by Amy Andrews
It didn’t make her cool.
Tears welled in her eyes again, and she dashed them furiously away. Stop it. They’d been hooking up; that was it. She couldn’t expect Cole to just up and leave a job opportunity in Australia after all he’d been through in the past six months, to stay here and be with her and her suddenly malfunctioning tear ducts.
She was just…lonely. That was all. That’s what Cole’s little stay had shown her. She was so busy keeping everything humming along, she didn’t take time for herself—she didn’t hang out with friends or go out on girls’ nights. So of course it had been nice to have company.
Clearly, that had to change when she got back to California, in case she started looking at every guy who crossed her path in a completely inappropriate way.
“I can’t believe how amazing this room turned out.”
Jane blinked rapidly as CC Carter—Wade’s wife and the woman who’d employed her—entered the room. She was in a light cotton dress, the fabric loose around her eight-month-pregnant belly. She and Wade had arrived this morning with the furniture-moving people and were staying on for a few days after the magazine shoot to spend some time with Wade’s parents. They were heading back to Denver after that for the baby’s impending birth.
“I keep coming in here to stare at it.”
“Yeah.” Jane laughed. “Me, too.”
CC looked up at the chandelier, one hand absently rubbing her bump. “All of the chandeliers look incredible. How on earth did you get them so sparkly?”
Jane didn’t think CC wanted to hear from the wash of a million tears. So she smiled and said, “Cotton gloves, soapy water, and elbow grease.”
“I can’t wait to see it all lit up in a couple of hours.”
“It’s lovely,” Jane said wistfully, remembering the first time she’d flicked the switch after she’d finished cleaning. “It lights up like a concert stage, and it throws rainbows on the wallpaper.”
That had made her cry, too. Ugh. Eye roll.
“Oh.” CC smiled and fluttered her hand over her décolletage. “I’m so excited.” Jane laughed, and CC joined in before sobering a little and tipping her head in the direction of the kitchen. “Wade and I are having a drink out back. It’s depressingly nonalcoholic, but we’d love for you to join us.”
“Ah, sure.” Jane had only just met Wade today. She’d never really followed football, but she’d known of him, of course. He seemed really nice and clearly devoted to his wife.
God… Blink. Blink. Do not cry again.
“I just want to give the room another once-over.”
“Okay.” CC nodded. “See you out there,” she said as she departed.
Left alone again, Jane refused to get sappy about or be jealous of the easy banter and obvious love between Wade and CC. They were a sweet couple—good for them—it had nothing to do with her or her circumstances, and she needed to check the floor.
Again. For the tenth time today.
Casting her eyes down, she let them rove over the parquetry. Truth was, she didn’t need to check it at all—it was perfect. She just couldn’t stop looking at it. It was a visual feast, and the privilege she felt at being the person that had been entrusted with its care and restoration would, she hoped, always be with her.
A knock on the front door interrupted her feast, and her heart rate spiked a little. Cole? But Cole had a key, or at least knew where it was, so why would he knock? She frowned as she hurried to see who it was, knowing that Wade and CC wouldn’t have heard the knock from out back. Had the magazine people arrived early?
It wasn’t the magazine people. It was Cole. Standing on the portico like he hadn’t been AWOL for a week.
“Hi,” Jane said, vaguely aware of a car pulling away from the curb behind his head as her eyes devoured the breadth of him and her pulse fluttered madly at her wrists and temples.
He was wearing dark blue trousers that clung to his powerful quads and a yellow shirt. The top two buttons were undone, and his shoulders were really testing out the seams as he leaned on his stick. His dark, unruly hair had been pulled back into a man bun, and his jawline sported a five-o’clock shadow.
It was so different to his usual board shorts and T-shirt it caused a pulse to flutter right between her legs.
A slight smile curved his mouth at the corners. “Hey.”
