The Library War

by Cecily Wolfe

  “Elton Library, how may I help you?”

  He looked out to the shelving area where he and Maya had stood together, making a concerted effort to pay attention to the voice on the other end of the line as he watched Maya walk back towards the children’s section, holding Walter in one hand. She had clearly left Fifty Shades on his cart for him to shelve for all of ten minutes before someone checked it out.

  As he typed in the title of the book the heard the woman on the phone ask about, Maya glanced up and smiled, a small smile that felt like a secret between the two of them, and Connor had to backspace twice to correct the misspellings that he knew were her fault, even if it was his fingers on the computer keyboard.

  “So, who did you decide to ask?”

  The next day, Maya had given Connor a break about the prom situation, at least for the walk to school. She hadn’t mentioned it again last night, but she knew if she waited, he would end up asking and taking someone more annoying than she could deal with.

  The three boys who had asked her were fine, one better than the other two as far as good company went, and she thought if she accepted his offer, he would go along with her plans. Now, for Connor’s date . . .

  She took a French fry from his lunch tray, waving it in the air in front of her face as she hummed, waiting for his answer. He shrugged.

  “I haven’t thought about it too much, honestly. You mentioned it only yesterday, you know.”

  Maya frowned at three girls who slowed as they walked by, doing their best to ignore her expression as they batted their eyes at Connor, giggling and shoving at each other. Maya sighed.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked, completely immune to the questionable charms of his fan club. He was staring at the French fry as if he worried what she meant to do with it, so she popped it in her mouth, not waiting to finish chewing it before answering.

  “That.”

  She tilted her head towards the center of the room, where the girls had walked by only moments earlier, and a group of kids wandered by now, which pretty much ruined her explanation, or semblance thereof. Connor shook his head at her, as if it wasn’t a big deal.

  “Okay, whatever. Hey, wait. You didn’t tell me who you decided to go with. Won’t that make a difference? I mean, we should pick someone who fits in, right? Someone who would have a good time with us.”

  This was sounding like a rock band audition instead of a prom date selection, Maya considered. She didn’t realize she was smiling until Connor reached across the table and shoved her a little, pushing her shoulder just enough to catch the attention of several girls on the other end of the table, who stared at Maya with narrowed eyes before widening them adoringly as their turned their focus to Connor.

  He kept his own eyes, and smile on Maya, which made her feel better about the whole situation. They had been friends for too long for this to be weird, but that was why she didn’t want to make it weird by talking about feelings or dating, at least between the two of them.

  Here and now, Maya, she told herself. Pay attention to what’s right in front of you.

  Her mother had always told her to focus and prioritize, and above all, be in the moment. Problem was, the moment was Connor, but he was also her concern for the future. Should she jeopardize their friendship for a chance at something more, either now or then?

  She wasn’t going to say anything about it now in the middle of the cafeteria, that was for sure.

  “Jason Hatcher.”

  Connor sat back. She wasn’t sure if he looked relieved or bored, but then he nodded.

  “Good man. He wouldn’t try to put the moves on you, either.”

  Before she could help herself, her mouth started moving.

  “What if I wanted him to?”

  She grinned after she said it, hopefully expressing that she was teasing, but Connor didn’t seem entertained by her words. Maybe he didn’t want to get trapped into a situation where Maya and her date got romantic, and he would end up uncomfortable with his own date.

  Maybe he would want to get romantic with his date, though.

  “I’m kidding, you know. Besides, we have to narrow down your choices. Jason’s pretty laid back, and we want him to have fun, too. You have to pick someone cool so all three of us end up having a good time.”

  “What about the girl?”

  Maya shrugged.

  “What about the girl?”

  Connor shook his head.

  “You are all over the place. Have you even thought about anything else since yesterday? How about the library assistant job? That’s kind of important.”

  He was right, and it was. And she had. She just didn’t want to think about what it meant to be up against Connor for anything, both because he would be tough to beat, but more importantly, they had never been at odds, but rather supported each other. Right now, it was easier, and more timely, to think about his prom date.

  “Yeah, but there’s time. I mean, we keep doing what we’re doing, right? Lindsay will tell us what to do when we actually have to apply.”

  Connor pushed his lunch tray to the side and leaned forward.

