“Good!” I patted his shoulder harshly and stepped back. “There we go. That wasn’t so hard.”
His hand went to his shoulder and he scowled at me. “I didn’t mean anything by it.”
I pulled out my wallet and threw several bills on the counter. “Of course you didn’t. Have another beer on me.”
I walked back to the end of the bar, grinned and nodded a goodbye to Heidi before heading out. I really didn’t want to leave, but I had to get back to work.
“Alexei.”
I stopped and turned.
Heidi made a face at me. “It doesn’t mean I’m going out with you, but thanks.”
I laughed. “You’re welcome.”
Her mouth worked like she was fighting back a grin and then she lost. Her lips stretched wide and she rolled her eyes before turning away. “My answer’s still no.”
“Uh huh.”
11
Heidi
“He’s beautiful.” I ran my hand over my bear’s head and sighed. “He’s this perfect specimen of maleness and he’s hitting on me. And he gives me this feeling… I can’t even describe it. It’s like I want to throw caution to the wind and just go crazy all over him.”
Bear rested his head on my knee and grunted.
“I can’t, though. That’s just not my life. And he doesn’t know the truth about me.” I looked out at the ocean and watched as the waves rolled onto the shore. It was a red flag sort of day, dangerous water to swim in but still beautiful to look at. Clouds hung heavily in the sky, but it wasn’t supposed to rain until later in the day.
The gloomy, overcast skies should’ve had me feeling moody, but I was on a high from being pursued by Alexei. He made me laugh and something about him was intoxicating.
“I’m lonely. I hate to admit it, and I really didn’t realize it until just a day or two ago, but I am.” Maybe I was moodier than I realized. “My life is so full. I have the boys and Maria. I have other friends… I have…”
He adjusted his head and growled.
“Yes, I have you. Kind of. As much as one can have a polar bear with escape artist tendencies.” I scratched behind his ears and kissed the top of his head. “I don’t want to feel lonely. I was fine before he came along.”
I had been fine. It had been easy to accept the life I’d chosen for myself when there hadn’t been anything working against it. Alexei was working against that life. It was hard to be okay with being alone when there was someone as magnetic as Alexei showering me with attention.
“I came here to be alone. Almost a decade ago. I came with the expectation that I’d find solitude. Not counting Maria and the boys. I was okay with it. More than okay, I was happy with it. It was better than the other options, honestly.”
The sound of a car door shutting somewhere in the distance pulled me from my reverie. I shook my head and patted my bear on the head. Houdini, as I was calling him, understood. He stood up with a growl and butted into me with his nose before backing up and letting me stand.
“I hate having to take you back to that jerk. I hope he’s nicer to you than he is to me.” We walked down the beach and took the path we always did to get to the sanctuary. “Maybe I’ll bring the kids to the wildlife sanctuary today. No, not today. I promised them I’d take them to Clotilde’s for ice cream today, and it’s supposed to rain. But soon. I’ll bring them soon.”
I knocked on the gate and as we waited, Houdini rubbed against me and snorted, his big dark eyes seeming to smile at me.
“I bet you’d like ice cream. You probably like anything having to do with ice. I’m not sure anyone could afford to keep you fed with ice cream, though. I’ve seen the way you eat fish.”
Abruptly, Mr. Zoo opened the door and ushered Houdini in. Without a word, the gate slammed shut and I stood there, frowning at it.
I couldn’t dwell on the rudeness for long, though. I had to get to the boys and so Maria wasn’t late for work. I stopped by my house to change quickly and then ran to Maria’s. When I walked in, she had a twin hanging from each arm, both of them crying.
“Thank god you’re here. Take them, please.” She passed Jonas to me and then Jayden. “I’ve got to stop and get gas. I’m going to be late.”
The boys cried harder. I bounced them on my hips and made soothing noises. “Sorry I’m late, Maria. I got caught up.”
“Doing whatever it is that’s making your face light up lately but you won’t tell me about?”
I snorted. “You’d better go.”
