by Cecily Wolfe
She stood up straight, nodding to herself as she forced a bounce in her step.
As soon as she saw Kaylie at school, she would apologize for missing the shopping trip, and plan another one with her. She would commit to spending time with Kaylie figuring out all those girly things that went along with prom planning, and when she saw Conner, she would tell him that she would forget about Friday night, at least until after the prom.
She could play nice with Conner, and she would expect the same of him. Surely he could manage it, if she could. It was definitely her fault they were in this predicament, since she was the one who insisted on going to prom in the first place, so she had to admit he had been a good friend for playing along.
Maya bit her lip when tears filled her eyes. Of course he had been a good friend. He had always been. Now this job opportunity was making them both crazy, and he didn’t even know how she felt about him.
How could she love him and be mad at him at the same time?
Conner stood in front of Maya’s house, staring at the kitchen window. There was movement there, just enough to leave a fluttery feeling in his stomach, but then he realized it was Maya’s mother. Maya was a little taller than her mother, and her hair was darker.
They both preferred to wear their long hair in ponytails, so at first glance it was easy to mistake one for the other, especially with a few feet and a window to interfere with clarity, as well as his own nervousness and desire to see Maya, even if she didn’t want to see him.
Maya’s mom waved at him through the window and he lifted a hand in acknowledgement, wondering what, if anything, Maya had told her about what had happened Friday night. Or what had been happening lately, at least since the library job had been on the table.
“She left a few minutes ago, but I thought you were already out here. Why else would she leave if you weren’t?”
Maya’s mom had opened the door and stood speaking to him as he worked through his thoughts. He wasn’t surprised that Maya had gone without him, but how could he explain that to her mother? How could he tell her that he had hoped to walk with Maya, even if he was fairly certain that Maya didn’t want to see him.
I kissed your daughter and now she hates me? No, that wouldn’t work.
“We had a disagreement Friday night, and I guess she’s still mad. I’ll catch up to her.”
His smile felt flat and false, and he could tell by the way Maya’s mother tilted her head as she watched him that she wasn’t buying it.
“I don’t know what’s going on with you two, but whatever it is, you need to work it out. Both of you.”
Her words made sense, but he wanted to tell her it was easier said than done. Everything he said and did seemed to be wrong in Maya’s eyes, and he didn’t know how to make things right if she didn’t want to talk to him. Even if she did, how could he know that he wouldn’t continue to upset her?
“Don’t nod at me, Conner. I could tell she had been crying for a while when I got home Friday night, and you look like that time we all had sushi and you ended up throwing up in a grocery bag in the backseat of my car.”
He couldn’t help but smile at that memory. His one and only time eating sushi at a Japanese buffet they tried for Maya’s birthday, and all he did was stink up their car for weeks. Maya complained as she held the bag for him, but afterwards, she had held a cold washcloth on his forehead as he rested on their sofa, chattering about Moby Dick.
Maya was the only person he knew who had read Moby Dick voluntarily, and back then, they had only been thirteen.
“I’ll catch up to her. I don’t know if she’ll want to see me, but . . .”
He heard his voice trail off, and he let his gaze drift down the street in the direction the two of them usually walked to school together. She wasn’t in sight, but if he ran after her, he would be able to catch up, and then he could worry about her reaction.
Maya’s mom reached out and rested her hand on his shoulder, a smile offering him a measure of reassurance. She was the only person who knew Maya as well as he did, and she wouldn’t be encouraging him if she wasn’t sure that Maya wouldn’t ignore him, right?
Conner nodded and mumbled a quick thanks, turning away in what he hoped wasn’t too much haste. He didn’t want to be rude, but he also didn’t want to let Maya get further away from him.
He didn’t hear the door close, so he knew that Maya’s mom was watching him as he started to run, down the driveway and onto the sidewalk, his legs taking him on the familiar route.
Two blocks from where he finally stopped to adjust one of the straps, he saw her, her ponytail resting against her back. Usually she was bouncing around so much that her hair flopped back and forth, like a cat’s tail, but her head was down and her hair still.
“Hey!” he called, then shut his mouth, too late to stop himself. If she didn’t want to see him, she would just keep walking, which would make it pretty awkward when he caught up. Not that it wouldn’t be awkward anyway.
She stopped walking but didn’t turn around as he started to run towards her again, hoping that her response was a good sign.
