as something guttural tore from his chest.
He pressed his strong hands to her hips and lifted her up so she could descend on him again.
“Oh my—” she started. “I mean, this is—”
“I know,” he said. “Come here.”
She lowered herself over him, and he rolled her so they were both on their sides, his leg hooked over hers, and kissed her as their bodies found a rhythm that hadn’t been there before.
Equal ground.
Either they were both in control or neither of them were. She wasn’t entirely sure. All she knew was that everything was better when Ben Callahan was kissing her and that this was something she could do all night long. And other than a break to steal snacks from the kitchen or take a cat nap here and there, that was exactly what they did.
When she woke up, it was nearly 10:00 a.m., and Ben was gone. There was a note on the inn’s stationery, though, resting on top of her pillow.
Hey, Doc. Had an early morning trail ride and didn’t want to wake you. Figured you needed the rest with how hard you’ve been working. I’m off at about 3:00 today. I’d love you to stop by this address if you have the time: 1 County Road. If you need incentive to show up, there’s a whole lot of kissing in it for you.
—Ben
She smiled—a big dopey grin she was glad no one else could see—and pressed the letter to her chest.
She pretended not to think about what would happen in five weeks when she left.
She pretended like they’d be able to keep up the charade—for Pearl and for themselves.
And she pretended she wasn’t falling for her the man she realized had been taking care of her from the moment she stepped foot back in town.
Charlotte liked her life in New York. Maybe it was lacking in family nearby—or a cowboy in her bed—but it was a life she was proud of, and she wouldn’t just walk away from it. She couldn’t. Not without jeopardizing her career.
Eventually, she’d have to walk away from Ben, though, and it would be the hardest thing she’d ever do.
Chapter Fourteen
Ben was grateful for the cooler November temperatures. Made working outside more bearable than summer. But this afternoon, it had already dropped to forty degrees, and it would steadily decline as the sun dipped beyond the horizon. So he needed to get in as much work as possible to get a decent portion of the frame done before they lost daylight.
“I owe you one, buddy,” Ben said to Colt, who was holding a beam of wood in place while Ben manned the nail gun.
Colt laughed. “I’m using my free time to build your house so you can leave me alone in the guest quarters. You owe me a heck of a lot more than one.”
“You name it,” Ben said, securing the final nail and straightening so they could move on to the next part of the frame.
Colt dusted off his hands, then blew into his palms.
“I think it’s time for gloves,” he said. “And as far as cashing in, how about we start by you taking my bonfires the weekend after next. Dr. Murphy has a calf he’s been treating for shipping fever. She’ll be good to head back home by then, but the owner has another heifer close to calving and is afraid to leave her. I could use a long solo drive if you can cover me. I’ll be back by the following Monday in time for Thanksgiving.”
Was it nearing Thanksgiving already? They’d purposely closed the ranch to any bookings for the holiday. With their mom back in the picture, Sam thought it was best the family was together since there was no telling how many more family gatherings were in their future. So the three men were preparing a feast—not that Luis was thrilled about handing over his kitchen, which was why he insisted he and Anna join and help out.
Ben blew out a long breath as he remembered all the nights and weekends his brother and Colt covered for him when he’d been far less considerate as far as asking for the time off.
“Yeah. Sure,” he said to Colt. “You got it. Though I was hoping you were asking for time off for something a little more exciting than four hours in a truck with a calf trailing behind.”
Colt raised his brows. “No calf on the way home. Just me, myself, Northern California out my window, and country music on the radio.”
Ben laughed and shook his head. For all of Colt’s talk about building a house of his own big enough for a whole brood of kids, he seemed so content on his own. Sure, it took time to get over proposing to your girlfriend and having her turn you down, but five years? Nowadays he’d swear his friend preferred his solo existence. Or maybe it was just the easier path. Ben sure as heck wasn’t one to fault another for choosing easy over the possibility of loss. But at least he was trying now—building this house, putting down roots that went deeper than the day-to-day operations of the ranch.
“You got it, friend,” Ben said, holding out his right hand for the two men to make the deal official. “It’s the least I can do.”
Colt laughed again. “You’re right. The very least. And I plan to cash in more when and if I need to. But right now I’m headed to the truck to grab my work gloves. Remind me again why you’re building a house in winter?” he asked as he hopped off the frame and started to back toward the truck.
“It’s not winter yet!” Ben called after him. “November is still considered autumn!”
Colt waved him off and turned toward the truck.
They’d both grown up in Oak Bluff, farther south from Meadow Valley and on the coast. They didn’t see much in the way of winter down there, but Ben liked the change of seasons, something to mark the passage of time, to remind him—especially now—how lucky he was to have another day, another year. His future had infinite possibilities, and he couldn’t help but wonder what that meant for him and Dr. Charlotte North.