She winked at me and hurried to the door. “Good luck with them today. Sorry to dump them on you in their condition and run.”
“Well, they’d better be good if they think I’m taking them to Clotilde’s for ice cream. Naughty little boys don’t get ice cream.” I laughed when both boys stopped crying instantly. I mouthed the word “Magic” to Maria.
Maria rushed back and planted a kiss on each of her boys’ heads. “Love you all!”
She left and while the boys had stopped crying, they were still cranky and whiny. They fell asleep on the couch while I made them breakfast. The sound of the cartoons on the TV kept me company while my thoughts faded back to Alexei.
I did my best to suppress those thoughts, though. I wouldn’t be wise to act on them with him. No matter how forceful he was, I couldn’t trust whatever it was Alexei thought he wanted from me. It was always the same with men. They initially swore they could handle the snickers and the stares and the open contempt, but eventually it always ended the same way. A man could only hear the same bullshit so many times before he couldn’t help but start to believe it.
After everything that happened in the period of my life I liked to refer to as LBSK (Life Before Sunkissed Key), I had attempted to enter into a few different relationships. I’d learned the hard way that it was impossible for a man to truly trust a woman when he was told over and over again that she was a vicious, backstabbing whore.
Then, there was the added stress of strangers who looked at them with pity. One of my exes had left me because he couldn’t handle constantly feeling like a fool.
At the end of the day, for most of the people, I wasn’t worth the trouble. My own family had had to distance themselves from me after the show. They were relieved when I’d moved out of state and hundreds of miles away from Rocky Gorge. So, I had no delusions that the same thing wouldn’t happen with Alexei. Sure, he would stand up for me in the beginning. They usually did. Being a hero was an ego boost for a while. Defending my honor would get old, though. A man could only fight so many battles before he began to wonder if it was even worth the bother.
No matter how much Alexei thought he wanted me, he didn’t know the truth. He didn’t know the real me.
If only I could deal with the damned loneliness. Knowing nothing was going to change regarding my relationship status, it almost made me angry that I’d ever met Alexei. I’d been fine before he started making my heart go all aflutter and shit.
I checked on the boys before plating their scrambled eggs and making a conscious effort to shake off my pity party. It wouldn’t do me any good. I had two little boys to play with and that was enough. Especially if I took things one day at a time.
I turned the TV off and woke the boys up. “Rise and shine, little monsters! We have a big day ahead of us and it’s time to get started.”
12
Heidi
Jonas whined while eating his eggs, but still somehow managed to finish and ask for more. Jaydan just ate in a state of grogginess and most of his eggs ended up on the floor. I let the boys each eat a squeezable yogurt while I gave them baths and got them dressed for the day.
Maria and I had discussed the boys’ morning activity schedules and we’d both agreed that it would be beneficial to include educational pursuits. So, our morning was full of learning activities. We colored and played on the beach, but they also listened while I read to them and we worked on the alphabet.
I was proud of how smart and how well rounded they w
ere. They could both sing the entire alphabet song and could write out some of the letters. They were going to be well prepared for entering preschool. In fact, I wasn’t trained in early childhood education and they were quickly surpassing what I knew in regards to teaching kids. I’d soon need to do research to keep up with them if they kept sucking up everything I taught them so fast.
I handed them each a half of a sandwich before we left the house, or I knew there was a possibility of hangry tantrums. Then, we were off. I didn’t trust them at all in public. I knew them better than that. While I’d always felt so sorry for children when I saw them in those leash contraptions, after dealing with Jaydan and Jonas in public, I understood the necessity.
Maria didn’t use the leash system when she took them out, but they were her kids. If she lost one, they were hers to lose. If I lost one...well, I wasn’t taking any chances. Plus, I kind of liked the little brats. I didn’t want them getting into any danger.
