by K. C. Crowne
I had my routine at the ranch, a routine I’d created over years of living, and between Ellie and Sam, my life felt all out of sorts – but in a good way. Things were going to be different as hell at the ranch.
I couldn’t wait to see what the weeks ahead had in store.
Chapter 4
SAMANTHA
Between the food and the events of the day, I was asleep the second my head hit the soft pillow. I woke up the next morning feeling more refreshed and ready to start the day than I’d been in a long, long time. Soft morning light poured in through the window, birdsong outside pulling me gently out of my rest.
I stretched and rolled my head from side to side. Life was good. It was surprising to be able to say it – after all, good hadn’t been the word I’d have used to describe my life in quite some time. A tinge of hope ran through me. This whole idea of packing up and starting a new life halfway across the country had been totally crazy.
But what if it worked?
I checked my phone and saw that it was a little after six. Before bed, Chance had sent me a text letting me know that breakfast was at eight, and my first day with Ellie would start after that. So I had time.
I hadn’t unpacked the night before, so I decided it was as good a time as any to settle my things in their proper places. I put my feet on the floor, the area rug soft and plush beneath my toes. I stretched again before standing up and turning my attention to the suitcase.
A whole life was in that suitcase, what I could pack in a hurry and stuff in my car, at least. A wave of sadness flowed through me as I thought about Portland, thought about everything I’d left behind. Nothing to do but start fresh. I opened the suitcase and looked at the clothes, books, and other little knick-knacks that been at the apartment I’d shared with Kyle.
Just thinking about the man sent a chill through my body. He’d been the reason I’d left, the reason I’d been forced to abandon my old life. I didn’t want to think about him ever again, but that wish wouldn’t be as easy as I wanted it to be.
And, of course, the moment I lifted the small stack of books out of the box, I was face-to-face with something that reminded me of him instantly. A stuffed panda bear, one he’d won for me at a local fair. I remembered the night like it was yesterday, Kyle playing the game where you shot the targets with an air gun. The man had been a crack shot, and at the time I’d thought nothing of it.
I picked up the bear and held it in my hands. The thing was so silly, so innocent, I couldn’t believe it was capable of reminding me of such pain.
I stared off into space, and just like a movie in my mind, the last night before I’d left Portland played. I was in Portland at the apartment. Kyle was standing in front of me. He was a tall, reedy man with sandy-blonde hair tied in a ponytail. He was thin but muscular, dressed in his usual sleeveless T-shirt and dark jeans. His face was thin, his features sharp. And in those dark eyes was a mania that chilled me to the core.
“You’re talking shit,” he said, putting his hands on his hips and staring at me hard. “You’re only saying that crap because you know it’ll get to me.” Kyle shook his head in total disbelief. “That’s just like you, you know? Always doing whatever it takes to push my buttons. It’s fucked up, you hear?”
I was back in the moment, trying to stay strong in the face of my fear.
“I’m not trying to push your buttons,” I retorted, my voice and expression calm as I could be. “I’m telling you how I feel.”
“And that’s how you feel, huh? Simple as that. We’ve been together a year, and now you wanna throw it all away, like what we had was some fucking trash. That’s what you’re telling me?”
He began pacing back and forth, reminding me of a caged animal, a predator too long kept from the hunt. More fear ran through me – I’d seen him like that enough times to know it meant he was capable of anything.
“Kyle,” I said, my voice shaking despite my effort to sound calm. “It’s…it’s not like that.”
He stopped, turning those wild eyes on me again. “It’s not, huh? Then tell me what it’s like. Because it sure as hell sounds like what you’re doing.”
“We had something,” I admitted. “Something special. I’m not saying it wasn’t ever good.”
“But you’re saying it’s not good enough. You’re saying that you’re, what, tired of me? Tired of what we have together?”
“Please!” I interrupted, my voice raising. “Stop putting words in my mouth! If you’d just give me a chance to expla—”
“I’ve given you all the chances in the world. And so far, you’ve given me nothing but bullshit!”
