“Funny? Funny! This isn’t funny, Austin. Stop laughing! Stop it!” And then we both looked at each other and burst out laughing.
I was relieved that he wasn’t mad.
But I had to be serious. “So what should we do? I don’t think people are going to believe us when we tell them the rumor isn’t true. Especially if we’re seen driving to school together.”
“I’m not sure. But we’ll figure it out together.” He paused, looking at me with his soft eyes. “Anyway, even if we could go back in time and change the situation with the Andersons so this story wouldn’t come out, I wouldn’t do it.”
The drive to school was quiet. I didn’t mind though. I was running different scenarios around in my head, mostly about how to stop Josh from destroying this wonderful, kind person who was quickly becoming my dear friend again. I glanced at him occasionally from my peripheral vision, thinking there actually were decent guys out there. Austin wasn’t anything like Josh. He was kind and thoughtful. And he’d matured since we were kids into a well-rounded human being. The old Austin that I remembered was extremely shy and afraid of everything around him. This Austin was sure of himself, strong. He had an air of quiet confidence that knew exactly what he wanted in life and didn’t care about what other people thought about him.
Just before we turned into the parking lot, I told him, “I hope this doesn’t turn out bad, but if it does, I need you to know, I’m sorry.”
“Bre, if you keep on thinking the worst, then that is what you’ll get. If you talk like you’re already defeated, then you will be. Don’t apologize because you won’t have to. Everything will be fine. I can feel it. No more worrying.” He placed his hand over mine and looked to me.
Breaking a little smile, I muttered, “Okay,” and sunk back into the seat.
“Well, here we are, the war zone,” he fired off as we turned into the parking lot of the school.
And he was right. It was a war zone waiting for us to step into battle. Standing outside were Josh, Rebecca, Trevor, Megan, Katie and what seemed to be the entire student body.
Austin drove into the nearest parking spot facing the massive crowd. It was obvious that they’d been waiting for us.
It’s at moments like these that my mind goes spiraling into a twisting cyclone. Given the innumerable situations that have dominated my life lately, I would rather be anywhere then here.
I searched my brain for possible escape routes. There were the trails that led back behind the school, through the football field into the woods. I could make a run for the school and hide in the girl’s bathroom or just turn around and run the other way. I wanted out of this mess. Unfortunately, there was no way around it. I had to face them, all of them, head on.
Everyone stared at us. Austin cut the engine, dropping his hands from the steering wheel as he sat back observing the barrier in front of us. We looked at each other and with a silent agreement opened our doors simultaneously.
Getting out of the truck was painfully difficult. I had to force myself to move my legs over the side of the seat and set both feet on the ground. I was petrified. Austin had to be as nervous as I was, though he didn’t show it. He hid it better than me, which gave me a bit of courage.
“Ready?” Austin asked, stepping beside me and closing my door.
“No…” my shoulders tighten, “but I’ll never be ready for this, so let’s just get it over with.”
We slowly approached the mob of unfriendly faces. Their stares felt like lasers finding their target. I fought hard to steer my mind away from what they’d been saying about me, the intimate details, especially when none of them knew the truth. They only loved good gossip.
Walking hesitantly onto the sidewalk, I zeroed in on the faces that mattered most in the crowd. Everyone else was a blur.
Rebecca looked remorseful, mouthing, “I’m so sorry.”
I felt a pinch in my stomach and urged myself to calm down. It seemed like she wanted to say something else but held her composure and remained silent. To her left was her boyfriend, Trevor. This one hit me hard. Trevor and I go way back, back before Rebecca, even back before Josh. Through his eyes, I was the enemy, someone who had betrayed his friend. His backpack and jacket were at his feet. His sleeves were pushed up past his elbows and he was cracking his knuckles, swaying his body from side to side. He was ready for a fight.
