by K. Aten
Sarah gave her a puzzled look and licked her lips. When she tasted the blood she smiled at her lover reassuringly. “It’s okay, I’ve done as much myself on occasion.” She looked into worried blue eyes. “Really, it’s all right.” Changing the mood she covered her eyes with the back of her hand. Still shaky, she blew out a breath. “God! That was unbelievable, the things you do to me.”
Keller wanted desperately to wake next to the singer in the morning. “Will you stay the night with me?”
Sarah removed her hand and slowly looked at the smaller woman lying beside her. She let her heart answer unconditionally. “Yeah.”
A look of intense joy flickered across Keller’s face before she quickly hid it. She got up to blow out the candles then came back to bed. Sarah was nearly asleep when Keller gently pulled the taller woman to her. The singer fell asleep with her head cradled tenderly on her lover’s shoulder.
Chapter Five
LATE THE NEXT morning Sarah woke to find Keller gone. The revelation was followed by the tantalizing smells of coffee and breakfast. She found a single rose on the pillow next to her and a note. “Toiletries are next to the sink. Breakfast is ready when you are.” She smiled and slipped on the robe at the end of the bed. When she finished cleaning up, she made her way to the kitchen. Keller had just placed a stack of bacon on a plate and was mixing the ingredients for omelets. Her face lit up when Sarah sat down at the breakfast nook. She walked over and gave her a gentle kiss on the lips. “What would you like in your omelet?” When Sarah didn’t answer for a moment, she added worriedly, “You do like omelets, don’t you?”
Sarah laughed at the other woman’s uncharacteristic nervousness. “Yes I do, I’ll have whatever you’ve got there.”
They ate quietly when the food was ready. When Keller took care of the plates, Sarah took her coffee mug over to the large windows and stared toward the river. A few minutes later Keller walked up carrying her own mug. “Any plans today?”
“Not really, no. I need to hunt for some studio rental space. I think I’ve settled on the idea of giving private music instruction. Why?” When she turned toward Keller, she stared alarmingly at the sunlight streaming across Keller’s face. “Doesn’t that hurt you?”
“No. For one thing, I can stand being in the sunlight. My body will heal any damage done. It will sap my strength fairly quickly though if I don’t take precautions.” She laughed, “I could stand on the beach wearing nothing but a smile but it would take an enormous amount of energy. However—” She waved a hand toward the windows. “—these are treated to block UVA and UVB rays, the same as my office at the club, and a lot of vehicles for that matter. I’m safe, don’t worry.” She finished her coffee and walked over to rinse the mug in the sink. Sarah followed her and did the same.
Sarah gave her a strange look. “Speaking of cars, why do you drive a convertible if the sun is so damaging?”
The shorter woman laughed. “Truthfully? I love convertibles. Mostly I only put the top down on hot summer nights but occasionally I’ll chance it during the day. Call it one of my guilty pleasures.”
The singer smirked. “I’m sure you have many others. Do you mind if I take a shower?”
“Of course not, I’ll get you some towels. If you’d like, I think I have some oversize sweats and a t-shirt you can wear home.”
“Thank you.” In a promise that held more than one meaning, she added, “Don’t worry, I’ll bring them back.”
Keller grinned, accepting the statement for what it was. “Sure, maybe we can work out a trade.”
“Any time hot stuff, any time.”
Keller licked her lips and watched the singer head for the shower. She called out, “I’m going to run down and get the paper. Be right back, okay?”
From the other room, “All right, I’ll save you some hot water—then again if you’re fast enough we can share!”
Keller ran out the door. When she came back, she threw the paper on the counter then joined Sarah in the shower. They spent nearly an hour under the water. Long enough to get clean then dirty and clean again.
Once they were dressed, they made their way back to the kitchen. Keller fetched a small duffle bag from the closet for Sarah’s clothes. Sarah saw the morning paper sitting near the edge of the counter. She flipped it over to read the front page and gasped. “Oh my God!” She covered her mouth with her hand.
Keller turned around and saw Sarah’s face pale. She dropped the bag and rushed over. “What is it?”
