by Robin M Helm
Xander heard the dismissal in her voice, and he turned and left the room, closing the door gently behind him. He leaned on the wall just outside the door, and then slid down to the floor, holding his face with his hands and praying as he listened to the water running for her shower. When he heard the water stop, he stood and listened to her thoughts. She was stuffing her bloody clothing into the trashcan, tying up the trash bag. I will never wear these clothes again, she thought. I can’t stand for them to touch me.
Michael said, You should go now, Xander. She needs to sleep.
I will stay with her, answered Gabriel. You go with Xander, Michael.
Why? Michael asked.
Because I am the answer to Xander’s prayer. Gabriel’s voice was firm.
So be it, thought Michael as he and Gabriel exchanged places.
Michael and Xander went down to his car, while Elizabeth went to her room to sleep. She heard Xander’s car engine start and looked out the window, watching him as he backed out of the driveway and out of her life. Her chest hurt, and the tears began to flow once more.
Miserable, she went to her bed, crawled under the covers, and sank into a dreamless sleep. After several hours, she opened her eyes to find that night had fallen, but her room was glowing strangely.
“Elizabeth.”
She turned her head toward the rich voice, and though she was dazzled by his appearance, she was at the same time afraid.
“Fear not.” Gabriel spoke softly, smiling at her.
“Gabriel? Is that you?” She sat up, astounded.
He was garbed as an archangel in his flowing white robes, and the glory of the Lord shone around him. His golden hair flowed to his shoulders; he was stunning in his beauty – pure and holy.
“Yes, Elizabeth. I am Xander’s brother, Gabriel.” He smiled at her kindly.
“Are you the Gabriel, the archangel? The same Gabriel who appeared to Mary and Joseph?” Such a thought had not occurred to her before, but now it seemed to make sense.
He laughed. “I am. I deliver messages and make announcements for Jehovah-Elyon, and He has sent me to you this night.”
“The Lord Most High sent you to talk to me?” she asked, amazed.
“Yes, Elizabeth. Your very name marks you for God. It can be translated ‘I am God’s daughter,’ ‘My God is an oath,’ or ‘God’s promise.’ You are very special, Elizabeth. Elohim has chosen you to do great works for Him. Are you willing to be His daughter in truth? The handmaiden and bondservant of the Lord?” Gabriel asked.
“I was angry at my Father today, and I am sorry for that. I am glad that He still wants me to be His daughter.” She inclined her head in submission.
“You need to know that Xander was obedient to God, Elizabeth. He did what his Father asked him to do, and he has wanted to reveal the total truth to you for many months. He could not because it might have impacted your ministry this summer. All those thousands of people might not have come to God had Xander done what he wanted to do and shown himself to you. What if you had reacted as you did today? He could not risk it. Can you honestly say that you would not have been angry had he told you earlier?” Gabriel’s voice was gentle, but it demanded truth.
She thought a moment. “No, I cannot say that. I don’t know how I would’ve reacted.”
“Can you imagine what a burden this secret has been for him? Xander loves you beyond all reason. He thinks of your welfare constantly. I should know. I have been his guardian since he took human form in obedience to Jehovah’s request.”
“What request?” Her curiosity was piqued.
“God Almighty asked Xander, the Chief of Guardians to guard you, Elizabeth. Jehovah told Xander, whom you know as Xander Darcy, that it would require a great sacrifice on his part, but Xander wanted to serve his Master, to please Him in all things, so he accepted the assignment. We are not creatures of great emotion, but, in accordance with the Almighty’s design, Xander fell in love with you. It changed him forever. He struggled with those feelings until Elohim assured him that it was His Will for him to love you, Elizabeth. In the last Enarth year, Xander was summoned before the throne. Jehovah asked Xander what he would desire above all things. Xander could have asked for wealth, power – anything. However, he asked to become human so that he could love you without sinning. He was willing to become mortal, to age and die, for you. Our Master was so pleased that He granted Xander a dual nature – fully human yet fully angel, the only one of his kind. God then told Xander that He wanted him to win your love and marry you so that you could serve Him together. Xander knew that God would not force you against your will; that he had to win your love as a human. He still willingly became human, not knowing whether or not you could ever love him. He became Xander Darcy when he accepted the Son as his savior. The only sins he had ever committed were connected to you, Elizabeth. He was angry and jealous on your behalf. Apart from the love that is God Almighty, I have never seen a love as great as the love Xander has for you. Will his sacrifice be for nothing, Elizabeth? Will you nurse your anger and ruin both your lives? It is possible that instead of Lucifer successfully thwarting God’s plans, you may be the instrument that does so.”
Her shock at his speech registered on her face. She had no words as she pondered all that Gabriel had said.
Gabriel listened to her mind and waited patiently as she processed the information.
Finally, he broke the silence. “Do you love him?”
“You have read my thoughts, I am sure. You know that I love him with my whole heart. But how can I trust him again?” she asked.
“You need have no fears about Xander’s trustworthiness. God has placed tremendous responsibilities on his shoulders. If God trusts him, why should you doubt him?” Gabriel asked.
