by J. L. Beck
Will she still want my touch so willingly? Will she still seek out my warmth? She’ll always be my wife, but will she enjoy it… be happy? I don’t know the answers to those questions, and for the first time in my life, I consider doing something different.
The image of my mother’s lifeless body fills my mind, the vacant look in her eyes. He took the only good thing I ever had from me, and so I took her. There is no changing something that was fated. I cannot let her get under my skin. I cannot allow myself to care for her any more than I do because if I do, all will be ruined.
She is a weakness I cannot afford.
21
Elena
The days pass, and we fall into a new kind of routine. Julian has breakfast and dinner with me every day, he even lets me pick where. Most of the time, I choose the terrace, of course, because the outdoors calls to me.
For lunch, Marie comes and eats with me. Sometimes she stays for over an hour, and we just talk. Julian also lets me pick more books from the library and orders more online from my favorite authors. I have so many that I’m now reading a different romance novel every day. I tried to convince him to let me have an e-reader, but he didn’t go for it.
It’s a nice distraction from the memories that haunt me from the night of the auction. I don’t know what was worse, helplessly watching those girls being sold, seeing my father trying to bargain to buy me back, or having that vile man talk to me and touch me.
I’ve been trying to forget that whole night, hide from those thoughts the same way I hid the key my father gave me under the bathroom sink. I seriously don’t know what to do. I just can’t believe that Julian is trying to kill my father, even more unbelievable is him trying to kill me.
He has been kind to me, gentle even. He’s never lied to me, at least not that I know of. Every time he gave me his word, he stuck to it. It proved to me further what I already knew, that deep down parts of him are still good.
It’s almost lunchtime when I finish the book I started yesterday. Just as I flip to the last page, I hear someone approach the door. A moment later, the lock disengages, and the door opens.
I’m about to greet Marie, but instead, I find Julian stepping into the room. My heart constricts in my chest. He’s wearing nothing but dress slacks and a white button-down, the sleeves rolled up, showing off his forearms. My mouth waters, and I clench my thighs together, remembering the things he did to me with his mouth, wondering what other magic he can do.
As if he knows what I’m thinking, his stormy blues narrow.
“Hi!” I squeak.
“You look surprised to see me.”
“Because I am. Are you not working?”
“I took the rest of the day off. I want to have lunch with you by the pool, maybe go for a swim before?”
“Really?” I jump off the bed, and without waiting for his answer, I run into the closet. “Do I have a bathing suit?” I yell from inside.
“Yes, probably the bottom drawer, that’s where she put my swimming trunks,” Julian explains as he leisurely leans against the door frame.
I pull open the last drawer and find there is indeed, a stack of different bathing suits and bikinis. I pull the one on top out, not bothering to waste precious time, I get undressed as quickly as I can, then pull on the bathing suit.
Julian gets undressed as well, not in quite as much of a hurry as I am. I go to his side of the closet and take out a pair of swimming trunks. When he is completely naked, I hand them to him, trying to not stare at his semi-hard penis hanging between his legs.
“Ready?” He smirks after pulling on his shorts. Clearly, he saw me looking. My cheeks feel like they’re on fire as I nod my head, yes.
Together we leave the bedroom, and Julian lets me walk beside him at my own pace, rather than tugging me along behind him. I smile, enjoying the new freedom, the words from the bathroom and the key I have stashed, hang heavy in my mind.
If I try and escape, all of this will go away. His kindness, my freedom…
“Is everything okay? You’re very quiet,” he questions, giving me a guarded look as we walk down the stairs.
“Yes, just thinking how nice this is. Being able to walk on my own and getting to go outside.” I beam joyfully. “I love swimming, but my father wouldn’t allow it often.”
At the mention of my father, Julian’s eyes darken, and his lips turn into a frown. Not wanting to ruin this day, I quickly change the subject. “Can I ask you something… about the auction?”
“You can, I can’t promise I’ll answer though.”
“The girls that were sold, what happened to them? They didn’t look like they were there out of their own free will.”
“I’m sure they weren’t. Women hardly ever sell themselves willingly, though I have seen it happen. Desperate times and all. As to what happened to them exactly, I can’t tell you. Whoever bought them gets to decide that.”
“Have you ever bought a girl?” I ask but look down, too afraid to see the look on his face.
“You know I have.” He chuckles. “You.”
“Oh, I mean–”
“No, not like that. I only bought you, and I’m not planning on buying someone else if you’re worried about that. Markus has got that handled.”
“Markus?” I remember him and Julian talking at the auction, their exchange was heated when I interrupted them.
“Yes, he bought one of the girls.”
“Wow…” I quickly run every interaction I’ve had with Markus through my head, which is not a lot to go by. I can’t tell if he is the kind of guy who hurts women. “Can I meet her?”
“No. They aren’t here, and even if they were, I’m not sure I would allow the girl on the property. Most of the girls sold are…” He pauses, contemplating his words. “Broken, you could say, and who knows her mental state? I won’t have some crazed girl running around here.”
Frowning, I nod. “Will she be okay?” I ask as we reach the terrace. The sun is hanging high in the sky, and I love the feel of it on my skin. It’s like a toasty blanket wrapping around me.