Sarah pointed at the front page and Keller read the headline aloud. “Club Diversity employee found dead in back alley, the latest attack in a series of hate crimes downtown.” Keller sat on the stool next to Sarah, dumbfounded.
“Keller, that’s horrible, they’ve got to do something!”
The bar manager shook her head back and forth, mind already racing about the new precautions The Merge would have to take. “There’s nothing they can do without any leads. They don’t even have a description of the vehicle that keeps running people down.” She stood and started pacing. “I’m going to have to tighten security again at the club. There is no way one of our people is going to be hurt, I’ll close first!”
Sarah stood and put a comforting hand on Keller’s arm, stopping the agitated woman. “It’s going to be all right.”
Keller turned and grabbed Sarah’s arms in a strong grip. “Promise me—” She shook her a little, focusing on green eyes. “Promise me you’ll be safe.”
“Of course. What about you?”
“I’ll be all right, you don’t have to worry about me. I can protect myself.”
“You said it yourself, you’re not immortal. Don’t be foolish, Keller, too many people depend on you and care about you.”
“Including you?”
Sarah looked away from those penetrating blue eyes. She took the easy way out once again and chose to run away. “I have to go.” She took one last look at the other woman before walking out the door. The scene was already familiar to both women. “I’ll see you around Keller. Take care of yourself—” She whispered quietly as the door closed behind her. “—for me.”
MORE THAN TWO weeks had passed since the murder. Keller spent every moment from open to close at the bar. Only one more attack had occurred but she worried continuously about her employees’ safety. She hired two more security people for outside the bar and had cameras installed that monitored the entire outside perimeter. Many hours were spent in front of the screens in her office. No one was allowed to leave the bar alone and community watches were organized around the downtown area. The manager barely slept, barely ate, and barely saw Sarah. She had spoken to Annie on numerous occasions and from what the younger woman said, her sister was very busy trying to get her instruction studio off the ground. Sarah had only come home with her twice since Annie’s graduation. It wasn’t nearly enough. Keller was taxing her resources considerably and the few visits from her lover weren’t enough to rejuvenate her. She was getting weak and she knew it. Noble Keller had no way of telling how long she could keep up the pace.
It was a Tuesday night when the police finally got a break in the case. The Wednesday papers reported an older model truck had tried to run two twenty-something men off the road near a gay café. A pencil sketch of the vehicle was on the front page but no one had reported seeing it since. Keller was at her desk when Annie walked in.
“Keller, did you see—” She stopped when she saw the open paper on the desk. “Oh, I guess you have.” She walked over to the desk and looked closer at her boss. “Keller, when is the last time you ate, or even slept for that matter?”
Keller distractedly traced one of the indentations on her desktop. “Uh, yesterday I think.” She waved a hand at her in dismissal. “Thank you for your concern, Annie, but I’m fine. Oh, and will you tell Lynne that I’ll take her shift tomorrow if she still wants me to?”
Annie began to protest then changed her mind. “Sure, Keller, I
’ll let her know.” She walked out, leaving the other woman deep in thought. She was worried about her sister and Keller. Keller was spending too much time working, not taking care of herself. And Sarah had withdrawn into herself, spending all her time trying to get her business off the ground. Neither had been making any moves toward having a real relationship. She had talked to Jesse about the situation but neither one of them could come up with a solution. They would just have to wait it out.
SARAH WAS STILL trying to fight the inevitable. She would stay away from Keller as long as possible until the need became too great. What she feared was what she most wanted. The more time she spent with Keller, the more she needed to. Trying to keep her distance was tearing her in two. Another week went by since the write up in the paper with the vehicle description. Unable to take it any longer, Sarah found herself going into Keller’s condo one night. Keller wasn’t home so she sat down at the piano. She lost herself for a long time, just playing anything that came to mind. She hadn’t written any new music for more than a month and suddenly she felt the urge to do something, anything. She retrieved the duffle bag that she had left by the door then sat on the couch. Taking out a tablet and pen, she stared down at the blank paper. Almost as if a switch were thrown, the words began to pour out of her. Like blood from an open wound, each sentence was a catharsis. She emptied everything her body could possibly hold onto the page. All the anger, passion, and pain were there for the world to see. Feeling raw and drained of energy, Sarah finished and lay back on the couch, clutching the notebook tightly. She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep, knowing the melody would come eventually.