Katie was in the center of the line. Her chin angled down, eyes flickering with victory, and a tiny smile peaking at the corners of her mouth. It wasn’t her hateful stare that hurt me most, it was the necklace that dangled around her neck. In eighth grade we bought a friendship necklace in the shape of a heart. I took one half while she had the other, and we declared we’d be best friends forever. The fact that she was wearing it today was truly devastating. She had planned this. She wanted to hurt me. Mission accomplished.
This was a lost battle already. Megan and Josh were standing way too close to each other. I frowned. Megan looked slutty as usual and Josh looked furious.
I tried my best to even out my voice so it wouldn’t shake. “Josh, before you start, I need you to know the rumors aren’t true.”
Josh didn’t respond right away. He looked at Megan, Katie and Becka before unwrapping Megan’s arm from his, which I hadn’t notice before. He stepped forward. “Not true?” he began. “Tell me Bre, why would your best friend,” pointing his finger at Becka, “say something like this, if it wasn’t true?”
I glanced at Beck then back to Josh. “I can’t tell you that. I won’t tell you. You’ll just have to trust me. I’m not pregnant. There’s no way I could be.”
There, it was out in the open. Everyone standing around now knew the rumor, if they hadn’t already.
Josh chuckled in a cynical sort of way. “I need to trust you? I can’t believe this.” He turned to walk away. Then flipped around to confront us again, “Bre, I can’t believe you of all people would do something like this. I mean, I would expect this from someone like…well…” he paused and chuckled again, looking at Megan, “from someone like me, but you? No one does this to me. No one, Bre.” His eyes darkened.
“What do you mean someone like you?” I fired off. My eyes shot to Megan’s pleased face. This was apparently what she’d been waiting for.
Josh continued, “Come on Bre, you still don’t know by now? I mean everyone else knows that I’m a man with needs, and if you weren’t going to give it up then…”
Jumping right in, Katie said eagerly, “You told me in the car that day, and I quote, ‘We’re great thanks for asking’.”
My mouth dropped open as I put two and two together. So that’s what was behind the statement in the car that day. Katie knew all along that Josh was sneaking around behind my back with Megan. And here she was rubbing it in my face. I didn’t know how to respond to that. I felt like I just got the wind knocked out of me and I couldn’t breathe.
Austin lunged for Josh. “That’s enough!”
“What are you going to do about it, punk?” Josh warned, snapping his head up and pushing Austin back.
“Stop it!” Becka yelled.
Josh was in Austin’s face. “Boy…I warned you about staying away from what’s mine.”
I snapped. “What’s yours? See, that’s where you’re wrong Josh. I’m not yours, not anymore.”
Josh rolled his eyes, “Yeah whatever, Bre. You say that now, but we all know you’ll come running back to me tomorrow. You always do.” Arrogance flowed out of him like a burbling volcano.
I was enraged by how he flaunted his affair with Megan in front of everyone within earshot. Something rose up in me, something I never thought I was capable of.
“Not this time, Josh. We’re done.” I stood tall and raised my head. I straightened my shirt and turned to Austin, feeling stronger than I ever had before. His eyes met mine and concluded my victory. “C’mon Austin. Let’s get out of here.”
I grabbed Austin’s arm and headed for the entrance.
“Fine! Go
ahead, Austin. You can have my sloppy leftovers! I was getting tired of her anyway.”
Austin clenched his fists, turned, and charged. One of the guys standing nearby pushed Austin back, but not before he got a swipe in and caught Josh’s eyebrow.
Josh laughed at Austin’s attempt, “That’s all you got? C’mon! You want to fight? Let’s do it!”
I had done this to myself, I thought sadly. Becka had been right all along. It was transparent now. I couldn’t believe how stupid I had been to allow Josh to treat me this way and to let him do it over and over again.
I watched for a second as Josh tried un-victoriously to throw jabs at Austin. Each time Austin ducked out of the way of his swings. Ending it, Austin composed himself and returned to me.
I felt empowered and strong. I turned and stared at Josh who was basking in his victory, gloating as if his words had actually affected us. I walked back to Josh and stood right in front of him. To my surprise he took a slight step back, as if in apprehension. He looked slightly disheveled from the fight.
