by Abbi Waxman
Casper whooped. “Wait, she added to her story an hour ago.” He turned his phone to face us. There was Alice, briefly, then a swinging pan around to a giant stone lion, then back to Alice.
“Public library,” said Chloe. She checked her watch. “They’ve been closed for hours, though.”
“Wait, she just posted this.” Casper was literally jumping up and down. “It’s that clock thing, that round clock thing. She’s there right now.”
“Grand Central,” I said, surprising myself. They looked at me and I shrugged. “I watch movies.”
“It’s in movies?”
“Casper,” I said, “the main hall at Grand Central has been in so many movies.”
“Name one.”
“Why are we talking about this?” asked Will. “Shouldn’t we be heading to Midtown?”
“Come on,” said Chloe, “the subway’s right here.”
“Shouldn’t we get a cab?” I asked. “Wouldn’t it be quicker?”
She laughed. “Nope, on Friday evening the quickest way to get across town is not a cab.” She headed off. “Let’s pray there are no subway delays.”
27
JESSICA
So, Emily and Chloe went off to do something downtown, leaving me with Amanda and Rob.
“Are they up to something, do you think?” I asked Amanda as we heard the door close downstairs.
“Almost certainly,” she replied. “They usually are.”
“Well, I didn’t think so,” I replied, “but Emily surprised the shit out of me this week.” I told her about the cheating.
She laughed. “Man, I look back at high school and laugh at how easy we had it, don’t you?”
I nodded. “Yup. I don’t remember pressure like they have, or even that much interest. Going to high school in the nineties was pretty straightforward.”
“I didn’t even have a computer until college.”
“I didn’t have a cell phone until college.”
“I didn’t have sex until college.”
I coughed. “Uh . . .”
She laughed. “Well, you beat me there. But our kids grew up in a literally changed world from us. When they say, It’s not like it was when you were young, they’re actually right. Very irritating.”
Rob came in. “Hey, do you guys want to smoke pot and play video games?”
I turned to Amanda. “He’s joking.”
She shook her head. “Nope. This is the one drawback of him spending all his time around young people. He thinks he is one.”
I threw a soft cushion at Rob. “Dude, get a grip.”
He laughed. “Age is just a number, Jess. You’ve followed the rules all your life, why not break down this once?” He waved a little pen-looking thing at me. “It’s not smoke, it’s vapor. You won’t even cough.”
I suddenly felt my reservations melt away. “Why not? This has been a challenging week. But I am not playing video games. Whenever I watch Em do it, I get motion sickness.”
Amanda grinned and took the vape pen from her husband. “That’s fine, you and I can sit here, eat chips, and make fun of him. It’s great, I do it a lot these days.”
“Okay,” I said. “And maybe it will help me work out what the hell I’m going to do with myself after Emily leaves.”
“Or even before,” said Rob. “If I’ve learned anything in the last year or so, it’s that it’s all very well to look before you leap, but you shouldn’t look for too long.”
“Are you stoned already?” said Amanda, laughing. “You sound like a fortune cookie.” She stood up. “Speaking of which . . .” She headed into the kitchen.
I inhaled deeply, proving that smoking is like riding a bicycle; your body remembers even if you don’t. Then I settled back for a quiet, reflective evening of intelligent conversation and emotional clarity. Or eating my body weight in cookies and laughing at everything, whatever.
It’s not like I’m going to need to do anything this evening. Emily isn’t even here. I pointed at my friends. “You must promise never to tell Emily about this, okay?”
Rob exhaled and nodded. “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.”
“We’re not in Vegas.”
“Exactly.”
It was after the second round of pot that I suddenly realized I’d never turned my phone back on after I’d turned it off in the hotel room. I probably should have left it off, to be honest, but my stoner brain was very confident.
It started buzzing the minute I turned it on.
“My god,” said Amanda, “it’s possessed.”
“Seven texts from John, four from Valentina, and two from Ostergren.” I looked at my friend. “Shall I throw the phone away and tell them I was robbed?”
“Yes.” She nodded. “You’re thousands of miles away, they’ll never know.”
The phone rang. I answered it instinctively. “Uh . . . yes?”
“Jessica, it’s John.”
“Hello,” I replied carefully. I heard a noise—Amanda was picking up the vape pen again. I frowned at her.
“Ostergren’s acquisition is going through, and he’s demanding both you and Valentina on his account.”
I thought hard. “Is Valentina a partner yet?”
“No.”
I hung up. Then I giggled. “That may have been a mistake on my part.”
Amanda stared at me. “Did you just hang up on your boss?”
“Yes. He was asking for it.” My phone rang again. John. “Hi, John. Is Valentina a partner now?”
He was sputtering. “Jessica, did you just . . .”
I hung up again.
“You’ve lost your mind,” said Amanda, raising her voice. “Rob, take off that ridiculous headset, Jessica has lost her mind. She’s too high, we need to make some coffee.”
Rob shook his head. “It won’t help, it’ll simply add a layer of hyper over the top of the stoned. Can I go back to my game?”