And then neither of them said anything for a moment or two as Jane tried to process that he was actually here. In Credence. Despite his text, she’d been sure she was never going to see him again, and to have him standing here—so close she could feel the heat coming off his body, smell the sweet, heady aroma of his aftershave—was unexpected.
Overwhelming.
Things stirring inside her chest—growing and expanding—were making it difficult to breathe. For one awful moment, she thought she might cry, and she panicked at the thought. What the hell was happening to her? God…she wasn’t developing feelings for him, was she?
No. She’d known him for two weeks. She’d just…missed his company, that’s all this was. “I suppose you’ve come for your things?” She forced the words out as she clung tight to the doorknob, quelling the urge to lift her foot and fling herself into his arms.
She’d known him for two weeks. He lived in Australia.
The small smile on his mouth disappeared. “No.” He shook his head. “I’ve come for you.”
Jane would have been inhuman had her heart not skipped a beat. In fact, hers skipped several. But she stayed put, her grip on the doorknob so tight now she was surprised it didn’t just buckle in her hand. “What does that mean?”
He glanced over her shoulder. “Do you think I could come in so we could talk?”
“No.” It might not be her place to deny a friend of Wade’s access to Wade’s house, particularly when he was in residence, but she needed to be out in public with this man. She’d missed him, and that may cause her to do something dumb, like drag him into her magnificent red sitting room and have her way with him, and that was not going to help the situation.
Or be good for the parquetry.
“Okay.”
“What does it mean?” Jane repeated.
“It means—” He shoved a hand in his hair, dropping it to his side when his man bun stopped his fingers from going any farther. His gaze settled on hers and held. “I love you. And I want to be with you.”
Jane blinked. And blinked again. Love? Her heart banged so loud she thought it had exploded. Love? That was… They’d been with each other for two weeks. That was madness.
Sure, it was fair to say she had a bad case of lust for Cole Hauser, and she was pretty sure that was reciprocated.
But love? How absolutely preposterous.
Tad had always maintained he knew he loved her within a couple of hours, but it had taken her much longer to fall for him. And besides, Tad had cheated on her, and they were divorced—hardly a great advertisement for the staying power of instalove.
“Well?” He gave her a tentative smile. “Are you going to say anything?”
Oh yeah. She was saying something, all right. “That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve heard.”
“I know. It’s totally bonkers. But there it is.”
“You were here for two weeks.” She folded her arms. “We didn’t even have sex until the second week.”
“I know. I’m as surprised as you are. But I do—”
He took a step forward, halting abruptly when she shrank. Sighing, he retreated, walking to the edge of the portico, his limp minimal. He glanced up and down the street for a long few moments before turning back, his hands in his pockets.
“I didn’t plan on this, Jane, and frankly it’s highly bloody inconvenient. But you burst into my life from that first night in your underwear with those pliers at half past stupid hour, and nothing’s been the same ever since.”
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“No.” She shook her head. He was just misappropriating the feelings that were coming from below his belt. Given she was subject to them as well, Jane could see how they could easily be confused. “I think you’re equating lust with love, Cole.”
His eyes found hers and held as he very slowly shook his head from side to side. “I’m thirty-two years old, Jane. I’ve been in lust a lot. I know what that feels like. It’s physical. This thing I’m feeling is emotional and way deeper than my dick. It’s like my chest is going to burst with it—there’s just too much to contain. Lust doesn’t…wreck you. It’s easy, not hard. Love is hard. Love is a real prick.” He grimaced. “I’m sorry. I hope you didn’t want Shakespeare.”
Jane might’ve laughed had this not been so serious. Cole may not be reciting poetry, but goose bumps broke out on her arms anyway. He sounded so utterly certain, and part of her, a wild beating thing roaming free inside her, was whispering treacherous things, like…maybe he’s right and why not?
Because, that’s why. Because it couldn’t be love. She wouldn’t let it be love. She didn’t have time in her life for someone else. Something else. And how would they even make it work? “This…what we had…was a holiday fling, and everyone knows they don’t work out, Cole. People aren’t themselves on vacation. They’re happy and relaxed and carefree. Nothing we had was real.”
