“Okay, Grandma,” Mel said from her perch on Willa’s back.
“I’ve got Harry,” Ruby told me. “I’ll call Pop as soon as we get there. I promise.”
“Thank you,” I said. My fingers dug into my palms as I watched everything unfold as if I were hovering above it all. I felt myself start to disconnect like I used to do as panic filled my mind.
“It’s no problem, Sabrina,” Everett said. “Go with my mom. It’ll be okay.” His voice came at me as if from underwater.
I hugged Harry. “Pop will pick you and Ruby up soon.”
“Okay, Riri,” he answered and hugged me back.
“Come on, kids,” Willa said. “Since I’m just the babysitter I have no idea about how many candy bars you are allowed to eat on Halloween or how late y’all are allowed to stay up watching movies.”
“Oh, yeah! We’re going to get so sick!” Mel yelled as Everett led them up the street to the Monroe house.
“Come on, honey. Sabrina, come with me.” Becky Lee had taken charge.
“Wyatt. Is he—how bad?” Why hadn’t I told him I loved him when I had the chance? What if it was too late? Tears burned behind my eyes but I blinked to keep them at bay.
“I don’t know how bad it is. They won’t tell me over the phone,” Becky Lee said.
We rode to the hospital in Maryville in silence.
Becky Lee pulled into a spot. “Come on.”
I wished I could be like her. Something or someone had hurt her son. Who knew how bad—and she was still in control.
I was not in control. I was hanging by a thread.
I followed blindly as Becky Lee led us to Wyatt. At some point she took my hand. I grabbed on to it, needing something to hold on to because it felt like I would float away. The white halls and the white lights, the beeping and the smells—it took me back to the last time I was here, with my sister.
We walked down hall after hall. Our footsteps echoed on the linoleum floors and empty sterile hallways, it filled my ears and rattled my thoughts.
We finally reached a nurses’ station and Becky Lee asked about Wyatt. My vision blurred and I blinked, thinking my contacts were dry. I watched as she pointed to a room down a short hallway.
Becky Lee squeezed my hand. “Come on, Sabrina.”
Nodding dumbly, I followed her into Wyatt’s room.
An orderly was stripping the bed. He looked over at us when we walked through the doorway.
“We’re looking for Wyatt Monroe,” Becky Lee told him. I didn’t know how she could remain so calm. My insides were trying to tear themselves apart.
“I don’t even know why they brought him into this room. There was nothing to do for him,” he grumbled and continued working on the bed.
I stood frozen on my little square of linoleum. Time stopped. Or if it was, it was spinning backward because the past had swallowed me up and spit me right back up into the terrible present. Tears filled my eyes, but I blinked them back. I bit my lip and clenched my fists until my fingernails dug painfully into my palms. But the steady tide of panic and grief rising inside of me would not recede no matter how hard I tried to force it away.
I spun around and tried to walk, but ended up running out of Wyatt’s room instead. I passed Wyatt’s father, his face full of concern, in the hall. I did not stop running until I was outside, my racing heart threatening to pound out of my chest.
I saw a taxi idling on the curb. Someone got out and I ran to the car before it could leave.
“Can you take me home?” I must have looked as desperate as I felt because he immediately nodded.
“Sure thing. Hop inside, miss.”
“Thank you.” I got in and slammed the door, glancing out the window in time to see Becky Lee hurrying out the door with Wyatt’s father close behind.
“Go. Please go now,” I said frantically.
He pulled away from the curb. “Where to?”
“Green Valley. The Logan Horse Ranch.” I sank back in the seat.
I choked back a sob. My chest hurt.
“Are you okay?”
I could barely form words around the lump in my throat. “I’m fine,” I squeaked out.
“You sure?”
I nodded, but he couldn’t see that, he was driving. “Yes,” I managed to say.
My throat hurt. I wanted to scream. I wanted to run home, not sit here. Sitting in this taxi was like sitting in a tiny box I couldn’t get out of. Or maybe these thoughts swirling around my head were the box.
