by Ali Parker
I parked like a moron at the airport. My car hung over the white painted line into the space next to mine, and a woman in a royal-blue fall coat shot me a menacing glare that might have stopped me in my tracks if I wasn’t in such a hurry. She muttered something to the woman she was with, presumably a sister or cousin based on their likeness, who nodded along that yes, I was quite the asshole.
At least those were the words I applied to their moving lips.
My shoes clapped against the pavement as I rushed down the walkway to the airport. My shoulder clipped strangers who hollered classic New Yorker insults after me.
“Watch where you’re going, prick!”
“Bastard!”
“Pay attention to where you’re going!”
“You could’ve killed me, asshole!”
They were all exaggerated, of course. I wasn’t a linebacker trying to bowl strangers over in the middle of the field. I did my best to avoid people as I ran headlong to the check-in counter. People shot me irritated looks as I stood in line shifting my weight from one foot to the other.
I knew Briar was already on a plane and I couldn’t stop her flight. That wasn’t the goal here. The goal was to catch my own flight and catch up with her in North Carolina. I couldn’t reach her by phone and I didn’t want to wait for her to land so we could have our conversation. This needed to happen in person.
This was that moment in the book I always itched to get to. One lover had to make a big grand gesture to the other and there was always no telling how it was going to go. Would they reconcile? Would it be too late? Had too much damage been done for them to come back together and make things work?
As the line inched closer to the check-in counter, I wished I had answers to those questions. In my books, I always did. I knew how it was all going to end. I’d manicured it to come to the conclusion I wanted. Briar was not one of my characters. I couldn’t control whether she would forgive me or not.
It didn’t matter.
I was done sitting around waiting for the perfect girl to come along. There was no such thing. Briar had made a mistake. And so had I. This was real life, not a book, and the sharp pain that came along with her mistake had been a painful reminder that I was very much alive.
Pain came with joy. When did I forget that? When did I forsake genuine human emotions and experiences? Why had I let my fear consume me to such an extent?
And why had I let the best thing that ever happened to me go at the first sign of trouble?
“Because you’re a fool,” I muttered to myself.
The man in line ahead of me gave me a curious look over his shoulder.
“Not you,” I said hurriedly. “Me.”
He shrugged, clearly not interested, and returned his attention to his phone screen.
Finally, it was my chance to go up to the counter. The airline employee, a tall, thin, mousy-haired woman with purple glasses and a matching scrunchie in her hair, smiled pleasantly at me. “Good morning, sir. May I please see your boarding pass and ID?”
“I don’t have one.”
She frowned.
“I’d like to buy a ticket,” I said. “Your first flight to North Carolina please. Whatever airport is closest to Waynesville.”
The woman, whose name tag read Heidi, pursed her lips and clicked away on her computer. “It’s not very often people show up to buy a ticket the old-fashioned way anymore. Bear with me a moment.”
“Take your time,” I said. In reality, I wanted to scream at her to hurry up.
I resisted the urge to drum my fingers on the counter.
“Ah yes, here we go,” Heidi said in a well-rehearsed customer-service voice. “The soonest available flight is a direct flight to Asheville, North Carolina. It leaves in an hour and fifteen minutes and is roughly twenty-five miles from Waynesville. Would you like to purchase a ticket?”
“Yes.”
“Your direct flight to Asheville at eleven twenty is two hundred and two dollars. How would you like to pay for that today, sir?”
I slid her my credit card and showed her my ID. Buying a ticket at the airport wasn’t as quick and seamless as it was online. In total, it took about eight minutes. Heidi was concerned that I didn’t need to purchase a return ticket and didn’t have any luggage with me, so I explained why I was flying to North Carolina in the first place.
At the end of my tale, I added, “So really there’s a good chance I’m going to fly right back here if she slams the door in my face and tells me she wants nothing to do with me. In that case, I’ll just buy another ticket there and fly back.”
Heidi beamed at me as she printed my ticket. “I’ve always hoped to be part of someone else’s love story one day. Here you are. Good luck, Mr. Parker. I highly doubt she’ll turn her back on you after you hopped on a plane and chased after her. You’re quite literally every woman’s dream come true.”
I clutched the ticket to my chest. “I wouldn’t go that far. I’m also the reason she left in the first place.”
Heidi gave me a knowing smile. “Then I suggest you show up at her door with chocolates and flowers, Mr. Parker.”
I patted the counter gratefully. “You’re a lifesaver, Heidi. Thank you!”
I pushed off the counter as she called “You’re welcome” after me and made for the security check point. I made it through effortlessly and made my way to the gate, where I waited like a child waiting in line to sit on Santa’s lap.
The anticipation was killing me.
What if this went terribly wrong? What if Briar was furious with me for making her walk home the other night? What if she’d come to her senses and realized she wanted no part of my anonymous, drama ridden, fear-of-being-a-famous-author lifestyle?
What if she decided New York wasn’t for her and she preferred the charm of her small hometown?
I raked my fingers through my hair and collapsed into one of the black leather chairs outside my gate.
