Leviathan's Lament

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Leviathan's Lament Page 12

by Kaye Draper


  Ethan blushed at that, his eyes darting toward Grey’s blanket-covered lap and away. “Oh.”

  Grey chuckled, trying to play it off, but secretly, it fucking hurt. He had spent four years trapped in this damned body wishing he could just be a girl, constantly worrying about what people thought and what he could and couldn’t have in his life a man. The fact that he had just sorted things out with Ethan—who was straight—was just icing on the fucking cake.

  “I’m sorry,” Grey muttered, looking down at his hands. “Just, like...avert your eyes or something and I’ll find some clothes.”

  Ethan slipped a finger under Grey’s chin and forced him to look up, tilting his head toward Ethan so the hot blond could press a soft kiss to his lips. “Stop that,” he said when he pulled away. “I know it’s still you in there, Grace. If you recall, I did hit on you when you were a guy. I might have been confused, and uncomfortable, and probably a little influenced by your magic—and yeah,” he said rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment, “I’m not saying I don’t want that amazing woman who was in my bed last night back...but I’m not gonna freak out, and suddenly go all homophobic on you, okay? Have a little faith in me, man.”

  Grey huffed. “You’re too good to exist. Definitely too good for me.” He hesitated a second, then leaned in to press another kiss to Ethan’s soft lips. “Can I borrow some clothes, though? I really want coffee before I try to figure this shit out, and I’m not wandering the townhouse with the Cosmic Joke flapping around.”

  Ethan quirked a brow at him. “The Cosmic Joke? Did you...are you saying you named your dick?”

  Grey rolled his eye and stood, faking bravery as he let the blankets drop, exposing his flagging morning wood, which was roughly the size of a fucking redwood and even more comical on his small frame.

  Ethan turned so red Grey half-wished he had a camera to capture the moment. “Oh,” he choked out, getting out of bed himself to go find them each some boxers, pajama pants, and a t-shirt.

  Grey rolled up the pantlegs of his borrowed flannel pants, thankful the t-shirt Ethan gave him was so big it hung down enough to give everything an extra layer of protection.

  He silently tried to shift back to female the entire time, to no avail. Gods damn it.

  “Well,” Ethan said as he opened the door and ushered Grey out into the hallway. “I had hoped we’d have a fun morning together. I guess I need to be more specific when I wish for things. I’m sure this is someone’s definition of fun. Somewhere.”

  Grey slugged him in the arm and Ethan grinned, rubbing the tree tattoo he always used as a worry stone.

  Grey sighed. “Don’t worry, it’s not permanent. I don’t think. I’m pretty sure my asshole mother gave me the ability to shift back and forth. But you know, why would anyone ever think to tell me how to use magic before they just dumped it on me?”

  Ethan patted Grey’s back in sympathy. “Try being a human and having to just sit back and watch the show and do nothing.”

  Grey gave him a wry smile. Yeah, that would suck...like, say, going to bed with a woman and walking up with a man when you weren’t even into that, level of suck.

  They were making coffee when the leviathan drifted in, clothed in a pair of borrowed sweats and a tank that someone had given him. The clothes just looked wrong on his ethereal form. His hair was loose, and it spilled around him like a sparkling waterfall. The early morning light seemed to enhance the shimmering silver markings on his skin...and here Grey stood in a scrawny male body wearing clothes that were several sizes too big. It just wasn’t fair.

  “Hey, Levi,” Grey managed, mustering up a big fake smile. “Coffee?”

  The sea monster paced closer, tilting his head to examine Grey. “Good morning, master. I see you finally shifted. This form is as lovely as your female form. May I have cream in my coffee, please?”

  Grey blinked at him. “You knew I could do this?” He gestured at his new body.

  Leviathan just shrugged. “Of course. I’m a creature of powerful magic, child, and one who can shapeshift myself. How would I not notice you have the ability to change your form?”

  The sea monster glanced at Ethan. “Oh. Was this a secret?”