Talking would do no good. When he reached this point, there was no getting through to him. Sucking in a deep breath, I said, “Kyle, it’s over. I’ve tried, and I’ve tried to make things work, but it’s not going to happen.”
It was a generic answer, one that hid the truth of what I’d learned about Kyle that made me realize I had to leave. But bringing up that subject would only make things worse.
He stopped and stared off into space. His expression was wide-eyed as if he’d just realized something. He slowly turned his eyes on me. “I know what it is,” he stated, his eyes mad. “I’ve been in total fucking denial. But now I get it.”
“Wh—what?” I stammered nervously.
A grin formed on his face, a horrible little sliver that terrified me. “There’s someone else.”
“What?” I repeated the word in disbelief.
“You got a guy on the side. That’s exactly what the fuck is going on! You’re stepping out behind my back, screwing some other guy.” He shook his head as if he couldn’t believe it had taken him so long to figure it out. “How the hell could I have been so fucking blind!”
“No, Kyle – it’s not like that!” It was such a crazy accusation that I didn’t even know how to begin defending myself.
“Of course it is! One minute we’re happy, the next you’re talking about leaving. For what other fucking reason would you be pulling this bullshit if you didn’t have some other guy waiting for you?”
The jealousy I’d seen so many times was rearing its vicious head. Kyle had always been paranoid about other men and me, though I’d never cheated in my life. But that didn’t put his mind at ease.
He stepped toward me. Without thinking, I moved back until I hit the wall behind me.
“You’re…you’re scaring me, Kyle.”
He laughed, an ugly sound with no humor. “And now you’re playing innocent, acting like you’re some sweet, helpless girl who’d never do a thing like that. Total, total bullshit.”
“There’s no other man,” I repeated. “There’s never been another man. You have to believe me.”
Kyle scowled at me, madness gleaming in his eyes. He’d never laid a hand on me before, but at that moment, looking into his eyes, I understood he was capable of anything.
Before I could react, he pulled his hand back and brought it toward me. I gasped as I heard a thud when he punched the wall to the side of my face.
“You’re a fucking liar,” he growled, his face only inches from mine. “A liar and a slut. And I’m gonna tell you this right now, put it to you in words even you can understand – you’re not going anywhere, Sam. Because if I can’t have you, no one can.”
I cowered, holding my hands up in front of my chest to ward him off, to keep him at bay. “Please…Kyle, you have to stop.”
“Do you understand? If I can’t have you, no one can. It’s as simple as that.”
I opened my eyes; he was still staring at me, his eyes narrowed into hateful slits. Then, his fist still against the wall, he pushed himself off and stormed away. I watched as he stomped into the kitchen, returning moments later with a bottle of whiskey. He pointed at me, fiercely glaring. “Remember what I said. You’d better be here when I get back.” He grabbed his keys, opened the door, and stormed out.
I remained huddled in place for a long time before I was finally able to come to my
senses enough to start moving. And when I did, only one thought was on my mind: it was time to leave.
He hadn’t hit me, but he’d come close. Without a doubt, I knew it was only a matter of time before he finally crossed that line. I was not going to let that happen.
I packed my things, knowing that when Kyle went on one of his benders, he wasn’t likely to come back any time soon. And I left. Packed what I could and got the hell out of there.
I finally snapped out of the hideous reverie, shaking my head to rid my brain of the horrendous personal movie. Relief hit me as I realized I wasn’t in Portland, in the tiny apartment where I’d felt more like a prisoner than anything else. The cozy room at the ranch was a comfort, and I sagged as the tension left my body.
My situation now was so much of a contrast to what it was like before that it still felt like a dream. I’d gone from shacking up with an abusive, controlling man to being surrounded by family and nature and everything else I’d gone without for so long.
I glanced down at the stuffed panda. Without a second thought, I walked over to a small wastebasket under the room’s desk and dropped the toy inside, covering it with crumpled paper and other trash already there.