His brown eyes that once held me captive now felt strange and foreign. I didn’t know him at all. I was seeing him for the first time as the person he really was. From the outside looking in he was tough and above others. In this new light, he was weak, a coward. I hoped that one day he would look back on us and see that what he once had was something special. What a hollow victory he will celebrate then.
The crowd hushed. Everyone waited for me to react, to see what I was going to do next, if anything at all.
I was loud, making sure everyone could hear me. “Leftovers, huh? If that’s how you see me, then fine, but let me tell you something, Josh. I’m actually relieved that this has happened. Now I know who you really are, selfish, arrogant and immature. I thought you’d change, but that’s never going to happen. You’re so wrapped up in yourself, there’s no room for anyone else.”
Josh just stood there at a loss for words.
I kept going, “I can’t believe I settled with you for so long. Not anymore. And as far as what everyone thinks about me, I don’t care. I know the truth and that’s the only thing that matters. I’m finally free of you, Josh. I deserve better. I deserve someone who’s going to lift me up and not bring me down. Someone who will stand by me and trust me.”
I paused, looking straight at Megan, “And as for you, Megan, I feel sorry for you. You take things that aren’t yours and don’t care who you hurt in the process. One day you’ll realize you’re all alone in this world. Yes, you might have a guy by your side, but you won’t truly be happy. The fact is, Josh will do the same thing to you that he did to me. When that day comes, you’ll find that you don’t have anything real in life, and you’ll only have yourself to blame. You’ll just be a girl with an empty heart trying to fill it with meaningless relationships that never amount to anything.”
When I fell silent, it was eerily quiet. The wind echoed through the trees, birds chirped, no one spoke. Everyone was shocked I stood up to Josh.
Then, as the wind faded and the birds hushed, a small sound began to accumulate. It grew and grew until it became a thunderous roar from the crowd, they were cheering for me. A couple of people chanted my name and I heard somebody yell, “Way to go, Breanna!”
Only one person was still stone-faced. Eve. I hadn’t noticed her in the crowd before. Now I saw that she had pushed her way through the throngs and stood defiantly out from the crowd. She wasn’t looking at me, but at all the cheering people around her and she wasn’t happy about it. I couldn’t understand why. Her eyes were cold as she glared at each individual person. It seemed the more people she looked upon the more her fidgeting and agitation increased.
Then she shot her glaring eyes straight at me, her neck melting into her hunched shoulders, bringing her head down low and her eyes looking up at me through her lashes. She looked evil. But I wouldn’t let her do this to me again. I turned away to look at someone else in the crowd. Her stare was uncomfortable and made me very edgy. Why would Eve be upset about all of this? She doesn’t even know me or Josh for that matter.
When my gaze returned, she was gone. A short, skinny boy with bad acne stood in her spot. He gave me two thumbs up and smiled. I frowned, searching the crowd, but she was nowhere.
Josh cleared his throat in an attempt to get my attention. “I guess this is it then,” he said when I made eye contact.
“I guess so.”
With one last bridled glare at Austin, Josh grabbed his backpack off the ground and threw his arm around Megan’s shoulders as if he was still trying to make me jealous. They tried to make their way through the crowd but people on either side of them began knocking them back and forth. It made me smile a little.
When Josh was at a distance, I was suddenly flooded and overwhelmed with people coming up to me with praises. The unexpected increase in attention was a little too much for me. I wasn’t used to this.
“Breanna, I can’t believe you stood up to Josh like that!” Kim said. She was a tall girl who didn’t usually talk to me much.
“You were awesome the way you stood up to Megan like that. I don’t think I could have ever done what you just did,” Loren cut in.
But the flood of praises was abruptly interrupted when Trevor stood in front of me.
“Breanna, how could you turn this around on Josh the way you just did?”
“Turn this around on him? Trevor, I am the victim here. He cheated on me.”
