"She was talented," I mutter.
"Very." His answer is matter-of-fact, devoid of emotion. "Aren't you going to read it?"
There isn't much text on the page. There are a bunch of lines of Lilly Anna writing her name down as Mrs. Oakes though, and the sight of them sends a jolt through my spine. I'm jealous, I realize. I'm jealous of the dead girl again.
Then, finally, I see the words. I don't know how I hadn't noticed them before. Right there, in the upper left corner.
Dex's best kept secret is... that he killed his parents.
I pass the page back to Dex, unable to comment on what I just read. He takes it, and our fingers meet for a split second, sending sparks flying.
"How could she say that about you?" I finally whisper. "Did she actually believe it?"
He shrugs. "I saw her writing here one day... Couldn't resist the urge to go through it when she wasn't looking. We got into a huge fight about it."
"That's horrible," I whisper. "You're not responsible for their deaths, Dex."
His mouth sets in a thin line and he refuses to reply. I want to reassure him, tell him that the lie is vicious and horrible, but he shuts me out with his body posture, refusing to let me in an inch closer. I don't know how to help. It gets me thinking about my own situation, about finally being free from Father. On an impulse, I reach for Dex's hand, and his eyes find mine.
"You're free from her now," I say softly. "Just like I'm free from my father. They can't hurt us anymore."
Dex smiles, but it's rigid, and I wonder whether there's anything else he's hiding from me. I don't dare ask, too afraid of his answer.
We settle on the bed together again, and I find my way into the crook of Dexter's arm. He holds me close. Neither of us speaks. The silence is companionable, though, and I find myself relaxing into his embrace, slowly drifting deeper and deeper into slumber with the thought of revenge playing on my mind, over and over again.
The next morning, Dex and I get ready for school together. We put on our uniforms, and my heart rate accelerates as Dex drives us to school himself. He parks one of his cars, an Audi A8, in the school parking lot, and we head up the steps to the ivy-covered school building together. He doesn't hold my hand, and I don't ask him too, though I want it badly - just as a sign of reassurance.
I know we'll get teased to hell and back, and I'm right. The moment we step on the school courtyard, the stares begin to follow us all the way into the classroom. The sound of snickering is ever-present, and Dex must sense my unease, because he does take my hand then, holding it firmly in his. I glance at his face, but his expression is troubled, unreadable.
We find desks next to one another just as Caspian strolls into the room, a shit-eating grin on his face when he spots us.
"Well well well," he drawls. "If it isn't Eden Falls' happiest couple."
"Fuck off, Caspian," Dex growls, getting up and standing in front of my desk protectively.
"Or else what?" His former friend scoffs. "You're going to fight me? Doesn't seem like you can do much else, does it? Not when you're broke as a fucking church mouse. All that money, Dex, all gone straight down the drain. And for what? Her?"
I feel his eyes on me, making me blush deeply as he stares me down. I refuse to give him the satisfaction of a reaction.
"Keep moving," Dex grunts. "Nothing to see here."
Caspian smirks. "Damn right there isn't. Just a little slut and the guy she's got twirled around her little finger. How long before she gets sick of you, Dex?"
Dexter glares him down, but Cas doesn't take the hint. I'm worried, the tension in the room palpable as the two guys face off. Everybody's looking.
"Don't talk about her like that," Dex finally orders him.
"It's not like you can stop me," Caspian laughs. "What, you really think she'll stick with you now that you're fucking broke? Just watch. She'll go back to one of us in no time. She just used you to get out of her father's prison."
"Why don't you say that to my face?" I speak up, surprising everyone by standing up for myself. "You think so badly of me and yet you can't look me in the eye to insult me. I wonder who the weak one is here?"
"Pandora." Dex's tone carries a warning I choose to ignore. Cas and I glare at one another, and I dare him to say something else. Just then, the school bell rings, and the professor strolls into the room, telling us to take our seats.
"This isn't over," Cas mutters and I smile sweetly in response.
"Damn right it's not," I say in return.