  “Okay. When you’re talking about the girl, my date, you’re not including her when you’re talking about the three of us having fun. I’m not going to go with someone and not take an interest in whether or not she’s having a good time. I know this is one of those important girl things, and I don’t want her to look back on this and remember what a jerk I was.”

  Maya rested her chin on the palm of her hand. She couldn’t imagine Connor being a jerk, to any girl, no matter what. She witnessed how he handled the girls who followed him around, girls she practically growled at because they were so clearly interested in him because he was popular.

  Girls who didn’t know Connor beyond the varsity letter on his school jacket. Girls who didn’t know that his favorite book was The Outsiders, and that he stayed up all night reading it back in seventh grade for Mrs. Duntready’s Language Arts class, his eyes bloodshot and teary the next day.

  Without thinking, she lifted her head and reached out her hand, taking one of his in her own.

  “There’s no danger of that, I promise.”

  Everything around them seemed to come to a standstill when Maya’s fingers curled over his own. It wasn’t as if they had never held hands before, but everything these past few days felt so different with her, and part of him wanted to pull away while a larger part wanted to turn his hand over and hold hers as well.

  He didn’t move, though, but kept his eyes on her, frozen to the spot as he waited for her to continue.

  “How about Kaylie West? She’s been your lab partner a couple of times, and I don’t think she has some kind of crazy crush on you so there wouldn’t be any hard feelings. Just friends going together. No misunderstandings.”

  Connor frowned. He wasn’t so sure that the boys who had asked Maya to the prom were asking as friends, but maybe Maya knew better.

  “Not a bad idea. I’ll see if I can find her in the hall sometime soon and ask if she wants to go with us.”

  Maya’s grip on his hand grew tight and he sucked in a breath.

  “Ask her soon. It won’t be long before more of these ridiculous promposals get out of hand.”

  She was right, Connor thought. Earlier that week Dustin Saunders filled the girls’ bathroom in the foreign language hallway with pink balloons in his quest to get a yes from his girlfriend of three years. Darcy had said yes after her friends dragged her into the bathroom and she saw the black Sharpies writing on the balloons, which made no sense because the words were out of order as the balloons had shifted around.

  Connor wasn’t sure what was so romantic about balloons in the school bathroom, but what did he know? When he had asked Maya what she thought, she had rolled her eyes. He wondered what she would find romantic, but it wasn’t something they ever talked about.

  Slapping her with an ice cream sandwich was the best way for someone to get her attention, pink balloons notwit
hstanding.

  “What are you smiling about? I don’t think Kaylie would want or need balloons, either in or out of a bathroom.”

  He laughed then, unable to help himself.

  “Yeah, things are going to get out of control in that department. I think Principal Dinard would have a cow if anyone pulled something like that again, though.”

  Everyone had been strongly discouraged from any sort of ‘public display’ over the PA system every morning since the balloon incident, as the school administration called it, but public display was such an indefinite term.

  “I’ll ask. Meanwhile, I better get moving, so I’ll see you later, with or without a prom date.”

  When Maya let go of his hand and stood up, Connor wanted to reach out and take hers, not quite ready to lose that contact. She didn’t seem to notice that he was staring at her, and waved airily before grabbing her backpack from the chair beside her.

  They would be volunteering at the library this afternoon, and would have the walk there to talk more, and if he happened to run into Kaylie beforehand, they might be good to go with this prom thing.

  Chapter Six

  The library hadn’t changed much since Maya and Connor had started volunteering there back in sixth grade, when neither one of them had a friend better than a book. The library manager, Lindsay, noticed how much time both of them spent in the building and offered them the opportunity.

  “What does a volunteer do?” Maya had asked, sure that this was just another adult trying to get a kid to do some work. It seemed like everyone was trying to push her into doing something productive, when all she wanted was to hide in the pages of the latest Cassandra Clare or Veronica Roth novel.

  Lindsay must have read her mind.

  “You love books, right? I can see that you both always have a book in your hand, usually more than one, and volunteering is all about helping the library keep the books straightened up so other people can find them more easily. Shelving them correctly, helping fill displays, that sort of thing. Nothing too difficult, at least for two kids who know a lot about books.”

  Connor had smiled immediately, drinking in the attention. Maya had recognized him from school, but knew that like her, he wasn’t one who usually chased after conversation with someone of any age. Some of the boys called him Big Bird, which made them look like bullies, but Maya could tell that Connor felt left out.

