“Sir Frederick, would you allow me to escort Miss Valerie to her room?”
“Well, if it wouldn’t be any trouble?”
“No. None at all.” Thomas turned to Smythe senior, who gave him a curt nod. “No need to worry, Father. I’ll be back in a few moments.” Thomas tucked Valerie’s hand into the crook of his arm and led her from the dining room.
The cool night air blew in through the open windows of the grand salon as they made their way to the corridor. Valerie shivered, and Thomas drew her even closer. His body felt firm and warm through the silk of her dress.
“You didn’t really need to leave the table, Mr. Smythe. Although I do appreciate your help, Reggie could have seen me to my room.” Valerie glanced at him out of the corner of her eye.
Oh, but he is quite smashing indeed, my knight in shining armor.
“Nonsense. I would have insisted, in any case.” He held her hand as she stepped over the threshold and continued to hold it as he walked in front of her along the narrow passage.
“Here’s my room.” Valerie reluctantly let go of Thomas’ hand and pulled the key out of her reticule. She handed it to him and, as he took it, his fingers caressed hers and she shivered again. He pushed the door open, then bowed low.
Valerie inclined her head as a blush warmed her cheeks. “Thank you, Mr. Smythe. I do so appreciate your kindness.”
“I have to admit it was entirely selfish on my part.” He lightly caressed her cheek with the back of his hand. “I wanted to spend a few moments alone with you.”
“Mr. Smythe. I—I don’t know what to say,” Valerie murmured.
“You needn’t say a word, for if you did, you may choose to deny me the sweet pleasure of your lips.” Before Valerie could speak, he pulled her to him and lowered his mouth to hers.
His lips were hot and moist. Valerie knew she should push him away, but the delicious tingle stirring in her belly was too wonderful to let go.
Slowly, he raised his head. “Forgive me. I’m a cad.”
“Yes, you are,” she replied, her voice low. With a smile, she stepped into her cabin and gently closed the door behind her. She leaned back against it and hugged her arms around her waist.
My first kiss!
And it was everything she had ever imagined it to be, and more.
“Heaven help me,” she whispered to the darkness. “I think I may be falling in love.”
Chapter 8
Valerie sat with her family in the grand salon of the Fast Alice and watched as the passengers began to gather for their last meal together before reaching shore. The past three weeks had flown by so quickly, she hadn’t had a chance to catch her breath, let alone tell Thomas the truth about her foot.
Her days had been filled with Thomas’ company. Attentive and kind, he’d stolen a few more kisses when no one was looking. Valerie touched a finger to her lips and smiled.
Well, maybe stolen isn’t exactly the right word.
“I see that young man of yours coming this way,” Jacqueline whispered. She was still pale and gaunt from the sea sickness but had insisted on joining everyone for their final night aboard ship.
Thomas approached and bowed low to the ladies. “Good evening, everyone.” He straightened and adjusted his jacket. “May I say both mother and daughter are looking quite ravishing this evening?”
Valerie giggled at his lavish compliment.
Is this what it’s like to be in love?
Valerie rose from the chair with Thomas’ gallant support. “Mama? Papa? Do you mind if we get some punch before supper?”
Frederick glanced up from his book. “Jacqueline, my dear, would you like some punch?”
“Oh, yes Freddie. Thank would be wonderful.”
“Very well, then. Valerie, I’ll join you.” He removed his spectacles and tucked them inside his jacket pocket.
At the refreshment table, Thomas poured each of them a glass of the fruity concoction and a fourth for Jacqueline. Valerie took a sip, enjoying the sweet beverage.
“Good evening everyone,” Sir David said as he joined them. He shook Frederick’s hand and sketched a shallow bow toward Valerie. After their first meeting, Valerie decided she would forego curtsying and offered a polite nod instead.
“Good evening, Sir David,” she bade.
Smythe picked up a glass of punch and took a long drink. “So, tell me Frederick, have you managed to find the girl a husband on board?”
Valerie all but sputtered her punch. “I—I beg your pardon?” she choked out.