Keller entered later after closing the bar and seeing her employees safely out. She was surprised to see the light on in the living room but instinctively knew who it was. She walked over and gazed down at the sleeping woman. The soft light gave her the face of an angel, or maybe it was the soft expression on her face. Unable to resist, she stroked the dark hair fanned out across the leather. Her actions woke the slumbering woman and green eyes peered up into her own. She smiled tenderly at the gift below her. “Hi.”
Sarah smiled in return. “Hi, yourself. Everything go okay tonight?”
“Yeah, everything was fine.” She continued the small talk, wanting nothing more than to take the other woman into her arms. “How are things going with your new business?”
“They’re good. I’m pretty sure I have a place lined up. I also have fliers up and I have been advertising through word of mouth. I’m hoping to be able to start lessons within the month.”
Keller was silent for a moment, and then she walked around the couch and knelt in front of Sarah. She carefully placed the notebook on the coffee table. When Sarah began to speak, Keller placed two fingers over her soft lips. “Shh.” In a show of strength belying her small stature, Keller picked her up and carried her to the bedroom. She spent the rest of the night pouring out her own heart. The words spoken by strong hands were silent as the ones on the page but the message was the same. All Sarah had to do was look and she would see the love written in the blue eyes gone black with desire.
Keller woke alone, once again. The silence of her empty home was deafening. She felt like her heart was breaking and there was nothing she could do. The night of passion left her feeling marginally better but it was not enough to keep up with the energy she was expending. She needed Sarah more than anything in her entire life. The singer was the key to her heart and without her, she would die. Keller clutched the pillow used by her lover and inhaled the scent of her. She gave a single hoarse cry then curled around the soft reminder and wept. The tears were nothing less than the blood of her broken heart.
Five stories below in a nearby parking lot, Sarah was pounding her anger out onto the steering wheel of her RAV4. The outlet was different but the tears she cried were exactly the same.
When Sarah returned home, Annie was busy eating her lunch and reading the paper. Sarah stole a chip from her sister’s plate and the younger woman half-heartedly protested. “Hey, get your own!” Sarah grabbed a soda from the fridge and the bag of potato chips from the cupboard. Annie looked at her fondly, taking note of the red rimmed eyes. Lightly, she asked, “Where have you been, anyone interesting?”
Using the same light tone, Sarah replied, “Oh, you know, just the usual.”
Annie smirked. “So how was Keller?”
“How is Jesse?”
Annie immediately blushed. It had only been a little over a week since Annie and Jesse had taken their relationship to the next level. Since the younger couple had successfully made it past third base, Annie had been insatiable. Sarah had walked in on their passionate displays on more than one occasion.
Annie smacked her on the arm for her teasing. She grinned at her older sister then got serious. “Actually, there is something I’ve wanted to talk to you about.”
Sarah took a drink and grabbed another chip. “Go ahead then, spill it. What did you do now?”
Annie swallowed nervously. “It’s not what I did, it’s what I want to do.” She went on quickly. “You see, Jesse’s lease is up in another month and I was thinking about asking her to move in here with us.”
Sarah’s eyebrows shot up. “Really? Do you think it’s too soon for that? What does Jesse say?”
“Well, I haven’t actually talked to her about it yet. I wanted to talk to you first to make sure that it’s okay.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I didn’t want to get her hopes up or anything.”
Sarah thought for a minute, rolling the idea around in her head. It was only a two-bedroom house but there was plenty of room in the full size basement for storage. Besides, she really did like Jesse. She was coming to think of her as another sister of sorts. She looked at Annie intently. “Is this what you really want, Annie, is it worth the risk?”
Annie didn’t need any time at all to answer. “Yes it is. Sarah, I want to wake up with her every single morning, not just the days we have ‘sleepovers’. I want to see more of her. I want to be able to watch TV with her, do the dishes together, and fall asleep holding each other every night.” She blushed. “That sounds stupid, doesn’t it?”
