by Kaye Blue
“It’ll be an adjustment. Not having somebody to watch my back,” he said.
“You’ll handle it. You always do. And I’ll be there to watch your back. Always,” I said.
Ezekiel looked at me again then turned his eyes back to the road and kept driving.
He didn’t say anything else, because there was nothing else to say. No need for a giant conversation, any kind of bullshit. I had been able to count on Ezekiel, and he would be able to count on me. It was a simple as that.
And while I could tell he wasn’t happy about it, he accepted that.
“You got it from here?” he asked as we pulled up to a hotel where I had stashed my own car.
“I’m good,” I said.
See you around then,” he responded.
“See you.”
I got out of the car, nodded at Ezekiel, and watched as he drove off. Somehow, I knew that wasn’t the last I’d see of him.
I went to the hotel room and took my time showering, wiping off the grime on my body just as it felt like I had removed the grime from my soul.
By the time I finished, redressed, and went back to the SUV, I felt like a different person.
I had fulfilled that promise to my mother, had gotten justice for her, my father, for myself.
I felt the weight of that burden lifting.
Sometimes, rarely, but sometimes, I had allowed myself to think about what would happen after.
Or tried to, anyway. To be ready for it, no matter what it was.
My mind hadn’t cooperated, knowing that after wasn’t a thing. There was only the next moment, the next, the one that would lead me to Vlad’s death, vengeance for my parents.
I hadn’t been able to see anything past that, but I did now.
What I saw was a life, the life that I so desperately wanted with her.
A life I wasn’t sure I could have.
I drove to the safe house, eager to see her but also not.
I’d known this moment was coming, but now that it was here, I was left to try to deal with it.
To try to contemplate what would happen now.
When I entered, my gaze was immediately drawn to where she sat on the sofa.
The relief, the love, I felt when I looked at her was overpowering, and more than anything I wanted to run to her, hold her close.
But I moved tentatively, didn’t rush, mostly because I was nervous about how she would receive me.
I shouldn’t have been.
I closed and locked the door, and when I turned, she had stood, rushed over to me.
She stared at me, her eyes searching my face, and then finally she wrapped her arms tight around my shoulders.
She had to stand on her tiptoes, and she did, held me and squeezed me like she couldn’t quite believe I was real.
A warm reception, one that I hadn’t anticipated, but one that I welcomed.
“I knew you would be back,” she whispered, sounding like she was confirming that to herself as opposed to speaking to me.
“I made you a promise,” I said.
She dropped her arms, then stared at me, a smile playing around her lips.
“That you did.”
“What is it?” I asked a moment later.
She looked at me pensively, her expression one I couldn’t quite read.
“I’m so glad you’re back,” she whispered.
“I am too.”
She reached up, held me again, but this time it was different.
What had been between us, simmering, had been turned up, was now full boil.
When she touched me now, it was with reverence, passion, feelings that I returned.
I lifted her, feeling her weight in my arms, her body against mine.
Knew that nothing would ever compare to it.
I carried her to the bedroom and took my time undressing her.
I peeled her clothing off slowly, as she did mine, touching every inch of skin as it was bared to me, trying to remember her, wanting to absorb as much of her as I could.
“I need you, Aras,” she whispered.
I needed her too, knew her in ways that I didn’t understand, couldn’t deny.
“I’m yours,” I whispered.
But I answered her, the connection solid, deep, one that I knew would last forever.
Lake
“Can I ask you a question?” I said much, much later.
“Anything,” he responded, his arms still tight around me.
Though I was sure he meant it, I didn’t speak immediately, not sure that I wanted to, then deciding that I did. I trusted this man, loved him with everything I had. I was brave enough to ask.
“Why?” I said.
“Why what?” he whispered, his eyes dark yet patient as he stared at me.
“After you took me from the townhouse,” I started, unwilling to say Vlad’s name ever again, “why didn’t you hurt me? Why did you keep me around?”