Frederick chuckled. “Well, it would seem this son of yours has monopolized all of her time.” He nodded toward Thomas. “I don’t believe there’s been a chance of anyone else getting to know her.” He smiled at Valerie. “I must say, though, it’s been wonderful for her confidence to have young Thomas pay such close attention to her.”
“Really, Papa. We don’t need to discuss this, do we?” she pleaded.
“She has trouble finding suitors, does she?” Smythe’s eyes swept over her. “As comely as she is, I would think you’d have to keep the doors barred against the men.”
“Well, no one else has seemed able to look past her injury like Thomas here has,” Frederick explained.
Valerie’s gaze bounced from her father to Smythe to Thomas. This wasn’t going well at all. If she didn’t do something fast, Papa was going to explain about her foot right here in front of everyone—in front of Thomas. She had intended to tell him the truth, but it just never seemed to be the right time. And she certainly didn’t want it blurted out by her father.
“Thomas, I’m not feeling very well,” she whispered, placing her hand on his arm. “Would you mind escorting me above deck for a breath of fresh air?”
“Of course.” He turned to their fathers. “Miss Brooks has asked me to take her above deck. She’s not feeling well,” he explained for her. “Would you mind, Sir Frederick?”
Valerie’s father waved his hand. “No, go right ahead. But dinner will be served soon. Don’t be late.”
Valerie allowed herself a small sigh of relief as they made their way up through the hatch and out into the cool night air. With her hand on Thomas’ arm, they strolled to the front of the ship and watched the glistening spray as it shot up near the bow of the clipper.
The half-moon cast its glow on the water—it rippled with the movement of the dark, shadowy waves. Valerie leaned on the railing, her curls blowing off her face. “It’s so beautiful out here, isn’t it?”
“Mmmm. It certainly is.”
A kaleidoscope of butterflies began to gather in her stomach. Thomas was so close, his breath tickled the back of her neck, and sent a shiver down her spine. She turned to face him.
Thomas lifted a hand and caressed Valerie’s cheek. He let it drop to the back of her head and gently pulled her to him.
“Mr. Smythe, are you attempting to take advantage of me while we’re alone?” she asked, breathless.
“Absolutely.” He grinned, moving ever closer. Gently, he tipped her chin until her eyes met his. “I fear I’ll never grow tired of your sweet, sweet kisses.”
Thomas’ lips touched hers and she melted against him. The butterflies in her stomach fluttered in unison. Certain she would faint at any moment, Valerie leaned into Thomas for support. His kiss grew more insistent as his hands slid over her shoulders and down her arms.
Her skin tingled everywhere he touched her. His hands caressed, moving upward over the thick whalebone that shaped her waist, and stopped at the edge of the square cut neckline. Thomas let his fingers tease the lace edge and dip beneath the fabric.
Valerie stiffened. “Thomas. Please. You mustn’t.”
“Don’t tell me this isn’t what you’ve been wanting because I won’t believe a word of it,” he whispered into her ear. “This is why you really asked me up here, isn’t
it?”
Valerie’s mind whirled at the accusation. What in heaven’s name was he implying? That she somehow was to blame for his behavior?
Thomas’ voice turned raspy. “Your lips were made for mine, Valerie. Let them do what they will.” He kissed her ear, then her chin, then his mouth followed the path his fingers had just taken and moved along the sensitive skin of her décolletage.
This wasn’t right. Everything was happening much too fast. Valerie struggled to catch her breath.
“Valerie!” Reggie scurried across the deck, screeching her name, and ran right into the pair. The momentum knocked Thomas and Valerie apart, and her to the floor. Thanks to the crinoline, her skirt went up over her head. Mortified, she struggled to her feet as Thomas helped her up.
“Sorry, Val, but Papa said I should come and get you. It’s time to go in for dinner and he thought maybe I could help you down the stairs.”
“I don’t need any help, thank you.” Valerie ground out the words. “Haven’t you helped enough already?”