“Speak of the devil,” he said to himself as he squinted toward where Colt had parked the truck along the street.
There she was, hopping out of Pearl’s car and staring up the hill to where he stood on one of those infinite possibilities—a home he hoped to share with someone like her.
She strode toward him, hands plunged in the pockets of a short navy-blue coat, her auburn hair bouncing against her shoulders as she quickened her pace.
“This address doesn’t even exist,” she said when he was in earshot. “When I asked one of the nurses at the hospital, he said there’s nothing on this road for miles and miles.”
Ben grinned and hopped onto the grass to greet her, leaving the nail gun behind.
“And yet you found me,” he said. “Wait, why were you at the hospital? Is Pearl okay? Are you okay?”
“Everyone’s fine,” she insisted. “I was checking on Tracy’s new baby girl, Kayla, as a favor to my grandmother. She’s healthy and happy—well, as happy as someone can be who was still in the womb twenty-four hours ago.”
“Look at you being all doctor-ish and stuff,” Ben said, taking a step closer.
She smiled. “Yeah. You know, at first I was a little annoyed at Gran for scheming to get me to do it, but I’ve been so crazed with the inn these past few weeks that I didn’t realize how much I missed my job.
”
He leaned in close and whispered, “Bet you didn’t realize we have all that doctor stuff here in Meadow Valley too.”
She surprised him by taking a step back.
“Whoa. What did I say?” he asked. “I was just teasing you, Doc. That’s what we do, remember?”
But maybe, somewhere beneath the surface, there was a bit of wishful thinking to the comment. Would that be so bad?
“Sorry,” she said. “I didn’t mean to react so strongly. Today, checking on Tracy’s baby? It was wonderful. But it was Pearl setting me up to show me exactly what you just said, as if I didn’t know there were doctors all over the country. But my career is in New York. Even if I wanted to leave—which, right now there’s no reason for me to do that—I can’t. I signed a contract. And I’m happy there.”
Ben nodded. “I never suggested otherwise.”
“I know,” she said. “It was just bad timing, I guess. Felt like maybe you were pressuring me too.”
He swallowed, but his throat was unexpectedly tight, and it felt like trying to choke down a bitter pill without any water. She’d made it abundantly clear that New York was home for her.
And the ranch was home for him.
“No pressure, Doc. I’m not the pressuring type.” He held out a hand, and she threaded her fingers through his. “Now can we try this again?”
She smiled one of those smiles he knew was just for him, and her shoulders relaxed.
When they were like this, he could almost forget that she was leaving, that the first woman he could fall for might also be the first to take a little piece of the heart he’d protected for so long.
“So, why am I here?” she asked.
Over her shoulder, he saw Colt on his phone by the truck. Either he was giving them a minute alone or something had come up. Ben was simply happy for a few minutes with Charlotte before having to explain anything to his friend.
“Okay,” he said, realizing how this would look now. “So, my brother and I, before we moved here and built the ranch, we built other stuff, like houses and barns. Or we did remodeling projects. We’re contractors, basically. And now ranchers.”
She nodded, but he could still tell she was hesitant.
“Back home we lived with and took care of our father, which never quite suited my selfish lifestyle. Nor did visiting him at the facility where he lives now—not when I thought it was where I’d end up in a matter of years.” He cleared his throat. “I never really wanted a place of my own because…I was afraid I didn’t have enough time to enjoy the kind of life you’re supposed to enjoy in a home. So I slept where I could find a bed, and for a lot of years that was enough.” He shrugged. “I’m not exactly proud of who I was, but I’m trying to change.”
“And this is you changing?” she asked, dropping his hand and stepping past him and up to the unfinished frame, running a gloved hand along a freshly nailed beam.
“Now I want all the things I didn’t let myself want. And before you think this is me pressuring you again, I’ve had my eye on this land since we got here over two years ago. Just never thought there was any point in putting down roots—emotionally speaking, of course. What was the sense in building a home when I never thought I’d be filling it with anyone other than myself? Now, I don’t know what the future holds, and for the first time I’m okay with that. But I needed to do something to prove to myself—and to everyone else who thought I wasn’t capable—that I can commit to something. And for now that something is this.”
Would it really be so bad if she saw him in a different light now too? Maybe they were still calling this a game, whatever was happening between them. But that didn’t mean he wanted her to see him as the same selfish ass he was a few weeks ago. He cared what she thought of him, maybe more than he’d like to admit.
She nodded again. “Okay. I guess that makes sense,” she said hesitantly. “Can I…can I see?”
“Yeah,” he said. “There’s not much to see yet.” It was a start though. Ben knew he was good at what he did. But this wasn’t a job. It was his design. His home. His commitment to being a better man. He wanted her to see that, even if it was just the little he’d done so far.
He climbed onto the beginnings of the frame and held out a hand to help her up. She walked past him, inspecting the work they’d done so far before turning back to face him.
