“Sofi…” Remi held her hand in the air, but there was too much space hanging between them. Not just physical either. “I just...I…”
“You what?” Sofi screeched, fisting her hair. She was trying to hold herself together, and even though I didn’t understand any of it, I wanted to be her support, I wanted to be there no matter what. It was what good boyfriends did. Right?
“I wanted to know you back then. But your dad—“
“Nope.” Sofi stepped back, holding her hands up in the air. “I’m not doing this.” She spun around and stomped toward the door and paused halfway there. “I knew you’d do this.” She clenched her hands at her sides, not turning her body but only her head to get eye contact with Remi. “You always blame him, but he was the one who was there. My dad. He saved me from you.” Her chest heaved on a breath. “Don’t contact me ever again. Live your life in the goddamn ghetto and leave me the hell alone.”
She kept her gaze fixated to Remi, pushing her point home before she darted to the door, flicked the lock, then left like the place was on fire.
I stared at the empty space, not knowing what to do. I was around conflict every time I worked the door at the club, Vibe, but things like this made me feel like I was in the middle of a sticky mess.
“I…” I pushed my hand through my hair again. “She…”
“Hates me,” Remi finished for me. She sighed, but it was sad and resigned, like she knew this was how it was going to go.
“I’m sure she doesn’t,” I tried, but even I could see the way Sofi felt.
“I wished she’d listen to me.” Remi leaned against the countertop, her body folding in on itself. “I was fifteen when I had Sofi. I didn’t know what I was doing.” I stared at the side of her face, wishing she’d look me in the eye. “Her dad…” She turned her face, her ice-blue eyes connecting with mine. There was so much emotion in her eyes that I gripped the countertop to keep myself in place. “I didn’t know what I was doing. And I had no idea what I was signing when he came in with his expensive lawyer courtesy of his CEO dad.” She snorted, her shaky hands pushing some hair out of her face, but she didn’t bother wiping away the tear tracking over her cheek.
“Does Sofi know that?” My brow furrowed. If she knew what Remi had just told me then she wouldn’t be so—
“She knows, but her dad is her hero.” Remi smiled sadly. “It is what it is.” She pushed herself off the countertop. “You should go to her.”
“I…” I took a step back, but my gut churned at the move. “Maybe I can get her to come back inside?” As the words rolled in my head, I was mentally counting how old Remi was. Thirty-six. I was closer to her age at twenty-nine than I was to Sofi.
Chapter Two
Remi
My palm flattened on my stomach as hope rose inside me. Rush’s words sounded nice, but deep down I knew it wouldn’t matter. It had taken me the better part of five years to get Sofi to see me face-to-face.
So many times people around me pleaded for me to give in, to accept that I’d never truly have Sofi in my life. But even the tiniest bit of hope meant that I would never give in.
Not yet anyway.
“It’s okay, Rush.” I swallowed past the lump in my throat, trying to put the brave face on that I’d worn since I signed my rights over without even knowing.
I gritted my teeth as I thought about that day in the hospital. I’d spent nearly two days in labour all alone. Being brought up in the system meant I never truly had any family, not until Sofi. And then she was ripped away from me just like everyone else was.
“I can try?” Rush said, but the expression on his face—the way his lips were in a flat line—told me that he wasn’t sure it would work. And if I was honest, I didn’t want anyone else getting involved.
“It’s fine.” I waved my hand in the air and pushed my shoulders back. “It was really nice to meet you, Rush.” I stared up at him—he was at least a foot taller than me at 5' 4.
His gaze flicked to the front door that was open a few inches then back to me. “I…” He shook his head. “Okay.” He stared at me for another couple of seconds, then turned and left.
I couldn’t resist following him and peeking through the gap in the door. He paused when he got to his truck—a huge thing just like he was. He hesitated, looking back before getting inside.
Sofi threw her hands up in the air, her lips moving a mile a minute, no doubt chewing him out for taking so long to get back to the truck.
He was a good guy, I could tell that from just the couple of minutes he’d been inside my home. He’d be good for her, at least I knew that.
Chapter Three
Rush
“Are you seriously going to just drop me off and leave?” Sofi asked, her tone higher than usual. I’d never heard her like this, and for the first time since we met, I was seeing her in a new light. One that I wasn’t sure I liked.
She hadn’t given her mom time to explain. She hadn’t even been in her house more than five minutes. What was the point in even going there in the first place?
“I’ve got work,” I grunted. I faced her in the cab of my truck where I idled outside her apartment building. The one with the doorman. The one her dad paid for. I’d never really cared before, but now that I’d seen a glimpse of her in another light, I couldn’t stop seeing other things.
I scrubbed my hand down my face. Now wasn't the time to think about all of this. I had an hour before I was due at work, and I still needed to head home and get a shower.
“Seriously?” She slammed her body back into the passenger seat, letting out a shout of frustration. “I asked you to go there with me because I knew she’d start and—”
“She’d start?” I raised a brow at her, leaning my forearm on the top of my steering wheel. “Sofi, that ain’t what happened.”
“What?” Her eyes bugged out of her head, and the temperature in the truck plunged to ice cold levels. “What the fuck, Rush?”