I was done with my old life and ready for something new.
Unpacking could wait, I decided. I stripped out of my clothes and stepped into the en suite bathroom. The room was spacious and clean, and a big smile formed on my face when I saw the shower was no ordinary one, but one of those double-headed showers that sprayed you from the front and behind.
I turned on the shower, hot water spraying out with perfect pressure. Then I stepped in, letting out an “oh, hell yeah” as the water flowed over my muscles, massaging out all the tension.
I was in total Heaven. I had time to kill, so I was in no rush. I enjoyed the first unrushed shower I’d taken since I’d left Portland and washing away the dirt and grime felt like washing away the memories of what I’d been through.
But a thought hit me as I tried to relax. It was only a matter of time before Chance, or one of the other members of the family, asked me the truth about what I’d left behind. Chance had seemed satisfied with my answer of wanting to start fresh, which wasn’t a lie.
Chance wasn’t stupid, however, and I was certain he’d try to get more details over time. I would have to tell him the total truth about why I’d left eventually. But how would he react? Would he think differently of me? My new situation at Rainbow Canyons was perfect, exactly what I needed. The idea of losing all that made my gut sink all the way to my feet.
I put it out of my head because I didn’t want to ruin my relaxing shower. When I glanced down and saw that my fingers had turned pruny, I realized I’d totally lost track of time. With a quick twist of the nozzles, I turned off the shower and jumped out. As I dried, a knock resounded through the room. I checked my phone on the bathroom counter and saw it was almost time for breakfast. Another knock sounded.
I threw a towel around my body and called out “one sec!” before stepping out of the bathroom. Just as I walked into the bedroom, the door opened. I turned, my eyes widening as I pulled a sharp gasp down into my lungs. My hand tried to close the door, causing the towel to fall from my body and onto the floor. I stood there naked as the day I was born, staring at Chance, whose expression was one of total surprise.
“Shit!” I reached down and grabbed the towel, wrapping it around my body.
“Aw, hell,” Chance said, averting his eyes and putting his hand in front of his face. It would have been comical if I hadn’t been burning with embarrassment. “I thought you said come in.”
“No-no-no,” I said, the words coming out in a panicked stammer. “I said one sec.”
“Shit. Sorry about that. Just, ah, just wanted to let you know breakfast is almost ready.”
“Oh! Okay, thanks.” I was still in a state of mild shock and wanted him to leave before I died of humiliation.
“Anyway, I’ll, uh, let you get back to it.” Without another word, Chance shut the door and was gone.
Holy shit. He’d misheard me, of that I had no doubt – it was a totally honest mistake. Chance didn’t remotely strike me as the kind of man who’d peek on women like that. But that didn’t change the fact that he’d seen me totally naked. And I wasn’t sure if I’d imagined it, but I could’ve sworn the faintest hint of a smile had appeared on his face before he checked himself.
It was insane, but I had to admit that part of me was kind of turned on by it. Chance was gorgeous, easily the most attractive man I’d ever seen in my life. And he’d seen me nude, and he’d liked it. Can’t believe you’re thinking about that right now. My inner monologue spoke up, letting me know exactly what it thought of the matter.
Nothing else to do, I finished drying off before throwing on some clothes and heading down for breakfast. The smell of eggs and bacon and sausage led me to the kitchen. When I walked in, I saw that the table was nearly empty. Mama G was there, along with Chance and Wyatt and Ellie. Seeing Chance made my face turn a hot, deep shade of red, and I quickly slid into the seat next to Ellie.
“Mornin’!” Mama G said, chipper as ever. “Was just about to send someone to check up on you.”
“Sleep alright?” Wyatt asked as he scooped a big mound of scrambled eggs onto his plate.
“I did!” Ellie nearly shouted, offering a big smile with her words.
“And I did too,” I said. “Should we wait for everyone else?”
“Nah,” Mama G answered. “Rest of the crew’s already out workin’. Don’t like it, but that’s life on the ranch for ya.”