The leashes weren’t as awful as they sounded. They were little monkey shaped backpacks that clicked closed around their little tummies and I looped the ends of the animals’ tails onto my wrist. So, technically, the animals were on leashes, not the kids. I still felt slightly awkward about the leashes and I hoped the boys didn’t hold it against me when they were older. But, if they did, at least they’d be alive and well while they blamed me in therapy.
We walked down Bluefin Boulevard to Coral Road and then connected to Main Street. Another reason for the leashes, Main Street was sometimes busy enough that I wouldn’t trust one of them not to dart out into traffic the moment the opportunity presented.
It was lunchtime and our little island was busy with locals and the tail end of the tourists for the season. We passed plenty of people we knew and made small talk before going on. Outside of Pete’s Pets, the boys stopped to pet Pete’s big dog, Blossom. We waved at Mann Family Dentistry because, even though Maria couldn’t see us, the boys knew where Mommy worked. On the other side of the dentist office was Clotilde’s Creamery.
Clotilde had passed years earlier, but her daughter, Cameron, ran the place just as well as her mother had. Clotilde’s had a big statue of a cow on top of the building. It was rumored that Clotilde had grown up in Idaho before moving to the Keys and the cow had been modeled after her favorite cow from childhood. I thought all cows looked alike, but apparently the big cow on the roof was the spitting image of Moona Lisa.
Cameron was at the counter when we walked in, the bell over the door announcing our entrance. Despite the customers lined up, Cameron’s eyes were drawn to us. “Hey, guys!”
Jayden and Jonas waved to her and pulled me to the counter so they could press their noses up against the glass of the ice cream display and look at all the flavors. They were lost in a world of potential when I felt the air shift around me with another ring of the bell. I looked over my shoulder and couldn’t help but smile when Alexei walked in.
He grinned as he sidled up to me, not even bothering to hide his stalking. “I saw you walk in and couldn’t stop myself from following.”
“Some would consider that creepy.”
He stepped closer to me as someone edged by us. “And you?”
I narrowed my eyes at him and fought another stupid smile. “I consider it concerning behavior. You should definitely be checked out.”
He held his arms out to the side as though offering himself to me. “Go right ahead.”
I laughed and rolled my eyes. I was saved from having to respond by a tug at my hand. I looked down at Jayden and found him watching Alexei. His big blue eyes were curious, the new man presenting an interesting puzzle. I knelt in front of him and held his little waist in my hands while pulling Jonas closer.
“This is Auntie Heidi’s friend, Alexei. Have you decided what ice cream you want?”
Jonas nodded and pointed back at the display, not concerned about Alexei. “The pink one.”
I grinned. “Good choice! The pink one looks delicious. It’s strawberry. You want strawberry?”
Jayden tugged at my hand again and leaned in to whisper in my ear that he wanted the pink one, too. His eyes were still focused on Alexei.
Alexei squatted next to us, his powerful looking thighs stretching his jeans as he did. “Hi. I’m Alexei. I want the pink ice cream, too.”
Jonas immediately went to Alexei and held out his arms to be picked up. “You big.”
I laughed, surprised at him. There was something deeper than surprise, something warm and fuzzy at seeing Jonas in Alexei’s arms, but I ignored it. “We don’t tell people they’re big, Jonas.”
Jayden had watched silently, but suddenly, he wanted Alexei to hold him, too. I pursed my lips, not enjoying being an outcast in my own group. Alexei, wearing an ear to ear grin, easily picked up Jayden, too, holding each boy in a thickly muscled arm. His expression was one of victory.
I watched them for a second while he leaned them over the case, showing them the ice cream closer up. Part of me worried that Maria would be pissed about a stranger holding her boys, but for some stupid reason, I trusted Alexei. They weren’t my kids, though.
As if she’d been reading my mind, Maria popped into the shop. She waved at Clotilde and then came over to us. Her eyes raked over Alexei and then focused on me. I could tell she had something brewing behind those brown eyes and when she got closer, I could see it was mischief. “Hi, babies!”
Jayden and Jonas waved at their mother, still content to remain up high in Alexei’s arms. I nervously tucked my hair behind my ears, feeling flustered at being caught out with her kids and a man that she didn’t know. “Hey! We came to get ice cream and ran into a friend.”