“What?” I lifted my palm but didn’t move my arm off the steering wheel. “You went in on her before she even—”
“Because she’s a shit mom!” She growled—honest to god growled. “She’s never been there for me, so what’s the point now? I’m grown. I don’t need her. It was fucking pointless.”
“If it was pointless then why did you drag me there?”
“Drag you?” She snorted. “You offered to take me!”
I stared at her. “Yeah, because she’s your mom.”
“People like her don’t deserve to be called a mom.” She grasped the door handle and pushed it open. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I opened my mouth to reply, but I didn’t get anything out before she slammed the door shut and huffed into the apartment building. Leaving me wondering what the hell today even meant.
Chapter Four
Remi
“Cheer up, buttercup.” I grinned as his voice pushed through the mess of thoughts running through my head. “I brought goodies.”
I turned just in time to see Hank hold up two coffees and a bar of chocolate. “You know me so well.” I sighed and spun my chair around, making grabby hands at the treats.
Hank grinned at me, unceremoniously dropping into the chair next to my desk. It was threadbare, the padding of the seat trying to escape through the frayed black cotton covering it. “So…” He placed the coffee on my desk, and I greedily sipped it, feeling the caffeine take effect almost right away. “How’d it go?”
I knew what he was talking about, but I stayed silent, enjoying the few seconds of peace before I had to tell him how it went with Sofi.
I glanced over at him, taking in his bright brown eyes and the small smile on his lips. He was patient, had been since the moment I met him almost a decade ago. “It...went.” I dropped my head and held my coffee tighter as I remembered Sofi standing in my kitchen. “She brought her boyfriend with her.”
“Yeah?” Hank shot forward, his eyes lighting up even more. “What did he look like?
”
I snorted. “He was huge, like, the rock huge.”
“No way.” Hank slapped his hand over his mouth, waiting for more information, and I couldn’t help but grin at him. He was a gossip queen, but I knew nothing I said to him would go beyond his lips.
“Yep.” I leaned back in my chair, quickly checking the time on the clock attached to the wall. It’d only be an hour until the kids rolled in from school, and once they were back here at the group home, it’d be as loud as a packed arena watching a famous pop star. “He was nice.” I chewed on my bottom lip, remembering how Rush’s face was full of concern as he stared at me when Sofi rushed out of my house. “I don’t think he knew what he was getting himself in for though.”
“Why?” Hank asked, frowning at me.
“She didn’t give me the chance,” I sighed. “As soon as I mentioned her dad—“
“Douche,” Hank interrupted, waving his hand in the air when I paused. “Sorry. Continue.”
I held in a chuckle as I opened my mouth again. Hank knew all of the ins and outs, as my best friend, I told him everything, not leaving a single regret unsaid. At fifteen, I’d thought I’d known what I was getting into, but I had no idea, not until they took my baby from me and refused me any sort of access.
I’d been fighting ever since. Even now that she was grown, I was determined not to give in.
But what if it was too late? What if she’d never seen the truth?
“As soon as I mentioned him…” I heaved in a breath. “She left. I should have known not to say anything about him.”
Hank placed his hand on top of mine, a sad look shining in his hazel eyes. “She’ll come around, Rem.”
“I’m starting to think she won’t.” I gulped, trying to keep a lid on the emotions bubbling up. “I think I lost her a long time ago.” I stared at a post-it note pinned to the bottom of my computer screen. The colour had faded thanks to the sun that shone through the window for several hours of the morning. “I’m not sure I ever really had her.”
The silence stretched in the small room, but it didn’t bother me. I’d been stuck inside my own head for days. I didn’t know what way to turn, what to do. I’d briefly entertained the idea of contacting Bradley—Sofi’s dad—but I’d slapped that aside almost immediately. He’d been the one to finally talk Sofi into seeing me, and that had lasted all of five minutes.
“You know what you need?” Hank announced, slamming his hand on the desk and making me jump. “A night out.”
I shook my head, this time not keeping my chuckle inside. “I have too much work to do to have a night out.”
“Really?” Hank raised a brow, leaning forward. “Because I’m almost certain you have Friday night off.” I opened my mouth, but he didn’t give me a chance to reply. “It’s a date. Me. You. And cocktails.”
“Hank…”
“Remi…” He winked, grabbing his coffee and standing. “I’ll pick you up at eight.” He planted a kiss on the top of my head and pulled back. “Okay?”
I closed my eyes, suddenly feeling tired. Hank was right. I did need a night out. And nights out with Hank were always fun, even if they did end up with him abandoning me for whatever guy he was hooking up with.
“Fine,” I relented. “Friday it is.”
Chapter Five
Rush
“Late again.” I smirked down at my sister, Haven, knowing it would annoy the hell out of her. “Do you ever look at the time?”
“What are you? The time police?” She rolled her eyes, darting past me and toward the staff area at the back of the bar. “Shouldn’t you be at the door already?”
“Touché.” I saluted her, tapping on the bar top at the club we both worked at, then headed toward the front doors.
Friday’s were always our busiest nights. A mixture of couples on dates, people celebrating the end of the working week, and students kick starting their weekends.