“But your foot—”
“Shouldn’t your foot be almost healed by now?” Thomas asked as he dusted off his trousers. “After all, it has been nearly three weeks.”
Breathe. I can’t breathe.
“Y–yes, er…about that,” she squeaked. She turned to her little brother. “P-please go on ahead Reggie. I’ll catch up with you shortly.”
“But Val, why would he say that? Your foot isn’t going to get better,” Reggie said. “The doctor said it wouldn’t ever get better.”
Valerie closed her eyes and prayed to Heaven. Please Lord, make it so Thomas didn’t hear those words.
But when she opened her eyes, she knew he had heard all too clearly.
“What is the child talking about, Miss Brooks?” he asked, the warmth in his voice cooling as he spoke. “I thought you said it was only a sprain.”
She took a deep breath. “I-I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I should have.” She swallowed. “You see, I-I was hit by a carriage when I was very young and my foot was—it was,” she cleared her throat. “Damaged.”
“Do you mean to say you’re a cripple?” His voice had turned frigid.
“Does it m-matter to you?” she whispered.
“Matter? Why should it matter to me?”
She looked at him and read the truth in his eyes. The butterflies had all flown away, leaving nothing but a hollow ache in the pit of her stomach.
“I’ve asked myself that same question, Mr. Smythe.” She turned to her brother and put her hand on his shoulder. She blinked hard as tears stung her eyes. “Reggie, I believe I’d like you to help me down the stairs after all. Would you mind?”
Reggie straightened, as he offered Valerie his arm. “I wouldn’t mind at all.” Scrunching his face, he stuck his tongue out at Thomas.
Valerie held her head high as she walked alongside her brother. This time, she didn’t turn back for one final glance. It didn’t matter anymore…Thomas was no longer her knight in shining armor.
Chapter 9
Valerie entered her cabin and closed the door—thankful she had a room separate from her parents. Leaning against the door, she struggled to catch her breath as she fought to keep the sobs from breaking through. It had taken all her willpower to sit through dinner with Thomas ignoring her. What had he been thinking the few times his eyes met hers? Probably how he’d wasted the entire voyage on a cripple.
Her gaze skipped haphazardly around the room as she tried to steady her emotions. Valerie straightened and tugged at the back of her dress, all but ripping the buttons from the facing, until the bodice hung down around her waist.
“Damn,” she cursed. “Forgot the bloody crinoline.” Valerie undid the laces and let the steel cage drop, the dress following closely thereafter. She grabbed her cane and stepped out of the pile of clothing, but her foot caught in the folds of the fabric and she tripped. She stumbled to the floor and didn’t even bother to try and get up. Laying down, she gave in to her sorrow.
A few moments later, Lucy appeared at the doorway between their rooms, carrying an oil lamp. “I thought I heard ye come in,” she began, her voice trailing off at the sight of Valerie in a heap on the floor, crying, her clothes twisted around her. Lucy put the lamp down, bent over and helped Valerie to her feet.
“What’s troublin’ ye, child? I’ve never seen ye carryin’ on so.” Lucy used the corner of her robe to wipe away Valerie’s tears.
“It’s n-nothing, Lucy. P-please. Leave me be.” Valerie sat on the edge of the bed, tears still streaming down her cheeks.
“I’ll not leave while ye’re in such a sorry state.” Lucy put her hand on the young woman’s shoulder, stooping to look her in the eye. “It was that young Mr. Smythe, wasn’t it? He’s the reason ye’re so distressed.” Lucy studied her charge. “What’d he do to ye?”
Valerie’s eyes flew to Lucy’s. “Nothing.”
“Ye answered much too fast fer me to believe ye.”
“Please, Lucy, just go to bed. I really don’t want to talk about it right now.”
“Can I get ye a nice cup of tea then? It’ll be good for what ails ye.”
“No, thank you,” Valerie whispered, her throat tight. “I’d just like to get some rest. We can talk in the morning, all right?”
Lucy straightened. “I understand, girl. I’ll leave ye be if ye promise ye’ll call me if ye need help.”
