That was it? He wasn’t going to storm out? “So…we’re okay?”
“I was the one who went for it when I already knew you were seeing someone. Idiotic to assume there would be no consequences for stealing someone’s girl.”
“I was never his girl.” I was always Dex’s girl, from the beginning, from the day I met him.
His eyes slowly softened as he looked at me, that intense expression coming into his gaze, his shoulders becoming less rounded and rigid. Then he stepped over to me, his arms circling my waist, his head dropping to mine, his hands squeezing me close with that sexy, masculine grip. “You aren’t my girl either. You’re my woman.”
My arms circled his neck, and I felt that flush of passion, infatuation, even a little desperation. He made my heart race without stepping on the treadmill, made me feel deep longing, separation pains even when he was just five feet away from me. He gave me a kind of rush I’d never known, made me realize this was the first time I’d ever truly been in love. I’d give anything to tell him that, even if he didn’t say it back.
“You’re a good cook.” He lay beside me in bed, gloriously naked, having the perfect eight-pack, carved pecs, and sexy arms covered in veins and beautiful skin. He had my thigh hiked over his waist, his fingertips trailing circles on the skin, his waist covered by the sheet.
My arm was draped over his stomach, and my face was on his shoulder, looking at him, occasionally tracing my fingertips over his coarse shadow. “I’m glad you liked it.”
“So not only do you give the best head ever, but you also make some pretty damn good food.”
“Not as good as my mama’s pie, though.”
“But you taste like pie.” Only he could pull off a line like that, look me in the eye as he commented on the taste of my sex, when his mouth had been pressed there for nearly an hour, making me come over and over again.
Fooling around was satisfying, but I wanted more, though he was obviously not ready to take it there. But what we had right then, us cuddled together, was more satisfying than any sex he could give me.
Because it was just us.
He continued to massage my thigh, dragging his callused fingers over my skin, probably because he had to scrub his hands for surgery all the time, plus when he was working in the lab, and then at the office he was either typing or scribbling notes.
I couldn’t believe this was real, that Dex was beside me, looking at me the way I looked at him, in a way I could only imagine in my dreams. When I’d put myself out there and he rejected me, it stung, but it also gave me the closure I needed to move on.
But all I really did was lock up my feelings in a cage and slide the key into my back pocket. They never went away, and I knew they never would go away, even if this didn’t work out. He was the one.
He would always be the one.
“What are you thinking about?” he whispered, his chest rising and falling with his even breathing.
My fingers lightly traced the groove of one of his abs, feeling how ripped he was even when he was at rest. He had those sexy lines that formed a V in his hips, and he had a muscular and tight ass that made his jeans fit so snugly. Everything about him was sexy, from his sculpted thighs, to his broad shoulders, to those beautiful brown eyes. Sometimes I wondered if I was infatuated with him, cast under his spell of handsomeness, but I knew it was more than that. I was both infatuated with his features and utterly obsessed with his good heart. It made me realize I’d never loved Vince, even at our best, even when I hoped he would ask me to marry him.
That wasn’t this.
If I could go back in time and wave a magic wand and make sure Vince had never been married, I still wouldn’t.
I’d rather have this—whether it lasted forever or broke my heart.
“Baby?” he pressed when I didn’t answer the question.
I made up a lie. “I wonder what my IQ is.”
He grinned at the comment.
“It’s not going to be 205 like yours, or however high it is now, I’m sure.”
He rolled his eyes. “The IQ test is overrated. All it measures is your logic and your ability to solve problems. But there are other kinds of intelligence that are far more important. You can say my dad is profoundly gifted because of his IQ score, and my mom might measure at average, but she’s far more intelligent than he is in a lot of ways. So, really, what does it mean?”
I loved that he never put his father on a pedestal over his mother just because he was the more intellectually gifted one, the one who made all the money, the one who had a Nobel. They were equal in Dex’s eyes because he saw the good in everyone. “You’re sweet.”
“I’m serious.”
“I think that’s what I love about you the most, that you don’t think you’re better than anyone else.”
“Because I’m not. Just more privileged.”
How the hell did that dumb bitch wife of his leave him? She was supposedly a lawyer, but she didn’t seem very smart to me. My hand moved over his stomach and then his chest, stopping when I felt the steady beat of his heart, low and rhythmic, like he could fall asleep.
He watched me.
“I like feeling your heartbeat.”
“Does it sound happy?”
“I don’t know. What does happy sound like?”
“Repetitive. Constant. Gentle.” He slid his hand over his own heart and felt it for a few seconds. “Yeah, it sounds happy.” He moved his hand to mine next, scooping underneath my tit so he could get right next to it. He looked into my eyes as he felt it beat. “It’s a good heartbeat, just seems a little fast.”
“You make it fast.”
His eyes lingered on my face for a while before he gently pulled his hand away. “I got tested yesterday…should get my results tomorrow.”
I knew exactly what test he was talking about, and if he still had his hand on my heart, he would feel it race even more.
“Maybe you should get yours done.”