I let my head fall to the side against the cool window. I looked up at the moon, shining white, high up in the sky. Nothing like the brilliance of the Harvest Moon that night in the pasture with Wyatt.
He was gone, and I never told him how much I loved him because I was too afraid.
Soon, the moon was not the only white spot in my vision. I couldn’t catch my breath.
Breathe.
I managed a shallow breath. I turned my head and looked at my knees.
Put your head down.
I leaned forward as much as the seat belt would allow. It helped. A bit. I should be home soon. Maryville was only thirty minutes away.
“We’re here. Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Fine. I—” I reached into my pocket and pulled out two twenties. “Here.” I tossed the bills to the front seat, got out, and ran to the gate. I hurriedly punched in the code. As soon as the black iron parted, I ran up the gravel path toward the house not even waiting for the driver to pull away. I didn’t know why I was in such a rush. I had nothing to run toward anymore. I stopped and stood there as I choked on a sob.
I stumbled to the porch swing and tried to catch my breath as I stared out at the darkness. Tears filled my eyes but I couldn’t let them fall because they’d never stop.
I rocked in the porch swing and tried to get a breath. I waited for my chest to rise while I searched for air that wouldn’t come.
“No, no, no,” I whispered, as if the repeated denials could chase this pain away. But nothing could get rid of it. It lived inside of me now, and always would.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Wyatt
Halloween was the worst night of the year, without fail. Even worse than New Year’s Eve. Goddamn Halloween with its bunch of dumbass drunks and idiots who only cared about hitting the next party. I thought Green Valley would be better than Nashville. Nope, everybody in town was riled up like it was their last chance to have a drink or get a piece of ass. Half-naked girls dressed as sexy-something-or-others ran around every which way and anonymous dirty-minded revelry spread into the bars, the streets, parks, even the damn Piggly Wiggly. I was one of the unlucky bastards who got to clean up the messes. Fuck this. Next year I was going to be sick for Halloween.
I stalked down the hall of the hospital in Maryville with murder on my mind. Who was I going to kill? Anyone that got in my goddamn way, that’s who. But I’d start with Devron Stokes and his drunk ass. I’d pulled him over for weaving all over the highway right outside of town, near The Wooden Plank. He’d obviously just tied one on. While I was in the process of arresting him a car full of asshole teenagers opened their door as they drove by. The door hit me on the side, and I went flying into the street. I was lucky they didn’t run me over as they drove by. But I got their plate number and Jackson had probably already arrested their punk asses by now. I was also lucky Stokes pulled my ass out of the road and called 911. Maybe I’d take him off my murder list.
I was not hurt. I walked away from the scene and refused to let them cart my ass off on a stretcher to the ambulance like an invalid. All I needed was a few ibuprofen and I’d be just fine. But procedure dictated that I be checked out thoroughly at the hospital. Sheriff James was a stickler for procedures. I admired him, I respected him, and I even agreed with him. But I had no patience for this kind of thing. I hated hospitals. I spent a lot of time in the hospital in college after my knee blew out and I had no desire to repeat that experience. Plus, this hospital was an
overcrowded clusterfuck tonight. No one could tell their asses from their elbows. I’d waited in the ambulance bay for almost an hour before a doctor saw me. Only to receive a prescription for industrial strength ibuprofen and told me to take it easy. No fucking shit.
“Wyatt! Oh my God. Wyatt—” My sobbing mother hurled herself into my arms when she caught sight of me turning the corner.
“Mom, what’s going on? Are you okay?” I looked over her shoulder to my father.
Tears filled his eyes as he wrapped his arms around the both of us. “You’re alive. You’re okay.”
“What the fuck is going on? And I love y’all too.”
“We didn’t know what happened to you,” my mother cried. “I just got a call to come down here. Sabrina came with me, but she ran off when your room was empty. The orderly—he made it sound like you’d died. I just knew that couldn’t be. I’d know it, I’d feel it. We’ve been looking around for someone who knows what the heck is going on. This place is a madhouse tonight—”
I cut her off. “Sabrina? Where is she?” I pulled my mother to the side as people rushed by us down the hall.
