by J Peach
I stopped at the threshold, my eyes staring hard at my father. He was right, there was nowhere we could go without him knowing. Plus, I was tired of running from him. “You’re right, Pops. It ain’t nowhere we could go without you knowing. I’m not running from you… from how I see shit, it’s best we kill you before you do us.”
My dad turned to me as a hard burst of laughter left his mouth. “You fuckin’ better, but you a little bitch. Yo ass ain’t got the balls to kill me—”
I pulled the trigger once, hitting him square in the chest. His eyes went wide, shock clearly all over his face. He glanced down at the growing red stain on his shirt then back at me. I pulled the trigger again. His body jerked with every bullet that I pumped into him. Once the clip was empty, I dropped the gun. It wasn’t until after that moment, I heard my momma’s screams.
“Noooo! No! Oh, God! What did you do? No! Jeremy, baby, get up. It’s gonna be okay, you’re gonna be okay. Get up, Jeremy! Call the fuckin’ ambulance!” she screamed at us. “Nelly, help me get him to the car. We need to get him some help.”
Jonell didn’t move, though. The look on his face showed that he was still shocked.
“Ma, he’s dead—” I started until she cut me off.
My momma’s red eyes shot to me. Tears were rapidly streaming down her face. She grabbed the gun that I had dropped, pointed it at me, and shot. The clip was empty, though. She kept shooting as if hoping for a bullet to magically leave the chamber.
“You killed him,” she sobbed. “I hate you. He should’ve killed you.” She dropped the gun, then turned her attention back to my father. She hugged him tightly, kissing him with the busted lips he’d given her.
“Rome, we got to go.”
I felt nothing at that moment. I just stood there watching my momma break down. “He would’ve killed yo’ stupid ass one of these days. I did you a favor.”
“I didn’t ask you to do shit! What the fuck have you done? Oh, my God! No! Why didn’t you just stop… this wasn’t your fuckin’ problem, it was mine, he was mine, and you killed him! I wish it was you and not him! Get the fuck out!”
“Jonell made us run. We went to my uncle Julius’ house, but he slammed the door in our face. We couldn’t stay there because of the shit he had in his house. Plus, I had just killed his brother, so it was fuck us. Akil and Ashaun gave us some money, and we hid out at a motel for a few days before the police caught up to us. We were still bruised up bad as fuck. Jonell was so sure we weren’t gonna do any time because of self-defense or whatever, but it ain’t play like that. Our momma twisted the whole fuckin’ story, making it seem like we attacked him.
“The police knew some shit wasn’t right. Hell, the bruises we all wore showed that, but given the many times I shot my dad, it was overkill. I had time to think about doing it beforehand. They claimed I should’ve left and called the police when he was unconscious.” I explained with a shrug.
“Shid, honestly, calling the police on him would’ve been pointless. My dad knew people. The nigga would’ve been back home within hours. Killing him was the only way, so I did. Crazy thing is, though, I never felt bad about killing him, nor was I mad about the shit my momma pulled on me. The only thing that made me feel fucked up was that Nelly got pulled into it. He didn’t kill the nigga, I did. I hate that he got fucked behind my actions.” I stared at the house and nodded as if I was okaying it and myself. Looking at Janessa, I shrugged. “That’s everything.”
Janessa looked shocked, speechless. I watched as her mouth moved, trying to form words, but she just couldn’t seem to get shit out.
“Yeah, my family life wasn’t normal.” Putting the truck in drive, I pulled off.
“I’m sorry… I really don’t know what to say. I just…” She babbled. “Wow.”
“Yeah, that could sum it up.” I chuckled at how speechless she was.
Janessa’s hand covered mine. “I’m sorry y’all had to go through that, Jerome.” I shrugged at what she said. A heavy breath left her mouth, and she squeezed my hand. “I now see why you didn’t want to talk about that or have to relive that,” she exclaimed.
My brows furrowed at what she said. My eyes shifted from the road to her, only to find that she was already staring at me. “I don’t have a problem with talking about what happened. Shid, I did what I did. I’m not ashamed of that.”