“I got tested after my last relationship…because he was married. Haven’t been with anyone since.” I’d gone into the doctor’s office right after I found out Vince was married with two kids, and I was so relieved I didn’t have anything.
Dex accepted my answer. “So, are you on birth control or…?”
“The pill.”
He tried to hide his reaction, but his suppressed smirk was visible in his clenched jaw. “Good to know.”
I chuckled at his poor attempt to play it cool. “Yeah. I can’t wait.”
He turned back to me, and this time, he couldn’t hide his smile. “Me neither, baby. Me neither.”
18
Dex
I got an email with my results.
Clean.
I was almost tempted to forward it to Sicily, but I thought that would be super tacky. If the results said otherwise, I would tell her. So, it was best just to let it go unsaid. I hadn’t had this conversation with a woman since…well…Catherine. And that was a long time ago. That kind of freaked me out a little bit, but I chose to let it go.
Don’t think about the past.
Just live in the moment.
Whatever happens…happens.
When I was finished with the residents at the hospital, I went by the bank then headed to my parents’ place. It’d been a while since I’d swung by, and sometimes I ran into the clients who lived there, who would then ask why I’d left the Trinity Building.
Told them it just didn’t work out.
I wasn’t going to tell them I was a heart surgeon now.
I made it to their front door and knocked.
“It’s open.” My dad’s voice was audible from across the room.
I opened the door and stepped inside, in my scrubs and a jacket. It was a little less cold because winter was finally waning, and pretty soon, I wouldn’t freeze without a jacket.
Dad stopped what he was doing in the kitchen and looked up at me, his countenance quickly brightening when he saw me step inside. “Hey,
son. What brings you here?”
“Possibly dinner,” I said. “But it depends on what you’re making.”
Mom sat at the dining table with her laptop open. “Veggie burgers.”
“Oh,” I said. “That’s not bad. I’ll stay for dinner.”
“I don’t remember inviting you,” Dad said with a chuckle.
“Come on, I’m always invited.” I walked over to my mom and leaned down and kissed her on the cheek before I joined my dad in the kitchen. “Mind if I grab a beer?”
“Nope.” Dad added another patty to the pan so the fake meat could sizzle. He constructed the other burgers then handed a plate to me. “Give that to your mother.”
“Got it.” I delivered it to Mom, like a waiter working at a restaurant. “Anything else I can get you?”
“I’ll take a beer too.”
I went back into the kitchen and got her one.
Dad finished with the other burger, threw it together with the bun, and then we sat at the dining table together, talking about work, what was new at the Trinity Building, and what else was new with life.
I didn’t mention Sicily.
I wasn’t sure why. I knew they’d be happy.
“So, what’s new with you?” Mom asked. “I assume your charity fund is no longer depleted.”
I shook my head. “Nope. I’ve got more money than I know what to do with now. I shouldn’t have any problems giving my patients financial assistants until next year. The world can be a shitty place, but sometimes you’re reminded how awesome people can be. Really generous.”
Dad nodded. “Well said.”
“Speaking of money…” I reached into my pocket and pulled out the paper. “I wanted you to have this.” When I unfolded it, I realized it was actually the STI panel from the clinic. “Whoa, not that.” I gave an awkward chuckle before I folded it again, certain they didn’t even have a chance to look at it.
But my dad lifted his sharp gaze and stared at me with suspicion.
I opened the check and placed it on the table. “One down, one to go…”
Dad stared at it for a few seconds before he picked it up and examined it further. He exchanged a look with my mom before he released a quiet sigh, holding the thin piece of paper between his fingers. “Let me say that I’m very proud that you’ve gotten back on your feet so quickly.” He set the check back on the table. “But your mother and I don’t want your money—”
“Nope.” I pushed the check closer to him, forcing him to take it. “You’re taking this. I’m not letting my parents buy my apartment. I’m a grown-ass man who doesn’t need my parents for anything except their love.”
Dad watched me for a while, struggling with two different emotions. He was obviously proud that I had so much integrity, that I respected him too much to take his money, that the only reason I came by for dinner was to spend time with them, not to ask them for anything. But he also wanted to give me everything and never have me work for anything. “Dex, this must be most of your profit for the last few months—”
“Whatever. I’m debt-free now. Well, at least I have a place to live. It’s going to take me longer to reimburse you for the office and all the business expenses you’ve helped with. Besides, I don’t need a lot of money. I kick back with groceries during the week, canceled my gym membership because I have my own workout equipment at home, and the ladies don’t mind getting tacos and shots.”
Dad exchanged another look with my mom, like he wanted to argue but knew I had him cornered.
Mom rubbed his forearm, silently telling him to let it go.
Dad turned back to me. “Alright…thank you.” He folded the check and left it on the table.
“No, Dad. Thank you.”
Dad walked me out the door, into the elevator, and all the way down to the lobby.
“You didn’t have to walk me all the way down here, Dad.”
He was in his sweatpants with a t-shirt, not caring if the other residents saw him in his casual attire. My dad didn’t give a damn about anything, and that was probably where I got it from. “I wanted to talk to you about something.”