Julian shrugs. “I don’t know. Markus is one of my best men. I trust him with my life, and with you, but I don’t know his dealings with women, so I can’t tell you. The girl should be grateful though, there are worse people that could’ve bought her.”
He’s not lying. After the auction, I realized that I could’ve ended up in the hands of someone far worse than Julian. Thus far has been okay, but we aren’t married yet, and I’m still not sure if what my father said was true. I want to ask him, but I can’t do that without giving away the key I stashed.
“It would be nice to have a friend,” I say. There is a pitcher of lemonade and two glasses on the table where lunch will be served.
“Friends are overrated,” he replies dryly, pouring each of us a glass of lemonade from the frosty pitcher before handing me one. “Plus, it seems like you made a friend with Marie.”
Immediately, I feel bad for having said that. Holding the glass, I reply, “I do have Marie, and I love spending time with her, but she’s working most of the day and is only allowed to see me during lunch. It would be nice to have another friend or at least be allowed to see Marie more.”
Julian shakes his head, and a breathtaking smile overtakes his face. “So needy.”
We each take a drink, and the lemonade slides down my throat, cooling my insides. Julian sets his glass on the table, and I do the same.
“Since you already pointed that out, I have another question.”
“Of course, you do.”
“Have you figured out who tried to kill me?”
“Unfortunately, I don’t have the answer. We ran into a dead-end, but you don’t have to worry. Something like that won’t happen again.”
“I still don’t understand why someone would want me dead. I’ve never done anything to anyone.”
“Don’t worry about it,” he says like it’s no big deal at all. “Come, I want to show you the pool.”
He grabs my hand, and it’s like I’ve put my fingers into an electrical outlet. Heat zings up my arm, rippling through my body, settling deep in my core. I can feel moisture build with each of my steps, memories of what he did to me the other night, how he gave me a massage, and then made me come with his tongue.
Forcing those memories out of my head, I concentrate on the here and now. Walking down the stone steps from the terrace, the pool comes into view.
“Wow, this is beautiful,” I whisper in awe, drinking it all in. The space is magnificent, and the kidney-shaped pool is so clear, you can see your reflection in the water.
Turning to him, I can’t help but slowly drag my gaze up to his face, my eyes lingering on his chiseled six-pack that I kinda want to touch.
“Have you gone swimming a lot?”
“Not enough, not worth the cost of the house, that’s for sure.” Another smile that steals the air from my lungs appears, and I need to get into the water to cool off because something is happening to me. I don’t feel like myself.
“Do you think the water is cold?” I ask, moving to sit at the edge of the pool, so I can dangle my feet in the water first.
“No, the pool is heated.”
Of course, it’s heated.
Tipping my toes into the water, I almost sigh at the perfect temperature. It’s not too cold or too warm, simply perfect. Feeling Julian’s gaze on me, I peer over my shoulder, shielding my eyes from the sun, so I can look up at him.
“Put your feet in. The water feels amazing.”
Julian stares at me like a puzzle he can’t find the missing piece to. Then he surprises the hell out of me by jumping into the water, making a huge splash in the process. Water flies everywhere, and I choose then to dip fully into the pool. Sliding off the edge, I sink into the water, shivering only slightly, the lower I submerge myself, the more weightless I feel.
The pool is much deeper than I anticipated, and my fingers grip onto the edge of the pool to stay afloat. When Julian’s head pops up from out of the water, I can’t help but stare at him, mesmerized by how he looks in this moment.
His hair seems black now that it’s wet. Droplets of water run down his perfectly-shaped face, and I have the urge to trace the tracks of those drops, to run my fingers along his cheek and down his jawline. He’s like a painting I want to bring to life. Shaking his head, he pelts me with water droplets, and I use my hand to shield my eyes, so I don’t get any water in them.
“Stop looking at me like that and come swim.”
“Um, I’d rather stay here on the side of the pool. I’m not a great swimmer,” I admit.
Puzzled, he asks, “You can’t swim?”
“I can, just not well. Like I said, I wasn’t allowed to swim often.”
“Come on then. Let me see. I won’t let you drown.”
“You sure?” I tease, while genuinely wondering if he would.
Cocking his head to the side, he studies me, kinda like I was studying him earlier but in a less sexual way.
“Do you trust me?” he asks, swimming closer, looking more and more like a shark.
I think for a moment before answering, my tongue becoming heavy. “Yes.”
“You hesitated.”
“Can you blame me? It would be very easy to make it look like a drowning, wouldn’t it?”
Julian’s features become icy as he treads water two feet in front of me. “Spoiler alert, if I wanted you dead, sweetheart, you’d already be dead.”
“Okay, but I still don’t want to drown.”
“Nothing’s going to happen to you,” he says, and then I feel his rough hands on my bare hips, dragging me toward him. “Let go of the side of the pool and trust me.” Looking over my shoulder, I eye my hand, which is slowly slipping from the edge of the pool. Trust or not trust? Warm breath fans against my cheek and ear. “Trust me like you did the other night when you let me eat your pussy.”