The lesson is tense, the promise of more trouble hanging heavy in the air. But I'm not afraid of the boys anymore. Let them fucking come atme. I can take it, and I can fight them off and make them regret ever crossing me in the first place.
I barely pay attention to the professor. My thoughts are spinning with ideas on how to get back at the inhabitants of this awful, prestigious little town. I'm going to make them all pay. Even Dexter.
After the class is over, we make our way to the gym together. We don't share any other lessons together, and I can tell Dex is hesitant to leave me by myself. I take his hand in the hallway, and his troubled expression meets my determined one.
"I'll be fine," I say. "They can't get to me anymore."
"I won't let them." His voice is fiercely protective, and it makes me shake my head.
"I don't want you to do it. I can take care of myself."
"But..."
"No." I press a finger against his lips. "Don't worry."
I stroll away, throwing him one last smile over my shoulder as I add, "They can't hurt me anymore."
I come to realize just how untrue that is during PE class. Audra is still just as determined to make my life a living hell, and she spends the better part of the lesson making me her bitch. Even the professor is afraid of her, so he doesn't stop her - nobody does. They throw basketballs at me, they push me so I stumble, they treat me like a punching bag for the next hour, and I take it all, because I know when revenge comes, it'll be so very sweet.
"Wish you had your boyfriend to protect you, don't you?" Audra mocks me in her signature syrupy-sweet tone.
"At least I have one." She flushes, but I'm not done yet. "And he's the hottest guy in the school."
"Enjoy my sloppy seconds," she blurts.
"Sure," I laugh out loud. "Is it really sloppy seconds if he just used you to get off? I don't think so, sweetie. You're nothing to him, and you never meant anything. How does that feel?"
Her eyes flash with anger, and I know she's about to retaliate just as the lesson ends. She smirks in my face, saying, "Saved by the bell... for now. Keep your eyes peeled, Oakes, because I'm fucking coming for you."
"We'll see," I purr, sauntering out of the room and toward the parking lot where I'm meeting Dex for the ride home. As I'm walking, I hear whispers and snickering again. I keep my head held high proudly and keep going, ignoring everyone's silence when I pass them.
I don't see the attack coming, and when the object hits me, I cry out loud and feel the back of my head. It's sticky, something's dripping down my back. I feel the burn of tears in my eyes but do my best to ignore it. I turn around, coming face to fact with Audra. She smiles innocently, twirling a strand of perfectly highlighted blonde hair around her finger.
"Oh, Pandora," she says in a sing-song voice. "You got some egg in your hair. Is that a new look? Because it doesn't look good on you."
I smile in response. "Your face doesn't look good on you either, and yet you continue wearing it."
She smirks. "Go wash up, little girl. You stink."
I roll my eyes and clutch my books tightly to my chest. I keep walking without looking back again, pretending she doesn't matter, pretending I'm not hurt. But the moment I set foot outside, tears begin to blur my vision, threatening to fall. I passed the bathroom earlier and there was a group of girls in front of it. I was too embarrassed, but when I see Dex waiting for me, I regret not fixing my appearance.
"What happened?" he demands
before I've even reached the car.
"What do you think," I mutter. "Audra."
His mouth sets in a thin line. He's pissed. Just then, Audra and her group of friends walk into the courtyard, and Dex calls her name. She beams when she notices him, sauntering over with a smug smile.
"You called?"
"Yeah," Dex hisses. "Have you fucking lost your mind? You can't treat her that way."
"Oh, and who's going to stop me?" Audra purrs. "You?"
"Yeah, me," Dex hisses. "I'm still a Firstborn, Audra. Don't you fucking forget it."
"That's true," she smirks. "But what exactly do you have, Dex? Nothing. You're a Firstborn to fucking nothing."
It finally strikes me that Dex gave it all up - for me. His inheritance, his money, his position in the family company - it's all gone. All for me.
Guilt threatens to eat me up from the inside and I do my best to hide it, hating the effect Audra's words have on me. Dex's hands form fists and I'm afraid he's going to murder Audra with words, but he doesn't say anything, just opens the car door and motions for me to get inside. I hesitate, not wanting to get his car dirty, but his death stare convinces me to do it.