“I have many questions. Will he be honest with me?”
“He greatly desires to be honest with you. He will answer all of your questions, if you will give him the chance to do so.” Gabriel smiled at her, and it was glorious.
“Will you be there?”
“Michael and I are always with you and Xander now. I guard Xander, and Michael guards you. We exchanged places for tonight. Michael can be a bit intimidating. Our Master chose me to talk to you.”
“Michael! He is the Michael, isn’t he? The Captain of the Host?” She was astonished. Elizabeth had studied the Bible all of her life, and she believed every word of it; however, meeting anyone mentioned within its pages was supposed to be an event confined to the afterlife. Her mind reeled.
“Yes, you are correct. I think any further questions you have should be directed to Xander. Will you agree to talk to him?” Gabriel’s face held the light of hope.
“Can I refuse?” she asked, raising an eyebrow. Just how do you tell Gabriel ‘no’?
“The same way you tell Xander ‘no.’ I am no better nor higher than he. You are certainly free to reject him. God never forces His will on anyone.” Gabriel’s tone was matter-of-fact, though he hoped that he had made Xander’s case well enough that she would agree to meet with him.
Elizabeth hesitated only a moment. “I will talk to him tomorrow. I want all of my questions answered, however. Will you tell him that?”
“Xander is too far away for the two of us to communicate telepathically, but Michael is able to hear us as well as communicate with us at any distance. He has been listening to our conversation through my mind, and Xander has been hearing his mind. Xander will call you tomorrow morning.”
“Tomorrow is Sunday. We won’t be able to talk until after church. Will he come with me as usual?” Elizabeth’s lively mind was fascinated by all she had learned.
“Do you wish for him to go to church with you?” asked Gabriel.
For the first time in more than twelve hours, Elizabeth smiled. “Yes. Tell him to come.”
Gabriel inclined his head and disappeared.
Elizabeth lay back down and tried to sleep, but her mind was spinning.
“Gabriel? Are you still there?” sh
e whispered.
A disembodied voice came from beside her bed. “Yes, Elizabeth. I am your guardian tonight. Now sleep.”
She closed her eyes. But I have so many questions.
Just as Elizabeth was drifting off to sleep, she was sure that she heard a deep, soft chuckle and a soothing voice say, “That is no surprise. You will have your answers tomorrow. Sleep now.”
The End of SoulFire: The Guardian Trilogy, Book 2.
Keep reading for the conclusion to The Guardian Trilogy
Legacy: The Guardian Trilogy, Book 3
Legacy
The Guardian Trilogy, Book 3
By Robin Helm
Scripture quotations taken from the New American Standard Bible®,
Copyright© 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995
by The Lockman Foundation
Used by permission. (www.Lockman.org)
Legacy was previously published on fan fiction websites. However, multiple changes have been made.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the author, Robin M. Helm.
The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious or are used fictitiously. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
Copyright © 2012 Robin Helm
Acknowledgments
Thank you to my betas: Gayle Mills, Stephanie Hamm, Julianne Martin, Tiffany Colonna, Wendi Sotis, Betty Campbell Madden, Mia Carr, and Melanie Helm. As always, my husband Larry deserves my heartfelt gratitude for his patience and assistance. I also to extend my thanks to my friend and writing colleague, Wendi Sotis, for her invaluable help with formatting.
“Whether, then, you eat or drink or whatever you do,
do all to the glory of God.”
I Corinthians 10:31
Chapter 1
“Arise, cry aloud in the night at the beginning of the night watches; pour out your heart like water before the presence of the Lord.”
Lamentations 2:19a
August 2008
Xander woke up Sunday morning, still kneeling on the floor by his bed. He had prayed for most of the night, thanking Jehovah-Jireh for another chance to talk with Elizabeth, and asking for wisdom in choosing the right words to say to her. Though God in His love and mercy had sent Gabriel to talk to Elizabeth during the night, and she had agreed to meet him at church this morning, he knew that she would have many questions concerning why he had never told her that he had been her guardian angel. When she had broken off their relationship, she had made it very clear to him that she felt he had betrayed her trust and deceived her in withholding the full truth.
He sighed heavily and rested his forehead against the side of his mattress as his mind ran through the terrible events of the previous day. Elizabeth had found out his secret in the worst possible way – from Gregory. Just as Xander had been about to reveal his dual nature to her, Gregory had dissolved the ropes holding the bridge on which they stood, and Elizabeth had fallen. Xander had been forced to reveal himself and save her or to watch her die on the rocks beneath them at the bottom of the gorge. After he had flown to rescue her in angelic form, in her anger she had left with Gregory, Lucifer’s son. Gregory had taken her to his home, drugging her with an intent to rape her, and though Xander had intervened in time to stop him, it had not erased his guilt from her mind.
Xander felt Michael’s arm around his shoulders and turned his head to see the massive warrior on his knees beside him. Michael? You spent the night kneeling on the floor with me? I remember that you comforted me while I prayed. I must have finally fallen asleep. Why did you not awaken me?