Chance finally spoke. “I’m gonna take El into town to get some school supplies. Sam, if you’d rather relax and unpack, we can meet after lunch and get started on your first day. Sound good?”
“Sounds great.”
Our eyes lingered on each other’s for a few beats before I glanced away.
Chapter 5
CHANCE
Thinking about Sam like that was a huge mistake. But damn, I couldn’t help it. A woman as beautiful as her, standing naked in front of me? How could I not think about it? And if there had been any doubt Sam was the most gorgeous woman I’d ever seen in my life, the glimpse of her perfect, naked body right in front of me was more than enough to put that question to rest.
She was like a damn dream – curvy hips, round breasts, and an ass like I’d never seen.
But the whole thing made me feel ill at ease. I wasn’t supposed to have seen what I had. It’d been some dumb misunderstanding, me hearing something and her having said something else. My head had been a million miles away when I’d knocked on the door and asked if I could come in, my thoughts on the day ahead.
Fucking hell.
Sam had been cool during breakfast, but it was we needed to address what had happened. You don’t just accidentally see your newest employee naked and act like it was no big deal.
At my cabin, I tried to get the schedule for the next few days sorted out. The door opened, and Ellie flew into the living room, plopped on the couch, her attention a beckoning light on me.
“When do we start?”
I grinned and cocked my head to the side in mild confusion. “Since when have you been anxious to start the day?”
“I don’t know,” she said with a dramatic shrug.
She seemed a little conflicted, and I had a feeling I knew why. Ellie had been resistant to the move, making things difficult for me in the process. I understood the way she’d been acting, but that didn’t mean it had been any easier. But with Sam around, Ellie was showing some enthusiasm I’d never seen before. I loved it. At the same time, however, I could see that she didn’t want me to get that she was happy about it. My daughter was stubborn as they came, like her father, and she wouldn’t be letting go of what irked her any time soon.
“Can Sam teach me instead of going to school in town?” she asked.
Her question struck me. I hadn’t even thought about that. Sam had been a teac
her before coming to Texas. Maybe homeschooling wasn’t a bad idea.
“That’s an interesting idea, El. I’ll ask her.”
Ellie looked satisfied with the answer. “Mama G told me to come find you for lunch. She said if you don’t show up, she’s gonna make you do all the dishes.”
I checked the time, which I’d lost track of. The bell had been rung, and I’d missed it.
“Sam there?” I asked.
“Yeah, she was in her room putting stuff in the dresser. Does that mean she’s gonna be here for a long time?”
I rose and cracked my back, the hours in the desk having taken their toll. We had a family hike planned for that afternoon with some of the tourists, and I was eager as hell to get outside and take in some fresh air and sunshine.
“I don’t see why not,” I said. “If she’s lookin’ to stay, that’s fine with me.”
True, I’d given her a week probationary period. But already, I had no doubt she was going to do just fine. And Ellie’s enthusiasm for her only made me more optimistic that we’d found the right woman for the job.
“Then let’s go eat lunch!” Ellie squealed, bouncing out of her seat. “Mama G’s making grilled cheese!”
My stomach rumbled. Grilled cheese sandwiches were one of Mama G’s signature lunchtime meals. And they weren’t simple “white bread and American cheese” sorts of affairs. Nope – they were made with thick slices of homemade bread, rich cheese made right here on the ranch, and likely some tomato soup from the vegetables in the garden.
“Alright, alright. Let’s walk to the cabin – it’s nice and sunny outside.”
“Okay!”
Ellie bounded out the door, and I had to hurry to catch up. I fired off a quick text to Wyatt to pass along that we’d be running a few minutes behind for lunch, and we were on our way.
My daughter’s enthusiasm made me happy as hell to see. Was Ellie finally going to change her tune about life on the ranch? I didn’t want to get ahead of myself, but God, her settling down so we could be something like a normal family was about the nicest thing I could imagine.