He closes the door firmly and gets in too, not saying another word to the blonde who looks too smug for her own good.
Dex pulls out of the parking lot. We sit there in uncomfortable silence, and once again, I feel myself getting upset. But then, his palm finds its way to my knee. He rests it there, touching me gently. Reassuring me.
"I want to leave this place," I whisper halfway through the drive.
"Where do you want to go?"
"Anywhere..."
"Can I come with you?"
My head snaps to face him. I'm surprised, but I try not to let it show. "You don't want to stay in Eden Falls? This is your home."
"It's hell," Dex mutters, pulling up in front of the house. "Once I take care of... a few loose ends... I'll be free to leave."
"With me?"
"Yeah." His signature smirk makes my heart race even faster. "Is that okay?"
I don't answer, muttering. "I want to go back to Wildwood. But first, I want to meet my mom."
"You know where she lives?"
"I do."
"Then let's go," Dex says firmly. "We'll plan it. You're free now, Pandora."
I nod thoughtfully.
He's right.
I am free.
15
Pandora
My father called this morning, telling me I was to attend a dinner back at Oakes Estate with some of his family friends. I had laughed at him, but he quickly made it clear he'd make my life a living hell if I didn't show up.
And so it is that I find myself back at the house I hate the most in this whole damn town. Kelley gives me an apologetic smile as he opens the car door for me.
"I hope you get through it okay tonight, Miss Pandora," he tells me kindly. "I'll be here to drive you back when you're ready."
"Thanks." I heave a sigh and accept his helping hand, holding up my black glittering gown - another one of Lily Anna's hand-me-downs - as I make my way to the house.
If Father is forcing me to attend, I'll play a game of my own to fuck with his head. I got the dress with Minnie's help, and I've done my makeup and hair in a way to match Lily Anna's. I snuck out of the house before Dex could notice, because I have a feeling it would piss him off - but that's the goal, after all. I want a reaction out of Father. I want to humiliate him.
I'm also fashionably late. Everyone inside is two hours into dinner. I deliberately kept Kelley waiting, cringing for how evil I was being, but I wanted to piss Father off. Now that I can't keep an eye on Minnie anymore, I do anything to divert his attention so he doesn't hurt her again.
Climbing the stairs, I enter the Estate, and a pale-faced Belle leads me into the salon where several pairs of eyes lift to meet mine.
There's Bryony, as far away as she usually is, doped up on her pills. My brother smirks when he sees me, and even Tianna looks pleased. Several businessmen fill the armchairs in front of the fireplace, but Father is nowhere to be seen.
"Hello," I greet them. "What did I miss?"
Nobody answers. The intense stares follow me as I sit down next to Tianna. That's when Father stumbles in.
He looks disheveled to say the least. His hair is messy, he has scruff on his jaw, and his shirt's halfway unbuttoned. He slurs something and then comes to a full stop, eyes widening when he sees me.
"Lily Anna," he breathes, and a pain shoots through my chest when I realize he's drunk, and once again mistaking me for his other daughter. The one that wasn't really his at all.
I don't correct him, crossing my legs at the ankles like she used to, according to Minnie.
He walks over to me, and I flinch when his fingers wrap around my chin, making me look up at him.
"Is it really you?" he mutters. I stare at his scarred face, hating him for everything he's done to me and feeling sorry at the same time. I can't help it - he's such a sad figure, lost in some sick fantasy he'll never get to live out.
"I take it this is your other daughter," one of the suited-up businessmen speaks up, devouring me with his eyes. I shift uncomfortably in my seat, feeling the weight of his gaze on me. The dress I'm wearing is much more revealing than something I'd pick out myself, and I'm starting to feel naked.
"That's my only daughter," Father snarls, stumbling toward the bar cart in the corner of the room. I flinch again. I look at Bryony, but her pale face is unreadable, and Tianna won't meet my eyes.