  Grey rolled his eyes as he went about adding creamer to a mug of coffee and handed it off to the weirdo. “Well, yeah . I don’t even know how I did it the first time. Mostly.” He tried his best not to blush because he’d done it so Luca could know what it was like to have sex with this version of himself, but no way was he going to say it out loud. “What I would like to know is how the hell to shift back! I’m stuck.”

  Leviathan tilted his head. “You have not shifted in a long time?”

  At Grey’s raised eyebrows, the starry-eyed asshole rolled his eyes. “Well, what do you expect, then?”

  When Grey just gave him a blank look, he sighed. “You must change forms occasionally, or your body will take over and do it for you. It is...confining...to be stuck in one shape for so long when one is not your natural way of being. It’s unnatural.”

  Grey’s head was starting to hurt. He waved a hand at the know-it-all creature before him. “Well, then why are you human...ish...all the time? Shouldn’t you have to turn into...whatever you really are?”

  The leviathan sipped his coffee and leveled a look at Grey that made him shiver, those fathomless eyes unsettling and...magnetic...all at once. “ I am thousands of years old, while you are still developing magically. I am more powerful than nearly any force on this plane. I am less at the whims of my body. However, yes, I will need to return to the ocean eventually and shift. I had just assumed you would prefer no one see a sea monster swimming along the coast at the moment.”

  Grey gulped down his own coffee, hissing when he realized it was way too hot. “Got it.”

  The leviathan ruffled Grey’s tangled, now chestnut brown, curls. “You feel better today, after feeding and shifting, yes?”

  Grey felt his face turn a flaming red at the mention of feeding , and he refused to look at Ethan who had turned away to work on cooking breakfast. “Yep. I feel amazing. Except for the dick.”

  Those galaxy eye traveled downward over Grey’s body. “Is there something wrong with your reproductive organs?” He sounded like a mechanic about to take a look under the hood.

  Grey wanted the earth to open up and swallow him, right then and there. He scrubbed a hand over his face. “Nope. Works great, thanks. I just prefer to be female.”

  That got him another curious, deep-searching look. “Do you?”

  Then the weirdo turned away and went to see what Ethan was doing, asking questions and making food requests as if it was any other day.

  Grey slumped onto a barstool and nursed his coffee.

  “Morning, Eth. Can I have my girlfriend back n—” Luca’s friendly, teasing voice trailed off as she entered the kitchen and got a good look at who was seated at the bar. Then she cleared her throat and went to the coffee pot. “So...good night last night, then?”

  Grey huffed out a laugh. “Last night was fine—” He paused when Ethan snorted and gave him a wink before he went back to scrambling the eggs. “Okay, yeah, last night was great .” Fuck, why was she constantly having to talk about her sex life? “It’s this morning that blows.”

  Luca came over and ran her hand through Grey’s hair. “Whatever it is, we’ll handle it. Together.” She stole a kiss and slid onto the barstool beside Grey, looking as calm and collected and steady as ever.

  Grey had just finished explaining to Luca what Levi had said about changing forms, when Matheus wandered in. The bassist was unusually sleep-rumpled and looked crankier than even he usually looked. He stopped dead on his way to the coffee maker, turned back around, and marched up to Grey. Grey sat up as those hazel eyes bore into his, searching, filled with an odd combination of wonder, hope, and anger. “Well this is fucking new,” he said softly. Then he crushed his lips to Grey’s, nearly knocking him off the barstool before he wrapped his long arms around Gre
y’s waist to keep him from going over. He pulled back, leaving behind the taste of mint toothpaste and Matheus. “I’m probably going to be so pissed at you for keeping secrets, aren’t I?”

  Grey nodded, feeling breathless, wondering what the fuck that had been about. That was an I missed you kiss. He resisted the urge to reel Mat back in, and picked up his coffee cup instead. “Uh, yeah. Probably.”

  Mat ruffled his hair and went back to getting coffee, whistling an airy tune.

  Grey looked around to find everyone else staring at him. “What?”

  The leviathan broke the silence that stretched out, touching Grey’s shoulder to get Grey to look at him. “There’s a human woman outside the house.”

  The doorbell rang a beat later and Grey and the rest of Lucifer shared a panicked look. “Oh fuck,” Grey whispered. “George.”