“Uh oh. What’d I do?”
He stopped in front of the double glass doors that showed the street outside. The doormen were outside, waiting for a resident to step inside, even though very few people came and went after dinnertime. “Tacos and shots.”
I stared at him, my eyebrow cocked. “Sorry?”
“You said the ladies like tacos and shots.”
“Well, yeah. I mean, most people do. What’s your point?”
“Did you mean to say the lady likes tacos and shots?”
My eyes narrowed on his face.
“I saw your paper. The first one.”
“You weren’t supposed to…”
“You know I have a photographic memory. I see something once, it’s stuck in my head forever.” He stood with his hands in his pockets, looking at me like that was all he needed to say for me to start talking. “Sounds like you’re serious with someone. At least, monogamous.”
I crossed my arms over my chest and looked out the window. “Maybe I’m just doing my due diligence on my health. Ever think of that, Dr. Hamilton?”
“Is that what you were doing?” He stared at me with those deep, brown eyes, like he could catch any lie that came out of my mouth.
I released an annoyed sigh. “You’re a nosy son of a bitch, you know that?”
His face melted into a smile. “I don’t care about your business, Dex. I’m just wondering about your happiness. When a man is monogamous, it usually means he’s happy. Does that apply to you?”
It’d only been a few weeks since I kissed her, since I changed our entire relationship and stepped into a romance I didn’t think I was ready for. It was a bit anxiety-inducing, and there were times when it felt like too much, but for the most part, it was pretty fucking nice. “Yes.”
“And this woman making you happy…is it Sicily?”
“Come on, who else would it be?” She was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen, and I got to look at her every single day except Sunday. Was there ever going to be someone more desirable than her? Someone better? Someone who had a bigger heart and an even bigger soul?
My dad’s eyes lightened like that was the best news he’d heard in a while. “I was hoping it wouldn’t be anyone else.”
Daisy sat beside me on the couch, her legs crossed with a beer in her hand, her boots kicked off onto the rug since she’d been wearing them all day at the clinic. “His brain scans are showing these lesions, and they’re getting bigger every time I see him. His memory is becoming more impaired, and there’s been a physiological change to his brain. He gets emotional easily, like really easily.”
“Well, it’s got to be stressful slowly losing your memory in your fifties with no real explanation. Stress and anxiety are real triggers for disease. The brain stem is just leaking cortisol in people who are constantly stressed.”
“I’m not refuting that, but I think his emotional responses are caused by whatever seems to be attacking his brain.”
“Infection?”
She shook her head. “I’ve tested for everything I can think of.”
“Did he work around harsh chemicals when he was younger?”
She shook her head. “He’s been a corrections officer his whole life.”
“Was he assaulted by one of the prisoners? Maybe he had a head trauma and he didn’t realize it at the time, but it causes some anatomical issue. And once it reached critical levels, it caused all these harsh symptoms.”
She shook her head. “I asked that too. He said no.”
“But you also said he has a memory problem.”
She took a drink as she looked at me.
“Is it possible he did get hurt and he just doesn’t remember?”
She chewed on the inside of her lip as she considered it. “I’ll take a drive out to the prison tomorrow and do some investigating. Because maybe you’re right. He
doesn’t have any family, so I have no one to ask.”
“Hope you get some answers. No one should have to live like that.”
“Yeah.” She sank into the chair and continued to drink her beer. “So, what’s going on with you?”
“Just work and stuff.”
“What constitutes ‘stuff’?”
Getting blow jobs from my assistant. “The only thing I do outside of work is work out and see you.”
“Wow, that’s lame.” She set her beer on the coffee table then watched the game for a moment before she said, “You know, Sicily looked pretty damn fine at that dinner a couple weeks ago. And according to her…her tits just look like that.”
“I know.” The words just burst out of my mouth, my memory pulling up an image in my head, her dress bunched around her waist, her perfect rack ready for me to devour.
“You know?” Daisy asked incredulously.
“Come on, I’m a guy.”
“Then do what guys do and get on that.”
“Why are you so obsessed with me getting together with Sicily?”
“Because she’s awesome? Because she’s hot? Because she’s not some gold digger? Because she likes you for you?” She rolled her eyes. “Dex, what more do you want? That woman worships the ground you walk on. If it weren’t going to kill you, she would make you a pie every single day.”
Well, I was eating her pie pretty often, and that was much better. “Not that it’s any of your business, but she and I are kinda…you know…together.”
Daisy’s jaw slackened, and she stared at me in surprise, like she really didn’t see that coming. “Jesus, it’s about time. Did you hit that?”
My eyes narrowed.
“What?”
I didn’t answer her question. “I told her I wanted to take it slow. We’ll see where it goes.”
“That makes me so happy, Dex. Everyone in the family really likes her.”
“Yes, I’ve noticed.”
She scooted over on the couch then wrapped her arms around me for a big hug, squeezing me to her. “Oh, this is so great.”
The Doctor Who Has No Closure (Soulless Book 10) Page 21