Sarah smiled. “Not at all, it sounds like you’re in love.”
“Yeah, I guess I am. It’s just—it’s like the most incredible feeling I’ve ever had!” She looked sadly at her sister and confidante. “I just wish you could feel the same thing.”
“Well, maybe love is something that I’m not meant to find.”
“Maybe…” Annie let the comment slide and decided to change the subject instead. “Hey, something has been bothering me.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Have you noticed anything odd about Keller, anything unexplainably strange?”
Sarah did her best to keep a straight face. Her sister was obviously very perceptive if she was noticing things that Keller had been keeping hidden for years. She hated lying to Annie about anything but it wasn’t her secret to tell. “No, nothing. Why do you ask?”
Annie was watching Sarah closely as she answered. Sarah would never make a good poker player, her face gave everything away. The younger Colby sister could easily see that there was something going on with Keller, and Sarah knew about it. Interesting. Annie decided that she still had to voice her concerns. “I don’t know if you have noticed but she hasn’t been looking very well lately.” At Sarah’s worried glance she added, “She has been working every day and night for weeks. She’s going to burn herself out if she doesn’t slow down and get some rest.”
Taken off guard, Sarah attempted to speak but no words came out. She was instantly struck with overwhelming guilt for not noticing anything wrong. She had been so focused on her own life that she had not been paying attention to much else. “Wha— um, what’s—” She stopped, and then started again. “What can I do? I mean, she’s an adult. I can’t tell her what to do.”
“Could you just talk to her please? Try to get her to take a day o
ff. We’ll be fine at the bar without her for a night.” Annie gave her a pleading look. “We’ve been friends for a while and she hasn’t been talking to me at all lately. I’m really worried about her, Sarah.”
Sarah got up, put the chips away, and tossed her can in the recycling bin. Without making eye contact, she agreed to help. “I’ll talk to her and see what I can do.”
Annie stood and took care of her own dishes. “Thank you, it means a lot to me.”
IT WAS FRIDAY night and it had been a little over a week since Sarah had made her promise to Annie. She had been putting it off because she was afraid to see if there really was something wrong with Keller. She didn’t want to know if she would feel anything, if Keller had made it past the barrier around her heart. She arrived at The Merge around nine p.m. Her reasoning was that it wouldn’t be too busy to talk but she could still possibly meet up with some friends later. When she walked through the door, there were a few early birds paying the cover charge and getting their ID’s scanned. Teddy waved her through at no charge, one of the benefits of knowing the right people. Sarah wanted to grab a drink then find Keller and get the discussion over with as soon as possible.
When she walked up to the bar, she was pleasantly surprised to see one of her oldest and closest friends, Jill. The two women had lost touch when she went on tour and Sarah missed hanging out with her. Jill was a little taller than she was and had long red hair with a model’s face. Sarah slapped the redhead’s ass while she was waiting to order. The woman turned around with angry blue eyes flashing. “Hey!” She stopped in surprise and threw her arms around Sarah. “Oh my God, look at you!” They hugged for a full minute, and then Jill pulled back and looked at the singer. Licking her lips, she gave Sarah a naughty smile. “Lover, you get sexier every time I see you.” Boldly, she caressed Sarah’s bottom lip before leaning in and kissing her passionately. Tongues dueled until the need for air broke the two women apart. Unseen by both, another set of angry blue eyes watched from across the bar. After witnessing the heated display of affection, Keller stalked back to her office and slammed the door. Jill wrapped an arm around Sarah’s waist affectionately. “Whew, girl, I think I need a drink after that!” The both laughed and leaned shoulder to shoulder at the bar. Sarah was glad of the unexpected interruption to her plans. It had been a frustrating week of soul searching and she was still feeling a little emotionally raw. She wasn’t ready to face Noble Keller and her heartbreaking stare. When the two women got their drinks, they sat in a booth as far from the dance floor as possible so they could talk. Jill gave her another heated look from across the table. “Look at you! I haven’t seen you in—” She wrinkled her eyebrows in thought and Sarah answered for her.