  Their manager was supposed to stop by this morning to talk about details for their mainland tour. She could not see Grey like this. Or the blue guy.

  “Come on,” Grey said, leaping off his stool and grabbing Leviathan by the wrist, both of them sloshing coffee everywhere. “We need to hide.” He tossed a look over his shoulder at the rest of them as he hurried out of the kitchen. “You fuckers act natural. Say I’m sick, or dead, or something...I don’t know.”

  Luca sighed. “Grey went to visit her dad. Oops. We forgot you were coming by.” She waved Grey away and he went, dragging the sea monster along with him.

  When they reached Grey’s bedroom, he closed and locked the door, then leaned against it. Leviathan was watching him with amusement. “Mortals are so strange.”

  Grey crossed the room and sat on the edge of his bed, pausing to set his coffee cup on the nightstand before he flopped backward to lie down, his feet still on the floor. “Tell me about it.”

  The bed dipped slightly as the sea monster sat down beside him. “You did not possess this ability to shift before the curse was placed on the island?”

  Grey sighed. “Nope. I was a girl right up until I wasn’t anymore.” He hesitated, then decided why even attempt to withhold info anymore? This guy was already witnessing Grey’s entire shitshow of a life like it was some sort of reality TV show. “When my mom agreed to break the curse, I asked her to let the people who are trans choose their gender. Some stayed, some swapped back...and a handful of men who hadn’t been affected before turned into women. She said...she said that she could ‘see into people’s hearts’ or some shit. And she said something about giving me a gift.” Grey flung his hand up in disgust. “Then I discover I can now change genders at will. Sort of.”

  The sea monster finished his coffee and leaned over Grey to set the cup on the nightstand, then he just...stayed that way, looming over Grey, his long hair falling around them like a shimmery curtain as his eyes delved into Grey’s. “Clearly your heart did not wish to be constrained to just one option.”

  Grey blinked up at him, feeling entirely too seen by those galaxy eyes, set in that beautiful, alien face. “Ha.”

  A soft hand traced the outline of Grey’s face, which in this form he knew was more heart-shaped than oval, prettier than his girl face, in a lot of ways. Great boy band material, according to George.

  The weird blue creature sighed. “You fight so hard to be all the things you think you should be, my strange new master. But have you ever thought of just...embracing everything you are instead ?”

  Grey shivered under that touch, at the steady current of magic he could feel flowing under the other guy’s skin. “If only it was that easy.”

  The leviathan smiled, slow and wicked, his perfect lips revealing sharp teeth. “It is.” He straightened, leaving Grey lying there with his heart pounding like a frightened rabbit. “Do you know why you were able to wake me from the prison of my spelled sleep?”

  Grey sat up, feeling a slurry of emotions, none of which made even a tiny bit of sense. He wanted to bury his head in the sand. He wanted to cry. Punch something. Find his lovers and taste them all, reassure himself they still wanted him, that they still belonged to him. He wanted the leviathan of fucking legends to not think he was a complete idiot, maybe pull Grey close and pet his hair again. Gods, what a mess. And speaking of Gods ...he kind of wanted to cunt-punch a few of those assholes for every bit of weirdness they had unleashed on mankind. Instead, he slumped and let out a tired sigh. “No, Levi,” he answered the ancient monster who sat beside him on his bed. “I have no fucking clue.”

  That soft hand returned to touch Grey’s cheek, to lift Grey’s chin so he could look into those galaxy eyes, so he could see the way they glowed as the leviathan smirked. “Call me that name again and I’ll tell you.”

  Grey laughed in surprise. “Name? What—Levi?”

  That earned him another slow, evil smile. “Yes. I quite like having a human name. Thank you.” His fingers gripped Grey’s chin tighter, biting in a little as his smile turned colder. “You have a stronger link to me than the gods or mortals who have tried to make me part of their petty little games over the ages...because my blood runs through your veins.”