She seemed confused by my confession. “Then why did you snap the way you did earlier? I mean, I can understand now, so you don’t have to pretend like you don’t care about what happened.”
A humorless laugh left my mouth. “Sweetheart, you misunderstand. My attitude wasn’t about talking about this shit, it was because of you.” My hand pressed against my chest. “I’m empty inside, don’t feel shit or care about too much of nothing. I haven’t for a long ass time. But since I done met you, the shit has been different, weird. I don’t like the fact that I wanna confide in you and tell yo’ ass shit. I don’t like these feelings. It fucks with my judgment when it comes to you, and that’s dangerous for both of us.”
Janessa turned to face me, her fingers entwining with mine. The red tint to her cheeks showed that my words thrilled her. She licked her lips as a smile came to them. “You’re telling me…” Janessa’s teeth gripped her bottom lip as her smile widened. “This morning’s blowout was because I make you feel something? Not because you had to relive that whole traumatic experience?”
Once she repeated it back to me, maybe it was fucked up or twisted in some type of way. I shrugged. “That’s exactly what I said.”
She opened then closed her mouth before laughing. “Jerome, you are so… strange.” She said the word as if it was wrong. “Different.” Bringing my hand to her mouth, she kissed it. “Thanks for telling me that, not about your folks, but the truth.” She brought her free hand to the center of my chest, stroking over my heart. “I like the idea that I make you feel something different. I get your reaction because you don’t want the feeling. Jerome, I’d rather you tell me what’s up than to have you just snap off, leaving me confused. I’m more understanding than you think, and if you want to step back from this,” she motioned between us, “to get yourself in check, then tell me that, and I’ll give you some space. Bet?”
At the word bet, I looked over at her and saw that she was smiling. Laughing, I nodded in agreement. “Yeah, bet.”
Her fist was suddenly in front of me. The action only made me laugh a bit harder. Shaking my head, I bumped her fist.
Janessa was definitely wrapping a nigga around her damn fingers.
“Rochelle, you already know Nya from the dance studio. Have you met Yonni and Sha?” I pointed to the twins as we sat on the couch.
The girls had called several hours ago, inviting me out for a drink at The Lion’s Den. I agreed because I really didn’t feel like being stuck in the house. Rochelle had shown up to the house a few minutes after I got the invite, and I asked if I could bring a friend. Nya didn’t have a problem with it.
“Yeah, I’ve seen them at the studio.” Rochelle nodded, waving at the twins.
“How you two know each other?” Sha asked, pointing between Rochelle and me.
“We work together. Once we met, we sort of just clicked after that.” I nudged Rochelle with my shoulder, making her chuckle.
Rochelle nodded in agreement. “She told me how y’all had her back with those two bitches. Thanks for looking out for her.”
Nya waved her off before smiling at me. “No thanks needed. Hell, she’s part of the family.”
“Right,” Yonni chimed in, smiling as well. “That was part of her initiation,” she claimed, making us all laugh. “No, but seriously, shid, Nessa handled that shit on her own.”
“She sure in the fuck did. When shorty says, ‘I don’t feel like it,’ just leave it alone and walk away.” Sha burst out laughing.
Nya hit her friend. “You so stupid. Oh, and Nessa, you’re on a two-drink maximum tonight.” She pointed to my glass.
My bro
ws rose at the limitation. “Wait, why only two drinks?”
“Those were the orders, by your man. Otherwise, we couldn’t hang with you. He seems to think we’re bad influences on you, all because yo’ ass got into a fight,” Nya said, pointing to Sha and Yonni on the sly.
I burst out laughing as I read her lips. Jerome thought Sha and Yonni were bad influences. “That man done lost his mind. I know y’all didn’t plan on listening to him.” I stared at the three of them.
Sha raised her hand. “I do. He kind of scares me. So, don’t get no more than two drinks in front of me. Like, he got this whole—I’ll knock the shit out of you for no reason—look to him. I don’t have time to be arguing or fighting with no nigga behind his grown ass woman’s decision.” Sha’yonna rolled her eyes hard with her explanation, making us laugh.