Valerie nodded, wiping her eyes. “Thank you.” As Lucy turned to leave, she called after her, “Lucy, please don’t say anything to Mama. I don’t want to bother her with this.” She forced a smile. “Besides, I’m certain I’ll be fine in the morning.”
“Well, if that’s what ye want. But I’m certain, whatever ‘tis yer mother’d want to comfort ye.”
“Perhaps when her health is better,” Valerie offered.
As soon as Lucy was gone, Valerie lay down on the narrow bed. She took a deep breath to steady her nerves and was stuck in the side by a corset stay. Turning this way and that, Valerie wrestled the ties until the offending undergarment finally loosened. Yanking it off, she threw it onto the pile on the floor. “Well, that’s the last time I wear a bloody corset for any man,” she vowed.
How could I have been such an idiot?
Why had she been foolish enough to believe Thomas would be different from any of the other men she had ever met? For heaven’s sake, in her vivid imagination, they were already wed and had a full brood of offspring.
Shame and anger swirled inside her. The gypsy’s words echoed in her mind—a love that’ll break your heart…
How did she know?
Her heart clenched as fresh sobs escaped her. Valerie rolled over and pulled the pillow close to her chest when her arm brushed against a square object tucked beneath the sheets. She pulled it out and stared at it. The book. The love story of Caroline and Damon. The reason for her false hope about a love of her very own.
Well, there’ll be no more of that!
She flung the book across the room where it thumped against the door and landed with a dull thud on the floor.
No longer would she pin her heart on a dream of marriage and children of her very own. Instead, she would focus on her studies. She would use this trip to further her knowledge.
But what about love?
Her heart clenched once more as she pushed the thought away. Love was not for her. She would never put herself in such a vulnerable position again.
Chapter 10
“Let me help you, Miss Brooks,” Johnny offered. He held his arm out and Valerie took hold of it. Gently, he assisted her in climbing over the lowered railing and onto the wooden ramp leading from the ship to the shore. Reggie ran up behind them.
“Wait for me, Val!” He tossed a small canvas bag over her head. The bag landed with a loud thud on the walk.
“Careful!” she scolded, ducking just in time. “What have you got in there? Cannonballs?”
“Of course not,” he huffed. “Everyone knows cannonballs are much too heavy to be carried around for everyday use.” He placed one hand on the rail and, before Valerie could stop him, vaulted over the side and landed next to his belongings.
“What’s in it then?” Valerie asked, straightening her skirt.
“Rope and knots and wax and some pitch and—”
Valerie raised a hand and laughed. “Never mind. I get the picture.” She stepped off the plank and caught sight of Thomas heading down the walkway. Well, he was the last person she wanted to see! Valerie grabbed Reggie’s arm and yanked him along as she picked up her pace.
“Where’s Mama and Papa?” she asked, scanning the crowd. She spied Lucy saying goodbye to Johnny. A smile touched Valerie’s lips.
At least one of us has found love on this voyage.
“Miss Brooks. How nice to see you.”
She winced and turned toward him. She could hardly avoid a direct greeting in public. She smiled, a hard glint in her eye. “Pity I can’t say the same about you.”
“I beg your pardon?” Thomas asked.
Good. She’d caught him off guard. “I believe you heard me quite plainly.” She thumped her cane hard on the wood walk beneath their feet, then raised it up between them. The carved Jack-in-the-Woods head stared threateningly down at Thomas, its eyes slanted in an evil grin. “We may have to travel together, but if you don’t keep your distance, you’ll get to know Jack here intimately.” Valerie looked him in the eye. “Do we understand each other?”
Thomas straightened, an angry flush covering his cheeks. “I don’t see what you’re so upset about. After all, you were the one who lied to me.”
“Be honest just for a moment, Mr. Smythe,” her voice gaining strength as she spoke. “When I revealed the truth about my foot, you called me a cripple. Would you have been interested in me if you’d known otherwise?
He shifted his weight from foot to foot, avoiding her gaze. “I see Father up ahead. I have to go now.”
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