What would I say to her when I caught up to her? Was there an apology good enough to earn her trust back? At this point, I felt like I was the one who had apologizing to do, and she had forgiven me. Sure, she’d slipped up with my name to a co-worker and there were going to be repercussions for that, but I’d way rather face those and have her by my side than keep my anonymity and live without her.
I loved her.
Plain and simple.
And I wasn’t going to let her go this easily. With any luck, she wouldn’t want to let me go either.
Chapter 31
Briar
On the other side of the closed door of my old bedroom and down the hall, I could hear Riley and Madison talking quietly in the kitchen. I knew they were talking about me and my sudden return, most likely theorizing about all the gritty details of what went wrong and how I hadn’t been able to hack it in New York City, just like they always thought I never would.
It turned out they were right.
New York City broke my heart in half like it was snapping a dry, weak, thin, frail twig.
Snap.
Part of me knew I was blaming an entire city for the hurt that a single man had caused, but I wasn’t quite willing to admit that the only man I’d ever fallen in love with had kicked me to the curb, almost literally.
The fact that I’d hurt him first didn’t make this any easier. The guilt was crippling. I thought when I got back to Waynesville that some of the guilt might have begun to ebb away. I was sorely mistaken. The distance and change of scenery did nothing to make me feel less shitty for spilling the beans to Callie and potentially jeopardizing Wes’s hard-earned privacy.
A knock on the door made me wipe fresh tears away. “Come in.”
Riley opened the door wide enough to poke her head in my room. She smiled at me. “It’s up to you if you want some more time to yourself, but Madison and I are going to sit on the sofa and eat spring rolls and cheese and crackers. We have some of that jelly you like so much. Want to join us?”
I nodded.
&
nbsp; Sitting around by myself wasn’t making me feel any better.
I got up from the edge of the bed and followed Riley down the hall to the living room, where Madison was setting up a smorgasbord of food on the ottoman/coffee table. It smelled like Thai dipping sauce and Chinese food, which I knew was just the spring rolls which were fresh out of the oven and perfectly crispy on the outsides. I took a seat on the sofa before sliding off of it to sit on the floor with my legs out in front of me and the sofa at my back.
The girls sat around the ottoman and began picking at the food.
I hadn’t eaten all day and my hunger pangs had finally caught up with me. I knew I needed to eat something and it would probably make me feel better. My heart might be empty, but my belly didn’t have to be.
“How are you feeling?” Madison asked.
“Embarrassed.”
Madison and Riley shared a look.
Riley leaned over and put her hand on my shin. “Why do you feel embarrassed, babe?
I shrugged and crammed half a spring roll in my mouth. “Because,” I said weakly, “I failed. New York was supposed to be my future. I never imagined a scenario where I’d come back here unless it was to visit you guys or my family. Like for the holidays or something. But I hardly made it two weeks. I’m a big fat failure.”
“Don’t say that,” Madison said.
“You’re not a failure,” Riley said. “Some dreams are just really big, babe. Too big. There’s nothing wrong with admitting you aimed a little too high. But look at it this way. Now you get to pick a new dream and we can all stay together here in Waynesville. That’s not so bad, right?”
My chest tightened. “I guess not.”
Riley laughed dryly. “Way to make us feel special.”
“I’m sorry.”
Madison waved it off. “You need to grieve in order to move on. Don’t be sorry. Maybe when you’re ready, Riley and I can finally talk to our boss at Strut and see if there’s room to bring you onto the team. I know you’d really like it. Everyone’s really nice and funny. It’s a good place to work. You’ll see.”
“Yeah, maybe,” I said.
I never pictured myself working at a place like Strut but maybe my friends were right. Maybe that was the best place for me here. I’d get a good discount on clothes. I could rebuild my closet while I rebuilt my life.
Didn’t every girl dream of doing that at least once?
I helped myself to more snacks. “I’m sorry I’m taking back the room. I hope you guys didn’t have anyone planning on moving in.”
“Nope,” Riley said, shaking her head. “We didn’t put it out there that we needed a new roommate.”
“We were kind of hoping you’d come back,” Madison said.
“We figured we might have to wait a bit longer than two weeks, but hey, it’s good we didn’t fill it, right? Now you can settle back in like nothing ever happened.”
“Yeah,” I said. “Like nothing ever happened.”
But things had happened.
Wonderful things happened.
I stayed alone in a less than mediocre motel. I fought throngs of strangers to find a job. I got hired. I made friends at work. I found a roommate I clicked with.
And I found a man I cared about.
How could I just dismiss all that? Sure, it had only been two weeks, but in that time, I’d truly felt like I’d built a solid foundation to build up from.
Had I made a mistake getting on that plane this morning and running away?
My stomach churned and I put my plate down, not interested in any more spring rolls or snacks.
Kraken came around the corner of the sofa with a chirping meow and wandered over to Madison, his proud tail sticking straight in the air. She ran her hand over his back and gave him a scratch behind the ears before the cat curled up in her lap.
He did not purr. He wasn’t the purring sort of cat. He just lay there and slow-blinked at me.