I couldn’t even defend Jerome’s attitude because that’s exactly how he was. Although, he wouldn’t hit her, but he’d definitely lay out some choice words that could feel like a damn blow. “But, he’s really sweet—”
“To yo’ ass, yeah, because y’all fuckin’, so you don’t even count,” Sha cut in as if stating a matter of fact.
Nya laughed and pointed to herself. “He’s nice to me, though, and I ain’t fuckin’ him.” She shrugged.
I burst out laughing. “Nya, oh trust, he would definitely try you if he knew you’d let him and if you weren’t married to his cousin,” I clarified.
She laughed and shrugged. “Point is, he’s not bad. He’s really sweet, honestly.” I nodded in agreement with that.
“But I know my limit, and I’m not trying to get wasted off my ass. It was fun the first time, but…” my head shook. “I’m not trying to get like that again.” I did not want a repeat of our first girl’s night out. “I’m ready to dance.”
Yonni was the first one off the couch. “Me too, come on.” She held her hand out for me, and I gladly took it. “Come on, y’all!” she yelled to her sister and Nya. I had already taken Rochelle’s hand and was pulling her along.
Once we made it to the lower level, we pushed through the crowd to the middle of the floor and started dancing. It didn’t take long for dudes to ease their way into our space and start dancing with us.
I was having a fuckin’ blast. There wasn’t a worry on my mind or an ounce of stress in my body. I was able to be myself without a care, and I loved that. Rochelle pulled me from the guy I was dancing with and started grinding against me. I didn’t mind it and began to dance in tune with her. Yonni soon came up behind me and smacked my ass. I broke out laughing as I danced on her.
We had danced through several songs before the heat of the crowd started getting to me. My damn throat felt sore and dry from all the laughing and yelling I had done. Regardless of that, my body was on a high, one I didn’t want to come down from, and I wasn’t even drunk.
“I’m about to get a drink. Y’all want something?” I asked them.
“I’ll come with you,” Rochelle offered.
Nya grabbed my arm and stopped me. “We can go to the bar upstairs. My damn feet are killing me,” she yelled.
Laughing, I nodded. If they were going upstairs, that was the better option. “Okay, cool. We can do that. Chelly, you done dancing down here?”
She shook her head. “No, we can get our drinks from down here and finish dancing,” she suggested.
Given that I wasn’t exhausted and just a little hot and thirsty, I figured I would dance with her for a while longer. “Okay, I’ll stay down here with you.” Rochelle’s grin was wide. “Y’all go ahead. We’re gonna stay down here for a while longer until she gets tired.” I pointed to Rochelle. If she wanted to dance some more, I was cool with that. I wasn’t going to leave her alone, though.
“Okay.” Nya and the twins nodded, then walked off.
“Come on!” Rochelle grabbed my hand and pulled me off to the bar.
I got water, and she had Hennessy and Coke. We made our way back to the dance floor and started dancing once again. Chelly was all smiles as she ground against the guy behind her. Rochelle and I moved from one end of the club to the next, dancing with females and males alike. Hell, I was dancing with folks I couldn’t begin to describe. I didn’t bother looking back; I was just enjoying my time.
The excited vibe I felt moments ago started to dim from the guy behind me. His erection poking me in the back put a damper on my mood, but what really set me off was that he started to get a little too damn happy with his friendly hands.
He groped my ass and thighs, which I kept pushing his hands off me. He then started to get a bit aggressive as he grabbed my breasts while trying to force his hand between my legs.
I tried to turn around, but he held me so tight to his chest that I honestly couldn’t move. The guy was strong as hell. “Dude, let me the fuck go!” I yelled, reaching back and grabbing his dick as hard as I could.
The hard blow to the back of my head caught me off guard and sent me stumbling into someone ahead of me. Arms enclosed around my waist, holding me upright, so I wouldn’t fall to the floor.
“Nessa, are you alright?” Rochelle yelled into my ear as the guy she had been dancing with held me up.
Although my head throbbed painfully, I nodded. I didn’t know what the hell the guy hit me with, but the shit hurt like hell and dazed my ass as well. Rochelle and the guy she had been dancing with guided me through the crowd and up to the second floor.