My father answered, “She took off runnin’. I tried to catch her, but she was too fast. She hopped into a cab outside the hospital. We’ve been trying to find out what happened to you, and then we were going to go and find her—”
“Shit. Fuck. Damn it,” I growled. “This whole entire night has been a disaster. I’ve gotta go find her. She probably went home. She’s probably frantic.”
My mother handed me her car key. “Take my car. I met your father here, so I’ll ride home with him. You find her. The poor thing was shook up something fierce.”
“Wait a second, Wyatt. Please.” My father stopped me with a hand on my arm.
“What is it?”
“I owe you an apology. If tonight has taught me one thing, it’s that life is just too short to hold stupid grudges. I’m proud of you, and I’m sorry. Now go and get your girl.”
I pulled my father into a hug. “Thanks, Dad.”
I turned to dart down the hall, then whirled back to my parents. “The girls?” I asked.
“They’re with Everett and Willa at the house. Ruby and Harry were with them. They were going to call Roy to pick them up. They are all fine, watching movies on the TV. I called to check not too long ago. We’ll drive straight home. I’ll take care of them, honey.”
“Thanks, Mom.”
Now, I had to find Sabrina. I tried to call her cell as I walked out to my mother’s car, but it went straight to voice mail. Damn it. I had to get to her. I couldn’t stand the thought of her frantic and upset. And I knew her—she was thinking the worst. My heart seized at the thought of her somewhere crying and alone.
I pulled onto the road and headed for Green Valley. Maryville was about a half-hour drive. I tapped my hand against the steering wheel when I got caught up in the Halloween traffic. Come on, dammit.
I entered the gate code to the Logan Ranch and drove through, pulling to a stop in front of the house. The lights were on outside, but the house was dark. I stepped onto the porch and looked around. There was Sabrina’s leather jacket draped over the back of the chair next to her cell phone. I recognized the Smash-Girl case.
Just in case she was inside, I banged on the door then tried to open it; it was locked. Where would she go? I ran out to the front lawn. I stood there and spun in a circle trying to scan the dark for a sign of her.
The pasture! That was her spot. I didn’t bother with my truck. I pulled my flashlight from my belt and ran, skidding down the slight slope to the pasture calling her name.
I spotted her. Lying in that same spot in the grass we’d shared during the Harvest Moon. The night when I knew for certain exactly what she would mean to me.
“Wyatt?” She sat up. Then she stood up. Then she started running toward me.
I dropped the flashlight and caught her as she flew into my arms.
“I love you. I love you. I love you,” she repeated, over and over through her sobs.
“I love you, Sabrina. I’m so sorry I scared you. So, so sorry. I love you too.”
She pulled back and cupped my face in her hands. The look in her eyes pierced right through my heart. Straight into my soul.
She loved me.
This was what love should look like.
A wide-open soul—bared so it could shine in the dark.
Sabrina shone brighter than the moon and I loved her more than my own life.
“I’m sorry, darlin’. Everything was a mess tonight—”
“It’s okay. Everything is okay now. You’re here, that’s the only thing that matters.” Her voice cracked as another sob escaped. She pressed her lips together to hold the rest back.
I pulled her into my chest and held her as she cried. “Shh, I’m here. I’m here and I will never leave you, I swear it. Just let it out, baby. Let it go.” She trembled in my arms as her tears flowed until she was still and quiet in my arms.
I tipped her face back so I could kiss her. Once, twice, then again as we sunk into each other and the whole world disappeared around us.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Wyatt
The early evening sun shone low in the sky over the pasture at the Logan Ranch. We rolled to a stop and got out of my truck. But this time I was prepared—with more than just blankets. I also had plans. Big ones.
Sabrina pulled the picnic basket from the cab and I grabbed the blanket. It was almost Thanksgiving, but I was grateful for the warm November night. We’d stopped at the Front Porch for a takeout picnic in her favorite spot.