“Do you think maybe it’s time we finally paint the living room?” Riley asked, looking around. “Now that we’re all back together again, maybe we should have a painting party this weekend. We’ve always talked about it. Why not go for it?”
I wasn’t in the mood for a painting party.
“I’m game,” Madison said.
My friends looked expectantly at me.
“Sure,” I said, my voice sounding hollow in my own ears.
“Try not to sound so excited.” Madison chuckled.
The pair of them launched into a discussion about what color we should paint the living room while my mind wandered back to Wes.
I wondered what he was up to right then. I assumed he was probably at home, perhaps sitting on his sofa with a glass of wine contemplating how he was going to handle Kelly Green. Could he stop her from writing an article about him, I wondered?
I thought about how badly I wished I was back in his townhome with him standing in his kitchen cooking. I yearned to crawl into his bed and feel the warmth of his body against mine. I ached to feel him pull me against him, hold my face in his hands, and promise that he forgave me wholly and fully and he wanted nothing more than for us to just be us.
My throat tightened and I swallowed back emotions I didn’t dare let escape right now. As soon as the waterworks started, I’d never be able to get them to stop.
“What do you think, babe?” Riley asked, turning to me.
I blinked up at her. “I’m sorry. What did you ask me?”
Riley planted her hands on her hips and cocked her head to the side. “Are you even paying any attention?”
I cleared my throat. “I’m a little distracted.”
“Paint colors,” Riley said. “We’re talking about paint colors. I suggested navy on the fireplace wall which I think would look so good and crisp with the white baseboards. Madison thinks we should do a burnt-orange color. We could always do a wallpaper feature wall, too. What do you think?”
I don’t care. “Wallpaper is a lot of work,” I said.
“What about a forest green?” Madison asked excitedly as she got to her feet and stood beside Riley. The pair of them studied the fireplace wall like they were interior designers. Realistically, they had no idea what they were doing.
They went back and forth about colors and I watched them quietly.
Then someone knocked on the apartment door.
The girls fell silent and looked over their shoulders at the door.
“Did you order something?” Riley asked me.
I shook my head.
“I didn’t either,” Madison said.
“I’ll get it.” I pushed up to my feet and padded barefoot past the kitchen to the front door. I could have looked through the peephole, but I assumed it was a neighbor asking to borrow sugar or a hammer or something. That kind of thing happened a lot in this apartment complex.
It was not one of our neighbors.
I found myself staring at Wes.
He stood on the threshold with his hands in his pockets and an unsure smile playing on his lips. My heart skipped a beat at the sight of him and I tried to speak but no words came.
“Hey,” he said softly. “Do you have a minute?”
Yes.
I still couldn’t speak, so I simply nodded.
Riley and Madison rallied around me.
“Is this the guy?” Madison asked sharply, giving Wes a sweeping up-down look.
“What are you doing here?” Riley asked sharply
Wes’s gaze flicked briefly to my friends. “I have to speak with Briar. Privately.”
Riley puffed out her chest like a mating bird. “Whatever you have to say to Briar, you can say in front of us.”
My cheeks burned with horror.
Wes arched an eyebrow. “Fine.” He straightened and turned his full and undivided attention on me. His gaze was intense and sharp, and I found myself wishing I could lean into him. I wished that we were alone. “Briar, I regret how I handled things when you told me about your co-worker and th
e journalist. I reacted out of impulse. I was angry and confused, and I felt betrayed. I took it personally and I blamed you for a lot of things other people have done to me in the past. And that wasn’t fair of me.”
My heart raced and my chest swelled. Was this really happening? Had he flown all the way out here to tell me this?
“I went to your apartment this morning to apologize but Sonia told me you came home. I never wanted to chase you away, Briar. I want you as close to me as possible. I’ve changed for the better since I met you. I like who I am with you. And I don’t want to hide anymore. I want to plant my feet and tell the world who I am and make it clear what I want.”
My voice trembled, but I finally managed to speak. “And what is it that you want, Wes?”
“Isn’t that obvious?” he whispered.
I shook my head.
He stepped toward me. “You, Briar. I want you.”
Chapter 32
Wes
Briar’s friends hovered over both her shoulders like two little devils. Not one angel and one devil. Two devils. They looked at me like they wanted to take a bite out of me—or push me down the stairs. Meanwhile, Briar stood with her arms hanging slack at her sides staring at me like she’d seen a ghost.
Albeit, a ghost she was happy to see.
I hoped.
Briar inched closer to the silver strip separating the hallway carpet from the hardwood floors of the apartment. “You came all this way to tell me that?”
I nodded. I was still out of breath from the mad dash up the stairs to her unit, and I had no intention of telling her how many neighbors’ doors I’d knocked on trying to track her down. When I’d knocked on this door, I hadn’t even known if she was going to answer it or if I had more floors to climb and more doors to bang upon.
Lucky for me, the search was over.
“I didn’t want to do this over the phone,” I said.
Her friends leaned backward so they could whisper between themselves. Briar either didn’t hear them or she deliberately ignored them.
“I thought you’d never want to see me again,” she said.