At his crude words, I squirm in the water, feeling them pulse in my center. How does he do that? How can he get me aroused with nothing more than his words?
I push off the side and start kicking my legs out. Using my arms, I push at the water, keeping myself afloat, but barely. I’m sure I look pretty ridiculous right now.
Julian doesn’t seem to care though and tugs me closer, lifting me, so I’m not chin-deep in the water. His face is inches from mine, the water beading against his skin, teasing me. Making me want to lick them away. Something about him makes my blood turn to molten lava.
I want him, need him, and that terrifies me so much because the last time I allowed myself to love a man, he sold me for ten million dollars.
22
Julian
Her pink tongue darts out over her bottom lip, and I’m tempted to kiss her, to bite that plump flesh. Her eyes are shiny, iridescent, and I know if I stare for too long, I’ll get sucked right into their depths.
“What did you think of me the first time you saw me?” I don’t know why I ask this question, but I have often wondered the answer. Maybe because seeing her for the first time was such a profound moment for me. It changed the course of my future. In an instant, I knew what I had to do.
“Honestly, I didn’t think much when I saw you at my mother’s funeral. I don’t even remember much from that time, but I do remember you being there. I thought you looked dangerous, but so did all the other men there. Your eyes stood out to me, though. I felt like you could see right through me. I still think you can.” Her eyes hold mine, and right in this second, it’s like the world around us melts away. It’s just us, floating in a pool, no worries, no revenge, no mafia.
“What about you?”
“I knew I had to have you. The very first moment I saw you, I knew.” It’s not a lie, but I will leave the other part out for now. The part where I wanted nothing from her than to use her for my revenge. Soon she’ll discover that all of this was nothing, a facade, and by then, she’ll be trapped, married, and bound by a vow and blood. Just like the mafia, there is no out in marriage, there is only death.
I want to ask her what she thought of me the second time she saw me, the time I stole her away from her father and everything she ever knew, but I already know the answer to that. I know she hated me and feared me in equal parts.
She hasn’t looked like that at me in a while. Her fear and hatred have turned into trust and calmness. It’s what I expected, what I had hoped for, but what I didn’t see coming is how much I would enjoy it.
I can’t help but wonder if I could somehow have both. Could I get my revenge on her father without breaking her trust, without breaking that fragile bond that has formed between us? The fact that I will eventually kill her father tells me, no, but maybe if she was in love with me, if I turned her against her father completely? I could keep this, whatever it is going on between us.
We’ve floated to the center of the pool. Elena uses me as a life preserver, her fingers wrapped around my biceps. Her eyes dart down into the water, and when she looks up, I see panic at the edges of her eyes.
“If I drown, I will come back as a ghost and haunt you.” She smiles nervously.
“Haunt me, huh?” I cock a brow and start to pull away a little. “You have to have more faith in yourself. After all, you’re going to be a Moretti, and we never fail at anything we put our minds to.”
Her nails rake across my skin as she tries to grasp onto me, but I slip away. She moves her legs a little faster, treading water so she can stay afloat. I would never let her drown, but I want her to trust herself, trust that she can do this.
“I’m not a good swimmer, Julian.” She blinks slowly, and I can see the panic inside of her rising up, filling her delicate features with chaos.
“Calm down, focus on your movements, and breathe slowly,” I tell her, but her movements become jerky, and soon she starts to sink into the water like a stone, her panicked emeralds finding mine.
Unable to bear watching her another second, I wrap my arms around her waist. I hold her to m
y chest and guide us back to the edge of the pool.
She clings to me, and it’s impossibly fucking hard not to notice her perky breasts plastered to my chest. My reaction to her is instant, and my cock swells in my swim trunks. Ignoring the stiffening rod, I release her, and she clutches onto the side of the pool with trembling hands.
“Are you ready to get out and have lunch?”
“Yes,” she murmurs.
A soft little gasp passes her lips when I grab her by the hips and lift her out of the pool, the sound going straight to my cock.
By the time I’m out of the water, Elena is standing, her arms wrapped around her chest. Snagging a towel off one of the sun chairs, I wrap it around her.
“Thank you,” she whispers.
Dragging the towel over my face, chest, and arms, I shake my head before tossing it back onto the chair. Turning, I grab Elena’s hand to walk us back up to the house but stop in my tracks when I find Lucca standing near the French doors.
His eyes meet mine, and I grit my teeth. He knows I don’t talk business in front of Elena, and that’s exactly why he’s here. I didn’t want to have to deal with anything today. As we get closer, he gives me a nod. I release Elena’s hand and pull out a chair for her.
She looks between Lucca and me as if she can feel the tension in the air before sitting down.
“I need a word with you, boss.” Lucca clears his throat, averting his gaze away from my soon to be wife.
I should’ve known letting Markus go on vacation was a stupid idea. Killing Lev is going to come with a blowback that I’m not sure Lucca is ready to deal with.
Leaning down, I whisper into Elena’s ear. “I’ll be back in a min.”
She nods, and I walk over to Lucca, clamping a hand on his shoulder and guiding him away from Elena and back into the house. We don’t stop walking until we’re at the end of the terrace, where I know she can’t hear, but I can still see her.