“Can we at least walk to school together, like usual? See if we can figure a way to work this out as we go?”
She shrugged after he spoke, but didn’t look at him. Before he could continue, she lifted her head and looked forward, taking a visible breath as if she meant to calm herself. Conner wanted to step in front of her and kiss her, but he knew that was the last thing she wanted.
“I think we need to make sure we don’t make Jason and Kaylie sorry they agreed to be our prom dates. We can’t be jerks to them. It isn’t fair.”
At least she was talking to him, and maybe, if he agreed to go along with what she said, she would consider turning the conversation towards what happened Friday night. Especially that kiss.
“Are you listening to me?”
As she spoke, sounding more than a little annoyed, he watched her eyes slide so she was looking at him from their corners. Turned away from him, she waited for his response, her lips pressed together tightly.
She had kissed him back; he knew that for certain. It wasn’t just his imagination. Had she thought about those few moments between them at all?
“Yes, I’m listening, and yes, I agree. We’d be lousy friends to them if we let this interfere with prom.”
It was true, and although his concern was mostly for Maya and their relationship, he didn’t want to ruin the prom for Jason and Kaylie either.
Maya nodded and started walking. Conner followed alongside, sneaking glances now and again as they made their way to school, knowing that she was aware of it every time he did.
Chapter Nineteen
Maya knew she wasn’t a good actress, but no one could ever accuse her of a lack of effort.
She parted ways with Conner as soon as they walked into the school building, but a lot of kids had seen them approach the school together, as always, so that wouldn’t raise any eyebrows. All eyes were always on Conner, and she was just now realizing how annoying and intrusive that was.
No one really cared about what she was doing, but if she was with Conner, everyone was watching. For girls, she was a potential rival for his time and attention, and for boys . . . she was a source of confusion. She wasn’t traditionally pretty, and she didn’t simper and fawn all over him.
What was the attraction, they wondered?
So if they weren’t with each other at lunch, or in the halls when they crossed paths, it would be noticed. Everyone would talk, speculate, and there would be questions, all of which would get back to their respective prom dates.
This was all her fault. The prom angle, anyway. Maya was determined, however, not to let Conner off the hook when it came to the library job.
And the kiss.
He was the last boy she could imagine would try to use a kiss to get his way. It made her wonder how wrong about anything else she had been, when it came to him. Why couldn’t he just be the same Conner he had b
een for six years, the same best friend he had been only a week ago?
She fought back memories of how it felt to have him kiss her, and for her to have kissed him back without a second thought. She hadn’t wanted to remain friends with Conner; she had wanted more.
This wasn’t more. It was just manipulation.
When she slammed her locker shut, Jason appeared in her vision, his eyes wide with surprise. Maya nearly let her stack of books fall to the ground in her own shock.
“Sorry, I guess lurking behind your locker door isn’t the best way to say good morning.”
He teased her in that easygoing way of his, his dark eyes shining as he smiled.
“I’d offer to carry your books for you, but I kind of have my hands full myself.”
Jason looked down at the pile of books he held, and Maya couldn’t help but laugh. If what Conner said last night was true, Jason was interested in her, and while she didn’t want to encourage him, it felt good to just be with him, without worrying if he was playing her for one reason or another.
Like a job.
“It’s nice of you to offer, so thanks for that. I just hope we don’t have to haul this weight in books when we’re in college,” she admitted, relieved to hear her voice sound normal. “I think a lot of stuff is online now, so there’s that to look forward to.”
She stepped up beside him and they began to walk down the hall together. There was no mistaking the looks of interest from practically everyone they passed, who were used to seeing her with Conner. Jason usually had his share of attention from girls, just like Conner did, so Maya wasn’t surprised that some of the looks coming her way were less than friendly.
Come to think of it, she wondered, why didn’t Jason have a girlfriend? She was sure there had been rumors about him with different girls over the past few years, but for him to end up at the end of senior year with no one to take to prom, a sure date like a girlfriend, was strange.
“Can I ask you something? Sort of personal?”
She ventured the question, knowing that as open as Jason was, he would most likely answer yes. Sure enough, he nodded, his expression untroubled. When Maya shifted her gaze forward, she saw Conner walking towards them, two girls on his right chattering and tugging on his arm. He was staring straight at her, though, as if they didn’t exist.