“Here, sit her down right there,” Rochelle instructed. Once I was on the couch, she was in my face. “Are you okay? What happened?”
Nya and the twins soon crowded me as well. The trio wore concerned expressions.
“Babe, you okay? What happened?” Yonni asked and sat next to me.
“What happened to her?” Sha questioned Rochelle.
Rochelle ignored her and kept her eyes on me. My damn head was pounding something terrible. Groaning, I continued to rub the back of my head, feeling a knot starting to form.
“I’m fine. I was dancing with some dumbass who got too damn handsy.” I told them everything that happened.
“Did you see what dude looked like? We can find his ass and fuck him up,” Sha insisted.
I laughed then groaned, grabbing the back of my head. Sha was so damn aggressive and always ready to fight. That girl was a breath of fresh air to me. “I couldn’t begin to tell you how anyone looked that I’ve danced with tonight.”
“Rochelle, how did dude look?” Nya asked her.
Rochelle’s head shook, and she shrugged. “I don’t even know. The last person I saw her with was a chick, then I turned around and was dancing with him.” She pointed to the dark-skinned guy who stood over by the bar. “Babe, I’m so sorry. I should’ve been watching you harder. My eyes shouldn’t have left you.” Rochelle apologized, seeming both apologetic and concerned as her arms went around my shoulders, hugging me tightly. “He didn’t do anything else to you—”
“Aside from busting her upside the fuckin’ head?” Sha’s irritated attitude didn’t go unnoticed.
Yonni hit her sister’s leg before rolling her eyes. “Sha, chill.”
“I’m fine, Chelly, promise. He knocked the hell out of me, though. I don’t think he hit me with his damn fist. That shit was too hard, and I got a knot.” I let out a whine while rubbing my head.
“That’s so fucked up. I’m so pissed right now. We should’ve dragged yo’ ass up here with us instead of letting you stay down there. At least we would’ve seen everything.” Sha shot a direct glare at Rochelle.
“What the fuck is your problem? I had eyes on her until I turned around for a gotdamn moment—”
“And as you can see, anything can happen in a fuckin’ moment.” Sha pointed to me.
My hand waved, getting their attention. “Whoa, whoa, whoa, chill, Sha. It’s wasn’t her fault that some dumbass got handsy. This hostility isn’t needed. I’m good.” I wanted to defuse the whole situation.
I didn’t get why Sha was so pissed at Rochelle, t
o begin with. It really wasn’t her fault, nor could she have predicted what happened.
“It really is, because when we’re down there or out together in general, we never turn our backs on each other. All it takes is a second for some shit to happen. And this incident proves that if you ain’t paying attention, you don’t see shit. Plus, given how possessive yo’ ass has been over her all fuckin’ night, I would’ve thought yo’ damn eyes would’ve been trained on her ass,” Sha’yonna snapped at Rochelle.
“Sha’yonna!” Nya yelled, looking at her friend like she was crazy.
“Don’t Sha’yonna me, when you know Rochelle been acting funky like she ain’t want us around Nessa’s ass. I peeped that shit. She kept pulling Nessa away from Yonni when they were dancing. Yonni and Nessa probably didn’t notice, but I saw that shit.” Sha’s eyes rolled hard as she finished talking. “Fuck y’all, I’m getting me a drink. Y’all hoes better be watching me too just in case a bitch tries to sneak my ass.” She once again shot a pointed glare at Rochelle before walking off.
I was so damn shocked by her outburst because I didn’t notice a damn thing.
“Wow!” Rochelle mumbled then glanced at me. Immediately, her head started to shake. Once again, that apologetic look covered her features. “I swear, I wasn’t trying to be like that if it seemed that way. I thought we were all having fun. But she’s right, I should’ve been watching you closer,” she complained while hugging me again.
My eyes rolled at her. “Girl, Sha ass is drunk and talking shit. We were enjoying ourselves. You didn’t leave my side, you just turned around. I mean, we were right next to each other. Plus, it’s not like I was screaming or anything to get your attention. I was speaking loud enough for dude’s ears only. So, stop, it wasn’t on either of us,” I tried to explain, but Rochelle didn’t seem to be buying it.