She wagged her eyebrows at me. “Uh huh.”
Alexei extended a hand, despite having the kids wiggling in his arms. “I’m Alexei. You’re their mother?”
Maria grinned. “I am. Maria. You must be the reason my best friend has been so mysterious lately? She’s all daydreams and secret little smiles, but she won’t breathe a word about why.”
He met my eyes and a heated expression passed over his face. “I hope so. I’ve been trying my hardest.”
I groaned while Maria floated away on some romantic cloud. Lord have mercy.
13
Alexei
Heidi was in a short sun dress that showed her long, smooth legs. The dress was yellow with little white flowers all over it. The swells of her breasts were showing just slightly over the scooping neckline of the dress. Her toes were painted a seashell pink and her fingernails matched. Her thick, wavy caramel colored hair was tied in a ponytail and everything about her made me think thoughts and feel feelings I had no business thinking and feeling while holding two innocent little boys in my arms.
Spotting her had been a happy accident. I’d been grabbing lunch for the team, but after seeing Heidi slip into the ice cream shop, I’d quickly decided it wouldn’t hurt them to go without a meal. Watching her interact with the two little boys had been an extra perk. She was sexy as hell, and so beautiful that she stole my breath. Observing her motherly interactions with the children stole my heart.
Fuck, I sounded like a teen romance, but there it was. Heart stolen. It was the moment that I knew—without a doubt I knew. She was my mate. My bear had been in love with her since day one, minute one. I supposed it took me longer because I couldn’t believe that it’d been so easy to find her. There was no arguing it, though. Standing in that ice cream shop, I knew it just as well as I knew my name. She was the one.
Maria cleared her throat and I realized I was standing there staring at Heidi amidst an awkward silence. Maria broke the silence. “I’ve got to get back to work. I just ran over because I saw you walk past the dental office with my little guys.”
Heidi pulled her friend a few steps away, her eyes still on me. She whispered something privately, but I was a shifter. I had amazing hearing. “I’m sorry, Maria. I didn’t plan this. If you’re uncomfortable with the boys being around someone you don’t
know, I’ll tell him to go.”
Maria scoffed. “You act like I don’t trust you. Those are practically your kids, too, Heidi. Judging by the way you look at him, you like him. So, I do too.”
Heidi’s cheeks tinged pink, but she just rolled her eyes and waved her friend off. “Want me to get something for you while I’m out?”
“Would you? I had a couple of people schedule for this afternoon, so I won’t be home for a little while.”
The little boys wiggled in my arms and one of them tugged at my hair. “Ice cream?”
I grinned at him. “I get it. It’s hard to wait while the grownups stand around talking, isn’t it?”
Heidi came back to my side and glanced back at Maria. She mouthed something and then looked up at me, face red still. “Sorry about that. I just had to ask her something.”
I looked down at her, impressed with the way she put the kids first. Cocky, or not, I thought she wanted to see me. Yet, she was willing to send me away if Maria was uncomfortable with a random man hanging out with her kids.
“Ice cream!”
She cocked her head to the side and gave the screaming boy a look that said she disapproved. “We don’t scream for things we want.”
He pouted at her and big tears welled up in his eyes. “Ice cream.”
“Remember the magic word? Can you say please?” When the little ones both said please, she smiled, her face lighting up. “That’s better. Now, we’re still all getting pink?”
“So that’s the magic word! I’ve been wracking my brain for the right word to get you to go out with me.” I winked at her and laughed when she gave me an exasperated look.
It felt strange to be standing there, two kids in my arms, waiting on my mate to order our ice cream. And by strange, I meant wonderful. It wasn’t hard to look at her and imagine a future with more of this in it. I liked Sunkissed Key. It was hot, yeah, but I could deal. Heidi and I could buy our own house here and start a family of our own. I liked the idea of it. Matter of fact, I loved the idea.
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