Maya looked down and tried to remember what she was going to ask Jason. It came to her just as he spoke, and the two of them started talking at the same time. She had to laugh, and wondered if Conner was still watching her.
It didn’t matter. The important thing was that they had agreed to do whatever it took to make prom night good for their dates, so they would have to get along. She would have to put Friday night behind her for good.
Even that kiss.
“Sorry, I was just thinking of how to phrase the question. I was just curious, although it’s none of my business, why you don’t have a girlfriend. You’re popular, and a lot of girls like you, so . . .”
She trailed off, hoping she didn’t come across as too nosy. Jason shrugged and didn’t take more than a few seconds before answering.
“Had a bad breakup before Christmas. I guess I just had a full plate, and a lot of things on my mind. College, exams, all of that. You know. I didn’t want to get distracted by another relationship, and I wasn’t really interested in any of the girls who wanted to go out with me. I think if the right girl had been interested, I might have taken a chance.”
Conner suddenly stood in front of them, and Jason reached out to clasp hands with him, as Maya found herself unable to stop staring at the two girls, who were glaring at her in return. Now that she thought of it, Maya considered that hanging out with Conner and now Jason, the two hottest boys in the school, might be cause for jealousy.
She turned to Jason with the biggest smile she could manage.
“I have to go. I’ll see you guys at lunch, okay?”
Leaving both boys behind, she started walking down the wrong hall, ensuring that she would be late for first period, not caring the least bit as she did so.
What was Maya doing? First, flirting with Jason right in front of him, and now, wandering down the hall in the complete opposite direction from her first class.
“You tired or what?”
Jason’s voice cut through his thoughts, and he focused on his friend as he realized that the girls beside him had stepped nearly between them, and were now looking from Jason to him with narrowed eyes. They didn’t seem mad, though.
“I heard you’re going to prom with Maya, Jason.”
“And I heard you’re going with Kaylie.”
They sounded like they had rehearsed these sort of accusations, which seemed more like questions, as if they were rooting out more information about what they knew as facts.
“True story, ladies. Now I think we better head to class. Wouldn’t want you two to be late, either.” Jason’s words were both polite and dismissive, and the girls giggled nervously before they walked away.
“Why does everyone care what we’re doing? I’ve never understood that. I mean, we play some good ball, that’s about it.”
Jason had a handle on talking this morning, Conner thought. Which was good, because he sure as heck didn’t. He made an effort to laugh, but it sounded more like a cough, and Jason frowned.
“You aren’t sick are you? You sound like one of those seals at the zoo.”
Conner immediately thought of the time he and Maya volunteered at the zoo one summer, before she started her babysitting job. She had loved to watch the seals glide in the water, and he had laughed at how they seemed to yell at each other with their honking voices.
“I don’t know what’s going on, but it’s like you and Maya are different people today. Did something happen?” Jason asked, just as they neared the classroom they shared for first period.
Before Conner could answer, the bell rang, and they had just made it into the room. He shook his head, and Jason nodded to show that he understood. Conner hoped that Jason believed him, but if he didn’t, Jason didn’t seem too concerned. It’s not like he suspected that Conner and Maya had been kissing each other only a few days ago.
Conner resisted the urge to smack himself in the head. He had to keep his mind off Maya and that kiss, and he didn’t want to think about walking to the library after school and working with her all afternoon and evening.
“Will you be joining us this morning, Conner?”
The teacher, who had been making comments about senioritis since January, turned his snarky tone on Conner, just as Conner realized he was still standing by the door, and everyone else was in their seats. There were a few whispers as he smiled, taking it in stride, but everyone returned his smile as he walked by, no one daring or even wanting to say anything negative to him.
He had never experienced anything but adulation since he proved himself on the basketball court. At least not until Maya started in on him lately.
He watched the teacher swipe a marker over the Smart Board, his mind wandering back to the exchange of words he had shared with his best friend Friday night. Why did Maya think he had kissed her to convince her to let him have the library job? Of course, he was hoping she would realize that he was a better fit for the job, if only marginally, and that she wouldn’t keep competing with him over it.
Wasn’t their friendship more important to her than a job?
She had seemed upset when Conner told her that Jason wanted to date her, but this morning she was smiling and happy when Conner had seen them together. He wished he hadn’t run into them.