“That’s bullshit, Jane.” He didn’t say it angrily, but his words were terse. “For a start, I was on holiday; you weren’t. And I’ve been realer with you than I’ve ever been with anyone. This accident has stripped me right back to my core, and that’s how you saw me. I’m as real as I’ve ever been.”
“No, that’s bullshit.” It was Jane’s turn for terse words as she took two steps toward him, onto the portico, her pulse whooshing like rapids through her ears. How dare he try to pretend he was being real? “You weren’t on holiday, either. You were hiding away here from the rest of the world. From life. And I was the distraction from your career crap. I was a…pleasant interlude, and you’re confusing that. You’re not in love with me. People don’t fall in love in two weeks.”
He shrugged. “I did.” He withdrew his hands from his pockets and clasped them together in front like he wanted to reach out for her but knew he shouldn’t, settling for something that looked a lot like begging. “Let me spend the rest of my life proving it to you.”
She shut her eyes briefly. This was pie in the sky, and damn him for putting it out there. “And when did you have this epiphany? You’ve been gone a week.”
“I wanted to get my ducks in a row. I know there are barriers and challenges for a relationship between us, and I wanted to make it possible to be together.”
Barriers and challenges? Jane snorted—now there was an understatement.
Aside from the sheer logistics, the fact was she and Cole weren’t the only people in this equation. There was Finn, and he was the most important factor. Jane didn’t get the luxury of acting on a whim or giving things a try.
Finn was already madly infatuated with Cole—taking a chance, letting him prove his love and it not working out would have an impact on more than her.
If Finn never saw Cole again now, he’d be disappointed. He’d talk about him for a while and miss him a little, but he’d soon forget. If they went with the pie in the sky Cole was selling and started seeing each other regularly and it didn’t work?
Finn would be devastated.
He already had one split home. Why would she risk that again? She’d have to be really sure, and how could she be after two weeks? “This isn’t just about me.”
“I know that.”
He stepped closer then, and Jane’s heart skipped a beat. “Finn is my priority.”
“I know that, too.” He nodded. “I know you and Finn are a package deal, that you’re a team. But Jane…” He lifted his hands to reach for her, then dropped them, obviously thinking better of it. “I love that little guy just as much as I love you, and I want to be part of his life as much as I want to be part of yours. He’s such a great kid.”
Jane snorted. “You’ve known him for two weeks. You haven’t seen him at his worst. When he’s cranky or having a tantrum or sick or clingy or crying. You haven’t had to read the same boring book to him every night over and over and over for weeks on end until you want to pluck your eyes out. You don’t know how stubborn he can be, how naughty. How he can push your buttons.”
“You’re right. I don’t. I don’t know a lot of that. But I want to. I want to be there for it all. The good and the bad.”
“God, Cole…” She shook her head sadly. “That’s not the worst part. The worst part is he’ll love you.” Finn would love Cole deeply. “He’ll fall hard.”
Her voice cracked a little at the thought, and he took a step toward her, his brow suddenly creased with concern. She waved him back to his spot. It was important she said this because there was no way anyone was more invested in Finn and his well-being than she was.
“And you can’t just walk away if you’re over all the challenges. Because it will devastate him. He was too young when Tad and I split to remember any of that time. As far as he’s concerned, Tad and me living in two separate houses is normal. But if you come on the scene and love him and leave him at some point down the track because it’s hard—and it will be, because it is—he will remember. And I will hate you for that. A kid’s for life, Cole, not just a vacation.”
“I know that, Jane. God…trust me, I more than anyone understand how devastating it is when someone you love and trust betrays that love and trust. And I would never do that to Finn. Never. I would not be here in front of you now if I wasn’t one hundred percent committed to both of you. I am here for the long haul.”