He lowered his eyes, his expression changing. But then he met my eyes again.
“The very first time I saw you, I felt…something. I tried to ignore it, tried to fight it, but it was always there,” he said.
He broke off then gave me a soft smile before he started again.
“It took me a long time to figure out what it was.”
“And what was it?” I asked, my voice low, my heart thudding.
“Love,” he said simply.
I didn’t speak, too shocked by his words to form my own. I wanted to believe, did believe him, but wondered if it could be that simple after all we’d gone through.
“What now?” he asked, a long moment later.
“I don’t know,” I whispered, finally finding the voice to say words, though not the ones that were in my heart.
He’d been leisurely stroking my arm, but then stopped.
“What do you want?” he asked.
You.
But I didn’t say that, for some reason couldn’t.
He seemed to sense my reluctance, and he leaned forward, kissed me gently, his acceptance, his love, clear in his eyes.
“Lake, can I tell you what I want?”
There was a vulnerability to him, but also strength.
“Yes,” I answered. “I’d like that very much.”
“My own place in the woods, in the quiet. No neighbors. Secluded, peaceful. I want to live there with you, some books, maybe someday, some babies. But you know what I want more than that?”
I shook my head, still unable to speak, my emotions clogging my throat.
“I want you to be happy. I want you to have the life that was stolen from you. Even if it doesn’t include me,” he said.
He looked off for a moment, then looked at me again, swallowed.
I didn’t respond immediately, not trusting myself to speak.
A part of me couldn’t believe it, couldn’t wrap around the idea that his feelings ran as deep as mine did. But then I remembered, how I’d felt deep down the first moment I’d seen him. How he looked at me, touched me, cared for, protected me as no one ever had, ever would.
In the blink of an eye, that disbelief fell away. My heart was at peace, filled to overflowing with the love I felt for this man.
“I love you too, Aras,” I said.
Saying words out loud was scary, but once I spoke, saw his face, I knew that they were right.
“And I want that life with you. The peace, the books, the babies. That’s the life I want. You’re the life I want,” I said.
My voice grew stronger with every word, and by the time I was done, I knew he could hear my conviction, my sincerity.
My love.
He proved his own again when he kissed me.
Epilogue
Aras
One year later
I curved my hand against Lake’s stomach, smiling when I felt what I thought was a kick. Lake said it was too soon, but I liked to believe my son could sense me.
After lingering for another moment, I got out of bed and quic
kly dressed, then looked back at Lake where she slept, making sure she hadn’t been disturbed.
Once I was certain she hadn’t, I quietly closed the door.
We had only lived in this new place for two weeks, but I was familiar with every inch of it.
It had been built exactly to my specifications, and as always, I had made sure I wouldn’t be caught by surprise.
But it seemed the man who was currently approaching wasn’t concerned about surprise.
In fact, he walked right up to the door.
Something I would expect from Ezekiel, but not from this visitor.
I pulled the door open, met his eyes.
Eyes that were quite different than they’d been the last time I saw him.
“Come in,” I said, stepping aside.
If he was surprised by my invitation, he didn’t show it.
Instead, he stepped in and quickly glanced around the house.
“Your new house?” he said.
“Yes. I guess I shouldn’t ask how you found it.”
“You could ask, but it isn’t important.”
“And what is?”
“That I did find it. That I cared enough to make sure I knew where you were,” he said.
“So, you handled all the trouble. Consolidated power and took your father’s place.”
“I did. It took some time, a lot of deaths, but people know who’s boss now.”
I couldn’t interpret his reaction to that statement. But I wasn’t surprised he had been successful. I didn’t doubt that Yuri had been training him for the moment he would take over, and despite his time away, that wasn’t something he would forget.
Just like he wouldn’t forget that I was responsible for his father’s death.
“So now that you have the organization in hand, you’ve come to settle all debts?” I asked.
“You don’t seem concerned about that.”
“No reason to be concerned. If that’s what you’re here for, I’m prepared.”