“It’s hard to tell what it will look like, but it’s a start. It’ll be slow going since I’m borrowing my labor from the ranch.” He gestured toward Colt at the truck. “I wanted you to see what I do when I’m not leading trail rides or giving riding lessons. Maybe it’s crazy to think it matters, but I feel like you had this notion of me in your head when we first met, and you were probably right about a lot of it.”
She pursed her lips. “What is it you think I thought of you?”
He raised a brow. “That I was maybe…irresponsible. That I was definitely selfish. That the only commitment I had was to the ranch, and even that was shaky at best. I guess I just wanted to show you something you didn’t know.”
She took the few steps to close the distance between them and shook her head.
“It’s not crazy. It’s— I’m glad you wanted to share this with me. You’re building a home. It’s wonderful. Whoever gets to share it with you is very lucky.”
She blew out a shaky breath and wrapped her arms around his waist. He let his forehead fall against hers.
There it was. The reality that it wouldn’t be her.
“Why the hell do you have to live in New York?” he asked, trying to tease but knowing he was failing miserably.
“Why the hell do you have to live in California?” she asked right back.
And why did it even matter when neither was willing to admit this was anything more than pretend?
“I know my grandmother’s not anywhere close to where we are and that she can’t see us…” she said with the hint of a smile.
But Ben didn’t want to finish her thought. If she wanted to do what she was hinting at, she had to say it so he was sure. So he furrowed his brow, stepped back, and crossed his arms.
“I don’t follow, Doc,” he said, fighting the urge to grin.
Charlotte rolled her eyes. “Yes, you do,” she insisted. “I thought our little arrangement said something about our comings and goings, about how a man might greet a woman he’s dating.”
His expression remained impassive.
She groaned. “Colt is still over by the truck. He might see us not doing what he thinks we should be doing, and…and then what if he reports back to my grandmother?”
Ben raised his brows.
“Are you suggesting that Mr. Morgan might blow our cover if we don’t do—I don’t know—something to make him think we’re an item?” he asked innocently. “Because I’d hate to invite you out here only to ruin everything we’ve done to make this thing between us look rock solid.”
“You know, I was ready to kiss you to make up for reacting harshly when you first showed me the house. But now I don’t think you deserve it,” she said, clearly annoyed.
He finally cracked a smile and let loose a soft chuckle.
“You’re so easy to rile up, Doc. You know that?”
She jutted out her chin. “If you don’t want to kiss me, all you have to do is say so.” Then she spun on her heel. But she wasn’t fast enough.
He grabbed her hand, and she turned back to face him, unable to hide a smile of her own.
“I don’t take kindly to teasing, Mr. Callahan,” she chided.
He laughed. “I forgot you’re an only child. See, with me and Sam, teasing is how we— I mean, growing up it was— And now…”
Jesus. He had no clue how to use words to express that she meant something to him, even if there was no definition for what they were.
She sighed. “I care about you, too, cowboy. Now lay one on me already.”
Saved by the kiss.
Because when his lips touched hers, he didn’t have to
think of the right thing to say. He could simply pull her close and hope she understood that teasing or no, he always wanted to kiss her. And if she wanted to use the prying eyes of Colt or Pearl or anyone in town as the reason to do it, far be it from him to disagree.
His phone buzzed in his back pocket, and he reluctantly broke away from her to check the message.
Speak of the devil.
Colt: Looks like you don’t need me anymore today. Mind if I head back and you can get a ride from the doctor?
Ben quickly responded with Sure. Thanks again, and thought that would be the end of it, but then he saw those telltale three dots that said Colt wasn’t done with the conversation.
Colt: Just friends, huh?
Right. He hadn’t exactly told his brother or Colt that they were dating. Or pretending they were dating. Because the last thing any of the men at the Meadow Valley Ranch cared about was who was kissing whom or whether or not Pearl believed their charade.
But maybe he’d better play it safe. For Charlotte’s sake, of course.
“What is it?” Charlotte asked as Ben just stared at his screen.
“Nothing. Colt needs to head back to the ranch. Think you can give me a ride after I clean up here?”
Ben wouldn’t be completing the frame today, but he was suddenly in no rush to get to the finish line. Even after their kiss, her words still echoed in his head.
Whoever gets to share it with you is very lucky.
The only problem was that when he pictured the completed house, he kept imagining her in it, which was ridiculous. That was never going to happen.
“Sure,” she said, interrupting his thoughts. “I can drive you back.”
He nodded and texted Colt back one more time.
Yes. Friends. Sort of. But if anyone asks, we’re dating.
Colt: Who’s going to ask?
Ben: No one. I don’t know. Pearl, okay?
Three dots appeared to let Ben know Colt had more to say on that matter.
Colt: So you’re lying to Pearl or to yourself? Or both? Either way, my friend, be careful.