The conviction in his voice rang sure and clear, and Jane might not know much else for sure, but she knew Cole meant what he said. She knew he truly understood the kinds of psychological wounds that could be inflicted on a child, and when he said he wouldn’t ever do that, she believed him.
“Let me love you, Jane. Please.” He took a step toward her, and she didn’t try to wave him back this time. “Let me love both of you.”
She shut her eyes. The picture he was painting was so damn seductive… She didn’t even realize she’d missed being loved until he’d put it so temptingly out there. But how could he be so sure after such a short amount of time? She couldn’t afford to gamble like that.
“Cole?”
Jane’s eyes flew open, and she blinked rapidly to quell the prickle at the backs of her eyes as she and Cole both took a startled step back. A grinning Wade joined them on the portico. “Dude, I didn’t know you’d arrived.”
CC also joined them, and Jane shot her an awkward smile as Wade, clearly oblivious to the tension between her and Cole, pulled him into a back-slapping bear hug. CC glanced between them, obviously a little more in tune to the vibe.
“God, how long has it been?” Wade asked as he released Cole from his enthusiastic embrace.
“Long time,” Cole said, his smile fixed and awkward.
“Oh, you haven’t met CC.”
Wade performed the introductions, and Cole indulged in some painfully polite chitchat about the baby, but Jane was aware of the way his gaze kept straying to her, even though she didn’t return it.
“Well, come on, then,” Wade said. “Why are we all standing around out here? We’re having drinks out back. We were just coming to find Jane to see what was keeping her. Come on in and join us.”
Jane stiffened a little, wondering if it would be rude to say no. Cole glanced at her, clearly trying to ascertain if it was okay to accept the invitation. CC looked from one to the other, a little frown between her brows. “Oh, hey, honey…” She smiled at Wade. “I’ve got a better idea. Why don’t you and Cole go to Jack’s and catch up for a bit?”
Wade frowned, looking at his wife. “Because t
he beer here is free.” He glanced at Cole, then at Jane, then back at his wife. His brow also started to crease like he might be finally catching the stilted vibe.
“Wade Carter, you’re richer than god. Take this man to a bar.”
There was a moment or two of silence when Wade glanced around the group again several times, then back to CC.
“You can talk as much football as you want,” she said, nodding encouragingly, “and Jane and I can talk about cracked nipples and episiotomies.”
Wade blinked. “Episi what?”
She patted his shoulder. “It’s where they cut—”
“Okay.” Wade quickly shut his wife down, looking a little green around the gills. He turned to Cole. “You up for Jack’s?”
Cole looked about as up for Jack’s as Wade did, but he nodded anyway. “Sure. Why not.”
“Okay then.” Wade dropped a kiss on CC’s forehead, then gestured to the stairs. “After you,” he said to Cole.
Jane and CC watched them walk down the stairs, down the path, and out the gate before CC moved. “Shall we go in?” she suggested gently, sliding a hand under Jane’s elbow like Jane was the pregnant one requiring assistance.
Lordy…she must look bad.
Jane nodded, and they walked inside, CC shutting the door behind them. “Please tell me to mind my own business if this is a giant overstep,” she said as Jane stopped in the middle of the entrance hall and CC had to step around her. “But…are you in love with Cole Hauser?”
Jane sucked in a breath as the truth sucker punched her. “Yes.”
God help her, she was. She didn’t know when it had happened, but she couldn’t deny it any longer. She couldn’t label it as something else. It was pure, old-fashioned, smack-you-upside-the-head, hit-you-like-a-ton-of-bricks love.
And she promptly burst into tears.
Chapter Fifteen
Cole was far too distracted to register much of Wade’s conversation as they walked to Jack’s.
A ball of dread churned in his gut; anxiety charged through his veins. He hadn’t been sure how Jane would react to seeing him again. He’d hoped she’d throw herself into his arms and tell him she loved him, too, but given her level of withdrawal in Denver, he’d thought she might be a bit standoffish.