I walked through the main doors of the club and halted in the walkway between the entrance and the outside doors. Blaise was already there waiting, but I knew he couldn’t open up the doors until I punched in the code.
“Blaise,” I greeted. He grunted in response, probably the most I would hear from him all night. He only worked a couple of nights a week to pick up some extra cash. Whereas I was here five nights a week.
I punched in the door code, straightened up, then pushed the doors open, already hearing the murmurs from the people lining up outside.
The club didn’t open until nine, but every night they lined up from eight, wanting to make sure they made it inside before we got to capacity.
I took up my usual post on the right and clicked my thumb on the small metal counter device I had gripped in my palm.
The night went the same as it always did: look scary and foreboding, warning people silently not to cause trouble with a single look, and making sure we never went over capacity.
Around 1 am, I stretched my arms in front of me, nodding at Jared as he pushed through the open doors. “Break time?” I asked. He worked in the main room of the club, but when we needed our breaks, he’d cover the front doors too.
“Yep.” He grinned at me, his boyish face fooling those around him. He may have been easy going, but he didn’t take an ounce of shit. “It’s crazy in there tonight.”
I pointed up at the clear sky. “It’s a full moon.”
Jared laughed, replacing me at the door. “Well shit, it makes sense now.”
“Yep.” I patted him on the shoulder and pushed my way inside, already annoyed that I’d have to push my way through the entire club to make it to the staff room. There should have been a quicker and easier way to make it back there, but whoever had mapped this place out hadn’t even thought about that.
The bass of the music thumped throughout the club, persuading bodies to move to the beat. My gaze snapped up to one of the cages hanging from the ceiling, looking for Haven. Like Blaise, she was only here a few times a week. This was just her side gig, because her true passion was being a nurse. One of the first memories I had was of her placing a Band-Aid on one of the many cuts I got when I was trying to learn a new trick on my skateboard.
As if she could feel me looking at her, she met my gaze, raising her hand then continuing to dance like her life depended on it. It didn’t take long for me to spot her girlfriend, Thalia, nearby. They were inseparable these days.
I spun around, not looking where I was going, causing a body to collide into mine.
“Shit.” I grabbed their arms, keeping them upright. “Sorry.”
“My fault,” the sweet voice said, but I could barely hear her over the music blasting from the countless speakers.
I blinked, staring down at the familiar face. It only took a second for it to click. “Remi?” I frowned, not remembering letting her in. “What are you—“
“Found a table, Rem!” a new voice announced. He grabbed her wrist, pausing to stare at me. “Well, hey there, big guy.” He fluttered his lashes at me. “What’s your name?”
“Rush,” Remi answered for me. She shifted on the spot, but didn’t make a move to get out of my grip. My fingers tensed on her bare arms, my brain telling me to let her go, but my body had a mind of its own.
“Oh shit,” the guy said, snapping his fingers. “You’re the boyfriend?”
I frowned, but as I stared into Remi’s eyes, I found myself disregarding the other guy. “What are you doing here?”
“We came for cocktails,” she answered, stumbling closer as someone walked past her. “Hank is trying to cheer me up.” I nodded, understanding what she was saying without speaking the words. “What are you…”
“I work here.” I straightened up, remembering why I was here, and finally let her go. “I’m a doorman.” I cleared my throat, taking a step back. “Just heading on break.”
“Right.” She smiled up at me, her full lips lifting up, and for some reason, I couldn’t look away from them. They shone as the lights inside the club flit
ted over her face. “I’ll erm…” Her tongue flicked out, sliding along her bottom lip. I almost groaned at the move. “I’ll see you?”
She was saying bye but she still wasn’t moving away from me. Like a tether was connecting her to me. Could she feel the pull like I could?
Fuck. I slammed my palm through my hair, gripping the ends.
What the hell was I thinking? She was my girlfriend’s mom and I was over here not able to look away from her goddamn lips.
“Sure.” I jerked back, needing to put more space between us. “See you around.”
I didn’t wait this time, instead I turned on my heel and headed back toward the door. I hadn’t had my break, but I needed the distraction of working.
A distraction from her kissable lips.
Chapter Six
Remi
My stomach gurgled again, so I pressed my hand against it. I hadn’t been right since Friday. I swore I still had cocktails swishing around in there even now, three days later. At least the thumping in my head has dissipated after an entire day in bed.
I stared at the screen of my computer again, trying to make sense of the words, but it didn’t matter how much I looked, I couldn’t figure it out.
I let out a breath and leaned back in my seat. Working in the group home meant I wore many hats. I was technically the head of the house and the boss of everyone who worked here, but I didn’t like to look at it like that. We all had our roles here, and the main one was to make this a home for the kids who ended up here.
I stared at the stack of files on the edge of my desk, each one marking another kid who needed a place to stay, but we didn’t have any available beds.
I saw myself in each of the files, an unwanted kid that even foster homes didn’t want. Adoption was off the table for most kids who already knew their own minds. It was too much trouble for people to try and shape a kid who had trauma and a bad attitude, so they always went for the babies. The ones they could pretend are theirs until they were grown.
Outlaws: A Romance Anthology Page 5