"What are you gentlemen doing here?" I finally ask.
"You can guess," the second of the three men smirks, placing a palm on Tianna's knee.
I glance between the two of them, horrified. "You know she's not eighteen, right?"
He laughs, not replying, and my blood boils. I'm on my feet in seconds, slapping the prick's hand off. Tianna looks like she has completely tuned out, and Father hasn't even seen what happened, too busy mixing himself a double drink.
"You monster," I tell him. "You brought these men here... for what? You're going to take it out on her now that I'm gone?"
He turns to face me with his drink in hand, eyes devouring my features. He seems lost in his own world, as if he hasn't even heard what I've been saying.
"Hello?" I demand. "You need to send those men home."
"Is that what you want?"
"Yes." I cross my arms. "Send them home, now."
He turns to face the three men. "You heard her. Fucking go."
I'm shocked by the outcome. The men don't need to be told twice. They get to their feet, their eyes lingering on Tianna until I stand in front of her, shielding her from their predatory hunger.
"Leave," I spit out. "Go. Now. Bye."
One by one, they leave the room. The salon door slams behind the last one, and I turn to address my so-called family. "Do you mind if I have a moment alone with Father?"
"By all means," Brazen mutters, helping his sister up. He's gentle and kind with Tianna - the way he never was with me. It hurts.
Bryony gets up too, giving me a saccharine smile before tottering out of the room on her impossibly high heels. Good fucking riddance.
In a few moments, it's just me and Father. I approach him slowly, holding my shimmering gown up and sitting on the floor before him. He leans forward, a glass of whiskey in his hand, and softly smoothes away the hair from my face.
"I know you're not her," he mutters. "But you're close enough."
My heart shouldn't hurt, but it does. "Why can't I be enough? Me, Pandora?"
His lips tighten and twitch. He hates just hearing my name. He wants to live in the fantasy where Lily Anna is still alive forever.
"She's gone," I whisper. "She's dead."
"No," he shakes his head, closing his eyes.
"You know it's true," I keep going. "She's gone."
"No!"
"She's not coming back." I can't stop myself now, the words are spilling out. "Nev
er."
"No!" He throws his whiskey at the wall. Glass shatters, and a deafening silence falls on the room before he starts to groan. I realize he's sobbing moments later. He covers his face with his hands, ashamed of his own emotions.
"You're so fucking weak," I tell him. "You're falling apart."
"I'm nothing without her."
"She's... she was your daughter. It's sick," I spit out.
"I loved her." His crazed, drunk eyes meet mine. "I loved her like nobody else."
"Dex loved her too," I grind out. "And you drove her away. You're the reason she's gone."
His scarred face twitches and it's the first time I feel genuinely sorry for him. He's a mess. A wreck. And I'm glad I got out when I did, before I had to witness Emilian Oakes' downfall.
"She's alive, you know," he says as I pick myself up from the floor. "I can feel it in my bones."
"Even if she were," I mutter. "She's better off without you."
He falls to his knees before me. "I need to hurt someone."
"Then hurt yourself," I spit out. "You're the one who deserves it the most."
After our conversation, I leave Father sprawled on the floor and make my way to my former bedroom to collect some belongings I left behind. I feel strange being back in my room, alien. I never belonged here in the first place.
I pause in the doorframe of Lily Anna's closet. All her things are there, pristine, unworn in years, and a constant pain for Father, whose sick obsession just doesn't end. Her things are only making it worse.
I walk into the closet, fingers gliding along the rails upon rails of pretty things. I wonder whether my plan is wrong. Then I think about all the things I went through because of Father, everything he put me through. And I know he deserves this.
I start pulling things off the racks. I make a huge pile on the floor. Everything goes on there - her school diplomas, her rosettes from riding competitions, her drawings when she was a kid, all her clothes, all her possessions.
I stare at the pile before me with emotionless eyes for a minute. Then, I start pouring the bleach on it.
A Hurt So Sweet Volume Three: A Dark High School Bully Romance (Elite of Eden Falls Prep Book 3) Page 12