  Grey blinked at him. “Your...my...we’re related? ”

  Levi released him, his expression losing its sharp edge. “I suppose, in a way. Sometimes, after the gods destroyed the only other of my kind and left me to swim the seas alone, I would yearn for connection. Very rarely—maybe a handful of times in the thousands of years I’ve been alive—I would don this form and seek out companionship. He smiled fondly. “The last time I recall was with a fisherman and his wife. Kind people, willing to dally with a monster for a fortnight or two.” He shrugged. “Of course I made sure they wouldn’t remember me when I was gone. Perhaps offspring were more of a possibility than I thought.”

  Grey shook his head, feeling like the shit just kept getting stacked deeper and deeper. “So you’re like...my grandpa or something?” And Grey was forced to admit he was, ever so slightly, maybe... attracted to his fucking great-great-grandpappy. Wonderful.

  Levi just laughed. “I’m no more your relative in that sense than the first cave creatures who copulated on a rock and gave birth to the human race.” He waved a graceful hand at Grey. “But the magic in me is strong, and it found its way to you. I am a part of you. And you are a part of me.”

  Grey swallowed, his brain just about done trying to deal with all the weird. “That’s...unsettling.”

  Levi patted him on the back. “Not nearly as unsettling as the moment I felt you take hold of that stone you wear round your neck.” Grey was surprised at the wry, humorous expression that crossed the creature’s lips. “I thought the gods had finally found a way to end me or subjugate me for certain this time.”

  Grey gaped at him, feeling just an inkling of that remembered panic. “Why are you telling me this?”

  Levi stood to pace across the room, squaring his shoulders and doing haughty like only he could. “You seemed distraught. I thought perhaps you would be less scatter-brained if you knew that no matter what happens with all this small, mortal-realm nonsense like your lovers or your band...you’ll never be helpless or alone. I will ensure it.”

  The glistening fangs that accompanied his smile were not exactly comforting. But Grey appreciated the effort.

  Chapter 19

  George was at the townhouse for-freaking- ever . Grey stayed holed up in his bedroom with Levi the entire time. At first, he felt antsy and desperate to be free. But as time dragged on, he got comfortable and actually enjoyed being trapped in a small space with a beautiful, terrifying mythical beast. He managed to find some sweats and a t-shirt that fit okay. The jeans were a no-go. Even if he had felt like wandering around wearing chick clothes on his male body...there was no way they’d fit. Female Grey was bigger than male grey, and way more...plump. Once clothing was handled, he used the attached half-bath to wrangle his corkscrew curls into some kind of order and wash his face and brush his teeth. Then, he went back to his room and grabbed a book to read.

  Levi was pacing around the room
picking things up and putting them down. “You seem to have a lot of romance books,” he noted idly, running a finger along the spines of Grey’s book collection.

  Grey slumped down further into the pillow fort he’d built up on his bed so he could recline while he read. “Yeah, well, I was just a teenager when The Change happened. Then suddenly I was in a male body being all awkward and trying to fit in. I never really got to date and stuff.” He shrugged. “I liked to daydream like any other girl, and all I had was stupid, whimsical romance stories, okay?”

  Levi pulled a book off the shelf and came to sit cross-legged on the bed next to Grey. “Books are rarely like real life,” he commented.

  Grey rolled his eyes, taking note of the title of the book Levi had chosen. “Well, that one’s sure as shit not like real life,” he said with a grin. Grey had a whole gamut of romance books, from fantasy, to contemporary, to whatever else you could want, low-heat, high-heat and everything in between. But the book currently gripped in those four-fingered hands was straight-up erotica. He rolled his eyes. “Do you even know how to read?”

  Levi said he had...absorbed memories from the people living on the island. His understanding of things was a strange mixture of old-fashioned and modern. He seemed to need explanations of the weirdest things, while other things seemed to make perfect sense to him.

  The sea monster lifted an eyebrow, opened the book to a random page in the middle and began reading aloud in that inhumanly deep voice. And of course it was in the middle of a particularly sloppy and graphic sex scene. Grey needed to never hear Levi say the word “juices,” ever again. It just wasn’t good for one’s sanity.

  “Okay,” he said, slapping a hand over the page to stop Levi from reading any more of the porno out loud. “Fine. You can read. Cool. Read in your head.”

  That earned him a slow, toothy smile. “But I enjoy reading to you, master. Are you certain you don’t wish me to continue?”

 

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