“I miss you when you work nights,” she whispered in my ear after we spread the thick, waterproof blanket on the grass and sat down. I had just come off two weeks of night shifts. It made it more complicated to spend time with her, and I hated it.
I reached for her hand and used it to pull her into my arms. “I missed you too. We’re going to have to do something about that. I don’t like being away from you so much. We’re in the same town but I hardly ever get to see you when I’m on nights.”
Her eyes got big but before she could say anything, I took her sweet mouth with mine and got lost in her. I needed her, every day, every minute. Every second I was apart from her built a thirst in my soul that only she could quench. As I drank from her lips, she replenished me.
I tasted her skin with open-mouthed kisses and listened to her moan and sigh when I added soft bites to the mix. I shouldn’t have started this yet. Every time I got near her—got my hands and mouth on her gorgeous body—I wanted more. I wanted us naked and moving together until I made her come. I loved watching her fall apart in my arms.
I wrenched my mouth away from her warm skin. “Dinner will get cold. We should eat,” I said, but the words came out in a groan.
“I don’t care,” she said and reached out for me.
“Do you want to have kids?” We’d tiptoed around the subject before and I was pretty certain she did. But I asked her directly to distract her from jumping back into my lap. I also wanted to know. It fit in with my big plans.
She froze, then sat back down across from me on the blanket. Her eyes darted to mine, she smiled. “Yes. I would love to have a baby someday. Do you want more kids?”
“Yes. I already know you’re a great mother.”
Her eyes dropped to the blanket as a blush rose over her cheeks. “Thank you,” she breathed. “Does this mean…?”
“I’ve thought about it. With you it will be perfect; it will be what it should be.”
We ate our dinner and talked as the sun descended behind the mountains in the distance.
“It’s getting dark. Should we get back?” she asked.
“No, I have pillows, sleeping bags, and a tent that fits over the truck bed in case it starts raining. We’re camping out here tonight. That’s the plan,” I informed her with a wink. I tried to wink at her often; it always made her blush. I stood up and moved to the back of the truck. I
pulled battery powered lanterns out of the back and turned them on.
She grabbed one and helped me distribute them around our area. “I like this plan.” She grinned.
“Good. Because there’s more to the plan.” I grabbed her waist and pushed her gently to sit on the lowered tailgate.
“There is?”
“Yep. I love you. You’ve made my life better. You are sweetness and light. Softness and strength. You have filled every inch of my heart with your love and I want to spend the rest of my life filling yours too. Sabrina, we should get married. I’ll move into the ranch with the girls if you want me to. They want this too. I’ve already talked to them and they love you, Sabrina. I have their blessing to ask you to be my wife, to be their mother.”
She sat there and blinked at me.
I sank to a knee in front of her and reached into my pocket.
She nodded before I could even get the words out to ask her.
I grinned as tears filled her eyes and spilled down her cheeks.
I pulled out the small red velvet box. “Sabrina Louise Logan, will you marry me?” I asked.
She smiled. “Yes,” she gasped. “Yes, I will marry you, Wyatt William Monroe.”
I slipped the shiny round solitaire on her finger. It fit perfectly. Just like she fit into my life—perfectly, seamlessly, like she was always meant to be a part of it. “You’re mine,” I marveled. I kissed her hand where my ring sat in its gold band on her finger.
She held her hand out in front of her and gazed at it. The diamond sparkled in the glow of the fiery Tennessee sunset.
“I’m yours,” she agreed. Her eyes shifted to mine and burned into them. “And you’re mine. Forever, Wyatt. Me, you, the girls, and Harry. We’re going to be a family.”
“I’ll never let you go, darlin’,” I promised.
“Good, see that you don’t.” A giddy laugh escaped her, and I smiled.
I stood and lifted her from the tailgate into my arms. I stepped back and twirled with her into the pasture. “Dance with me,” I said and put her down. I held out my hand, she took it.
Crime and Periodicals: Green Valley Library Book #2 Page 24