John rang again, and this time he spoke first. “I just sent an email. Valentina is now a partner.”
“And Janet?”
“No, it’s too . . .”
Click. I started to giggle. “Why didn’t I do this earlier?”
Ten minutes later the phone buzzed again. It was a text from Valentina. “I just made partner, and so did Janet, what did you do?”
I called John. “Very impressive, John. I guess your powers of persuasion haven’t been underestimated. Now, how can I help you?”
“I need you to come back right away. I need your input on the deal.”
“I’m with my daughter. It can wait until Monday. I’ll look it over on the plane.”
“You’ve been with her a whole week! What are you even doing?”
I exhaled. “We’re catching up. I withdraw my resignation, send me the deal to look over, I’ll see you in a few days, don’t worry.”
I put the phone on the coffee table. “Pass me the headset, Rob. I feel like blowing away some bad guys.”
EMILY
There was Wi-Fi on the subway, amazingly. We got out to change trains at Times Square, and Casper checked social media again.
He frowned. “She’s going somewhere, I guess. She’s not at Grand Central anymore.”
“But she’s still posting?”
He nodded.
“Well, then she’s not arrested. Maybe she didn’t meet the contact yet.”
“Or maybe she’s not meeting them at all.” Casper was annoyed with me. Then his face fell. “Oh . . .”
Will peered over his shoulder. “Selfie. Captioned: Meeting the Man, looking good.”
Casper swallowed. “She’s changed from before. She’s wearing a dress.”
Chloe shook her head. “Why would she dress up to do something illegal? Why on earth would she post about it? I mean, I know you
said she’s an obsessive poster, but come on. This doesn’t sound right to me.” She reached for Casper’s phone. “Can I?” She squinted at it. “She’s inside somewhere in this shot, but I can’t tell where.”
“Can’t you ask her where she is? Text her.”
“She’s not answering, I’ve been trying.” Casper was upset. “Maybe she’s going on a date. You know. With a boy.”
Will looked at me but said nothing.
“Wait,” said Chloe, “she’s at the Met. She posted a picture of the new fashion exhibit.” She checked the time. “It closes in an hour, let’s go. If we’re lucky we’ll get a northbound express to Eighty-Sixth.”
She started half running through the crowd, Casper close behind her. Will stared at me. “She knows the Met exhibits by heart?”
I shrugged. “She’s a New Yorker, maybe it’s a requirement, who knows?”
We hurried after her. I couldn’t tell if Will was still mad at me, and I really, really wanted to know.
We got lucky and leaped on an express as the doors were closing. The train was crowded, and I had to grab Will’s jacket to stay upright. He didn’t stop me, and there was a moment when he looked down at me and seemed about to say something. Then the brakes screeched and he turned away again. I have a pretty quiet life, let’s face it, and this whole week was starting to be a bit much. I suddenly wished my mom was there, and then felt dumb for wishing it. Why was being sixteen such a challenge for me? Everyone else was cool about their parents; I was such a loser.
The four of us pushed through the crowds at Eighty-Sixth Street and headed south, Chloe leading the way. The steps outside the Met were crowded with people leaving, arriving, and hanging out. It was like a party, and the air was filled with chatter in a dozen languages. I stared around and saw people my age everywhere, school tours like ours, a million backpacks and earbuds and cell phones.
“We’ll never see her,” said Will. “She might not even still be here.”
“There she is,” said Casper. And he was right. Eyes like a hawk, that kid.
Alice was standing on the sidewalk, talking to a man I’d never seen before. He was short and well dressed, holding a large yellow envelope and wearing dark glasses, despite the fact that the streetlights were already on.
“Crap,” I said, “who’s that?” I held up my phone and took a picture. “Wait, I’m going to ask my mom what to do.” I sent it.
The man was talking to Alice and she was nodding. She didn’t look worried; to be fair, she seemed relaxed and possibly even mildly bored. She reached for the envelope, and the guy jerked it out of reach, clearly explaining something.
“We have to stop her before she takes it,” said Casper. “The FBI must be close, they’re watching her.”
“Oh, so now you believe me?” I wasn’t happy about it. Part of me wanted to be right, but a bigger part of me was sad Alice was the cheater. She was many things, none of them super admirable, but this was going to really suck for her.
Suddenly, a car pulled up and a man in a dark suit got out.
“Shit,” said Will, “it’s the feds.”
Casper started running towards Alice, and the three of us weren’t far behind.
Casper was yelling as he went, and the FBI guy, Alice, and Envelope Man turned quickly. As Casper got close, the agent stepped in front of Alice and Envelope Man and held up his hands.
“Hold on, kid,” we heard him say, and then Casper sidestepped him and knocked the envelope out of Alice’s hands.
“Don’t do it, Alice,” he said, “you’re so much better than this.”
Which was when the guy in the suit jumped on him.
JESSICA
If it’s possible to feel guilty when receiving a text, I felt guilty. Sheepish might be a better word, and it’s certainly a funnier word.