You needed to sleep. Michael’s voice was kind.
Xander suddenly understood, and his eyes widened. You held me up. I would have fallen over, but you spent the night supporting me. I am humbled. Thank you.
You are my brother. I was glad to be able to be of assistance in your time of need. You have done the same and more for so many others, Xander. Your entire existence has been spent in the service of the Master, protecting and comforting His children. I know that the Almighty will be with you today. He heard your prayers, and He will answer them. Michael’s thoughts were confident. He stood and extended his hand to Xander, helping him to stand.
Xander was stiff from having remained in one position without moving for such a long time, so he gratefully accepted Michael’s assistance as he forced his legs to move. After rising awkwardly to his feet, he then released Michael’s hand. Xander stretched, and then walked to his dresser, facing himself in the mirror, looking at the dark circles under his eyes from lack of sleep.
I think it is safe to say that if she takes me back today, it will not be because of my amazing good looks, he mused.
Michael stepped up behind him, smiling encouragement. A shower will soon put you to rights. Remember that she thinks you are handsomer than I am. There is no accounting for the taste of some people, but it may work to your favor.
Xander smiled crookedly and headed toward the bathroom. I will need every advantage I can muster. As he showered, his mind ran through all of Elizabeth’s preferences for him – her favorite clothes, colors, scent, hairstyle, music – everything he could think of. He briefly wondered if he had time to get a haircut. Xander dismissed the idea and began to pray again.
~~oo~~
As he had nearly every Sunday morning since he had met Elizabeth in his human form in January, Xander drove to Tabernacle Church with Michael flying overhead. He remained silent, musing on the oddity that his thousands of years of existence had not prepared him for the ordeal which lay ahead. Facing the questions of the eighteen-year-old girl whom he loved with an intensity beyond anything he could ever have imagined made him extremely anxious, and knowing that she held his very heart in her hands and had the ability to crush it with a word was daunting beyond anything he had ever experienced. He realized that he had existed on the periphery of life, observing humans with very little actual interaction. Fighting on the behalf of others was not half so difficult as laying himself open before Elizabeth, trusting her to understand and accept what he was.
As he drove, he meditated on Psalm 37:4-5, ‘Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust also in Him, and He will do it.’ Father, I know that You planted the desire for Elizabeth within my heart, and now I thank You for her, and I ask You to give her to me. Abba, please help her to understand, enable her to have confidence in me again, guide her questions, and help me to answer her in a way which pleases You. Calm my heart, Lord. Take my fear. I love you, Jehovah-Rophe.
Xander parked at the church, put his forearms on the steering wheel, and rested his head on them with his eyes closed. He looked up when he heard a tapping on the window; he had been so focused on praying that he had failed to hear any human thoughts.
Elizabeth was watching him intently, her brown eyes serious. He rolled down the window.
Gabriel stood behind her, his lips upturned in a small smile, while Michael landed beside him and tucked his wings.
“Hi,” she said. “Can we talk a minute?”
“Certainly. Where?”
Rather than answer, she walked around the car and got in. Her hands, holding her Bible, rested in her lap as she turned to him.
“Xander,” she began, and then stopped to take a deep breath. “I know we don’t have much time right now, but I want us to be comfortable with each other in church. Gabriel talked to me last night, and I have thought about everything he said. I am willing to listen to you, but I expect you to answer all my questions – fully and completely. Don’t leave anything out this time. Don’t edit or choose only what you think I need to hear. I want to know it all at once with no more surprises. If you can’t do that, ther
e is no more future for us. Will you do it?” She held his gaze with a raised eyebrow.
He was nearly giddy with relief, and it was only by great force of will that he did not envelop her in a hug to end all hugs. Thank you, Father, that she came to me of her own free will. It sounds as if she is ready to listen to me and give our relationship another chance. “I can answer your questions readily and without reservation, Elizabeth. Yes, I will. I absolutely promise to answer fully everything you ask me. I may actually add things you would not even think of asking because I want you to know everything about me. I have hated this secrecy, and I want everything to be out in the open finally. You may, in fact, have to ask me to be silent before I overwhelm you with information.”
He wanted to take her hand, but he was afraid that she would think he was assuming too much; he would wait for her to make the first move.
“You look tired,” Elizabeth said, her eyes showing her sympathy.
“I did not sleep well. May I make a request?” he asked hopefully.
Elizabeth’s curiosity took the lead. “Of course, though it doesn’t necessarily follow that I will agree, you know.”
“I know, I know.” He breathed deeply. “I love your family dearly, and I know that we always eat Sunday dinner with them, but would you mind if we went out for lunch today – just the two of us? I find that I am eager to talk to you, and I want to do it as soon as possible. My tenuous hold on my sanity may not last though Life Group, worship service, and dinner. I am actually anticipating being questioned for once. Can we make it sooner rather than later? Please?” Xander struggled to smile though his hands remained clenched into fists in his lap.