“And what I’m here for something else?”
“Depends on what it is,” I said.
“You could have killed my father, taken the business for yourself.”
“Wasn’t interested,” I responded.
“But you didn’t kill me. Why?”
“Yuri asked me the same question,” I said.
“What was your answer?” he responded, a flash of emotion crossing his face before he pushed it away.
I wondered at that, how it felt to respect, if not love, Yuri, how he felt now that he was face-to-face with his father’s killer.
“Because you didn’t deserve to die for something that you didn’t do.”
“For most people, deserve doesn’t matter.”
“It matters to me.”
“And my father, he owed you?”
“He did.”
“I can imagine how many other people he owed. Can imagine how many people I will owe when my time comes,” Ivan said.
He seemed certain of that, to accept it for truth, which was slightly sad but his clear-headedness was admirable.
“You’re being honest. I wasn’t expecting that,” he said.
“What were you expecting?” I asked.
“I was expecting you to spew some bullshit that would make it that much easier to splatter your brains across the wall,” he said.
“Well, in that case, I’m happy to disappoint.”
“But you know it’s not that easy,” he went on, his expression, which had been momentarily wistful, sharp, serious again.
“Nothing is.”
“I shouldn’t even be having this conversation with you. For what you did, I should take your life, and the lives of everyone you have ever loved.”
“But,” I said, ignoring the way my heartbeat kicked up. Nothing would happen to Lake; I wouldn’t allow it. But even the thought of her coming to harm put me on alert.
He left out a deep breath. “But you spared me when you didn’t have to. That deserves consideration.”
“Meaning?”
“Meaning I’m not going to kill you,” he said.
“But.”
“But,” he said, his dark eyes taking on an edge, a lethal look, a maturity that hadn’t been there a year ago. “You owe me. It may be tomorrow, it may be twenty years from now. But I will collect.”
“So be it,” I said.
He was silent for several long moments, but then nodded. The air in the room shifted, got less tense, and I watched Ivan as he looked around the living room.
“Place looks really homey,” he said, reminding me for a moment of the boy I’d met a year ago.
“Thanks.”
I didn’t say anything else, and after a moment, Ivan nodded again.
“Take care of yourself, Aras,” he said as he walked toward the front door.
I stayed in the living room for several minutes longer, wanting to make sure Ivan was gone, but mostly to calm myself. I wasn’t afraid, knew that I could handle whatever might come, but that old alertness was hard to shake.
Once I was finally calm, I went back to the bedroom, and wrapped my arms around Lake, once again at ease when I touched her again. Her breath was even, but I knew she wasn’t sleeping. Had that confirmed when she ran her fingers down my forearm.
I grabbed her hand, traced her fingers with mine.
“Your fingers okay?” I asked. Other than a few scars that faded more every day, there was no outward sign of what had happened to her. She told me she was okay, but I still worried.
“Fine. They feel good, don’t give me any problems at all. Because of you,” she said.
We lay in silence for a few moments longer, then she snuggled deeper into my arms, tightened her hand around mine.
“Trouble?” she whispered.
“No,” I responded, kissing her neck as I rubbed her stomach again.
It was true.
I was sure I would see Ivan again, but he wasn’t a danger to us. I breathed out deep, feeling completely at peace.
“Good,” she said, turning in my arms.
When I locked eyes with her, I saw the love that made my heart swell to bursting reflected back at me.
She turned her lips up softly, reached up and brushed her fingers against my cheek.
“Do you want to start painting the nursery tomorrow?” she asked.
“Sure. I have the paint,” I responded, my voice deepening with emotion.
Lake brushed her lips against mine and smiled again.
“So all in all, things didn’t turn out so bad, eh?” she said, her voice light, her eyes shining.
Where I had come from, what I had been through, all of it had led me here, to Lake, our child, to a future I knew would be filled with happiness.
Love.
Instead of answering, I smiled and then kissed her.
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