  He might not attempt to stand out, but she had seen him look longingly at the group that spread around the basketball hoop at recess, passing the ball back and forth and jumping at each other, hands splayed in the air.

  “Sounds cool. I’m in.”

  He had been so quick to agree, just as Maya was skeptical. She had waited a few moments, wondering when this woman, who had introduced herself as Lindsay, the library manager, would lose patience and either pressure her for an answer or give up and walk away. Maya waited longer than she thought necessary for either one to occur, but Lindsay had remained quiet, watching her patiently, and that’s what brought Maya to her answer.

  “Yeah, I guess.”

  Connor had held his smile during that wait, and turned it to Maya after she spoke. They had never acknowledged each other before that moment, and Maya was swept away by a brief bout of shyness at his wide-eyed openness, a need for a connection that was so painfully obvious.

  “Great. Why don’t you two talk it over with your parents, and stop by tomorrow after school. I know you would be here anyway, right? You can tell your parents that volunteering is something that will look good in the future, when you start applying for jobs, and even for college. I know that’s a long way away, but it can’t hurt to start now.”

  College, Maya had thought. Her mom worked so hard to buy her new shoes at the beginning of every school year, and she couldn’t remember the last time she had the money to buy a book of her own. The library had been their source of free entertainment as far back as Maya could remember, from the DVDs of preschool shows she had once loved to the true crime paperbacks her mother loved, and the heavy hardback teen fantasy novels she herself adored.

  College was a dream she didn’t dare to think about when she was twelve.

  It stared at her straight in the face now, only months away, and when she thought of ending her time at the library, her time spent with Connor sharing books they loved, hated, or loved to hate, she redirected herself. She knew the time would come eventually, but it seemed too close for comfort, and there wasn’t enough time to figure out how she felt and what she wanted with him. If she wanted something with him, something more than the friendship that had been built over stress, laughter, and ice cream sandwiches, she would have to tell him soon.

  “Hey!”

  Connor ran up beside her as she wandered in the school parking lot, something she had a habit of doing when she was lost in thought. She didn’t go too far, at least not enough to actually cause a traffic hazard. Or at least she thought she didn’t.

  She smiled at him before turning towards the drive that led to the lot from the road.

  “Ready to show Lindsay who’s the best shelf reader she’s got?”

  It wasn’t what she planned to say, but she wanted to challenge him, as a joke. She would be sure to get any details about whether or not he had been able to ask Kaylie to the prom, as well as make any further plans about the dance, but for now, it would be something to get them focused on what they had shared together the most for so long - the library.

  The library wasn’t just the space where they had met, or spent time together. It was where they had found so much in common, so much to talk about from the pages of books, from stories and characters, leading up to revelations about each other that had drawn them closer.

  Maya knew that she wanted to be closer than friends with Connor, but telling him might make him uncomfortable, unless he felt the same way. Which, of course, she wouldn’t know if she didn’t say anything.

  Instead, they could have a shelf reading contest and she could hide in the part of their relationship that was the most familiar and reassuring, even if she would have to deal with however it played out regarding this job Lindsay was sure one of them was bound to get. Only one.

  Shelf reading was the worst part of any library work, ever.

  Connor considered that probably cleaning the toilets in the public restrooms was the worst, but that was done by the cleaning service that came in overnight and magically removed the worst of the damage before anyone came in the next morning.

  He still wasn’t crazy about shelf reading and knew that Maya wasn’t either, although it was important enough that Lindsay had them doing it nearly every day as part of their work. It was just checking to be sure the books were shelved correctly, so why was Maya so gung-ho about doing it today, instead of hassling him about whether or not he had asked Kaylie to the prom?

  He really didn’t want to think too much about the job opportunity, because that was something that he knew they both wanted, but couldn’t share. One of them would be disappointed, and he didn’t want it to be either of them, which made no sense.

  “Hey, wait!”

  He called after her, but had no choice but to run to catch up when she either didn’t hear him or ignored him, continuing to run instead.

  When they finally reached a street corner where they had to stop and wait for a car to pass through a green light, Connor leaned into Maya, resting his forehead on the top of her own dark hair and feeling her stiffen beneath him. Maybe she was cold, he thought, while he was much too warm from the run.