“Well, from here on out, we’re no longer friends.”
Beck spoke up, “Trevor you can’t mean that. You’ve been friends with Breanna longer than Josh.”
But it didn’t matter. Trevor ignored Rebecca and stepped up to Austin. “As for you Austin, just remember you’re a big part of this. You better watch your back because this isn’t over.”
“You don’t scare me.” Austin pushed his shoulders back, clenching and unclenching his fists.
“It should.” the bell rang and Trevor glanced at the school then back at Austin. “You’re lucky the bell just rang. Just remember what I told you.”
As the crowd thinned out, I thought I would have felt more at ease, but I didn’t. I knew that this wasn’t over, not by a long shot. At least I had a chance to finally get out from underneath Josh and tell him what I’d been holding in for so long.
Austin was great. He walked me to my first class, worried I might have another encounter with Josh. He didn’t want me to be alone if that happened.
“See I told you. It all worked out!” Austin had an extra bounce in his step.
I wasn’t quite as convinced. “Yeah, I guess.”
“What’s wrong? I thought you’d be happy about this.” He gently took my hand and looked into my eyes.
“No, I am. I’m fine, really.” I lied, looking down at our hands together. I pulled awkwardly away from him. He put his hands in his pockets, and looked down the hall.
I pushed his discomfort away and thought about what just happened a moment ago. Breaking it off with Josh felt good, but what I didn’t see coming was Trevor’s declaration that we were no longer friends. How was this going to affect my relationship with Rebecca?
I set my worries aside for now. Everything was sinking in. I knew I didn’t want to be with Josh anymore, but the thought of someone else being with him – and that someone was Megan Turner – didn’t sit well with me. The jealousy was creeping up on me fast and I hated it!
Austin quickly said he’d see me at lunch before turning and walking away. At my Algebra class, a couple of students passed by me on their way into the room, staring at me, but I tried to ignore them. I was instantly hit with the reality that I have to be in the same room with a dozen classmates. It felt more like stepping into the boxing ring unwillingly. I knew that once I went inside I would have a full classroom of people bombarding me with questions, commenting on my personal life without my authorization.
I stepped close to the door, trying to hear the conversations going on inside the room. As I e
xpected, the chatter was all about me. Luckily, it sounded like the gossip was in my favor, but I still had that nauseous feeling stirring up in the pit of my stomach.
“Breanna,” a voice chimed to my right.
I turned and saw Eve approaching. Her mood had changed. She seemed pleasant and approachable, completely opposite from a few minutes ago. It made no sense.
I gulped, stammering, “H-hello Eve.”
“Quite an interesting show you put on there.”
“Yeah, well-”
A show? Great. Now my life was a soap opera.
“You’re a much stronger person than I’ve given you credit for.” Huh? That was weird. Why would she say something like that? Who was she to judge me, and why?
“Well, I didn’t know I had it in me either, but I guess it’d been building up for so long that it finally came out.”
“Hmm,” was all she said as she turned and walked into my Trig class.
I followed her in, confused. Was she in this class? She wasn’t here yesterday, so why would she have a reason to be in here today?
In the room, Becka immediately yelled out my name. I figured she’d be watching for me. All curious eyes were on me as I sat at an empty desk next to Becka.
She could hardly contain herself. “Bre, I am so proud of you! I can’t believe it! Well, I knew you had it in you. It was only a matter of time until you saw through Josh’s BS. Oh and Megan, girl, that kicked ass! Did you see the look on her face when you called her out on all her crap? I will cherish that look for days.” Her face fell when she saw I wasn’t participating. “Why aren’t you happy about this? Oh no, you’re not regretting anything are you?”
“No,” I mumbled, looking down at my desk.
“Then what’s wrong?”
I knew I’d have to broach the subject sooner or later and it was better that I got it out now before Trevor was around.
“Beck, what’s going to happen to us now?”
Awaken (Awaken Series Book 1) Page 13