I looked at my phone and frowned. I was wearing a tall stripy hat, pulled from an old dress-up box somewhere, and Amanda was sitting next to me, wearing a pair of aviator goggles. It had made sense at one point.
“Emily texted me,” I said. “Look.”
I angled the phone so Amanda could see it. “Huh,” she said. “They’re at the Met, how boringly educational of them.”
“Kids these days,” I said. “They’ve got no sense of adventure.”
“But who’s that?” asked Amanda. “Is that a friend of Emily’s?”
I examined the photo more carefully. “Yeah,” I said, “although I’m surprised they’re hanging out, they’re not very close. That’s Alice.”
“Alice the bitch?”
“Yeah.” It’s possible I had maligned Alice a little, in talking about the trip.
“Who’s that with her?”
I peered at the photo and smiled.
“Oh, that’s sweet,” I said. “It’s her dad.”
28
EMILY
Well, that was awkward.
It turned out that Alice was meeting her father. He was in town for work, and the big yellow envelope had contained cash for shopping and an upgraded first-class airline ticket. Alice was in the process of saying she’d rather sit in coach with the rest of us when Casper had crashed into them. Once the confusion of who was who was sorted out, and Alice’s dad’s driver had apologized to Casper, we all had a moderately good laugh about it. Of course, Alice had slowly turned to look at me when Casper explained I’d thought maybe she was involved in the cheating plot, which probably meant total social destruction when I got back to school. But hey, you might as well go out with a bang.
I got a text from my mom just as we were all sorting ourselves out.
“That’s her dad,” she said. “How nice. Are you having fun?”
“Yes,” I replied, then put my phone in my backpack and decided to ignore it completely.
Alice seemed particularly touched that Casper had been willing to tackle a potential criminal in order to save her reputation, and her dad invited us to dinner with them. Casper seemed pleased and went, despite having already eaten dinner, but Chloe had somewhere else to be. That left Will and me, and I was about to make my apologies and head back to the Upper West Side, when Will spoke.
“It’s very nice of you, sir, but Emily and I already have plans.” He stepped back and shut the car door, and we both watched it glide away.
“We do?” I asked. “What are our plans?”
He pulled me close and kissed me. “I’m going to apologize for being kind of a dick about this whole thing, and then we’re going to get the subway downtown to Union Square and get the best hot chocolate in the city.”
“I do like hot chocolate.”
“There you go,” he said. “I’m sure your mom won’t mind if you’re a little late.”
I shook my head. “I’ll text her. She worries.”
“Good idea,” he said, then we turned and started walking back to the subway, side by side. I’d have to wait to text; I couldn’t do it with one hand.
JESSICA
I had already sobered up quite a bit when I got another text from Emily, saying she was fine, she was with Will, and she was going to be a bit late. I told her I would see her at the hotel and turned to Amanda.
“That’s nice,” I said, “she’s hanging out with the boy she likes.”
“The one who gave her the chocolate?”
I nodded.
She smiled. “Well, hopefully they’ll get up to all kinds of mischief and have a wonderful time.”
“That would be good,” I said, looking around for my handbag. “Kids are so serious these days.”
Amanda walked me to the door. “You’ve given Emily the best seventeen years of your life, you’ve done everything for her. She’s beginning to live her own life, and you can live yours, too.”
I shrugged. “I am living my own life. Sometimes I felt I was working to take care of Emily, but
maybe that was just a convenient excuse. I work because I love it, and I’m good at it. I’m not sure I wouldn’t have been a crappy mother if I’d put my own needs second. Maybe I’m going to be the best mother ever of a young adult. Maybe little kids aren’t my forte.”
“Who knows?” said Amanda, opening the door. “Emily seems to have turned out totally awesome, regardless of your influence.”
“Yeah.” I stepped through the door and turned to face my friend. “Sometimes limits are their own form of freedom.”
“You’re stoned,” she said. “Text me when you get to the hotel.”
She shut the door and I hailed a cab. It was only when I got back to the hotel and went to the bathroom that I realized she’d totally let me leave the house with the stripy top hat still on my head.
She’s probably still laughing about it.
Saturday
New York City
8:00 a.m.: Breakfast: Review of the tour
10:00 a.m.: Columbia University
12:00 a.m.: Lunch at famous Upper West Side institution Tom’s Restaurant
2:00 p.m.: NYU
29
EMILY
Breakfast was surprisingly entertaining this morning. Will and I sat next to each other, as did Alice and Casper, who were clearly now an item. I prayed she wouldn’t be a total bitch and dump him as soon as we all got back to LA. He wasn’t her usual type (she tended to date older, cooler, scornful guys) but then again, Alice’s superpower was her ability to transcend the trend. Her dad was sitting on her other side, trying to hide the fact he was full-on working, and failing completely.
I was kind of hoping the adventures of the night before would stay secret, but Alice opened breakfast with the story of Casper tackling her chauffeur, and everybody thought it was hilarious.
Well, everyone except Cassidy. She glared at me accusingly.
“Wait, the FBI told you someone on this trip was a potential cheater and you didn’t tell me?”